The 100 uses for the Dangerous Derv Wand of Wonder.
I don't know who the author is
DM's Remember the word of command is Nikto! There is a 25% chance that when spoken other wands of wonder will go off also.
01--Target turns to stone.
02--Roll on experimental arrow chart.
03--Caster glows a bright pink.
04--Room or area is filled with a very bright light. <Sunlike>
05--Wand Summons 1D4 Skeletal Warriors.
06--1D20 Daggers fly from the wand towards target.
07--Magic washes over the caster <unlimited wish>
08--Heavy stone block appears above caster then falls...DODGE!!!
09--Wand shoots a fireball. Treat as normal fireball.
10--Wand teleports caster behind target.
11--Supercharge. Wand gains unlimited charges.
12--Monster Summoning 3
13--Gold pieces fly from wand. 1D12 thousand.
14--Target grows 2 more arms and 3 more feet in height.
15--Sputter. Sputter. Wand just shoots out sparks.
16--Random roll. One member of party grows branches.
17--Caster multiplies. Creates one more exactly like himself.
18--Target multiplies. Creates one more exactly like himself.
19--Wand disappears for 1D4 days. Reappears in casters hand.
20--Wand glows brightly. Will detect magic for 1D6 turns.
21--Dangerous Derv appears and will answer one question for party.
22--Wand shoots forth a multitude of flowers. Gets in everyone's way.
23--Magic washes over Caster. Can talk to animals for 1 week.
24--Monster Summoning 2
25--All gold on caster doubles. Double weight.
26--Disintegration beam. Disintegrates a 10'x10'cube.
27--Target gains an extraordinary ability.
28--Wand will remove caster out of dangers way.
29--Wand will develop speech.
30--Summons Earth Elemental. 10 hit dice. Will unerringly obey caster.
31--Target is hasted. Permanently.
32--Something of the casters appears in the targets hands.
33--Lightning Bolt 180' 10' wide.
34--Casters hair falls off. All of it.
35--Target disappears
36--Warps casters mind. Will attack party.
37--Luck increases by 1 permanently.
38--Caster is put into haste until end of battle.
39--Wand shoots forth water. 1000 gallons.
40--Wand turns to dust.
41--Party is teleported away from danger.
42--Time Stop. Everything is stopped but caster. 1D4 turns
43--Target ages 100 years.
44--Pit opens between caster and target. 20'wide 30' deep.
45--Makes 4 bottles appear before caster. Earth, Wind, Fire, Water.<elemental>
46--Monster Summoning 1
47--Caster gains Special Ability.
48--Caster becomes Impotent.
49--Caster learns 2 more languages.
50--Wand shoots gems out towards target. 1D20 gems of 500gp value.
51--Deadly poison drips from wand tip.
52--Summons 1 Star Demon. Very pissed and not pleased to be there.
53--Target's arms morph into iron spikes.
54--Roll on Experimental Healing Potion chart for caster effect.
55--Wand sucks in all available oxygen in the room.
56--Wand becomes highly magnetic.
57--Caster changes sex.
58--Target goes blind.
59--Wand opens a portal to a random plane.
60--Absolutely nothing happens. Go figure.
61--Summons a familiar. DM's choice.
62--Target's size is halved.
63--Caster gains X-ray vision for 1D10 rounds.
64--Target dies. Gets saving throw vs. death. if succ. 10D10 damage
65--Caster becomes immortal.<feels tingle. wont age.>
66--Caster doubles his/her weight.
67--Target becomes loyal to party. Will help them if possible.
68--Whole party starts to fly. Lasts 1D10 turns.
69--Target instantly goes berserk. double its attacks/melee no dodge
70--Wand makes a wild magic zone in room.
71--Wand makes a 100mph wind gust shoot towards target.
72--Summons a kender. Oh shit! :)
73--Wand creates a Bigby's crushing hand and sends it to target.
74--Target teleports behind party.
75--Caster turns to stone. Gets saving throw.
76--Target runs away from caster.
77--Target becomes smarter +5 Int.
78--Pit appears below target and caster. 10'deep
79--All magic in room starts to glow.
80--All Within 30 ft Go Blind for 1d10 Rounds (inclu. wand holder)
81--100-1000 lbs (1d10) of Manure buries Target Or Wand Wielder 50% chance
82--Target gains additional d6 1=hand 2=leg 3=head 4=tail 5=arm 6=foot
83--Random Magic Item From Party Disappears and a map reappears w/location
84--A Small Meteor Strikes Target 10d10 x1d10 damage up to 10-60 yards radius
85--Caster soul switches with target
86--Caster loses -1 from prime req.
87--Caster and Party IT's to random Tenanted Dragons Lair
88--Caster Gains Notice of Deity 50-50 bad or good
89--Random minor power added to random party item
90--Gates In Barbed Devil 50% attacks party or target then disappears
91--Wielder becomes monster attractor 25%
92--Target becomes missile attractor 300ft rad.
93--Wielder Gains 1d6 hits permanently
94--Random Magic Item within 50 ft drained of magic 1-6 days
95--Target or caster polymorphs into Bozo the clown (minus weapons) 50%
96--Target suffers Major wound (roll random critical)
97--Solar arrives to help or hinder depending on align or 50% roll
98--Bottle appears in front of caster (random)
99--Wielder loses any 1 curse (dm's option)
100-Wieldor becomes in love with next monster he/she sees