Hey, and welcome to my incredibly ugly, completely useless, giant-waste-of-bandwidth web page! This page is just about me, the Elvis of Rap (also known as Sarah Burney), the crap I like, and so forth. Leave now. It's boring.

What did I just say?

You just don't listen, do you?

Well, fine. Be that way.

Bitch.

    I'm a senior in high school, and I'm in the marching band. I'm a total loser. I even think people want to read this page, instead of just checking it for porn. There, now this page will show up on search engines. Porn. Porn, porn, porn. Yeah.

TV Shows I watch when I should be doing homework:
    -The Simpsons - possibly the greatest show known to man.
    -The X-Files - Hey, did you see that one, you know, with the aliens? That was awesome.
    -The Millionaire Show - this show makes me feel smart and attractive.
    -Saturday Night Live - it's just classic, dammit.

These Movies Don't Blow:
    -Fight Club
    -American Beauty
    -Ferris Bueller's Day Off
    -The Green Mile
    -Star Wars (all of 'em)
    -L.A. Confidential
    -American History X
    -Anything with Kevin Spacey or Edward Norton in it

These Bands don't Suck:
    -They Might Be Giants
    -Save Ferris
    -Reel Big Fish
    -Blink-182
    -AC/DC
    -The Jimi Hendrix Experience (not Jimmy Hendricks, dammit!)
    -Red Hot Chili Peppers

THIS STUFF SUCKS AT LIFE:

TV SHOWS THAT SHOULD DIE A SLOW PAINFUL DEATH:
    -Wheel of Fortune - It's just so easy. And Pat Sajak is scary. His hair never moves, not even in hurricanes.
    -Buffy the Vampire Slayer
    -Dawson's Creek
    -Shows on the WB in general

MOVIES THAT BLOW GOATS:
    -I Spit on Your Grave
           -Pokemon
    -Komodo
    -Battlefield Earth
    -Anaconda
    -Disney's The Kid

BANDS THAT SUCK
    -Barry Manilow
    -The Captain and Tenille (I always thought it was Captain Entinio)
    -Neil Diamond
    -Paul McCartney and Wings (he used to be a Beatle, for God's sake! What happened?)
    -Sonny and Cher
    -Lame 80's hair bands