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Hi everyone. Hope you are all doing well. Well,
the weeks almost over, and I for one am glad to see it. It has really been
a strange week. I hope the rest of you have had a much better week than I
have. Ok, now that I have done my daily complaining (sorry 'bout that), let's
get on with the Funnies. Today is
Winnie The Pooh Day....now
I for one just love Pooh...he's so laid back...hehehe. Tomorrow is
National Popcorn
Day....alright another day I can really dive in to....oops, no I can't I'm
dieting. Well I guess that means that all of you will have to have some for
me. Saturday is 
National
Butter Crunch Day...well there goes another day you will have to take care
of for me. What's with the food thing anyway...oh wait, I made these didn't
I? Somebody needs to have a talk with me. Sunday is
National Hugging Day.
Ok I can do that one.....{{{{{{{{{{{{Hug}}}}}}}}}}} to you all in advance.
There, I'm done with that one. Monday is
National Answer
Your Cat's Question Day. Ok cat owners, we all know that the cat has been
asking questions all along, so Monday you have to answer them whether you
want to or not....lol. Now that we have the days done until we see each other
again, on with the Funnies.
You Might Be A Redneck If.....
Your considered an expert on wormbeds.
Your kids take a siphon hose to "Show and Tell."
The dog catcher calls for a backup unit when visiting your house.
You've ever bought a used baseball cap.
Your CB antenna is a danger to low-flying planes.
You pick your teeth from a catalog.
You've ever financed a tattoo.
You've ever stolen toilet paper.
You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.
People hear your car a long time before they see it....hmmm I have a few neighbors like that
The gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot.
You prefer car keys to Q-tips.
You take a fishing pole into Sea World.
You think a turtleneck is the key ingredient for soup.
You've ever stood in line to have your picture taken with a freak of nature.
You think the French Riviera is foreign car.
When Bubba finally consented to take his wife Ida Mae to a play, they had hardly sat down when he jumped up saying, "Ida Mae, let's go!" With Ida Mae in tow, he went stomping out to the foyer, demanded his money back, and they left the theater. Out on the street, Ida Mae said, "Now you tell me what is wrong, Bubba Leroy Smith and you tell me right now, or I ain't going another step." Bubba said, "Ida Mae, I ain't no fool and I'm an only child. We done paid $20 of egg money for this here play and I heard somebody say that the second act was 20 years later! We ain't got that kinda money to be wasting on play acting when we don't even know where we will be in 20 years.".....you tell her Bubba.......lol
What is an Arkansas fortune cookie?
A biscuit with a food stamp inside.
Thanks Tonia!
The School of Ass___Ass-Crack Black-Jack
http://www.schoolofass.com/gamefiles/Acbj/acbj.html
http://www.justsaywow.com/delight.htm
http://members.aol.com/DIAN4/links.html
ZanyCartoons.com - Promoting the Best Flash Cartoons, Animations and Games on the Net for Free!
http://www.zanycartoons.com/GSFieldGoal.asp
Robin's Background & Gif Links!!
http://community2.webtv.net/Michelle41/RobinsBackgroundGif
Silly Cards - MadLib E-Greeting Cards. E-mail Pranks - Madlib Advice.
http://www.sillycards.com/
http://www.funstun.com/loveiseverything.htm
More You Might Be A Redneck If:
You go to a stock car race and don't need a program.
You've ever filled your deer tag on the golf course.
Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
MOTEL 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming..Oh my that's real bad...lol
You own more than three shirts with the sleeves cut off.
You've ever spray painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.
Your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her mouth before telling the state trooper to kiss her ass.
Your pocket knife often doubles as a toothpick.
You own a denim leisure suit.
You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
Your dog has a litter of puppies on the living room floor and nobody notices.
You've ever been kicked out of the KKK for being a bigot.
Your family tree does not fork.
You see no need to stop at rest stops because you have an empty milk jug in the car....ummmm.....YUCK!
There was this West Va. sheriff and his deputy riding along the small town. They spot a car with out of town plates and decided to pull it over. The sheriff says "Where you from boy?" The man says Chicago. Sheriff says, "Don't lie to me son I saw them Illinois tags."....well what do you think son, I cain't read......rotflmao
How to tell if you are haunted by a trailer ghost:
1. A can of Skoal mysteriously floats through the air.
2. Blood drips out of your simulated wood paneling.
3. The eyes on the velvet Elvis painting move.
4. The room is spinning, and you're not even drunk yet.
5. That car in your front yard isn't on blocks -- it's levitating by itself.
6. Your dog, Bo, gets sucked into the TV set, and he's blocking your view of rasslin'.....git out my way dog....I cain't see what's happenin'
7. That mysterious scratching below the floorboards? The Telltale Raccoon.
8. The chain the ghost rattles is attached to his wallet.
9. You feel an eerie presence every time "Freebird" plays on the radio.
10. The trailer is shaking, but theres no tornado in sight
11. Your Dale Earndhart bed sheets have eyeholes cut in them.
12. The ghost is completely invisible except for the tobacco juice running down his chin.
13. Mysterious footsteps seem to be stomping out Achy Breaky Heart.
14. There's a funny howlin' noise comin' from the corn crib--no wait that's Jimmy......Now Jimmy cut that out....I cain't hear the TV
15. You hear strange moaning but only during Shania Twain videos.
16. You're missing four PBR's, and the missus only drinks Old Milwaukee.
17. The lights turn on and off even though you paid the power bill.
18. You hear blood-curdling screams, but both neighbors are still in jail.
19. You get a mysterious phone call that says, "I know what you did last NASCAR race."
20. Instead of saying "boo" the ghost says "boo-ya'll!"
21. The veneer of window grime looks just like Calvin... and he's peeing on YOU!!
22. Instead of naked women, your playing cards, all of a sudden, have pictures of covered bridges on them.
23. The folks on Jenny Jones discuss domestic problems that eerily resemble your own.
24. You get a creepy feelin' and it ain't because Richard Simmons is on TV.
25. You come home one day and it's clean.
Even More You Might Be A Redneck If'n:
You have a rag for a gas cap.
You have a Hefty Bag for a passenger-side window.
You show your boyfriend you really love him by carving his name on your arm.
You've ever had to turn your pickup truck around because of bridge clearance restrictions.
You've ever had to scratch your sister's name out of a message that begins, "For a good time call...."
You ever hit on somebody in a VD clinic.
Well, that will do it for this issue of the Funnies. Hope you all have a great weekend and I will see you back here on Tuesday. For those that are on the weekend Funnies, I'm sorry to say that there won't be any until Mike gets back. I don't even think I'm half prepared to handle that.
Hugs to you all,
Donna
