Fionn and the Scottish Giant

By: Dave (Fij) McMahon
 

Once upon a time...

Fionn MacCumhaill was a giant who lived in a cave high in the mountains of Antrim. His greatest rival was the giant of Scotland, and the two were constantly arguing over this and that. Soon, as is the wont of the Irish, it developed into a full scale battle, only the Irish Sea keeping them from tearing hunks out of each other.

They yelled and roared across the channel which separated them until they were hoarse, their voices booming like thunder. Fionn, in his frustration, scooped a great sod of earth from the middle of Ulster and cast it toward the Scottish giant but he both misjudged the distance and got his aim a little awry, so it ended up in the middle of the sea.

(The sod became the Isle of Man and the place where it was taken from, Lough Neagh.)

So great was his rage that Fionn decided to make a great causeway to Scotland and slay his tormentor, so taking rocks from the top of the mountains where he lived, he cast them into the sea.

(Hence his mountain home became the Antrim Plateau and the Giant's Causeway was formed.)

One day, as he rested from his labours, he glanced out of his cave and spied the Scottish giant as he leaped across the sea, landing on the causeway he was building. Now Fionn may have been arrogant, but he was not stupid. He knew that *he* could not have made that leap. He must have misjudged the size of his Scottish rival and he was now in big trouble.

He searched and searched for a place to hide, but he was now living on a plateau, and there was nowhere big enough for him to hide, and the Scottish giant was coming closer, and looking bigger all the time.

Thinking fast, Fionn grabbed the sheets from his bed and wrapped them round himself as he would have a baby, and leaped into the bed, jamming his thumb firmly in his mouth.

The Scottish giant entered Fionn's cave with a face like thunder and spied Fionn lying there. After a brief moment a look of sheer terror overtook his face and he ran off crying 'By all the Gods, if that's the size of the baby, I never want to meet his Da (Father).'