From: Ronin | Posted: 2/1/2001 8:23:36 PM | Mark for Moderation

Ronin: Hey, Cernd. *points* Bodhi's got a hidden stash of doggy biscuits in her
underwear. Why don't you--
Cernd: GrrrrRRR WOOF! WOOF WOOF WOOF! *charges at Bodhi*
Bodhi: AIIEEEEEEEEE! *getting torn to shreds*
Ronin: Yahahahahaaaaaa! Take THAT, you super-freaky, ultra-creepy vampire-lady! (I
never did like Bodhi! Hah!!!)
---
Be wise. Economize.
Use toilet paper twice.

From: Harlequin | Posted: 2/2/2001 5:17:03 PM | Mark for Moderation

''Place one forrr the funniest way to dispatch an ultra evil vampire
lady.......Rrrrrroooooooooooonnnniiiiiiiiiiiiiiin''
*crowd goes HOOORAY*
so let me now ''attach'' this award on your chest....
*gets out hammer and nails*
hey! why do u run away?

---
If i were you i would wish i could be me, but then i would be you.

From: Ronin | Posted: 2/4/2001 12:49:10 AM | Mark for Moderation

*comes back with a suit of extra-strength plate mail*

Okay, you can attach my award now! *combs her hair and glances at a pocket mirror*
How do I look? Should I do a little speech?

*Meanwhile, Cernd enters...*

Cernd: Grrrrr! No doggy biscuits!!!
Ronin: You didn't find them? Gee. Maybe she's hidden them in her chest cavity. You'll
have to claw it open and dig around.

*Cernd walks off.*

Ronin: Hey, wait, wait, wait! *chases after Cernd*
Cernd: Grrrrr, what is it?
Ronin: *hands Cernd a wooden stake* Stick this through her chest when you're done
digging.
Cernd: Sure. *takes the stake, then pauses* But first.....
Ronin: What?

*Cernd lies down on the ground and rolls over*

Cernd: I'm collecting my tummy rub!
Ronin: DARN!!! Not now, Cernd! You gotta finish off that vampire, quick!
Cernd: *folds his arms defiantly* I'm not staking anyone until I've collected my tummy
rub. And staking vampires is messy; you'd better be ready to clean up my fur when I'm
done. Blood isn't exactly the easiest thing to clean up--
Ronin: Fine, fine! Dang it!!! *scratches Cernd's tummy*
Cernd: ........... *grunting contentedly*

*Just then, Bodhi walks in with 90% of her clothes torn to shreds.*

Bodhi: WHERE'S THAT PERVERTED WEREWOLF... *sees Cernd* AH-
HAAAAAH!!!
Ronin: Gyaaaaah! Cernd, I TOLD you to--
Bodhi: *suddenly rushes up to Cernd and snuggles up against him* So, how about it,
wolf-boy? *in a sexy voice* Wanna take it..... further?
Cernd: Guh... gah... bwah... daaaah........
Bodhi: It's been a while since I've had a REAL man to--
Cernd: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! *rushes off, dropping the stake
in panic and leaving Ronin alone with Bodhi*
Ronin: ....... *sweatdrop*
Bodhi: *intimidatingly* And what do _you_ have to say for yourself, little mortal?
*smiles evilly*
Ronin: *with her hands behind her back like a schoolkid sent to stand in the corner*
Um........ your hooters are showing?
Bodhi: *looks down at her chest* Hah. Don't you think I know that?
Ronin: All the better to STAKE you with! *brings her hands out from behind her back
and drives the stake into Bodhi's bare chest*
Bodhi: GACK! *dies*
Ronin: Arrrrrgh! I've got blood all over my plate mail! That's _not_ gonna look good...
better clean up before I do my victory speech... *starts to exit*

*Cernd pokes his head through the doorway.*

Cernd: Is it..... is th-that thing...
Ronin: Dead? Oh, yeah. Definitely.
Cernd: Did you find any doggy biscuits?
Ronin: Nope. She must've run out of them.
Cernd: *shrugs* Oh well. *walks up to Ronin* Doesn't matter. At least I've always got
you.....
Ronin: *Gasp!* H-huh? Really??? Oh, Cernd, that's the sweetest thing you've ever--
Cernd: *lies on the ground and rolls over* ...... to rub my tummy!
Ronin: .... DAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNGGGG!!!
---
Be wise. Economize.
Use toilet paper twice.

From: Harlequin | Posted: 2/4/2001 6:10:13 PM | Mark for Moderation

Ok let's get this done...
*raises hammer and nail*
ANd the WInner is Ronin from....er.....errrrrr......
*sweatdrop*
*uncomfortable silence*
errrrrrr
yeah were are you from?
else you cant possibly get this great award...
---
If i were you i would wish i could be me, but then i would be you.

From: Ronin | Posted: 2/6/2001 4:00:24 PM | Mark for Moderation

I, Fox ''Ronin'' Bautista of Xavierville, Philippines, do solemnly accept this award.
*strides forward with her freshly cleaned plate mail*

Irenicus: *barges in* Hey!!! You killed my sister, you @#$%^& little brat!!!
Ronin: *sweatdrop* ....... Excuse me. *runs off*

From: Harlequin | Posted: 2/7/2001 10:07:19 AM | Mark for Moderation

*Later...*

Ronin: and then you have to put the eggs into the pan.....
Irenicus: together with the onions or after?
Cernd: HEY the story CONTINUES!!!
Ronin: ohhhh *sad face* (with sweatdrop)
Irenicus: just write it down and give it me later.....
but now... I WILL KILL YOU U MISERABLE MORTAL!
*prepares a power word: death*
*mumble....mumble......mumble*
Ronin: sorry.....
Irenicus: Wha?!?...oooooouuuuuuuuuuch
*the camera is behind Itrenicus back and you can clearkly see the foot print below
Ronin's plate boots which are ramed between.....exactly, THERE.......that hurts, be sure....
*Ronin swirls around 180 degrees and leaves the room rather unplanned......other might
say she fled but true followers wouldn't even think about thinking that*
Irenicus(high pitched): I will get you!
*shakes his fist while holding his groin*
Bodhi!! After her!!
i will follow later.....uuuhhhhhhhh

.....t.b.c
---
If i were you i would wish i could be me, but then i would be you.

From: Ronin | Posted: 2/7/2001 8:17:57 PM | Mark for Moderation

Ronin: Your dear sis can't help ya, I'm afraid. I made..... arrangements to make sure that
she wouldn't bother people again.
Bodhi: *comes in, with clothes torn off and blood everywhere* Oh really? And what
might those ARRANGEMENTS be?
Ronin: ... YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
Irenicus: Sis?!? What in Faerun.....? I thought you were.....
Bodhi: *pointing* Well, that little brat over there tried to drive a stake into my heart, but
wound up puncturing one of my lungs instead!
Cernd: *to Ronin* Hmph. Aren't you glad you didn't decide to study medicine? You'd
make a horrible surgeon for sure.
Bodhi: *pointing to Cernd* And YOU........ YOU........ *marches up to Cernd*
Cernd: G-guh-waaaaah....... I-I think I must be g-going...
Irenicus: *noting Bodhi's torn clothes, turns to Cernd* You...?! You did THAT... *gets
infuriated* You shaggy-haired maniac, you are going to pay the ULTIMATE price!
Bodhi: Yeah! Hand him over to me, brother! I'll teach him a... lesson... he won't forget!
*winks at Cernd*
Cernd: No! NOOOOOOO!!!
Irenicus: *didn't see Bodhi winking, unaware of her... uh... true objective* Hmph! As you
wish, sis! *shoves Cernd over to Bodhi*
Cernd: GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! *faints*
Ronin: Hey! You leave Cernd out of this! _I_ was the one who told him to--
Irenicus/Bodhi: *GASP!!!*
Bodhi: You...... you mean.......
Irenicus: YOU asked him to tear off Bodhi's clothes?
Ronin: Yes, I did! *suddenly realizes that she's made herself sound like some total
pervert* Um..... that is, well....... um.... *trying to figure out how to explain to Irenicus
that she just wanted his sister DEAD* 'cause, you see, I just wanted to--
Irenicus: I THINK WE'VE ALL HEARD ENOUGH, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!
Ronin: It's not like THAT!!!
Bodhi: Oh, SUUUUUURE, it's not! Didn't you have that ridiculously HUGE grin on your
face when you told me ''Your hooters are showing''?!
Ronin: *was indeed grinning, but only because Bodhi's chest area was open to attack*
Yes, but...
Bodhi: Well, that's quite enough evidence to convict you!!!
Irenicus: That settles it! Come along with us, young fool, and we shall decide your
punishment! *casts Hold Person on Ronin and drags her out of the room with Bodhi* ...
Oh, and we'd better get you some fresh clothes, Bodhi...
Bodhi: Hmph! Young people these days!

(To be continued!)
---
Be wise. Economize.
Use toilet paper twice.

From: Harlequin | Posted: 2/8/2001 12:12:11 PM | Mark for Moderation

Irenicus:*dimension door*
Bodhi:dimension door*
Ronin and Cernd:*dimension door*

*mind boggling fast camera sweep to a lone Fortress on a single island somewehre in the
middle of Nowhere....*

Irenicus:So you still want this wolfboy?
Bodhi:yeah, he shall pay his deeds.
Irenicus: OK meanwhile i shall probe this lil pervert *sadistic glance at Ronin*
Mabye there are some corners of her mind i didnt came to
maybe theres some interesting left
but i doubt so
i assume she will be dead in a week or so....
*mysterious voice out of nowhere*:
As long as i guard the Land no innocent maiden shall be punished by a cruel old magster!
*a rose slices through the air, piercing the floor before
Irenicus*

Irenicus/Bodhi/Cernd/Ronin: WHA.....?!?!?!?!
It's YOU?!?!?!?!

*still mysterious voice out of nowhere*: Yes! It is ME.....
end of this part
SO turn on your Modem when it says again next week:
''Ronin, the glorious Hero in places never before a man has put his foot featuring:
Anomen, the Homodin
Cernd the pelvis (?!?)
Irenicus, the stereotype god like mage with bad intents
Bodhi, the sister of Irenicus the stereotype god like mage with bad intents
and last AND least:
Harlequin, the never seen actor!
*clapclapclap*

*advertisements follow*

---
If i were you i would wish i could be me, but then i would be you.

From: Ronin | Posted: 2/8/2001 7:46:06 PM | Mark for Moderation

Yoshimo: Come to Yoshi's Sushi Bar for the best exotic fish dishes! Try our special
Sahuagin Fin and Tuna Roll--
Korgan: *bumps Yoshi off the set* Arrr, bleedin' dirtbag! I booked this spot first! *smiles
at the camera, a big, cheesy smile showing all his teeth* Hello, everyone! *pleasantly*
Are bad breath and tooth decay bothering you? ... Well, suffer no more! *music plays...
''ta-da-daaaan!'' ... as Korgan brings out a bottle of mouthwash* Korgan's Minty-Fresh
Mouthsaver will solve all o' yer--
Yoshi: *charges at Korgan and rams him off the set* I do believe this is MY spot...
Korgan: Oh, yeah?! *opens bottle of Minty-Fresh Mouthsaver and flings it at Yoshi's
face*
Yoshi: *blinded by mouthwash* Arrrrrrggghhhh!!! *starts feeling around for anything he
can use as a weapon... his grip finds something...... it's...... a sushi roll!?!* You'll pay for
that, shorty!!! *smashes sushi into Korgan's face... some of it winds up in his mouth and
he swallows it by accident*
Korgan: AAAAAAAAAGHHHHH! Gyarrr! Shrimp! I'm allergic to shrimp!
Yarrrrrrrrrgghhhh! *Korgan starts breaking out in a super-itchy rash and scratches
himself all over... including the places where it's, um, rude to scratch in public*
Cameraman: Cut! CUT!!! Korgan, what do you think you're doing?!? You wanna get
censored?!? There are kids watching this program, for heaven's sake!
Korgan: *scratching his... well, you-know-what* Don't blame me, ya bloody oaf!
Grrrrrrr! *scratching away*

*A disgusted director walks onto the set and drags Korgan and Yoshi away.*

Director: Okay, who's next?
---
Be wise. Economize.
Use toilet paper twice.

From: Walker Boh | Posted: 2/9/2001 2:01:38 AM | Mark for Moderation

Director: ''lights, camera, action!''

Minsc: (Holding a 1 liter can of blue paint and a paintbush against a half painted wall)
''Hey ho fellows! Do you have problems with fading paint?
Worry no more! Minsc and Boo introduce the newest,never fading paint in all of Faerun!
The Boo Blue Pastel paint!

Anomen: (In his working overalls and headcap)'' It's great, you see this building (showing
Alibakar's Estate in the background) here in Trademeet was painted the other day and
after yesterday's mighty storm, the paint is still intact and shining blue!''

Minsc: ''It's a super quick drying paint! Do you see this tattoo on my face? This is Boo
Blue Pastel Paint and it's been here since I was young. Right Viconia?'' (Viconia grins
and nods in the background).

Anomen:(Now showing some armors,boots,belts,maces,swords(?),staves,helms,etc all in
blue color) ''And you can use Boo Blue Pastel Paint with almost anything,from weapons
to armors to boots and belts...and even with these...(stripping off his overalls and showing
a two piece blue colored lace bra and panty)

Viconia: Whaaa???!!! That's my blue pair of undies! By Shar! I will whip you hard when
I get my hands on you...you pervert! Oloth flynn djal!(charges at Anomen)

Anomen: Gyahhh! Vic, I just used it for this commercial and will return it to your drawer
later...Minsc, stop her!

Minsc: This is fun! Yeah hehehe! Right Boo?
Boo: Squeak!!!

Director: CUT!!!

From: Harlequin | Posted: 2/9/2001 9:22:41 AM | Mark for Moderation

Director: we errr apologize for this inconvinience and we will now bring you some
entertainment!

*dressed up as a clown, an adamantine golem enters the show*
Golem: heehee
me verry funny.....
*drops himself to the ground*
Golem: hohohohohohoho
*puts a fork on the floor*
*takesa step into the fork and....*
*clash....the forks broken*
GOlem: ooops!
verrry funnny thing failed....aga'n....
me is verry saaad abooouuut thaaat
*runs away crying*
t.b.c
---
If i were you i would wish i could be me, but then i would be you.

From: Ronin | Posted: 2/11/2001 5:45:42 PM | Mark for Moderation

Director: *sighs* Okay, okay, bad choice..... Send in the next clown.

*No clown shows up. The director, puzzled, scratches his head and looks around the
studio.*

Director: Where'd that clown go?
Cameraman: Um... I think he's over there *points* getting killed...
Director: WHAT?!?

*The clown, a mind-flayer, is in a corner of the studio trying to fight off a horde of
Githyanki.*

Director: Oh, darn. *turns to his assistant* Well, send in the substitute.
Production assistant: *sweatdrop* Gack...
Director: You got a problem with that?!
Production assistant: Oh, n-no, sir! It's fine! J-... j-just..... f-f-f-fine..... *walks off*
Director: And tell him to be quick about it!

*The production assistant exits the room for a moment and returns, running as if his life
depends on it. Behind him is a mysterious robed figure.*

Production assistant: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!
????: You insolent fool of a monkey! You dare to disturb my personal study? *throws
some of his study material at the assistant's head*
Cameraman: *looking at study material* .............

*The ''material'', rather than being a magical tome or arcane scroll, turns out to be a thick
Summer Special volume of Playboy.*

????: I shall personally fry your worthless backside in a meteor shower and-- *steps onto
the set and sees all the cameras* Ooooh, I'm on TV?
Director: *getting impatient* Yes, yes, you're on TV, Edwin. Now go and do something
entertaining!
Edwin: Ooooooh! *smiles happily* Yes, this will be fun. Hello, children! *waves at the
cameras* Would you like to see some magic tricks? Yes? Excellent! Now... here is a trick
to amaze you and fill you with wonder at the mighty and powerful Edwin! ... *reaches
into his robes, pulls out a scroll, unrolls it* Here in this scroll... *holds the unrolled scroll
in front of the camera*
Director: *GASP!!!*
Cameraman: Gyaaaah!
Production assistant: Ooooooooh!
Edwin: Yes, you have every reason to be amazed! This is one of my personal favorite
tricks--
Director: EDWIN!!!
Edwin: Yes, yes, I know, I am astoundingly gifted and more handsome than Brad Pitt...
Director/Cameraman: EDWIN!!!!!
Edwin: You see? The trick has not yet begun but people are screaming my name like
lovestruck girls at a--
Director: EDWIN!!! *pointing* THE SCROLL!!!
Edwin: Eh? What about the scroll?
Director: *slaps himself on the forehead*

*The piece of paper that Edwin is proudly holding in front of the cameras is not a
magical scroll, but a centerfold from his Playboy Summer Special.*

Production assistant: *pointing to centerfold* Hey, isn't that......?
Edwin: *looking at centerfold* Why, yes, it is!
Director: Gaaaaaah!!! Somebody, PLEASE stop the insanity!!!

*Viconia appears on the set, chasing Anomen, who's wearing blue ladies' underwear
(which, as we all remember, was stolen from Viconia's cabinet).*

Viconia: You little @#$*&^%, I'm going to flay you to pieces!
Anomen: *running* Can't you just whip me instead?
Viconia: @#*$&%^%@$#)#*$&^@&*^!!!

(Who is the woman on the Playboy centerfold? What will the director do with Edwin?
Will Viconia catch Anomen? Will the show be forever banned due to its, errr,
inappropriate content? To be continued...)
---
Be wise. Economize.
Use toilet paper twice.

From: Karrde | Posted: 2/12/2001 9:09:12 AM | Mark for Moderation

My guesses for the Mystery Centerfold Girl:

1. Viconia-- elves (espcially Drow) aren't uptight about their bodies anyway

2. Nalia-- which is why no-one's managed to find her (we DO remember what the
original thread was about, don't we?)

3. Edwina-- hey, the money was good.

4. Bodhi-- her hooters were showing anyway

5. Faldorn-- trying to prove she ISN'T a man (now where did that message thread go off
to?)

6. Mazzy-- in an attempt to dispell misconceptions and stereotypes about halfling women
(and just because I felt it would be totally out of character)

7. Joyce Jimenez (reference totally lost on non-Filipinos)-- but I want her there dammit!

From: Karrde | Posted: 2/12/2001 9:14:04 AM | Mark for Moderation

Oh, and how could I forget... the mystery centerfold is... Anomen in blue lingerie!

From: Harlequin | Posted: 2/12/2001 6:09:25 PM | Mark for Moderation

*Viconia and Anomen vanish into the back of the show...
Edwin stands petrified in front
thinking:Why did this incompetent thug of this useless circus had to pull ME outta my
holy meditation? grrr....
he WILL pay for this daring...

circus director: ohhhhh nooooo
and that at prime time....
how terrible....

clerk: oh what a fine nice woman on that centerfold....

As suddenly:
Faldorn and Yoshimo enter the stage....
Yoshimo jumps over to Edwin and whispers:
Ok guy...if u wanna die do NOT tell me where you have hidden your nether scroll....
*Faldorn looks nervoulsy around...still in a uncomfortable female plate...*
Faldorn:faster yoshi.....i have again this urge to whistle after good looking women.....and
do you have one of your sushi rolls?
*the director has now reached the state of a complete nervous breakdown...as the
adamantine golem again enters....
AG: HOHOHOHO ME verrry funnnyyyy HOHOHOHO

t.b.c.

---
If i were you i would wish i could be me, but then i would be you.

From: deatman | Posted: 2/12/2001 10:49:02 PM | Mark for Moderation

Irenicus: * Comes in on the stage reading a speech* Well children, I now am going to
give you fifty ways to try your own conqu-
Minsc: *Walks in dancing around with maracas* la la la la lal la la!
Irenicus: *Obviously angry* Oh you... big oaf I shall have your hide for interrupt-
Minsc: *Still dancing* Oh, stop whining you evil mange man sir!
Irenicus: *Red in the face* That's it! OH... I am OH I'm... going to-
Yoshimo: *Working at his sushi bar* Oh shut up you spoilsport! *Throws sushi in
Irenicus' eye*
Irenicus: *Grabbing his eye* GAHHHHHHHH! DAMN YOU FOOL! I WASN'T
SUPOSED TO GET SUSHI IN THAT EYE!
Minsc: *Still dancing*
Yoshimo: HAHAHA!
Irenicus: *Eye Swells to size of baseball and he drops down on the ground and stops
moving*
Yoshimo: Uhhhhhhhhhhhh
Minsc: *Still dancing*

From: Little Hamster | Posted: 2/14/2001 8:01:38 PM | Mark for Moderation

Director gives up on controlling the casts and calls off shooting for the day. Viconia and
Anomen are still chasing each other around the studio, Viconia now has the blue bra in
her hand. The director picked up the playboy centrefold that Edwin has left on the floor.

Director: Isn't she pretty?
Yoshimo *very interested*: Wow, she's gorgeous.
All the guys, except Anomen (still being chased by Viconia) and Cernd (having has
tummy rubbed by Ronin), come and look at the centrefold.
Minsc: I don't believe Edwina looks so gorgeous.
Boo: Squeak, squeak (Remeber Salvanas in the Copper Coronet, he is willing to suffer a
few magic missiles just so he can talk to the beautiful Edwina).
Minsc: Boo is always right.

Mazzy takes a look and says disgustingly: Only Edwin will be so egocentric as to stare at
his own picture all day long.

Edwin, after looking everywhere for his centrefold backstage, cames in at this moment
and finds everyone staring at his picture.
Edwin: You jerks, stop looking at my Edwina. I'll give you all bananas. *magic missiles
for everyone*

Boo: squeak, squeak (it hurts)
Minsc: Rangers and hamsters everywhere, get hurt. *ouch*

From: Ronin | Posted: 2/15/2001 6:29:13 AM | Mark for Moderation

Production assistant: Hey, wait! Who's that on the OTHER side of the centerfold?
Director: OUCH!!! *gets hit with a magic missile in the butt before looking at the
centerfold* Huh...? Hey...... HEY! BWAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAH!
AHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!

*Edwin, distracted by the extremely loud laughter, stops firing magic missiles.*

Edwin: Eh?
Boo: Squeak squeaaak! (translation: What's so funny?!?)
Production assistant: *holds up the reverse side of the centerfold for EVERYONE to see*
HAVE A LOOK AT THIS, EVERYBODY!!!
Everyone (even Cernd, Ronin, Viconia and Anomen): ......... *turns to look*

*The other centerfold model is none other than...... Anomen in blue lingerie!* (as Karrde
pointed out earlier)

Everyone (except Anomen): WAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!
Boo: SQUEEAAAAAAAAAAAKKK!!! (YAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAAAA!)
Edwin: *almost rolling on the floor laughing* Your... HEHEEEE! ... your dark secret is
out...... HEEHEEHEEEEE! ... Mr. Righteous Priest of the Most Radiant Heart!

From: Ronin | Posted: 2/20/2001 6:47:25 PM | Mark for Moderation

Bodhi: *pokes her head into the room and sees all the chaos* Yeesh... looks like they're
having one heck of a commercial break!
Edwin: *holding his centerfold* Woo-hoo! Hey, Anomen! Maybe you should sign a
lifetime contract with Athkatla Playboy, eh? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Minsc: Cover your eyes, Boo! *shields Boo's eyes from the centerfold* This is not a sight
for good, strong-hearted heroes of virtue!
Director: WAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAAAAAAHAHA-- *glances at his watch*
Hey!!! Commercial time is over! Everybody, get back to your places!
Yoshi: Yikes! *wheels his sushi cart away from the set*
Minsc: Okay! *rushes to the side, still holding his maracas* La la la la la la la... *dancing
as he moves forward*
Director: Bodhi, get back in here!
Bodhi: *goes back into the studio*
Director: Irenicus, ready?
Irenicus: Drat. I wanted to do _my_ commercial.
Director: Ronin?
Ronin: Yah.
Director: And where's the cameraman?

*Silence.*

Director: Um... my assistant?

*No sign of him either.*

Director: C'mon! We can't start until the crew's all here!
Ronin: Um... Mr. Director... *tapping him on the shoulder*
Director: What?!
Ronin: You called off shooting for the day, remember? Your cameraman and assistant
went home.
Director: *sweatdrop* Oh.
Edwin: *singing* Aaanomen's wearing ladies' uuunderweeaar... la la la...
Anomen: Silence, conjurer! *starts attacking Edwin with the Flail of Ages*
Edwin: Gyah! *runs off so he can get some distance to cast a spell*

*Anomen starts chasing Edwin around the building.*

Director: Well, I might as well go on home as well. Until tomorrow's filming, you guys
are free to go and do what you want.
Bodhi: Woo-hoo!
Irenicus: Hmph, fair enough. *goes off to his lab*
Cernd: *shifts back to human form* I'd better go and cook dinner. How about some tofu
and bean spr--
Yoshi: No! No no no no no no NO!!! We're having SUSHI for dinner, and that's the end
of that!

*Anomen is still chasing Edwin.*

Edwin: Have you ever tried wearing a bikini? I think you would look wonderful in one!
A pink one with yellow floral print! I saw one at K-Mart!
Anomen: *stops chasing him* Hmmmm...... you know, that sounds like a good idea.
Edwin: *Whew!*
Ronin: Gee, what should I do now?

(To be continued...)
---
Be wise. Economize.
Use toilet paper twice.

From: Ronin | Posted: 2/24/2001 7:57:42 AM | Mark for Moderation

*A few hours later, at K-Mart...*

Anomen: Hmm... yes, Edwin was right about the pink bikini... but I think I like this light
purple one with the red dots much better... *sigh* So many to choose from, so little
time... *picks up a bright yellow one with printed red and pink hearts*

*Just then, guess who comes along*

Sir Ryan Trawl: Ah, young Anomen! Good to see you again. What brings you here this
fine evening?
Anomen: Gyaaaah!!! I..... I... I'm... clothes shopping, s-sir...

*Sir Ryan raises an eyebrow at the bikini in Anomen's hand. His eyes grow wide.*

Anomen: *sweatdrop* ... That is, I happen to be shopping for my, er..... for my
girlfriend... yes, my girlfriend... I thought one of these bikinis would suit her...
Sir Ryan: Whew. *exhales in relief* Of course. For your girlfriend. For a while, I thought
you were developing an... unhealthy fixation with ladies' clothing.
Anomen: Errrr.....
Sir Ryan: *clapping a friendly hand on Anomen's shoulder* So, who's the lucky lady,
hmm?
Anomen: Errrrr...... uh...... uhhhhhhhh... *looks around hurriedly, then turns to the nearest
lady and grabs her* Here! This is the, uhhhh, the love of my life....... *whispers to the
lady* (Pleeeease, just play along or I'm in BIIIIIG trouble!!!)
Sir Ryan: *to the lady* How do you do, my Lady?
Mystery girl: *playing along* Fine, thank you, kind sir.
Sir Ryan: I see that you've attracted the affections of Sir Anomen here. *gestures to
Anomen, who replies with a forced, cheesy smile* May I ask your name?
Mystery girl: *turns to Anomen for just an instant and smiles... very mischievously... and
Anomen is shocked because he just realized who he grabbed* Certainly, sir. My name
is.....

(Who's the mystery girl? Will she play along with the whole thing, or will she try to get
Anomen in trouble? The next person to continue the tale gets to decide!)
---
Be wise. Economize.
Use toilet paper twice.

---
From: Vega Knight | Posted: 2/27/2001 12:59:25 PM | Mark for Moderation

My name is(drum running) Nalia! I'm so in love with sir Anomen! I love him love him
love him! I just can't resist a shining Knight that fight s for good and justice! Helps those
in need! I wanna marry him and bear his children and ..bla bla bla bla bla bla bla (then
whispering in Anomen's ear: and now sweetheart, you are going to sign me a blood
contract to promise to marry me and stop this $%/%%/?$% underwear obsession, or I'll
tell your superior you lied right now!):p you're traped lover boy ;) (what? I am tired of
being the only girl who can't get a boyfriend! that's so lame! and besides that, I learned
that he was quite good at backstabbing!:p) then running happily lifting anomen in the air
by the hand:
Nalia: Yeah, let's go shoping! and next you will come with me to a dinner with my aunt,
and next we will go to salvatore land, I always wanted to go in the love tunnel with my
boyfriend:p and then we'll go to help those lowly commoners in need! that will be so
fun!:p

Anomen:(sweat drop) well, I'll supose I have no choice.(then thinking to himself:I
wonder what type of underwear she wears? would it fit me?:p)
to be continued!
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Dorithori iwa na sasena•/Never let anyone get in your way!