Johnny Cochran was duck hunting in Texas recently, when he attempted
to cross a fence into a field to retrieve a duck he had shot. A farmer
suddenly pulled up in his pickup truck, jumped out, and asked Cochran
what he was doing on his property.
"Retrieving this duck I just shot", he replied.
"That duck is on my side of the fence, so now it's mine," replied the
farmer.
Cochran asked the farmer if he recognized who he was talking to.
"No," replied the farmer, "I don't know, and I don't care."
"I am Johnny Cochran, famous lawyer from Los Angeles", came the reply.
"I am the lawyer that got O.J. Simpson off. I'm the reason he is a
free man today. And if you don't let me get that duck, I can sue you
for your farm, your truck, and everything else you own. I'll leave you
penniless on the street."
"Well," said the farmer, "In Texas the only law we go by is the 'Three
Kicks' law."
"Never heard of it", said Johnny.
The farmer said, "I get to kick you three times, and if you make it
back to your feet and are able to kick me back three times, that duck
is yours."
Cochran thought this over. He grew up in a tough neighborhood and
figured he could take this old farmer. "Fair enough", he said.
So the farmer kicked Johnny violently in the groin. As he was doubling
over, the farmer kicked him in the face, and when he hit the ground,
he kicked him hard in the ribs. After several moments, Johnny slowly
made it back to his feet.
"All right, now it's my turn", said Johnny.
"Aw, forget it", said the farmer. "You can have the duck."