Actual crimes committed by actual criminals:
Dumb Crooks
Actual crimes committed by
actual criminals:
- Two Kentucky men tried to pull off the front of a
cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of
their pickup truck. The front panel of the machine was so secure
that instead they pulled off the bumper of their truck. Scared,
they fled the scene and drove home, leaving the chain attached to
the machine...with their bumper still attached to the
chain...with their vehicle's license plate still attached to the
bumper.- A man convicted
of robbery in Texas worked out a deal to pay $9,600 in damages
rather than serve a prison sentence. For payment he provided the
court with a check--a stolen check with a forged signature. He
got 10 years. -
A man went into a drugstore, pulled a gun, announced a robbery,
and pulled a Hefty trash-bag face mask over his head. Too late he
realized that he'd forgotten to cut eyeholes in the mask. While
sprinting blindly to the door, he fell down and was captured.-
A man successfully broke into a bank after hours and stole--are
you ready for this?--the bank's video camera...while it was
recording...remotely. In other words, he got a camera only. The
videotape of himself stealing the camera was still in the
recorder located elsewhere in the bank.-
A man successfully broke into a bank's basement through a street
level window, cutting himself up pretty badly in the process. He
then realized that he couldn't get to the money from where he
was, and he couldn't climb back out the window through which he
had entered. On top of that he was bleeding from all his cuts. So
he located a phone and dialed 911 for help. -
A man walked into a convenience store, put a $20 bill on the
counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash
drawer, the man pulled a gun and demanded all the cash in the
register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man grabbed the
cash from the clerk and fled- leaving the $20 bill on the
counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer? Fifteen
dollars. - In San
Francisco a man walked into a downtown Bank of America and wrote,
"This is a stickup. Put all your many in this bag."
While standing in line waiting to give his note to the teller, he
began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might
call the police before he reached the teller window. So he left
the Bank of America and crossed the street to Wells Fargo. After
waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells
Fargo teller. She read it and, guessing from his spelling errors
that he was not the brightest bank robber in the world, told him
that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written
on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have
to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of
America. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said okay and left
the Wells Fargo Bank. The Wells Fargo teller then called the
police, who arrested him a few minutes later as he was waiting in
line back at the Bank of America.
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