WAYS TO BE MORE ANNOYING!

(In no particular order)

1. Consistently refer to everyone as "mortal"

2. Wear alarming combinations of pink and green, and comment about other peoples fashion sense as "taseless".

3. Step on the heels of the person walking in front of you, and when they turn around, ask them if they "want a piece of you". If they say yes, say kick them in the Bollocks and run.

4. Every time you see a certain person, walk up to them, and say, "Ah, we meet again" and then laugh evilly.

5. Force everyone who wants to enter your room to take off their shoes first, to "prevent contamination".

6. Hang around tourist attractions, trying to get into other people's photos, and when you do, give them your address, and ask them to send you a copy.

7. Close your eyes and start snoring whenever someone try's to talk to you.

8. When you are on a bus, sit at the front, and constantly ask the driver "are we there yet"

9. If you see an advert on TV that gives you a phone number to call, call it, and pretend you are either an old woman, who's deaf, or that you are being eaten by a dog.

10. When at school or work, run around with your hands on your elbows, and frantically ask people to take of your straight jacket before "they" come back.

11. Gate crash other people's weddings, sit at the back, and when the vicar asks if there are any objections get up and say "The groom is already married… TO ME" and then run out.

12. Walk through a park, and when you see someone, walk in their way, and when they try to go around you, move the same way, keep this going for as long as you can, but when they finally get past you say "Look where your going next time!"

13. Next time you are in a crowded town centre, stop someone and say "Nice trousers. Let me have them"

14. End EVERY sentence with "In accordance with the prophecy"