SPACE BARON in the Last Zucchini

When Space Baron came down the stairs Brian was standing at the stove snickering to himself. When he turned around Space Baron saw the reason Brian was laughing, he was wearing one of those aprons with the tits on the front. What Space Baron didn't know was that he had been wearing it since 5:00 that morning and hadn't stopped giggling for three hours.

"There you go," said Brian as he slid Space Baron's breakfast onto a plate, "Bacon, eggs and fried tomatoes."

"BABAAA!" went the danger music.

Space Baron and Brian looked around to see what the ominous music meant. There was nothing so they continued about their business. Brian continued giggling under his breath as he prepared his own breakfast.

"That was delicious Brian," said Space Baron before removing the pan from the heat and pushing Brian onto the gas flame until his plastic breasts caught fire, "And stop f&$king giggling!!!!!!!" he screamed as Brian stood in a trance repeating "Stop, drop, roll" while the flames flared in front of his face. But Space baron was feeling forgiving that morning and bashed Brian over the head with a frying pan to break the trance. Brian then ran around screaming until he fell into the inground indoor pool Space Baron had had installed in the living room the night before. Despite Space Baron's charitable mood he couldn't resist throwing the toaster into the pool to give Brian a jovial buzz.

As Brian hauled himself out of the pool, singed an twitching, he said "I'm just going to do some gardening in the vegetable patch."

Space Baron ignored him and continued reading the paper so Brian snuck upstairs to get another novelty apron. Brian found the tit aprons so amusing that he had bought 6000 of them on his credit card, then to pay off his increasing debt he had offered to store some nuclear waste in the back yard. When it was delivered he had stood deliberating whether to put it next to the Iguana enclosure or the vegetable patch. In the end he had chosen to put it next to the iguana. When the iguana mutated to become Godzilla Brian used the royalties to pay for the 7 million musical birthday cards he had bought. But Space Baron had been suspicious so he moved the waste, which was now leaking, next to the vegetable patch.

And so it was today that he walked into the back garden just as a 10 metre high Capsicum let out a deafening roar and tore loose of it's stalk. "Holy s#%t, thought Brian, I'm gonna be in big trouble."

To find out what happens next, you'll have to watch the movie, if it gets made.