30 THINGS TO DO IN THE ELEVATOR
30 THINGS TO DO IN THE ELEVATOR
1: Blow your nose and offer to show the contenes of your tissue to other passengers.

2: Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "shut up, dammit, all of you shut UP"

3: Whistle the first seven notes of "It�s a Small World" incessantly.

4: Crack open your breifcase or purse, and, while peering inside ask, "Got enough air in there?"

5: Offer name tage to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down

6: Stand silent amd motionless in the corner, facing the wall, whitout getting off.

7: When arrinving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open up by themselvs.

8: Lean over to another passenger and whisper, "Noogie patrole coming!"

9: Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them all to call you Admiral.

10: On the higest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stays open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "pllink" at the bottom.

11: Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce, " I�ve got new socks on!"

12: When at least eight people have boarded, moan from the back, Oh, not now, damn, motion sickness!"

13: Meow occasionally.

14: Bet the other passengers you can fit a quater in your nose.

15: Frown and mutter, "Gotta go, gotta go," then sigh and say "oops!"

16: Show other passenger a wound and ask if it looks infected.

17: Holler "chutes away!" whenever the elevator decends.

18: Walk in with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

19: Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You�re one of them!" and move to the far corner aof the elevator.

20: Burp and say "mmmm...tasty!".

21: Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it

22: When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "Is that your beeper?"

23: Say "Ding!" at each floor.

24: Say "Iwonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

25: Listen to the elevator walls with a stethescope.

26: Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space"

27: Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger, "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"

28: Wear X-ray specs and leer suggestively at another passenger.

29: Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

30: Annonuce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body"


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