The Complete Set Of Blonde Jokes
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1.   Q:   What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
     A:   Gifted!
 
2.   Q:   How do blonde braincells die?
     A:   Alone.
 
3.   Q:   What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
     A:   Pregnant.
 
4.   Q:   How do you brainwash a blonde?
     A:   Give her a douche and shake her upside down.
 
5.   Q:   What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette?
     A:   Artificial intelligence.
 
6.   Q:   How does a blonde part their hair?
     A1:  (Action of scissoring legs apart)
     A2:  By doing the splits.
 
7.   Q:   Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?
     A:   Because they can't even keep two calves together!
 
8.   Q:   What did the blonde's right leg say to the left leg?
     A:   Nothing.  They've never met.
 
9.   Q:   Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
     A:   Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
 
10.  Q:   When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?
     A:   After a dye job.
 
11.  Q:   Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane?
     A1:  She'd just dyed her hair.
     A2:  She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around
          too much.
 
12.  Q:   Why do blondes wear their hair up?
     A:   To catch everything that goes over their heads.
 
13.  Q:   Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
     A:   You can park in the handicap zone.
 
14.  Q:   What was the blonde psychic's greatest achievment?
     A:   An IN-body experience!
 
15.  Q:   Why is a blonde like a turtle?
     A:   They both get fucked up when they're on their back.
 
16.  Q:   What do Darren Millane (Collingwood footballer killed in a
          recent car crash) and a blonde have in common?
     A:   Put either of 'em in a car and their fucked.
 
17.  Q:   What's a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme?
     A:   Humpme Dumpme.
 
18.  Q:   How do you make a blonde's eyes light up?
     A:   Shine a flashlight in their ear.
 
19.  Q:   How do you get a blondes eyes to twinkle?
     A:   Shine a torch in her ears.
 
20.  Q:   Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks?
     A:   It takes too long to retrain them.
 
21.  Q1   How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer?
     A:   There's white-out on the screen.
     Q2:  How can you tell if another blonde's been using the computer?
     A:   There's writing on the white-out.
 
22.  Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a computer?
     A:   You only have to punch information into a computer once.
 
23.  Q:   What do a blonde and your computer have in common?
     A:   You don't know how much either of them mean to you until they go
          down on you.
 
24.  Q:   What did the blonde think of the new computer?
     A:   She didn't like it because she couldn't get channel 9.
 
25.  Q:   Why do blondes wear shoulder pads?
     A:   (With a rocking of the head from side to side) I dunno!
 
26.  Q:   How do you kill a blonde?
     A:   Put spikes in their shoulder pads.
 
27.  Q:   How do blondes pierce their ears?
     A:   They put tacks in their shoulder pads.
 
28.  Q:   Why don't blondes eat Jello?
     A:   They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those
          little packages.
 
29.  Q:   What do you call a blonde with a dollar on the top of their head?
     A:   All you can eat, under a buck.
 
30.  Q:   Why don't blondes eat pickles?
     A:   Because they can't get their head in the jar.
 
31.  Q:   Why don't blondes eat bananas?
     A1:   They can't find the zipper.
A2:     They cant find the pull tab.
 
32.  Q:   Why do blondes wear hoop earrings?
     A:   They have to have some place to rest their ankles.
 
33.  Q:   Why do blondes where big hoop earrings?
     A:   To put their feet through.
 
34.  Q:   What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
     A:   Her ankles.
 
35.  Q:   Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
     A:   Because red means stop.
 
36.  Q:   Why do blondes wear red lipstick?
     A:   Because red means "Stop, wrong hole."
 
37.  Q:   How can you tell if a blonde has been in your refrigerator?
     A:   By the lipstick on your cucumbers.
 
38.  Q:   Why don't blondes use vibrators?
     A:   They chip their teeth.
 
39.  Q:   Why do blondes wear underwear?
     A:   They make good ankle warmers.
 
40.  Q:   What do blondes do for foreplay?
     A:   Remove their underwear.
 
41.  Q:   Why don't blondes in San Francisco wear short black mini skirts?
     A:   Cause their balls show!
 
42.  Q:   What's the mating call of the blonde?
     A:   "I'm *sooo* drunk!"
 
43.  Q:   What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?
     A:   (Screaming) "I said: I'm drunk!"
 
44.  Q: How did the blonde die ice fishing?
     A: She was run over by the zambonis machine.
 
45.  Q:   What's a brunette's mating call?
     A:   Has that blonde gone yet?
     A2:  When is that blonde bitch going to leave!?
A3: "All the blondes have gone home!"
 
46:  Q:   Why do blondes drive BMWs?
     A:   Because they can spell it.
 
47.  Q:   Why do blondes like the GST? (GST -- Goods and Services Tax now in
          effect in Canada)
     A:   Because they can spell it.
 
48.  Q:   What is 74 to a blonde?
     A:   69 plus G.S.T.
 
49.  Q:   Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?
     A:   Toes Go In First.
 
50.  Q:   Why do blondes have TGIF on their shirts?
     A:   Tits Go In Front.
 
51.  Q:   What do you call a brunette with a blonde on either side?
     A:   An interpreter.
 
52.  Q:   What do you call a blonde between two brunettes?
     A:   A mental block.
 
53.  Q:   How do you change a blonde's mind?
     A1:  Blow in her ear.
     A2:  Buy her another beer.
 
54.  Q:   What do you say to a blonde that won't give in?
     A:   "Have another beer."
 
55.  Q:   What do blondes do with their arseholes in the morning?
     A:   Pack their lunch and send them to work.
 
56.  Q:   What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning?
     A1:  Introduces themself.
     A2:  Walks home.
 
57.  Q:   How does a blonde like her eggs in the morning?
     A:   Fertilized.
 
58.  Q:   How does a blonde like her eggs?
     A:   Unfertilized.
 
59.  Q:   What's the first thing a blonde does after sex?
     A:   Opens the car door.
 
60.  Q:   How do blondes turn the light on after sex?
     A:   Kick open the car door.
 
61.  Q:   Why do blondes like tilt steering?
     A:   More head room.
 
62.  Q:   Why do blondes drive cars with sunroofs?
     A:   More leg room.
 
63.  Q:   What is the worst thing about sex with a blonde?
     A:   Bucket seats.
 
64.  Q:   What do blondes say after sex?
     A1:  "Thanks, Guys!"
     A2:  "Are you boys all in the same band?"
     A3:  Do you guys all play for the <team name>?
     A4:  Who were all those guys?
 
65.  Q:   Why is a blonde like a door knob?
     A:   Because everybody gets a turn.
 
66.  Q:   Why is a blonde like railroad tracks?
     A:   Because she's been laid all over the country.
 
67.  Q:   What important question does a blonde ask her mate before having sex?
     A:   Do you want this by the hour, or the flat rate?
 
68.  Q:   Why do blonde girls have trouble achieving orgasm?
     A:   *Who cares?*
 
69.  Q:   Why do blondes have orgasms?
     A:   So they know when to stop having sex!
 
70.  Q:   How do you tell when a blonde reaches orgasm?
     A1:  She drops her nail-file!
     A2:  Who cares?
     A3:  She says, "Next".
     A4:  The next person in the queue taps you on the shoulder.
     A5:  He's had his clothes for about 2 minutes.
     A6:  I mean, who really cares?
     A7:  The batteries have run out.
 
71.  Q:   What does a blonde say when you blow in their ear?
     A:   "Thanks for the refill!"
 
72.  Q:   What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde's ear?
     A:   Data transfer.
 
73.  Q:   Why do blondes use tapons with extra long strings?
     A:   So the crabs can go bungee-jumping.
 
74.  Q:   How can you tell which blonde is the waitress?
     A:   She is the one with the tampon behind her ear, wondering
          what she did with her pencil.
 
75.  Q:   What did the blonde customer say to the buxom waitress (reading her
          nametag) ?
     A:   "'Debbie'...that's cute. What did you name the other one ?"
 
76.  Q:   Why do blondes have more fun?
     A1:  Because they don't know any better.
     A2:  They are easier to keep amused.
 
77.  Q:   How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
     A1:  "What's a lightbulb?"
     A2:  One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
     A3:  Two. One to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call, "Daaady!"
 
78.  Q:   What's a blonde's favourite wine?
     A:   "Daaaddy, I want to go to Miaaami!"
 
79.  Q:   What do you call a basement full of blondes?
     A:   A wine cellar.
 
80.  Q:   Why are there no dumb brunettes?
     A:   Peroxide.
 
81.  Q:   Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes?
     A:   They're doing research on black holes.
 
82.  Q:   What does a peroxide blonde and a 747 have in common?
     A1:  They both have a black box.
     A2:  Both have a cockpit.
 
83.  Q:   What is the difference between a blonde and a 747?
     A:   Not everyone has been in a 747.
 
84.  Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a limousine?
     A:   Not everybody has been in a limo.
 
85.  Q:   What does a blonde say when she gives birth?
     A:   Gee, Are you sure it's mine?
 
86.  Q:   What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
     A:   "Are you sure it's mine?"
 
87.  Q:   What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
     A:   A wind tunnel.
 
88.  Q:   What do you call 15 blondes in a circle?
     A:   A dope ring.
 
89.  Q:   Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, a dumb blonde, and a smart
          blonde are walking down the street when they spot a $10 bill.
          Who picks it up?
     A1:  The dumb blonde! because, there is no such thing as Santa Claus,
          the tooth fairy, or a smart blonde.
     A2:  None of them.  There is no such thing as Santa Claus, the Tooth
          Fairy or a smart blonde and the dumb blonde thought it was a gum
          wrapper.
 
90.  Q:   Why did the blonde scale the glass wall?
     A:   To see what was on the other side.
 
91.  Q:   What do you do when a blonde throes a hand grenade at you?
     A:   Pull the pin and throw it back.
 
92.  Q:   Why do blondes take the pill?
     A:   So they know what day of the week it is.
 
93.  Q:   Why did the blonde stop using the pill?
     A:   Because it kept falling out.
 
94.  Q:   Why did the blonde have a sore navel?
     A:   Because her boyfriend was also blond!
 
95.  Q:   If a blonde and a brunette are tossed off a building, who hits the
          ground first?
     A:   The brunette. The blonde has to stop to ask for directions.
 
96.  Q:   What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimers disease?
     A:   Her IQ goes up!
 
97.  Q:   What's the difference between Indiana and a blonde?
     A:   A blonde has larger hills and deeper valleys.
 
98.  Q:   Whats the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?
     A:   You don't lend the Porsche out to your friend.
 
99.  Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush?
     A:   You don't let your best friend borrow your toothbrush.
 
100. Q:   What is the difference between butter and a blonde?
     A:   Butter is difficult to spread.
 
101. Q:   What is the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
     A1:  You can only get three fingers in a bowling ball.
     A2:  You can't fit the blonde in the bowling ball.
     A3:  There is no difference. They're both round and have
          three holes to poke.
     A4:  You don't eat your bowling ball
 
102. Q:   What do a bowling ball and a blonde have in common?
     A:   Chances are they'll both end up in the gutter.
 
103. Q:   What is the difference between a blonde and "The Titanic"?
     A:   They know how many men went down on "The Titanic".
 
104. Q:   What is the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?
     A:   Bigfoot has been spotted.
 
105. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a telephone?
     A:   It costs 30 cents to use a telephone.
 
106. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a guy?
     A:   The blonde has the higher sperm count.
 
107. Q:   What is the difference between a blonde and the Grand Old Duke of
          York?
     A:   The Grand Old Duke of York only 'had' 10000 men.
 
108. Q:   Why is a washing machine better than a blonde?
     A:   Because you can drop your load in a washing machine, and it
          won't follow you around for a week.
 
109. Q:   What do blondes and cow-pats have in common?
     A:   They both get easier to pick-up with age.
 
110. Q:   What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
     A:   The more you bang it, the looser it gets.
 
111. Q:   What does a blonde and a beer bottle have in common?
     A:   They're both empty from the neck up.
 
112. Q:   What do blondes and spaghetti have in common?
     A:   They both wriggle when you eat them.
 
113. Q:   Why did the deaf blonde sit on a newspaper?
     A:   So she could lip read.
 
114. Q:   What do peroxide blondes and black men have in common?
     A:   They both have black roots.
 
115. Q:   What do you call a blonde with a bag of sugar on her head?
     A:   Sweet Fuck All...
 
116. Q:   How do you drown a blonde?
     A1:  Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool.
     A2:  Don't tell her to swallow.
     A3:  Leave a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.
 
117. Q:   Why did the blonde drown in the pool?
     A:   Someone left a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.
 
118. Q:   Why do blondes have square boobs?
     A:   Because they forgot to take the tissues out of the box.
 
119. Q:   How many blondes does it take to make chocolate-chip cookies?
     A1:  10. One to mix the dough and nine to peel the smarties.
     A2:  Three...one to mix the batter and two to squeeze the rabbit.
A3: Two...one to make batter and one to peel the M&Ms.
 
120. Q:   How do you tell if a blonde did your landscaping?
     A:   The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard.
 
121. Q:   What did the blonde's mom say to her before the blonde's date?
     A:   If you're not in bed by 12, come home.
 
122. Q:   What's the blonde's cheer?
     A:   " I'm blonde, I'm blonde, I'm B.L.O.N....ah, oh well..
          I'm blonde, I'm blonde, yea yea yea..."
 
123. Q:   What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts?
     A:   Change.
 
124. Q:   How does a blonde moonwalk?
     A:   She pulls down her panties and slides her ass along the floor!
 
125. Q:   Why do blondes find it difficult to marry?
     A:   Because you don't have to marry them for sex!
 
126. Q:   What do you get when you cross a blonde and a gorilla?
     A:   Who knows, there is only so much a gorilla can be forced to do.
 
127. Q:   Why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers every month?
     A:   Because it says right on it "good for up to 20 pounds."
 
128. Q:   How did the blonde try to kill the bird?
     A:   She threw it off a cliff.
 
129. Q:   How does a blonde kill a fish?
     A:   She drowns it.
 
130. Q:   Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw
          puzzle in only 6 months?
     A:   Because on the box it said From 2-4 years.
 
131. Q:   What do you say to a blonde with no arms and no legs?
     A:   "Nice tits!"
 
132. Q:   How does a blonde high-5?
     A:   She smacks herself in the forehead.
 
133. Q:   How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
     A:   Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.
 
134. Q:   Why aren't there many blonde gymnasts?
     A:   Because when they do the splits, they stick to the floor.
 
135. Q:   Why do blondes have legs?
     A1:  So they don't get stuck to the ground.
     A2:  To get between the bedroom and the kitchen.
     A3:  So they don't leave trails, like little snails.
 
136. Q:   Why did the blonde go half way to Norway and then turn around
          and come home?
     A:   It took her that long to discover that a 14-inch Viking was a
          television.
 
137. Q:   What is the irritating part around a blonde's vagina?
     A1:  The blonde!
     A2:  The other guys waiting their turn.
 
138. Q:   How do you describe a blonde, surrounded by drooling idiots?
     A:   Flattered.
 
139. Q:   Why do blondes always die before help arrives?
     A:   They always forget the "11" in "9-1-1".
 
140. Q:   What did the blonde say when asked if she'd ever been picked
          up by "the fuzz"?
     A:   "No. But I've been swung around by the tits."
 
141. Q:   What do you call a swimming pool full of blondes?
     A:   Frosted Flakes.
 
142. Q:   What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?
     A:   Frosted Flakes.
 
143. Q:   How does a blonde interpret 6.9?
     A:   A 69 interrupted by a period.
 
144. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde having her period and
          a terrorist?
     A:   You can negotiate with a terrorist.
 
145. Q:   What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
     A:   "Oh look!  Donut seeds!"
 
146. Q:   Why do blondes have two more brain cells than a cow?
     A1:  So they don't shit everywhere when you pull their tits.
     A2:  So that when you pull their tits, they don't moo.
 
147. Q:   Why don't blondes breast feed?
     A:   Because they always burn their nipples.
 
148. Q:   Did you hear about the blonde lesbian?
     A:   She kept having affairs with men!
 
149. Q:   Why do blondes put their hair in ponytails?
     A:   To cover up the valve stem.
 
150. Q:   What did the blonde name her pet zebra?
     A:   Spot.
 
151. Q:   What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?
     A:   A Space Invader.
 
152. Q:   What's a blondes' favourite rock group?
     A:   Air Supply.
 
153. Q:   What do you see when you look into a blonde's eyes?
     A:   The back of her head.
 
154. Q:   Why do blondes drive VW's?
     A:   Because they can't spell PORSCHE!
 
155. Q:   How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday mornings?
     A:   Tell them a joke on Friday night!
 
156. Q:   Why did God create blondes?
     A:   Because sheep can't bring beer from the fridge.
     Q:   Why did God create brunettes?
     A:   Neither could the blondes.
 
157. Q:   What do you call a blonde in a tree with a brief case?
     A:   Branch Manager.
 
158. Q:   How did the dumb blonde break her leg raking leaves?
     A:   She fell out of the tree.
 
159. Q:   Why do blondes have see-through lunch box lids?
     A1:  So they know if it is morning or afternoon.
     A2:  So that when they're on the train they can tell
          if they're going to work or coming home.
 
160. Q:   Whats black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling?
     A:   A blonde electrician.
 
161. Q:   Why are dumb blonde jokes so short?
     A1:  So brunettes can remember them.
     A2:  Because blondes are so SHALLOW a long joke wouldn't fit.
     A3:  So men can understand them.
 
162. Q:   Why wasn't the Virgin Mary a blonde?
     A:   She wouldn't have been old enough to bear children!
 
163. Q:   What do you call a smart blonde?
     A1:   A golden retriever.
     A2:  A labrador.
     A3:  An indicator of a really bad hangover.
 
164. Q:   Why are blondes hurt by people's words?
     A:   Because people keep hitting them with dictionaries.
 
165. Q:   Why do blondes have periods?
     A:   They deserve them.
 
166. Q:   Why did the blonde fail at being a prostitute?
     A:   Because she gave blow-jobs literally.
 
167. Q:   Why did the blonde smile when she walked the marriage aisle?
     A:   She realized she gave her last blowjob.
 
168. Q:   What did the blonde do when she got her period?
     A:   Looked around for the bastard that must have shot her?
 
169. Q:   Why did they call the blonde "twinkie"?
     A:   She liked to be filled with cream.
 
170. Q:   What did the blonde say to the physicist?
     A:   "Why, I just _love_ nuclear fission!  What do you use for bait?"
 
171. Q:   Why are blondes like cornflakes?
     A:   Because they're simple, easy and they taste good.
 
172. Q:   How does a blonde hold her liquor?
     A:   By the ears.
 
173. Q:   How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?
     A:   You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.
 
174. Q:   How do you drive a blonde crazy?
     A:   Give her a bag of M&Ms and tell her to alphabetise them.
 
175. Q:   What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory?
     A:   Proofreading.
 
176. Q:   Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory?
     A:   For throwing out the W's.
 
177. Q:   Why did the blonde try to steal a police car?
     A:   She saw "911" and thought it was a Porsche.
 
178. Q:   What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
     A:   Last year's hide and seek champ.
 
179. Q:   How do you get a blonde pregnant?
     A:   Come in her shoes and let the flies do the rest.
 
180. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde track team and a tribe of sly
          pygmies?
     A:   One's a bunch a cunning runts.
 
181. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and the Suez/Panama Canal?
     A:   One's a busy ditch.
 
182. Q:   What is the difference between a blonde and a toilet?
     A:   A toilet won't follow you around after you use it.
 
183. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a rooster?
     A:   In the morning a rooster says, "Cock'll-doodl-doooo", while a
          blonde says, "Any-cock'll-doooo."
 
184. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley?
     A:   The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own.
 
185. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and your job?
     A:   Your job still sucks after 6 months.
 
186. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a trampoline?
     A:   You take off your shoes before using a trampoline.
 
187. Q:   What's the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac,
          and a blonde?
     A:   The prostitute says, "Aren't you done yet?"
          The nympho says, "Are you done already?"
          The blonde says, "Beige...I think I'll paint the ceiling beige."
 
188. Q:   How do you get a blonde to marry you?
     A:   Tell her she's pregnant.
     Q:   What will she ask you?
     A:   "Is it mine?"
 
189. Q:   What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel?
     A:   An air bag.
 
190. Q:   Why are there lip stick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde
          drives a car?
     A:   Cause she blows the horn!
 
191. Q:   What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is on?
     A:   It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off.
 
192. Q:   Why did the blonde drive into the ditch?
     A:   To turn the blinker off.

193. Q:   What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH?
     A:   A blonde going through a flashing red light.
 
194. Q:   What is happening when you hear varoom...screech, varoom...screech,
          varoom...screech.....?
     A:   A blonde trying to drive through an intersection with a flashing
          red light.
 
195. Q:   Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach?
     A:   So her male would get delivered to the right box.
 
196. Q:   Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death
          in their car at a drive-in movie theater?
     A:   They went to see "Closed for the Winter".
 
197. Q:   How can you tell when a blonde is dating?
     A:   By the buckle print on her forehead.
 
198. Q:   How can you tell who is a blonde's boyfriend?
     A:   He's the one with the belt buckle the matches the impression in her
          forehead.
 
199. Q:   What is the blonde's chronic speech impediment?
     A:   She can't say "No".
 
200. Q:   What did they name the offspring of a blonde and a Puerto Rican?
     A:   Retardo.

201. Q:   What do you call a blonde in an institution of higher learning?
     A:   A visitor.
 
202. Q:   Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears?
     A:   So she wouldn't get Hearing Aides.
 
203. Q:   How can you tell if a blonde works in an office?
     A:   A bed in the stockroom and huge smiles on all the bosses' faces.
 
204. Q:   Why can't blondes put in light bulbs?
     A:   They keep breaking them with the hammers.
 
205. Q:   What is a cool refreshing drink for a blonde?
     A:   Perri-air.
 
206. Q:   Did you hear about the blonde coyote?
     A:   Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck.
 
207. Q:   Why did the blonde take her typewriter to the doctor?
     A:   She thought it was pregnant because missed a period.
 
208. Q:   When is it legal to shoot a blonde in the head?
     A:   When you have a tire pump to reinflate it!
 
209. Q:   What is a blonde's favorite part of a gas station?
     A:   The Air Pump!
 
210. Q:   How do you measure a blonde's intelligence?
     A:   Stick a tire pressure gauge in her ear!
 
211. Q:   Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License?
     A:   Because she got an F in sex.
 
212. Q:   What do you call two nuns and a blonde?
     A:   Two tight ends and a wide receiver.
 
213. Q:   Why did the blonde cross the road?
     A1:  Forget the road, what was she doing out of the bedroom!?
     A2:  I don't know.
     R:   Neither did she.
 
214. Q:   Did you here about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air?
     A:   She missed.
 
215. Did you here about the blonde that stayed up all night to see
     where the sun went ? It finally dawned on her.
 
216. A blonde was driving down the highway to Disneyland when she saw
     a sign that said "DISNEYLAND LEFT". After thinking for a minute,
     she said to herself "oh well !" and turned around an drove home.
 
     On her way home the same blonde drove past another sign that said
     "CLEAN RESTROOMS 8 MILES". By the time she drove eight miles, she
     had cleaned 43 restrooms.
 
217. How about the suicide blonde,
     she dyed by her own hand.
 
218. A brunette and a blonde are walking along in a park.  The brunette
     says suddenly, "Awww, look at the dead birdie."  The blonde stops,
     looks up, and says, "Where?"
 
219. A policeman pulled a blonde over after he/she'd been driving the
     wrong way on a one-way street.
     Cop:      Do you know where you were going?
     Blonde:   No, but wherever it is, it must be bad 'cause all the
               people were leaving.
 
220. A cop stops a blonde woman who was driving down a motorway.
          "Miss, may I see your driver's licence please?"
          "Driver's licence? What's that?..."
          "It's a little card with your picture on it."
          "Oh, duh! Here it is..."
          "May I have your car insurance?"
          "What's that?..."
          "It's a document that says you are allowed to drive the car."
          "Oh this? Duh! Here you go..."
          The cop then takes his dick out of his pants, while the blonde
          exclaims:
          "Oh no, not another breathalyzer test!"
 
221. Hubby:        As a start I think you should learn to "iron," then we
                   could do without the ironing lady.
     Blonde Wife:  Well if you would learn to Fuck me properly we could do
                   without the gardener.
 
222. A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends:
        Brunette:  Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row!
        Blonde:  That's nothing; last night I had over a hundred.
        Brunette:  My god! I had no idea he was that good.
        Blonde:  ( looking shocked ) Oh, you mean with one guy.
 

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