This is a good, honest letter...so good, in fact, that I can't make fun of it.

Now of course I'm unable to speak for all women, but when a young lad buys me a drink, my initial light-headed joy turns into: "Um, do I have to talk to this palooka?" Really, it's just part of the game. When I'm talking with a guy, I'm not speculating on his SAT scores, I'm wondering, can I picture myself ever kissing this cowboy? (Umm, that's not entirely true. If it's clear he would have trouble spelling 'SAT', that's an immediate turn-off for me. But you didn't ask that.) Most of us want a decent, interesting, intelligent guy who's reasonably human-looking, even-tempered, and not too selfish. So pick-up lines, moves, gimmicks, posturing, and what-have-you: everyone knows what's going on here. If you can make us laugh, super, but it's ok just being yourself.

As much as I dislike to generalize, I would like to point out a major difference between men and women. A man doesn't have to like someone before he's attracted to her. Women do. (So it is for the most part true that men fall in love with the women they're attracted to and women become attracted to the men they fall in love with.) This is why bars and clubs suck as places to meet people, because it's really difficult to give a girl a reason to like you in such a pressured, superficial situation, (unless you've got the goods, looks-wise).

What a girl feels when a guy tries to pick her up depends on the situation. If he's cute and we want to talk to him then we're happy and excited and nervous. If he turns out to be a jerk, we feel let down, we sigh inwardly and talk for awhile and excuse ourselves in search of the nearest rest room, or one of our friends, whichever comes first. I always try to be nice, because I'm aware he's a person with feelings, just like me, and I know that it's not easy to approach someone.

Of course, most people have learned to read body language to some extent, and know when to approach a MOTOS (member of the opposite sex). For example, if she/he is exchanging long looks and smiling, he/she is most likely going to be receptive. See what other people have said regarding this phenomenon.)

Now about those PDAs you mentioned, I have never had the pleasure myself. I would have to say that a chick who puts up with that is not too bright. C'mon folks, dry humping in public: ewww. El, you're definitely not a prude, you have every right to be offended; you described rude and thoughtless behavior. So I hope this rambling cleared that up for ya.

Hugs and kisses,