A couple of weeks ago I saw "The Sixth Sense." Which makes me think I should have written this a couple of weeks ago.

If you have access to a plugged-in television, you've seen the trailers and you know the Sixth Sense is the ability to see dead people. (Previously, I thought the sixth sense was the ability to tell when that saucy dress you've been coveting goes on sale, but whatever.) Haley Joel Osment is eight year old Cole Sear (Cole Sear? Egad. Why not just name him Cole BoyWhoSeesDeadPeeps? I hate trite scriptwriters) and Bruce Willis plays a child psychiatrist (Dr. Malcolm Crowe) who tries to avoid getting himself shot again by helping Cole sort out his threatening secret.

Now I love this spooky supernatural stuff, but the beginning of this film was a bit slow. I started feeling restless, and it wasn't just because of the irritating chatter from the teenyboppers in the audience. The problem was that the movie was holding back on the dead people. Just because I saw the previews, I have to take it on faith that Cole can see ghosts? And when is he going to share his secret with Bruce Willis so we can get on with it? True, nobody asked Bruce Willis to butt in, but that's beside the point. Child psychiatrists are all about butting into other people's lives, particularly the lives of children. Regardless, I came to see dead people, so dammit, show us the dead people!

But first, props to Haley Joel Osment. He was an impressive young actor. So impressive, in fact, that I tried to picture him not being the weirdo in real life that he was in the movie. I couldn't. Well, maybe it wasn't such a stretch for him; I mean, when you're named after a comet, you're probably in for it.

Finally, an hour into it at least, we start seeing some dead people and it's obvious that it sucks having a Sixth Sense. Because these aren't just vague, shimmery ghosts, these dead people appear to be solid and it's easy to figure out why they're dead. Like there's blood and bruises and there's stuff missing. Eww. Plus, they're not very polite or considerate and they keep getting Cole into trouble. Poor Cole. He's already a little freaky, the kids at school don't like him, and on top of that, gross dead people want him to run errands for them. I mean, he's eight years old for crying out loud. He doesn't even have a car. I was really starting to feel sorry for the little fella.

So things pick up after the first half, enough to keep my attention. However, the movie could have been improved with:

1. More dead people
2. More dead people
3. More imaginative dead people who get living people other than Cole into trouble

There were a few twists and turns (good) and a couple of things still didn't make sense to me (bad), but overall I was pleased with the ending. At least it's better than staying at home.

Rating: three juicy squirts