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Hope you enjoy these as much as i do...
NO!!!...I didn't make any of these up...
JEFF FOXWORTHY...Please don't sue me!!!*GIGGLE*

You Just Might be a REDNECK if...

  • If that billboard sign that says, "JUST SAY NO TO CRACK" reminds you to pull up your pants...

  • If you think that a VOLVO, is part of a Women's Anatomy...

  • If you think that the last part of the Star Spangled Banner is: GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES...

  • If your Family Tree does NOT FORK...

  • If you stare at Orange Juice, because it says,"CONCENTRATE"...

  • If you idea of taking your wife on a CRUISE, is circling the Dairy Queen...

  • If your Brother-in-Law, is your Uncle, and your Grandfather...

  • If your Halloween Pumpkin, had more TEETH than your wife...

  • If you think that the OJ Trial, is an Orange Juice Taste test...

  • If you go to your Family Reunion, to pick up Women...

  • If your idea of High Quality entertainment, is a Six Pack and a Bug Zapper...

  • If you have a RAG, for a GAS CAP...

  • If you consider your Liscence Plate personalized, because your dad made it in JAIL...

  • If you have to go OUTSIDE, to get something from the Fridge...

  • If your Truck has CURTAINS in it, but your House does not...

  • If you have ever made CHANGE, in the Offering Plate...

  • If you have Spray Painted your girlfriends name on an Overpass...

  • If your Richest Relative just got a new House, and you have to help take the WHEELS off of it...

  • If you can't MARRY your SWEETHEART, cause' there's a LAW Against it...

  • If you consider 5th Grade, Your Senior Year...

  • If your Hunting Dog, costs more than the Truck you drive him around in...

  • If your DOG can't watch you eat with out getting SICK...

  • If you have lost TEETH, from opening a bottle of BEER...

  • If your Whole Family, has sat arround waiting for a call from the GOVERNOR, to spared a loved one...

  • If you own a HOMEMADE Fur Coat...

  • If your idea of "Taking Out the Trash" Is taking out your IN-LAWS to a movie...

  • If your Coffee Table, used to be a Cable Spool...

  • If the Home Shopping Operator, recongized your VOICE...

  • If you think a Bubble Bath, begins with eating BEANS for dinner...

  • If anybody in your Family died right after saying, "Hey Ya'll Watch This"...

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