Here is a collection of poetry that my friend in Peru Illinois wrote......His name is Joe Trotter, so if you know him, let him know what a fantastic job he did!
Ashes
Sifting through the ashes that remain
Unbridled confusion rapes it's way into the mind
Looking desperately for the answers
Finding only more and more questions
Is it all just a sad, shocking dream?
Or is this new confusion and pain real
Searching diligently through the lies
Seeking truth and nothing more
These empty ashes have built into a mountain
Containing a lifetime of shattered dreams
Reaching for the core, unable to see
Coming out with empty hands
Only the ashes of the past remaining.
Attack
Hiding my rage, suppressing my power
Holding back my darkest hour
These feelings I know all too well
To ease the rage, my soul I would sell
Mind flowing insanely with violent acts
Unable to rest, kick back, or relax
Tension mounting with every breath
Wanting to hurt, maim, and cause death
The who, what, when, and where's of life
Surrounding me always, causing me strife
My mind telling me always to start the fight
Why me? I scream into the night
They say contain, ease your violent nature
Act like a man, be more mature
I see them watch me everywhere
Glaring down upon me without a care
They think they are better, this is their land
They better get ready for the change of hand
I cannot be stopped, will not be held back
The world best prepare for the attack.
Blade
Hot, cracked asphalt blistering beneath the wheels
Adrenaline filling every pore of my body
Racing blindingly fast toward the challenge ahead
Wind searing all around, trying to hold me back
Slapping onto the wooden god, soaring into flight
Sensation of weightlessness ruling all
Falling from grace, rubber marrying pavement once more
Grinding to a stop, glancing back with a smile
Why we do it cannot be explained
It has to be experienced to completely understand
Exotic feelings of freedom, speed and flight
This is why we blade.
Chained
Rusty steel wrapped in coils around my body
Unbreakable chains, heavy and maddening
Links that have been formed over time
Wrapping me infinitely, never to escape
Nothing but more links
Binding my soul, crushing me
No lock, no key of absolution
Squeezing my mind, wrapping tighter
Trying always to break me
Forced to carry them everywhere
The links of the past
Finding ways to ruin me
Constantly I try to escape
But cold steel finds a way to ruin me.
Conquering the Demons
A snap decision to change it all
The world you know slipping away into the darkness
Trying to leave all the hurt and rage behind
Old life fading into a memory
A new one beckoning from afar
Seemingly endless road screaming beneath the wheels
Fresh adrenaline flowing through starving veins
Finally you listened to the voice inside your head
Rushing away instead of dwelling on lifes' pains
Conquering indecison, you are the only believer
People call you crazy, stupid, and worthless
Simple minded people in dead end lives
Enjoy the life, for the demons are on the road behind
Your future is now and very real.
Cry Love
Telephone rings in the middle of the night
Jolting up, trying to comprehend mumbles
What? When? WHY? WHY?
Screaming into the uncomforting darkness
Every emotion known to man floods my mind
Fear, Love, Joy, Pain, Sorrow, and Rage
My body begins to shut down
Unable to handle the barrage
All the while shaking violently
I will not be comforted
I cannot allow a touch now
Rain streams down my face, mixed with tears
On my knees, unable to stand
Trying to turn back time
Glancing back, looking for a way
To prevent the sudden pain
Mind is filled with insane emotion
She is gone, ripped away coldly
Shattered in a mere heartbeat
Love is lost forever.
Dark Angel
Between the whipping winds of heaven
And the molten depths of hell
I find an angel, perched upon a tombstone
Dressed in the black of night, skin pale as sunshine
I observe cautiously as she follows me with her gaze
Sizing me up, reading my mind, I know not
Yet I cannot remove my own stare
My mind is transfixed by this eternal beauty
She sits so powerful, yet ever so frail
It seems my life was incomplete before this moment
OH to touch her would be pure ecstasy
Such a touch could exorcise the demons of my soul
This love I feel cannot be held back
I yearn for her touch, her kiss, her voice
Never before have I been so enchanted
But never before have I looked into the eyes of an angel
She is my life and my death, she has the power to break me
She can set me free, I have found my angel.
Dark Rain
The clouds creep up behind my figure like a stalker following
me home for the kill. A sharp gust of night wind strikes
the nape of my neck, raising my awareness once again to
the oncoming storm. I quicken my pace a bit, ever trying to
outrun the shroud of dark rain that has been following my mind,
body, and soul for the past year. It seems no matter how fast I move,
the clouds double that pace, creeping ever closer. Now the rain
begins again. Cold and pounding me, trying to break my spirit.
With the rain falls messages of hate, rage, and disgust. Picking
at my brain, trying to force their way in. But I won't give
in, wont give up. After a year of this constant torture, I
must be insane not to let the darkness take me. Still
I refuse, because I know that somewhere in the distance my
future awaits me. Where or what it is I still do not know, but
I shall find it one day because I cannot allow this dark rain
to destroy who I am or what I am to become.
Disturbed
I am disturbed
My "friends" lie about me
My "love" doesn't care
Nothing is what I've become
Yet I still hold everything
Because I have my life
They torture me with lies
With pain and false dreams
And I stand tall
I do not regret what I am
I refuse such a proposal
I will survive this once again
This current life that enraptures me
I will not be broken
Only disturbed.
Dreams
Drifting off to peaceful slumber
Escaping reality, entering my other world
A scene appears before me
It is my true love and myself
Walking hand-in-hand along a wooden bridge
The spectrum of autumn leaves all around
Glancing into her eyes, I need nothing more
Then it all fades, another scene forming
A gentle kiss from the one I love warms me
Embracing it as if I may never have another
Hearts connecting and beating in rhythm
Souls melting with a kiss
Again my glory fades, a roaring fireplace appears
Holding my lover close in front of the embers
Chilly winter storm outside kept at bay
No one can invade the love I feel
Fire dancing bright, crackling aloud
Warming us to the core
Hours go by unnoticed
I try to keep the scene from fading
But to no avail, I awaken with a frown
Then a grin forms on my lips
My dream world may be gone for another day
But I wake up next to my love.
Erase
Staring down the angel of death himself
Peering into his void, black eye sockets
Beast within crying to be set loose
Desperately restraining until the moment is right
It all rests upon the timing
That is the key to the victory
In a snap, striking with unparalleled speed
All the repressed anger set free
Raging out from deep within my body
Thrashing and slicing with the precision of a razor
My blade slashing through the reaper like butter
Payback finally achieved through pain
Making death pay for the eons of hurt
Trying to erase all the loss
Accomplishment never felt so good.
EYE
Looking through the sparkling outer shell
Everything becoming crystal clear
The soul is found within
Beckoning for help from deep inside
Holding all the pain of the past
Keeping all the keys to the future
Some are blind to he mysteries held within
Blocking it out, unable to handle the raw truth
Seeing only a simple eye
But I reach further, I can see it all
For the eye is the window to the soul.
FALLEN ANGEL
Falling from grace with clipped wings
Spiraling toward hell, she no longer sings
Betraying her god, paying the ultimate price
His vengeance was swift and cold as ice
A simple kiss, love pure and sweet
In his eyes, it showed only deceit
For in his realm love can be only for him
If another is loved survival is slim
She confessed her longing for another soul
Getting his mercy, her only goal
For her loving another she must now die
As the tears roll slowly from her eyes.
Falling In
Teetering on the brink of everything and nothing
I peer back over my shoulder in disgust
The rock beneath my feet crumbles and I fall
Spiraling into the void, smiling and unafraid
Soft mist flows all around me
Filling my body and soul with warmth
Filling my mind with a dream of something real
I don't fight the sensations or the purity
Too wondrous a feeling, the completeness it brings
Love has wrapped me into it's wings
The falling cannot be fought, nor restrained
For no other emotion holds a candle to it's power
Some shun it, some deny it's existence
But for the touched, there will always be love.
Forbidden Fruit
I sit and dream of an angel
A smile that melts the heart
Eyes that burn into the soul
Hair ever so soft and radiant
Yet her hand belongs to another
She is a forbidden goddess
Yet still I sit and dream
Of one who's lips I've never kissed
Who's ideas and dreams are unknown
Ever the mystery to my eyes
Our exchanges are so brief and innocent
Yet I recall each one with crystal clarity
To her I am just a passing acquaintance
To me she remains the forbidden fruit.
Innocence Lost
The petal of a rose falls onto the water
A resonating wave follows abruptly
Clear water, pure and untouched
Disturbed by this foreign object
Blown in by a gust of wind
Unsettling the trance of the water
Briefly interrupting the balance
No longer untouched, no longer pure
Drained in an instant of it's uniqueness
Now just like thousands more
No one knows, no one sees
When the innocence is lost.
I Walk Alone
I walk alone
Crimson cloak whistling on the nights' breeze
I stare at the star scattered sky
Wandering through the nameless countries
Fire inside my only companion
I dance it along my fingers playfully
Passing the endless time without care
Time no longer exists for me
There is no tomorrow, only endless todays
Faces of my victims haunt my sleep
Proving no peace for my soul
I am an outcast in todays society
Labeling me "witch" and "vampire"
I am neither, yet I am both
Harnessing fire by its' crimson core
Using it to get my retribution
It envelops my soul, bringing rage
Boiling through my veins, we are one
My eyes hold the pain of centuries
Deep green and shining bright with fury
Fooling mortals cannot comprehend my power
Underestimating my power and dying for their stupidity
Always seeking retribution, I walk alone.
I Write
I write of who I am
What I have to say, how I feel
I write to release emotion
Also to prove to myself I'm real
I write to pass the time
Of my desolated life
I write of inner peace
My happiness, my strife
Too many ask me why
I scribble late into the night
I have no excuses, no solid reasons
I just write.
Jennie
I stand and wait for the rain
Tearfully glaring at the tombstone before me
No answer to the question why
Those sparkling baby blue diamonds
Those eyes will remain forever closed
A mind full of ambition and dreams
Sleeps now, eternally
Her spirit makes us stronger
Never to be forgotten
Jennie now rests at peace
She has her wings
Now she rules from up on high
Guarding us whom she loved.
Junkie
The euphoric feeling it brings
Seems to replace real life
Just one more hit they say
They only need ONE more hit
Life no longer exists
It's shattered remains always haunting
All the people hurt
Escape comes in a needle
Reality is gone
Not caring how they get it
As long as their "fix" comes
The needle is the only thing that matters
Sucking a little life out at a time
They would sell their soul for one more hit
Just ONE more hit.
Liar
Living in a swarm of lies
Unknowingly succumbing to their power
Believing all I knew was real
Every day becoming more sour
Then truth jumps out of thin air
Oh what a tangled web we weave
Now twisting my mind with clarity
When first you practiced to deceive
Eyes now being stung with fresh tears
Truth ripping my heart in two
I never knew you were so full of deceit
Refusing to believe the lies came from you
But they are real, the truth is out
Why have you done this to me?
I trusted and loved with all my being
Crushed and broken, I've been forced to see
Your lies were so cold and slick
You now fill me with hate, it's sad to say
I've been used in yet another game
Yet I live to love another day.
Living
Flying down the twisted road of life without a care
Feeling untouchable entering through the iron gates of society
Backing down to no man or woman
Yet having deep rooted fears of death
Knowing that at any moment the reaper could appear
And choose you as next to join him
In dying, you become just another statistic
Another body put six feet under by life's misfortunes
Random anarchy plucks fresh victims every day
Lives are taken randomly by the evils of society
We must learn that we are living on the edge
Throughout our whole lives.
Love
I felt my life spinning out of control
Then you opened your heart to my wandering soul
You have the answers, the key to my heart
With you in my future I've found a great start
Always listening to my tales of sorrow
Brightening each day my hope for tomorrow
Shining happiness inside, abundant and new
The emptiness is gone, because of you
My nightmares are fading, you are my light
Visions of love now fill my dreams at night
You gave me love, with it a new goal
I will never hurt you, I swear on my soul.
Love Lost
A dying rose sleeps on the beach
Grains of sand penetrating its beauty
Careless wind ravages the petals
Petals that once were crimson red
Now dark maroon like old brick
Once, in a time that seems distant now
This rose was in the hand of a fair maiden
Held intertwined in lovers hands
Those days are sadly missed
For the lovers no longer exist
Jealousy conquered their love
Stains of salty tears remain on the stem
Cologne and perfume scents faint still
Scents of love lost.
Missing You
Watching the sun set in the west
Another day ending, not the best
For I sit alone and dream of tomorrow
Living with my pain and sorrow
Dreaming of another day
Searching my soul to find a way
To make it through hell one more hour
Alone I do not have the power
Here I am already dead
That much is locked in my head
I need to go away, start fresh and new
I want to be happy, to be with you
To leave the pain and hurt behind
Saving my soul and clearing my mind
You make the days worthwhile
With all the pain you still make me smile
In your arms it will all go away
Patiently I wait for that day
Hoping one day my dream will come true
Until that time I will be missing you.
Mother
Mother is the first word learned by most
The comforting one, eternal host
Always there with the answer you need
Constantly protecting her precious seed
She holds you close when you are ill
Quick to bandage if you take a spill
In her creation she takes pride
Always standing by your side
Ever abundant love she shows
Every day it grows and grows
You fear her wrath, yet love her so
How much she loves you cannot know.
Nightmare
Jilting up from peaceful slumber
Covered in sweat from head to toe
Pulse racing, breathing heavy and erratic
Trying to swallow, mouth parched
Flick of a lighter brings forth a bright flame
Throwing dancing shadows all around me
Head still fuzzy from the awakening
Waking from a hellish nightmare
Trying to force my mind to remember
What brought me to this state
Feeling the sheets, drenching my hand
Covers tossed aside, pillow rumpled in a corner
Head still fuzzy, trying to clear
Scraping ever so diligently to remember
Trying to remember the wicked nightmare.
Ode to Peanut Butter
A wise man once told me three things
1) When in doubt, consult the blender
2)Avoid the clowns at all costs,
or they will follow you forever
3)Stop the frogs before they learn flight
After many fortnights of sitting in my
Oven and contemplating the meaning
Of the statements, I only have one
question. Does peanut butter come
in a spray can?
Past
Walking down the deserted highway at night
Thinking about life's misfortunes
Escaping the rusty cage that is home
Wanting to wander forever, never to return
Society shuns, no one cares
I am the only true believer
Past reminding me always of what I've done
Constantly haunting my soul never to leave
Wanting to erase the emotional scars
Knowing they are permanent
Never will I erase the past
But maybe I can learn from it
Use the past as a weapon
A weapon of emotion
Preventing new pain
Fading the old pain of the past.
RAIN
Watching the April rain fall from the black, clouded sky
I feel it cleansing me of all worries great and small
Taking me to a place of joy and happiness
Giving me back my ambition and pride
As it flows through my soul and unlocks the windows of my mind
The rain makes me forget my many failures and misfortunes
Erasing painful memories of lost loves and broken dreams
Replacing them with future accomplishments and new love
They say rain cleans and cleanses
But this rain has given my life a new direction.
REVENGE
Embracing darkness as your only friend
No one else cares, nor matters
You are the only one you can trust
They don't believe, nor do they understand
You've trusted and heard promises of all kinds
Always ending up broken and alone
They have twisted your mind and raped your soul
Trying to conform you to their beliefs
But you've learned a promise is just words
Love is but an illusion always out of reach
Dreams are nothing more than thoughts
They say "I" can help you
"I" understand what you're going through
All just another lie stamped into your heart
You are this way because of them
You cannot be "fixed", extensive damage is done
Unrepairable in it's desolate, massive grandness
A lifetime of living with shaded eyes
Shaded to the sickening truth of the world
Removing the invisible shade, and with it their grip
Blinding light of reality burning your eyes
A wicked grin forming slowly on your lips
Evil plans spinning madly in a fresh, unobstructed mind
Age old scars begin to heal in your battered soul
New blood flows through re-energized veins
They had their fun, their lies and games
Now comes revenge, bitter and ever so sweet.
Road
Within the light of a quarter moon
I walk the road to nowhere
I've seen disturbing things all over this world
Anymore I just don't care
A car screams by interrupting my thoughts
These thoughts that cause me pain
Walking along for hundreds of miles
Hoping my efforts are not in vain
My search is incomplete until I find peace
Peace needed for my disturbed, wandering soul
As usual I find nothing
Still I yearn for that unattainable goal
I do not sleep, I cannot rest
Looking at people with my cold stare
Endlessly I will walk this road
I walk the road to nowhere.
Satanic Verses
As long as there is fear and pain in the hearts of men
Destroy them I will, again and again
I had to move somewhere new to raise hell
Thoughts of destruction made me feel well
Creeping at night to a small little hollow
Filled with many souls I would soon swallow
It was an old village with seventeen cottages and one farm
Nothing they could do could protect them from harm
The town was surrounded by orchards, underneath very black
I slept there my first night planning my attack
Waking to the sounds of a parade the next day
I knew I would destroy them, yet had to decide on the way
Aha! I would show them my true form, blind them with the sight
Then burn them to a crisp, while they are frozen with fright
Stealthily sneaking into the towns' little affair
Revealing my true form, at their despair
Firing my flame, watching the pain in their eyes
Listening intently to their banshee-like cries
I watched them crumble, one by one
The ends of their lives to me was just fun.
Seek The Light
Our world today is a cesspool
We wade through every day
From the transients under our bridges
To the crooked wall street brokers
Why can't we all get along?
Is that so much to ask?
Bring our people a brighter tomorrow
Instead of war, famine, and unemployment
It's sad that we are living in a dark age
With all of our "technology" and "growth"
We are worse off now than 20 years ago
When will our government help us?
Never, we must do it one person at a time
Working together toward a solution
A solution of peace of harmony
We need to seek the light to end the darkness.
She Sleeps
A horn blazes piercing the night
The chatter of a man tickles her ear
She shifts restlessly
Covering her ears with a weeks old newspaper
Trying to quiet a city that never sleeps
Lying in an alley undisturbed
Cart of life resting idlely nearby
Holding everything she calls her own
Nothing else is needed
Except sleep, which is at times impossible
She fears this may be one of those nights
Cold and alone under the lights
Rough cover of magazines and news clippings
Doesn't keep the cold at bay
No justice for this vagrant woman
Finally she sleeps.
Smile
You understand my inner pains
Brightening each day with your presence
Your soft, sweet smile melts my soul
And that cautious giggle leaving your precious lips
Is the voice of an angel, beckoning me
Mending my heart and forcing a grin
I thought I was alone forever
You changed that with merely three words
That gentle touch would give me shivers
Proving I can love again
Giving me hope to go on
Just your simple smile
Has driven me to strive on
To make something of my empty life
This is why I love you.
STOP
See my pain, fuck the sorrow
No more lies, no more tomorrow
All is lost, swept away
Once again my soul must pay
Stop this madness, clear my mind
I try to shove it all behind
Yet it will follow me till the day I die
Again I break, shudder, and cry
Nothing new, pain very old
How dare you to be so bold
Leave me alone to be at peace
Make it STOP, make it cease.
Storm
The stars illuminating the night sky fade
Scents of the oncoming event overcome all others
White flashes dance above like old lovers
Lightning intertwining, exclaiming it's joy with thunder
Roaring like a lion or an angry god, shaking the ground
Then comes the rain, filling the sky and flooding the ground
I let it envelop me, flooding my senses
Watching, listening, and feeling the awesome theatre
A small part of the theatre of nature
Both dangerous and beautiful, the awe-inspiring storm.
Sunset
Watching as the purple and amber glows
One of natures most amazing shows
Some view them close with lover in hand
Resting comfortably on grainy sand
Some don't care to view at all
To watch the spectacular sun fall
Lights dimming with amazing shades
Stimulating the senses as it invades
Awe-striking beauty settling in for the night
Soon it will crash, diminishing the light
But as the eternal moments pass before
Take in a sunset, this one and many more.
Thoughts
Leaning on the rusted rail of a decaying bridge
A stream shuffles by underneath unnoticed
An owl's voice pierces the night, unheard
My mind is elsewhere, pondering
Thinking of the pale yesterdays
Wondering what the tomorrows' will bring
If they will bring more pain
Or if they shall harbor well deserved joy
Harvest moon outlines the towering trees overhead
The trees that make me one with the night
Fading my presence, unseen to all
I stand and notice the unblemished darkness
Listening to the nights' sounds
Losing myself in the black heart of the night
Still I ponder a resolution
I wait patiently for my mind to find the future
Hoping only for new outlook
And a fresh tomorrow to lead the way.
Unchained
Deception and lies, suspicion of betrayal
Scraping through skin like a rusted nail
I know I cannot escape the past
But I will endure, my soul will last
These chains I created suffocating my breath
Bringing me ever closer to my death
They may believe whatever they wish
I consume their hatred, it is my dish
I did not lie, I know for a fact
I merely used my skill and tact
They may not want to understand my mind
If they cannot, I'll leave them behind
I know what I am, I will have my life
No longer will they cause me strife
Loving and losing, the story of my time
The hurt they've caused should be a crime
I am unbroken, unchained, now I can see
I've regained control, my soul is free.
Vampyre
Cruel sunlight finally banished in the west
Comforting emptiness surrounds me
The cold, heartless darkness is my only comfort
I embrace it, and in turn become it
Traveling swiftly on the nights' wings
Now is my time, the hour has come
Searching hungrily for my next meal
Stalking relentlessly the empty souls of the world
They do not deserve to live
For they do not appreciate their short mortal lives
With razor sharp fangs I rape their veins
Adding to my own unstoppable power
The blood of humans energizes me
With it comes the euphoric feeling of immortality
Nothing and no one can stop me
I am a creature of shadows
Call me vampyre.
Wonder
Standing alone on the oceans shore
Wondering why it all went away
Lost in the thoughts of past joys
Wondering why it all went away
Glaring at the silvery moon in disgust
Wondering why it all went away
Weeping aloud with no one consoling
Wondering why it all went away
Crashing to your knees, unable to stand
Wondering why it all went away
Breaking down and releasing all sorrows
Wondering why it all went away
Sobbing lips are mumbling "why?"
Wondering why it all went away
Falling on the beach lined with tears
Wondering why it all went away
Staring up at the starry heavens
Knowing why it all went away.
YOU
Rage, confusion, pain, and desire
Constantly building my inner fire
Insomnia steals away the night
I only pray soon I will take flight
Pushing and pushing until my mind cries
I cannot dry my wetted eyes
My being seeming like an empty hole
This tremendous void has devoured my soul
Longing to leave, to start anew
It can only be done with help from you
Your light shines in and keeps the evil at bay
I need you more with each passing day
You rid me of the suffering that lies within
Knowing with you a new life can begin
I will rise from the ashes, become a new man
With you by my side I know I can.
If anyone has poetry that they would like me to publish on my web site, please feel free to email me your poems with your name and location so that I can give you the proper credit.
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