[Hardcore, straight-up, propoganda is infiltrating the school district. History rewrites, facsist loyalty, cameras, media control, yup, someone is misleading the misguided masses. Truth is no longer a part of the equation of reality. Who would do such an abomindable thing? Who would gain from parents thinkin’ our test scores were terrible because of modern curriculum? Who scores if tax payers think that the school is perfectly safe from wicked influences? Who recieves accolades if folk think the air quality reports are a bit overstated? Yes, our worst fears are coming true: the district has strayed for teaching to propoganda. The old approach to stopping falsehoods is to tell how it really it is. Everyone has heard hte advice “the cure for a lie is the truth.” Sadly, this ain’t true. If I were to tell the truth, the average person compromises between my truth and their lie, making for a product taht is still tainted with discprepancies. No, the only way to beat a lie is lie equally but opposite. (Newton’s third.) Here is a dose of anti-propogandalism.

Falsehood #1.
Bethel kids don’t do well on tests because they do not try and are taught different subject matter.

Anti-propoganda #1
Bethel kids do poorly on tests because they are as dumb as assorted vegtable sticks wearing hand-knitted gloves in august. They could not score well on these assesments if the promise of a kilo of good ole crack cocaine.(Hold up, this isn’t that far from the truth. You can only lie so much.)

Falsehood #2
Bethel’s air quality is not really that bad.

Anti-propoganda #2
Everyone that has spent over 20 minutes in Bethel High School will brain hemorage and foam at the mouth. The eyes will cross and the color of the pupils will drain. They will lose teeth and vomit blood until they choke and die a grosteque death.

Falsehood #3
“The greatest people in the world walk these halls.”

Anti-propoganda #3
(For undisclosed personal reasons the author has declined to negate this blatant lie. See last year’s January issue for clarificatioin.)

Falsehood #4
Bethel students are protected from outside evil influences.

Anti-propoganda #4
Bethel students could be better protected if class were held in a burlesque house. Many BHS kids know more than many pornographers and speak like 17th century drunken sailors on shore leave who discoveres that his entertainment is really his sister. Yup, the infomal name of the library is the Larry Flynt archive. I know that our friends over at the district are doing their duty, I just think that they should tell the truth. Fight the thought police. Thank you.]