A man died and went to heaven, where he met St. Peter sitting at a desk in the middle of a great hall. On the walls were millions of clocks. What are those used for? he asked. St. Peter said, "there's one of them for every living person on Earth ticking out the days of their lives."
The newcomer noticed that the hands of some of the clocks were moving faster than others. "Why do they move at different speeds," he asked. St.Peter said, "Every time you tell a lie you lose one day of your life."
The newcomer looked around and then asked, "Do you have one of these for Laloo Prasad Yadav ?" St. Peter answered, "Sure, it is in the back room, we use it for a ceiling fan!!
Laloo is having a bad morning, as he explains to one of his goons in the office. A letter had just arrived addressed to The Stupidest Man in Bihar. There was no other address on the envelope. "Did you catch the guy who left it?" asked the goon. "That's the problem," Laloo replies "it came through the post office."