Pets are undeniably objects of love Some owners love them less, some more. In advertising pets or puppies are often used as symbols of tender and loving feelings. But why do we choose an another species as our object of love. Why do we not rather direct our love to other human beings. The answer is the difficulty of human relations. Close human relations give warmth and love, but contain also disappointments, rivalry, jealousness, difficulties of balancing own and another needs, There can be fear of betrayal, fear of closeness or fear of loosing the other. Although we see love and friendship as the most important thing in our lives, we evade easily close relationships due the emotional strain they bring with. For example someone can use lot of time to take care of her dogs, but at the same time do not visit her retired and widowed lonely father.

The modern lifestyle and super-individualistic culture had made possible to live alone with only superficial contacts to other people.

There are different ways how people try to get the positive sides of human relations and evade the strain which is part of these relationships. A computer dependent or internet dependent person spends his time with cyber-friends in different irc or chat rooms. This way he can better control the interaction and avoid revealing his own vulnerable points. But doing this he also looses the real depth of emotions felt in "flesh contacts".

An alcoholic use liquor to wash out his social anxieties and so he encounters other people with reduced negative emotional reactions. This way he can in drunken state feel moments of friendship and warmth with fellow drinkers so long as the booze circulates in his veins. This is kind of instant friendship with help of chemical substance.

A pet can also be a partial substitute for real human relationship. It has many advantages. A pet do not betray you. It don't argue, you have absolute control over it. You can also self control the emotional deepness of this human-animal relationship. And you can buy this companion at the nearest supermarket.

But can pet keeping be harmful to an individual? Possibly.

• 1.Also negative feelings and emotions are important in our lives. Sometimes feelings of desperation and loneliness are necessary to change the direction of ones life and these feelings remind us how important close relationships are.
• 2. Some psychoanalysts claim, that we have a certain amount of love (or libido) to give to other people. If we direct our love resources to pets, less love energy is left to other humans.
• 3. If an individual has poor social skills or intra psychic problems which makes his social life difficult, the only way to make the situation better is learn and develop his skills among other people. If a person has tendencies to withdraw from social life to solitude, he can loose his possibilities to development. If he in this situation uses pets as artificial surrogates to human social contacts, pets may have a negative effect to person. This would be the case of real pet dependency.

Sometimes overworking parents who have not enough time or quality time to give their children buy a pet to comfort the child, who needs parents love and time. This is not the right solution to the problem.

On the other hand a pet could be a help to a teenager, who is growing independent from parents and not mature enough to relationship with the opposite sex (A pet could function like the transitional object in little children as D.W.Winnicott had described it.) A common phenomenon is also, that young couples acquire a dog little before they have their first "real" child.

On the level of society the loneliness is increasing due to collapse of close family structures and appreciation of individuality. The businessmen has also noticed this and different forms of commercial services have been developed to make money by releasing feelings of loneliness. Pet trade can be seen as a part of this commercial activity.

There is a cliche of an old maiden living alone with her cats. I don't believe, that she has stayed bachelor because she has cats. The real reason why someone do not get married lies deeper in his or her personality. But maybe her probabilities to get married had been little higher, if she had not acquired pets.

Pet dependency, if it exist, should not put in the same class as drug abuse or alcoholism. It should be compared with milder, less harmful and socially accepted dependencies like TV-dependency or caffeine-dependency.