Send ANY comments/questions/rants etc. privately to: 
jenross@win32supportbbs.vnet.net
That goes for requests for previous fanfics

Disclaimer: I don't own Roar. I don't own the characters. I'm 
not that rich. I'd like to be, but I won't make anything from 
this. This is just fun. The only thing that I own in this is Aerin. 
And Katherine. And a few others I just might add.
#######################################################

	Aerin sat cross legged on her bed. Yawning, she was 
running a comb through her hair, attempting to manage her unruly 
curls. The night was chilly,  and the damp feeling could be felt 
on her skin through the thin night shift. Katherine poked her 
head in, still laughing. Aerin could hear a masculine voice
laughing with her, but no one's voice was that familiar to her, yet. 
	"Aerin, are you alright for the night? I was just talking 
with Conor..." she asked, her eyes merry. 
	"Yes, Katie. I'm alright. But, can I talk to you really 
fast?" Aerin  requested. 
	"Aye." she came in, and closed the flap tightly behind 
her. "Is anything wrong? Has someone...?" worried, she sat on 
the bed next to her charge.
	"No, Katie. I just wanted to ask you a question." 
Katherine nodded, so she went on. "Well, Katherine, do you 
love my father?"
	Katherine didn't know what to say. "Aerin, I don't 
know how to answer that. Your father and I...are good friends. 
Nothing more. I love him as my best friend." she hoped that 
she hadn't blushed like a little girl when she replied.
	"Oh." Aerin sounded disappointed. Katherine stood 
up. "Well, good night, little one." she kissed the top of her 
head, and left. 
	Aerin sighed. "She acts as if I was a tiny little girl 
again. Never once does she treat me like a woman." she 
twisted the ring on her finger around a few times. This was 
her link to her family, what she had thought was her family.
Picking up the heavy furs and quilts, she slid under them. 
Shivering, she blew out the candle by the side. "Good night, 
father, mother, brothers, and sisters.  Good night to you all." 
she closed her eyes, and held her hands together to  pray. "Our 
Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom 
come. Thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven. Give us 
this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses as we 
forgive those who trespass against us. Lead us not into 
temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the 
Kingdom, will, and glory, forever. Bless my family. Bless 
my father. Bless my foster mother. Bless everyone. In Jesus' 
precious and Holy name I pray.  Amen." she closed her eyes. 
For the first time since she came to Eire, she knew everything 
was back to normal.
	The next morning, bright and early, she crawled out 
of her bed, and into some clothes. It didn't matter what she 
wore, she was going to go on an adventure, today. She didn't 
know where she would go, but if she was going to live on this 
island for the rest of her life, she would get to know the
landscape around the village. Pulling her boots on, she stumbled 
out the door. 
	No one was around. 'Do they all sleep late around 
here? How does any one get any work done around here?' she 
walked up to the hut that she knew was her father's. Opening 
the door, she saw one of the worst sights she had ever seen in 
her life. 

	She saw her father. What he was doing, however, 
made it so shoking to her. He was sleeping with a woman. With 
Katherine. "I can't believe you two!" she shouted at them. Conor 
opened his eyes, blinking away sleep. Disoriented for a moment, 
he yawned, then realized where he was and who was confronting
him. His eyes widened, and he muttered under his breath a string of
curse words, all of which Aerin had never been privaliged to hear. 
	"Its not what you think it is." he protested. 
	"What is it, then?" tears were coming to her eyes. They 
lied to her. They were sinning. Worst off, they were lying now! 
	"We got drunk." he said. 
	Aerin shook her head. This is not happening. This is not
happening! "How could you? You should behave yourself better 
when you get drunk. You aren't my father. My father wouldn't do 
this." she yelled at him. Turning quickly away, she fled, towards 
the woods. The last thing she heard was her father mention a random 
curse under his breath. 
	She ran faster than she ever had, before. Home. Home. 
That was the place to go. Home. Where they were Christians. 
Where she knew the people. Where she would walk into her parent's 
room and find them together, not with the various other people of 
the clan. HOME! She tripped on the underbrush, but kept going. 
Nothing would stop her, now. Swatting branches out of her way,
she came at the river. Following it, she tripped on a rock, and fell. 

	Conor pulled on his breeches with one hand, yanking a tunic 
over his head with another. He had to go after his daughter. What 
would happen if she got hurt? Conor winced, Caitlin would have 
killed him, by now. He ran after her, following the trail of broken 
branches and boot prints. 
	He found her crumpled up by the river. "Aerin!" he shouted. 
She didn't move. His heart in his mouth, he dropped to her side. Had 
he lost her? His fingers fumbled at her throat, feeling for a pulse. 
They were in the same place on her neck that he had placed on Caitlin's. 
Caitlin...please don't let her be dead! There was a beat. It was there, 
strong and steady. "Sweet Mother!" he closed his eyes, and picked up 
his little girl in his arms. Carefully, he carried her back to the Sanctuary 
with the pain-staking care he had held her with when she was
first born. 

Katherine hugged her knees against her chest, rocking herself.
She stared down at Aerin, a worried expression on her face. Aerin 
was like her daughter. She couldn't die. This was Caitlin's child. And 
Conor's child...she would not let Conor mess up her thoughts. How 
many times she had wished she was in her sister's shoes she could 
not remember. They hadn't really wanted everyone to know that
they were indeed sisters, but it was let out at Caitlin's funeral. Now,
she wasn't planning to have to lay her neice's body beside her sister's. 
	"Conor, please, will she be alright?" she begged. 
	Conor looked up at her. "And its all my fault. All mine. I can't
believe that she's actually...that she might...she won't die." he decided on 
those words, his eyes clamped tight. "It was my fault her mother died. 
And now she will...I couldn't bear it if two of mine died. And with 
tomorrow being Samhain... she's got to live to be fourteen. At least that. 
I promised her mother at least that much." thinking of Caitlin was 
getting too much. Trying hard not to let it get out of hand, he thought
quickly of last night. He had lied to his daughter. Last night was not a
night in which he mearly got drunk and let other things run his thinking, 
but a night in which his mind was clear, or rather more sharpened. At 
least it was before he went to bed. Once there... well, things were 
different once he was in bed. THAT cleared his mind of Caitlin. 
	"Katie, what do you think that last night...well, what 
happened last night?" he asked her, his eyes focusing on her. 
	She blushed, smiling. "Last night, things went very well. I
think we both felt the same way. That was real." her voice was soft.
	Grinning like a fool, he whispered, "And what if something 
comes of it?" she couldn't answer for a moment.
	What if...someone found out...if she got pregnant...OH MY 
GOD! What if she got pregnant? There was always that option. She 
would bear Conor a child. And Aerin would have a half brother or 
sister. What would people think of her, then? Relaxing, she
remembered that the people here did not believe in God, and that 
what the Bible called adultery she could commit her whole life 
without being punished. This was sounding ever so much better than 
Christianity. Finally having an answer, she softly told him,
"I hope something does come of it." He was about to lean over, and 
kiss her, when Aerin made a noise. She groaned, moving her head 
around on her pillow. Both their eyes were focused on her. 
	"Da?" she asked. Her eyes opened, and she stared up at him. 
	"Aye, my little Aerin?" he smiled, that was the first time she
had ever called him Da. He wanted another child, so that maybe he could 
help a baby grow up. One that he could teach to talk, and then maybe 
lovingly hear the first word of Da. 
	She reached up, and hugged him. "I love you, Da. Please, 
don't ever lie to me again. Don't ever hide any thing." Conor didn't 
think he could. Now was the time to tell her everything. But, how 
could he ever tell her everything? 

	Later that night, as Aerin slept in her room, Molly watching
close by her, 
Katherine sat beside Conor, running a comb through her hair. Conor 
took it from her, doing it for her. "Conor, this is confusing. Aerin will be 
fourteen summers tomorrow. We're going to have to tell her everything 
sooner or later. She's getting older. Soon,  she'll completely be a 
woman." his hands started running down her back, and he tossed the 
comb to the ground. 
	"We'll tell her." he said. His hands kept going, in circles. He
seemed to know just where the pressure points were. Feeling more 
relaxed in each rub, she sighed.  His hands stopped around her neck, 
where he bent to kiss where he stopped. He was so confused, at first. 
She was so much like Caitlin. But she was more. She was  Katherine. 
Before he had married Caitlin, Katherine made herself noticed to him. 
It almost happened that he had married Katherine instead of Caitlin.
Something had happened, and he had chosed Caitlin. Now, although 
he loved Caitlin very much, he loved Katherine. Things were getting 
confusing, so confusing that he wouldn't try to sort them out until 
later. Now, he would go on instinct, He loved Katherine. She was
going to wear one of his big shirts to bed, that night. Even though it
was one that had shrunk after many wearings, it was still big on her. 
One of the shoulders was slipping off, and he bent to kiss where her 
shoulder met her neck. She closed her eyes, and imagined that 
everything was alright. He would make it all better. Everything 
would be alright. 
	Everything would be alright. She remembered that. He would 
make things better. Forgetting everything, even that, with the next kiss, 
delivered to the back of her shoulder blade, she turned her head, so that 
maybe her lips could receive some of the honey sweetness that Conor 
was giving the rest of her body. He cupped his hands around her face, 
and pulled her slightly closer. Stroking her blond hair back with his 
thumbs, he leaned closed, and for a moment just stared at her eyes. 
Any closer, she believed, she would go mad. She didn't dare breathe
until he moved, kissing her lips softly, ever so carefully, like she 
would break. His arms moved slowly down her neck, and to her 
shoulder blades, sending chills of fire and ice to her spine.
Afraid if she moved, he would stop, she sat there, only turning her
eyes. His brown ones looked like they were melting, so deep, little 
pools. Not thinking that he would notice,  she'd just drown in his eyes 
for a minute. 
	His own eyes didn't stray from her own. Thinking almost along
the same line,  he focused on her blue-green ones, snapping himself out 
of the impulse of thinking that this was not Katherine, but Caitlin. And 
his daughter, Aerin. They were all so much alike. They probably were 
out to get him, to scare him out of his wits. Where ever he looked, there 
she'd be. Remembering Aerin, he remembered Caitlin's death. She had 
just laid there, so helpless, so vunerable, so completely not herself,
and she had died, just to give him the beautiful daughter he knew as his 
own. The thought was very uncomfortable, that he just might be giving 
way to someone who looked exactly like his daughter, almost, and who 
looked so similar to Caitlin. Oh, Cat...he had betrayed her so much in the 
last thirteen, now fourteen years. Their daughter had not been their 
daughter until recently. He had broken down all defences and slept with
another woman, her SISTER, damn it all! Her sister, that was so 
beautiful, so talented, so almost the same as Caitlin. He wouldn't break 
his vows to her any longer. He had promised to her, and to himself that 
no matter what, she would be his final, true, and only love. She had
told him along the same lines right before she died. And now, she was
gone. She could keep her vows in death, but it was becoming hell to keep 
the vows in his life. 
	He pulled away from her, and looked away. He would not let 
her see him cry. A woman who saw him cry always had levety over him. 
He felt so...vunerable when he cried. His hand swatted away the tear that 
dripped down his face. Caitlin. Oh, God,  Caitlin. He found himself 
praying to this God of Caitlin's again, like it would help. Maybe
it would help. But it wouldn't bring her back, he knew that from the
months of weeping, praying, and trying to understand what happens 
when someone dies that all of that  didn't work. He knew that Caitlin 
wanted him to be happy. But happy with her sister?
Um, that'd be going a little too far. 
	"Conor, what's wrong?" she asked, her hand on his shoulder. 
Her hand was  still warm, more like scorching, on his shoulder. He 
winced away. "What did I do?"  she furrowed her brow in confusion. 
They had been getting intense. Had she done wrong? Had she not reacted 
the way he wanted? 
	"Its Caitlin. And you didn't do anything wrong. You did
everything right." he chuckled to himself. Like always, it was his fault. 
All  his fault. Her death had been.. his mistakes were all his fault. Even 
Katherine falling for him had been his fault. He  stood up, and tossed a 
tunic over his shoulders, rolling them to get any sore joints loosened. 
She couldn't help but stare at the broadness, how they were slightly 
tannedand looked like they were scratched up, and bruised, but she 
knew from experience that they definately were not. He strode out 
the door, without a further word. 

	Aerin woke up when she heard light footsteps come 
through the doorway. She decided that she would wait until she knew 
who this was before she'd 'wake' up, again. "Is she alright?" the man 
asked. She recognized him as her father. There was silence
between the first question and the next. She guessed that Molly, who
watched over her, had nodded. "Can I wake her?" he sounded worried. 
	Aerin knew Molly well enough to guess that she was 
frowning. "What is so important that a little one doesn't get the sleep 
she needs?" 
	"Something." was his reply. He bent down, and shook her ever 
so lightly. His hands were slightly hot. Wondering why, she curiously 
opened her eyes. 
	"Da?" she faked waking up. He smiled tenderly. 
	"Tis I." he said, his smile turning into a grin. "C'mon, I want
to show you something." he looked like he was feeling young again, for 
there was that grin of his, again, Molly would know it any where. 
	Aerin, still in her night gown, followed him out, her curly hair
just as messed up as her Da's. Both were bare foot, and the pair of them 
looked quite a sight. When she grinned, had her father's youthful grin 
that few saw any more. So much like her father.  She was at his 
shoulder, too, and looked like she could be his little sister, not his 
daughter. Conor didn't really look old enough to be a father, on that
night. 
	Aerin wound up at a mound. At the front was a stone. The
carvings on it were worn off with age. "What is this, father?" she 
wondered aloud. 
	He sat down beside her. "This is your mother's grave." he told
her.
	She looked at him carefully, and saw that a tiny tear was
welling on his chin bone. Her mother. Filled with awe and wonder, she 
asked, "What was my mother like?"
	He grinned again. "She was the most dear thing in the world to
me. She could shoot an arrow and hit the center without even looking at 
the target. She always knew what to say and when to say it. She was 
sweet. She always listened to your problems no matter what. And she 
was foolish enough to love me." he chose his words carefully, 
trying to make her exactly the way she really was. He couldn't say some
of the things  that he wanted. Like, "She was so special to me, and 
then you and me, we killed her." 
Never could he tell her that when she was born, her mother died.
	"Da, how did she die?" Aerin had to know this, and another
important question.
	"Well..." he paused, and looked at her. She would be fourteen
the next morning.  Also, he remembered Katherine's words: 'Soon, she'll 
be completely a woman. She'll have to know, then.' Now was as good a 
time as any. "While she was carrying you, she  got sick. I had gotten sick, 
then she got it from me, and well, later, when you were born,
she was too weak to live." there. That came out right. It was sounding
better, too. He  didn't kill her. Being weak did. But, he gave her the 
disease...oh, its alright, Conor. She loves you, that's all that matters. 
He'd repeat that over and over again. She loves you  still. 
	"Oh. And, Da, why did you have to send me away?" that 
question had bugged her ever since she knew that her father had sent 
her away. Why? Why? What had I  done? What had they done? 
	"I was afraid. Afraid you'd grow up and the Romans, who are
against us, you know, would try to hurt you. That you'd die before me. 
Afraid that if you got too much like your mother, it would hurt." he 
shook his head. "I should've had you there. Will you ever forgive me for 
letting you grow up like that?"
	"Aye. All is forgiven. We need to start over." she said. He
looked at her. She really meant it. He could tell from her eyes. Like her 
mother, she had expressive eyes.
	"I promised Katherine that I would tell you all this." he
admited, and wondered what her reaction would be.
	"Well, at least you told me the truth." she smiled at him. "I
love you, Da."








	Aerin yawned, and opened her eyes. Molly was sleeping in 
the chair beside her.
She giggled, the older woman looked like she was so worried. She 
nudged her, and Molly woke with a start. "Hmm? Aerin! You're 
awake! That was some bump on your head. You should be resting." 
	Aerin shook her head. "I'm fine. Besides, I'm four and ten,
now!" she grinned. Today was going to be great. Birthday celebrations 
were always fun, no matter who's they were.
Especially when someone turned four and ten, or five and ten, or six 
and ten. Those were when a child turned into a man or woman. 
	"Today is Samhain, child. I don't know how you celebrated 
it or your birthday, but here things are different. Especially with your 
father. If I remember anything of the past,  I remember that Conor has 
a lot of dead to remember and respect. There's Caitlin, and 
Claire, and his other and father, his brother, his brother's wife,
Shannon, and some others.
Things aren't really that happy for him, since your mother died on
Samhain. He told you how she died, didn't he?" she nodded, and pulled 
off her night shift.  She put on a gown, one of the ones she had worn on 
special occasions in Britannia. It was bright colored, and had ribbons 
trimming it. It had cost her foster father much to buy it.
Aerin was proud to wear it, now. Molly shook her head. 
	"You aren't going to wear that, are you?"
	"I'm respecting my mother. She'd like this dress. Da said that
she would want every one to be happy." she explained.
	"Really? Well, its kind of...improper when you wear such 
festive clothing. Every one wears plain clothes, like all white."
	Aerin sighed. "All right. I do want to fit in." she found a
white robe-gown in her things, and puled it over her head. "That 
better?" she wanted to sulk like a little girl, but she was older, now. 
There was no way she could do that. It was undignified to act
beneath your age. She left the little hut, and found her father by the
fire. He had a tiny candle in his hands, and was placing it in a ring of 
other candles. 
	She heard him say, "And for you, my beloved Caitlin. Please 
do not let Death visit us today. Do not let another one of us die." he 
lit the candle, and sat extremely still. The way he heeled his hands made 
her think that he was praying. She sat down beside him, and didn't say 
anything. He looked up at her, after a moment, and then smiled. "You're
four and ten years old, today." he would not cry today. No. It had been
fourteen years of crying. That was enough. This day wouldn't mark the 
year of more crying.
He'd remember Caitlin always, but they both agreed that this was enough 
crying. 
	"Aye, I am. What are these candles for?" she pointed to the ring
of candles. Others had candles, some more than others, but Conor had the 
most out. 
	"Each of these candles is a person that isn't with us any more."
he started pointing at candles. "This one is my mother. And my father. 
And my brother. And his wife. And Claire. And Shannon. And Glas. 
And this one is your mother's." he explained it plainly.
"We light candles for the dead. If one blows out, that means that that
soul will return to us. Some times it is just a visit. Other times it is that 
the soul will be born in another body. 
Caitlin's candle blew out the day she died, but we all knew it was for
you. We lit it right after she died. But, sometimes, the soul comes down 
to take another's life. The banshees warn us." he sighed. "Most think it 
is just superstition, now. Many of the people in the Sanctuary
are Christians, now." his eyes scanned the people surrounding the fire.
"The people here are the only ones that believe any more." he shook 
his head sadly, "And there aren't as many people that believe any more. 
It is horrible. With the Romans came Christianity. Its not that I have 
anything against it, Caitlin is a Christian, its just that no one remembers 
the old ways. If we are to get any where in getting our island back from 
the Romans, we will have to unite together again. We can't do that if 
everyone hates each other." 
	There was shocking reality to it. He felt like the Romans would
never leave. They'd always be fighting them. Until he died. Would they 
fight afterwards? Or would they give up because no one was leading it 
any more? What ever happened, he hoped that his people
would be better for it. 
	Suddenly, the candle he had just lit for Caitlin blew out. Both
father and daughter's eyes widened. "Uh oh." Aerin whispered. "If what 
you say is true, either Momma will come visiting, or someone 
will....die." As if to answer her question, an evil keening could be heard 
through out the Sanctuary. It was high pitched, and Conor remembered 
that the same sound was made when he met Shannon. Death was 
visiting. 
	"Caitlin, no!" he shouted, and they stood up. Conor looked
around, afraid to see some one dying in front of him. Molly had a 
stricken face, and she became pale. Her fingers which were curled 
around a mug of ale, tightened. A little moan seeped out of
her mouth, and she closed her eyes. Conor rushed to her side. "What 
is it, Molly?" he begged, feeling her heart beat. It was slow, and every 
beat seemed to get weaker and weaker.
He took the mug from her. "This is that stuff that that messenger 
brought us when Aerin came, isn't it?" he brought it up to his nose, 
and smelled it. "Ugh!" he coughed.
"It like someone put poison in it!" he shook his head. No. That 
couldn't have happened. No!
"It can't be. Molly,  you aren't going to die. You won't. This isn't 
happening." he ordered. But, she didn't seem to listen. Finally, the 
heart ceased to beat. Her arm was limp under his hand, and her chest
didn't heave to get air. He stood up. "I'm willing to bet who sent us
this poison."  no one needed to ask who he meant. The Romans 
were the only ones who were their present  enemies.

	Aerin wiped tears away from her cheeks, twisting her ring 
around on her finger. For her birthday, Molly died. She hadn't wanted 
ssome one else to die Death was such a forbidding word. Once dead, 
you couldn't live again. That didn't sound fun to Aerin. 
	"Da, who killed her? Please tell me!" she begged. 
	Conor shook his head. "I don't want you getting in to this. 
This is for me to settle. I really don't want my little girl getting in to 
this. You could get hurt." 
	Angry, she stamped a foot. "I'm not a little girl." 
	He sighed. "I think that the Romans did this." that was all 
she needed to hear. She started walking in the direction she knew to be 
the Roman fort. "Where are you going?" he demanded. 
	"I'm just going to visit Momma's grave, and beg her to take 
down the people who killed Molly." she told him. It was the first time 
she had ever lied to any one. It didn't feel very nice, either. She couldn't 
see how her father did so much of it.
	She walked aimlessly for a while, following horse tracks. She
saw a fort looming in the distance, and grinned. Her destiny lied there. 
She twisted the ring around again, remembering where she had gotten it. 
She had received it for her thirteenth birthday at a fort similar looking 
to this one. She walked to the gates, and commanded to the guards, in
the Latin that she had been schooled so carefully on, "Open the gates
for me."
	Since this lass knew Latin, they decided she could be no 
threat, and opened the gates. None of the people of Eire had proved 
smart enough to know Latin.
	She wandered around the inside of the fort until a mean 
looking woman came up to her. She had long black hair, and she looked 
evil. She wore the trendy clothing that her mother always wore. She 
was up to date with fashions even though she was in Eire. "And
who are you?" she asked, catching Aerin's shoulder.
	"I'm King Conor's daughter." she announced, holding her chin 
up proudly.
	"Ah, Conor's royal brat. Caitlin's child, I suppose?" she 
asked, and Aerin stared at her. 
	"And how did you know?" she demanded.
	"Child, I know more than you could imagine. I make it my
business to know who shares the bed with your father, and who gives 
him a child. I know your nurse maid recently gave in to the blond 
prince's, or rather, he's a king, now, charms."
	"If you know so much about me, then how did my mother 
die?" she glared at the woman who had spies so close to her home.
	"Girl, that is old news. She died giving birth to you. And if 
my guess is right, you are four and ten years old today, Aerin." she 
shrugged, dismissing this as common knowledge. Aerin couldn't 
believe this woman knew more about her than she did herself. This 
wasn't right. 
	"And did you poison Molly?" she had to know.
	"Molly? Oh yes, the Druid bitch." she smiled. "I poisoned 
her, yes. That was my pleasure. You see it helped, for I know how 
she looks on your father."
	That was enough. Aerin threw herself at the woman, and 
started kicking her. "You killed her! You horrible woman!" Diana 
pulled her back.
	She sighed. "I guess we are going to have to send you off 
to the prisons where your father should be living." she saw the ring 
on Aerin's finger. "What's this? Hm, this is interesting."
	"Where did you get this ring?" she demanded, looking at the 
own on her finger. 
	"None of your business." Aerin tried not to cry. The woman's
grip on her arm hurt.
	"Then I'll make it my business." she pulled on Aerin's hair, and
pulled on the girl's hair. "Tell me!"
	"All right!" Aerin shouted, and Diana loosened her grip. "From 
a Roman trade ship."
	"You stole it, you brat!" Diana accused.
	"No, I didn't! My foster father gave it to me!" she cursed 
under her breath in the other language. 
	"Interesting. What is your foster father's name, girl?" she
raised a perfect eyebrow, and tossed her hair.
	"Patricus. He's more powerful than you are." she announced
proudly. 
	"Hah!" the Roman Queen was amused. "Sure. I would like 
to see this man."
	"Don't hurt him!" she gasped, and Diana laughed.
	"Child, I wouldn't hurt someone who could help me." she 
shook her head, and called to a guard, "Guard! Take this girl to one of 
our rooms. Don't hurt her, but do what you will."

	Aerin blinked her eyes, and stared up at the figure looming
above her. She winced when she saw the figure was male. "No!" she 
cried out. She expected a blow to her bruised and bloody face,
but it was her father. "Da!" she nearly shouted. He put a hand to his
lips.
	"Diana is agreeing to a truce so that I can get you back home.
Why she's helping me, I don't think I'll ever know. What happened, 
lass?"  he was concerned. 
	She threw her arms around him, and sobbed. "Just take me 
home, Da." she begged. He nodded, and bore her away. At home, where 
the healer bandaged her lips and cheeks, repairing the cuts, he asked the 
question again. 
	This time, she answered. "Da, they used me." she whispered, 
and only then did Conor see the rips in her gown at her waist. 
	He clenched his jaw. "First they defile my country. Then they
abuse my wife. But to do this to my little daughter?" his eyes gleamed. 
"They're dead where they stand."

	Katherine smiled to herself, holding in a secret. She hummed a
lullaby under her breath, folding Conor's clothes to put into the chest. 
She pressed down the lid and slid her hands to her belly. They rested 
there, and she grinned to herself. Giddy almost, she went to find Conor.
There was good news to tell him. It would be good, and bad. 
	He was sitting by the fire. "Do you know what they did to
Aerin?" he asked, his fiery eyes focusing on her. She winced away from 
his glare, as if he had hit her. 
	"What did they do?" she asked him, afraid some what of the
answer.
	"They raped her." he spat out the words.
	"Goodness." she turned away. "I guess now isn't the best time 
in the world to tell you this."
	He shook his head, and softened the glare. "What is it?" 
	"Well, I have to tell you that..." she paused, and took his
hand. "I'm carrying your baby."
	That hit him like an arrow. Whoa! "Really?"
	"Truly." 
	He took her into his arms for a hug. "Then I have to care for
you. Will you marry me, so that it will be born in wedlock, if not 
conceived?" 
	She sighed. "As much as I would like to, Conor, the people 
care not about wedlock. I wouldn't marry you because you were guilty 
for something that wine played a judgement in."
	"I wasn't drunk, that night." 
	"We still shouldn't." 
	He looked towards Aerin's hut. "How are we going to 
tell her?" he asked Katherine. She shrugged. "I'm sure we'll think of 
something."

	Aerin took one look at the ring on her finger and threw it 
in to the fire. "You damn thing!" she raged. It was the first time she 
had used a curse word. It ate on her tongue and made her feel 
retched. It was a pretty bad feeling, for she still felt dirty after
what the Roman soldiers had done. A boy came in with the healer, to 
check on her. He was a tall lad, who looked about her age. His
hair was darker than she had seen before, almost, and his eyes were a
stunning blue. How odd!
	"What's your name?" she asked him.
	The healer smiled. "So, you're up! This lad is Bryan." she
introduced him. They had a lively conversation, until her Da and 
Katherine came in, looking serious and silly at the same time. 
	The healer and Bryan went out, and Conor sat on the edge 
of the bed. "Aerin, you know we love you, right?" he asked. She 
nodded. They were acting stupid. What was wrong? "Well,
Katherine is going to have a baby." 
	Aerin hadn't expected this.
	This was going too far. Since that one day back in Britannia,
she had found out that she didn't belong to her supposed father, and 
that her real father was in Eire, being the King. Also, she had 
learned that her mother died bearing her. She learned that her father
had a romantic interest in her nanny. She had caught them together. 
One of her respected elders had died. But now this?
	"Why did you do this to me?" she demanded. She wanted 
to get up and run, but the wound to her head was preventing it. 
	Katherine and Conor exchanged looks. "It just happened."
Katherine offered. "I love your father, and we're getting married." 
this shocked Conor, who widened his eyes. 
	"I thought you..." he mouthed, and she smiled up at him.
	Now, if them carrying a child had been an arrow, she'd now be
hit by some atmos. Married?! Conor took Katherine's hand, and Aerin 
turned away. "How could you?" Aerin's lip quivered. She 
wouldn't cry...the strong don't cry...what's that tear doing there? 
	"I have to support your half brother or sister." he told her,
and Aerin gulped back a sob. 
	"It's also my cousin." she pointed out. Katherine sat down
beside her. She took her hands, and turned Aerin's tear streaked face 
to her. 
	"You're almost a woman. You can deal with this. I'm going to
need your help with this baby. You're going to have to be strong."
	Aerin sighed, and laid back on the pillow. "Tell me when it's
over. I'm going to stay here till then. Tell me when the baby's grown 
up. Then, I'll crawl out of bed." 
	Conor shook his head. "Do you know how old you're 
acting? You're acting like a little girl. A wee lass." 
	This got her to sit up again. She put on a dress over her
undershift, and laced up her boots. "I'm not a little girl. I can handle 
this." Conor grinned. 
	"That's my girl."

	Diana let out a sigh, staring at herself in the water. She had
long since finished the bath, and it was cold, but she wanted to remain a 
while. "Why did I let her go?" she asked no one in general, and
as usual, the slaves that she had helping her bathe ignored her. 
	Longinus answered her. "Because you have a purpose for her." 
he answered. She was getting annoyed at this. He would come in and 
answer the questions that she didn't want answered. Turning
around, she looked up at him. The woman combing her hair pulled the 
comb sharply out, and scurried away. She knew that when her mistress 
was conversing with Longinus, there would be no need for her to have 
her hair done. She would be too busy.
	"Why do you keep all these people to do things for you? It 
makes you look helpless. The Queens here attend themselves. 
Occasionally, though, their Kings help them bathe, which normally
results in another member of the royal family." he commented coolly,
glancing at all the slaves gathered there. 
	"I can do it myself, but what other things are these slaves 
good for? I have to do something with the people of Eire that stumble 
into my hands."
	One of the slaves glanced up at Diana coldly, then scurried off
with the rest of the ladies.
	"Oh?" he chuckled. "I know many things you could do with 
them." 
	She shrugged. "Name one." 
	"You don't know, yourself? You are not very bright for a 
Queen." when she didn't dignify that with any response, he continued. 
"You could turn them loose."
	She laughed. "And have an army of former slaves forming? 
You know how that other one, what was her name....Cat something, 
Caitlin, reacted."
	"And now she's dead. In childbirth. How did that hurt you?" 
	"Her daughter."
	Longinus shook his head. The woman was getting tiring. 
"Why do we have the same arguments over and over again, all the 
time?" 
	She shrugged. 

	A month later, Aerin woke up and left her hut, to join the rest
of the Sanctuary at the fire. Katherine was weeping. Aerin sat beside her, 
and took her hand. 
	"What's wrong?" she asked. 
	Katherine sighed, and looked up at Aerin. "I lost the baby." she
hated to say it, but Aerin needed to know. Soon, the whole Sanctuary 
would know. It was better that Aerin learned it from her.
	"Does Da know?" she hoped that he did, for this wasn't a 
happy day. Aerin had just recently gotten used to the thought of a 
brother or sister. Katherine nodded. "He does."
	Bryan was sitting by them at the fireside. He overheard the
conversation, and saw how Aerin was beginning to get upset, so he 
decided to try to help out and cheer her up. He came up, and 
asked a question, "Aerin, I was just wondering if you would...uh...go
riding with me?" it came out fine, but he wanted to kick himself. It 
sounded bad to him. 
	Aerin stared up at him, and nodded. "I would love to, but 
you're going to have to teach me how."
	Bryan couldn't believe his luck. He could teach her! That 
meant that he could spend a lot more time with her. "I could. But how 
about if I just take you on my horse, for starters?" he asked. 
Sweet Brigit, please let her say yes!
	"Aye, I will ride with you." she responded. She ran off with
him, but Katherine stood up, and yelled after, "Make sure you come 
back before dark!" they seemed to want to ignore her. 

	After a long, hard ride, they stopped by the river to rest and
talk. He helped her down, and waited for her to sit down before he 
started talking. "Your Da, he's a really nice guy." 
	She nodded. "I'm sure your Da was, too."
	Bryan stared at the river, and answered softly. "He's dead. I
never knew him." 
	"Oh." she answered. "I'm sorry."
	"It's all right. You didn't know." he told her, and patted her
hand. "My mother is dead, too. She died shortly after I was born. The 
Romans killed my Da, and my Ma died cause of me." 
	Aerin looked up at him. "So did Momma." she offered. 
	"Then we have something in common. I'm older, though. Just 
a little less than a year." he looked at her for a moment, then continued. 
"They said that I was born the very same day that the Druid King died." 
	Aerin smiled. "That means that you might be the Druid King. 
You could, you know." she was bewildered. Why did every one who 
became of any relation have to become distant? If Bryan left
to be Druid King, he would have to leave. She had just met him!
	He shrugged. Then, he wondered aloud, "What was it like in
Britannia?"
	She, in turn, shrugged. "It was different. I was with the
Romans. I learned Latin, and I grew 
up thinking that I was Roman. That's all." 
	There was a rustling in the bushes, and...


	Conor rubbed just a little harder with the cloth, cleaning the
blade of his sword. This was his father's sword. He needed to keep it 
in good shape. Staring into the tiny fire kindled in the corner of the hut, 
he wondered about the recent events. So much had happened. So very
much. His daughter had stumbled upon something that he didn't want 
her to see *oh man, how she shouldn't've seen that, probably scarred 
her for life* she had run away, he found her, but she was hurt and he 
took her back. After a brush with death, she wanted to tempt fate a little
more, and after she found out that it was the Romans that killed Molly,
she went to the Roman fort to seek her own revenge. There, Diana 
herself had taken her captive. She had turned his daughter over to the 
guards, who had raped her. He had returned her back, only to tell her that
she was going to have a little brother or sister. And recently,
Katherine had gotten a miscarriage, ending the life of his future son or 
daughter. And ending what would have been a rocky marriage without 
love. It would be a support blanket for their child. That would be all.
	He was so confused, lately. Utterly and totally confused. It 
was not only young men that could get confused. He had been confused 
when he was young, and it was carrying over to his later years. Why 
had everything gone like this? Why, in the whole entire world full of
people did all of this have to happen to him? All he had wanted was 
to sail away with Claire and live a simple, easy life full of love and 
peace. But no. He wasn't ever given the luxury of a love that stayed. 
Ironically, all of the women he had loved, though it had only been few, 
had died about a year after returning the love. And it left him empty. 
There wasn't any thing to fill the void that Caitlin had left behind. Not 
even Katherine and Aerin and the whole Confederation could fill it. 
	Yet life still demanded him that he go on. It wasn't his time.
Not at all. There had been bad times and good times alike, but it wasn't 
over. No matter how hard he wished, it wasn't. The Romans would fall 
before I die, he vowed it. That day would come soon, he hoped. And  it
would, sooner than any one would've expected. 
	He stood up, and strode out. He saw that Katherine's normal 
spot by the fire was vacant, so he guessed that she was else where. 
Conor yawned, and headed for the waterfall. He wanted a bath. Baths 
always seemed to comfort him. There, he slipped out of his clothes,
and swam vigorously in the water. He went under, and swam until he
thought his lungs would burst. He surfaced, and shook the water from 
his hair, droplets of water streaming down his face. The water was cold, 
but it was indeed comforting. It woke him up, preparing him for more
shock. The day would probably bring more of it. The last few months 
had brought plenty of it.
	After swimming a few laps and ducking under again, he got 
out. The only thing that he figured he needed now was some hot food. 
After pulling his pants back on, he walked back in the direction of the 
fire. He laced the tunic up as he walked. When he came to the fire, 
Katherine was there, feeding fire with the baby clothes that she had
started to make. He stopped her, just as she was tossing the second 
piece of clothing into the fire. "Someone else could use them." he told 
her. She looked up at him, tears gleaming in her eyes. 
	She stroked the hair out of his face, fingering a curl. "You're
all wet. And it's freezing out here. You'll get sick." 
	He shook his head, resulting in getting a little water on her,
too. "No I won't. Where's Aerin?" 
	She shrugged. "Somewhere off with that lad Bryan."
	He grinned. "Found her a lad, huh? Well, Bryan is a good choice,
I guess. He's showing to be a good warrior. And I have to admit that his 
face isn't that bad, either."
	Katherine giggled. "I guess Bryan should take that as a
compliment." she sighed. "We're getting old. Aerin, who's your little 
baby, is all ready old enough to be married."
	He took her hand, and sighed. "Aye, aren't we. About fifteen 
or sixteen years of  Romans. You'd think they would've left by now."
	Katherine shrugged. "I'm no priestess or novice, but I think it
won't be that long before the Romans leave. Why else would Diana give 
you Aerin back like that? She may have done damage, but she's getting 
old, too. I hear that Longinus pays her no attention, any more. 
And there's been word that there's trouble in Rome."
	Conor sighed. "I sure hope that they do leave, soon. Many 
of our people are becoming half Roman. I sure hope that my little girl 
doesn't have to go through that, and I'm ever so thankful that Caitlin 
didn't have to do that, either." 

** To be continued **
As usual, please send all comments/questions/requests/rants privately
to:
jenross@win32supportbbs.vnet.net
Tank'e!
Gwen 
~=**=~