Announcer: Now we bring you "An Hour with Hil--" Hold on one moment. I have just been notified that WENN is now broadcasting a top-secret and very illegal episode of "The WENN Files." We now join Sherwood and Roberts outside the storage closet.
Sherwood: Roberts, let's get into the storage closet now. Someone might see us here and get suspicious.
Roberts: But why? I thought Vic- I mean Assistant Director Comstock had shut down "The WENN Files."
Sherwood: Never! The truth IS out there - and I will do anything to broadcast. (A door opens and is slammed shut.)
Roberts: Sherwood! (sigh) Quit shoving me around. Okay, okay. But just this one episode.
Sherwood: Our first question tonight comes from Curious in Chicago, IL. "First, I'd like to say that I love the WENN Files show. Now, I have a question for the both of you. Sherwood, were you walking Roberts to the trolley in the second episode of this season, or were you just walking out together?"
Roberts: What does that mean, second episode?
Sherwood: (condescendingly) I think he or she means that time when we were walking out together and ran into Mr. Eldridge.
Roberts: Oooh. Why don't you answer, Sherwood.
Sherwood: Well, as much as Roberts here would like to deny it, we weren't walking to the trolley. We were going to the Buttery for an intimate dinner for two.
(sound of a punch) OW! Roberts! Have you been taking boxing lessons from Victor?
Roberts: Well, Curious, let me further enlighten you. (Door opens)
Asst. Director Comstock: What do we have here? Betty, what are you doing in the closet with Sherman?
Roberts: Sherwood.
Asst. Director Comstock: Well, despite your unethical attempts to keep "The WENN Files" on the air, it appears that Sherwood here has better connections than I do. You're back on the air. But Sherwood, I would avoid Hilary for the next few hours. (The door slams shut.)
Roberts: Well, I guess we're back then. Let's move on to another question. This is from Laura Astorian of Atlanta, Georgia. She asks, "Sherwood, could you answer me a quick question: What exactly is it that Mr. Elderige does (besides the whole obvious thing)? Thanks!"
Sherwood: Mr. Eldridge. You might remember him better as Eldridge, Tom Eldridge. He was a major spy for England during World War I. His demeanor - bumbling and a bit dim - would often fool the Germans into trusting him. After a hefty retirement payment, he retired to New York. But his money was quickly squandered on Broadway and he was forced to become a doorman in vaudville. Now Mr. E works here...doing something. Roberts, what does Mr. E do?
Roberts: Hmmm. I'm not sure. But he's extremely valuable in his position. We would miss him too much if he were to leave.
Sherwood: Okay...we have time for one more question. This final question comes from Mallory of Fort Worth, Texas. She asks, "Why on EARTH do they keep the Exciting Bald Nazi Spy, Vic-man, on the show?"
Roberts: I'll take this one, Sherwood. (defensively) You've answered your own question. He's exciting! He was a American double agent! He is a war hero already, before the US has even gotten into the war. (puzzled) I never heard him called 'Vic-man' before. A new nickname, maybe?
Sherwood: (unconvinced) Since we're running out of time, I won't comment on this question. Next time, Mallory, I'll give you a real answer.
Announcer: Stay tuned next week to another exciting adventure of "The WENN Files." Next time Sherwood and Roberts will answer the burning question: Where did C.J. go?