CHARACTERS
ERIC CARTMAN:
He is the fat kid who everyone makes fun of because of his weight. He has a cat named Kitty and a pet pig. He never stops eating cheesypoofs, snackey cakes and chocolate chicken pot pies. 
KYLE BROFSLOVSKI:
He is a Jewish kid who's little brother gets abducted by aliens. Cartman is constantly making fun of him because he is Jewish and that he can't get Christmas presents. 
STAN MARSH:
He is the one who gets bashed up by his bigger sister. He has a gay dog called Sparky. After a boat ride at Big Gay Al's, he realises that it's okay to be gay. 
KENNY MCKORMICK:
A poor kid who gets killed one way or another every episode (except Christmas). Cartman is continueously making fun of him and his family because he is so poor. 
CHEF:
Chef of the school cafeteria. Every episode he sings a song that starts out to being about one thing but ends up being about love. 
MR GARRISON:
The children's screwed up teacher. It is rumoured that he's homosexual. He has a puppet called Mr Hat that "lives" on his hand and makes him do crazy things. 
IKE:
Kyle's little brother. Kyle beats up the baby but he really likes him deep down inside. He is adopted and that's why he has the bouncing head (All Canadians have a bouncing head). 
SHELLY:
She's Stan's big sister who always bashes him up. 
WENDY TESTABURGER:
A twisted little girl who has a crush on Stan. 
PIP:
An English boy that everybody picks on. He also has the most annoying voice. 
MR HANKY:
The Christmas poo who comes out of the toilet and gives presents to every kid that has enough fibre in their diet. 
MAYOR:
She doesn't know anything. All she cares about is good publicity for the town. 
UNCLE JIMBO:
Stan's uncle who fought in the Vietnam War. Owns a local firearm store. 
NED:
Uncle Jimbo's war partner who got his arm blown off and has an electrolarynx because he lost his voice box from smoking. 
OFFICER BARBRADY:
The idiotic dumbass police officer who is there not to withstand the law. 
MOFESTO:
The insane genetic engineer who created the four assed monkey, mutant Stan, pissed off turkeys and other things. A little monkey looking creature always follows him around. 
MRS CARTMAN:
She is always ready to feed Cartman with cheesypoofs, snackey cakes and chocolate chicken pot pies. She is a hermaphrodite which means that she is a female with male organs. 
MR MARSH:
The local geologist who doesn't know the first thing about geology. 
MRS BROFSLOVSKI:
Kyle's mom who is a stuck up bitch and has to complain about everything. She ruins Christmas in South Park. 
MR MAKEY:
The school counseller who in one episode, gets fired for handing pot out to the children. 
STARVIN MARVIN:
A starving Ethenopian that the boys adopt. He was sent instead of a sports watch and Cartman was sent back instead of him. 
JESUS:
Son Of God and has his own cable TV show called Jesus and Pals. He answers peoples phone calls and later starts a Ricki Lake type show. He gets in a fight with Satan and Santa.
MRS CRABTREE:
She is the lunatic bus driver. She is partly deaf and the kids like to take advantage of that. 
GRANDPA MARSH:
Stan's grandfather who wants Stan to kill him because he hates being old. 
BIG GAY AL:
Owns Big Gay Al's Animal Sanctuary, a place for unwanted homosexual pets. He teaches people that it is okay to be gay. 
SCUZZLEBUTT:
Lord of the mountains. Has a celery stick for an arm and Patrick Duffy for a leg. He saves the boys from a volcano but Stan ends up shooting him to prove his bravery. 
SPARKY:
Stan's homosexual dog. Goes to Big Gal Al's Animal Sanctuary when Stan stops appreciating him. 
TERRANCE:
Part of the smash hit Canadian TV show Terrance and Phillip, the childrens favourite program. They also star in their own movie. 
PHILLIP:
Part of the smash hit Canadian TV show Terrance and Phillip, the childrens favourite program. They also star in their own movie. 
MISS ELLEN:
The lesbian substitute teacher. She gets shot into the center of the sun at the end of the episode.