Searching for "Mr. Right"

My oldest daughter hasn't started to date yet, although by the time this
goes to press, there's no telling whether we will have entered that
phase in her life.  As a father, I am in no hurry for her to have some
young man supplant me as the apple of her eye.
 
I read somewhere that girls who have a strong, positive male role model,
especially in a father, have the best chance of not succumbing to the
temptations of teenage sexuality.  Such girls postpone dating until
later in their teens because they have been given love and a greater
sense of worth by their father.  Conversely, a weak, neglectful, or
abusive father is a contributing factor to early dating and many social
problems that come from looking for love in all the wrong places.
 
A good father models a loving relationship with his wife and by these
interactions, children of both genders will be "trained in the way that
they should go." Our children have seen us in conflict, but they also
have seen us resolve a problem by attacking the problem and not each
other.  Children can learn how to handle relationships at many levels by
observing how to live in unity, despite conflict and unique
personalities.  Perhaps most importantly, they should see a mom and dad
who openly demonstrate affection to each other and to them.
 
I treasure each of my three daughters (and my son) and guard their
affections jealously.  Yet I know that my turn will come to gradually
give them over to the care and affections of another.  In anticipation
of this, I have given my daughter a two-part piece of advice regarding
her choice of a good boyfriend (and someday her soul mate):
 
1.  He has to like himself.  A boy who does not like himself does not
know how to treat himself as God's creation.  He also will not know how
to treat my daughter.  Self-pity and abasement can lead to dependency
situations or even abuse.
 
2.  He has to like her more than he likes himself.  A boy who is
conceited will give my daughter a relationship that is empty and
one-sided.  Selfishness is opposed to the biblical model of esteeming
others ahead of oneself
 
Romans 12:3 sheds light on the balance we are to have.  "Every
man... [should] not think of himself more highly than he ought to think;
but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the
measure of faith."  Humility is a matter of clear perception of who we
are in God's eyes; no more, no less; not more highly, (nor more lowly),
as we ought to think, but just right.
 
When a young man holds the balance between liking himself, and liking my
daughter more than he likes himself, then maybe Miranda (and I) can have
a bit more confidence in their relationship.  Naturally, I can wait for
Mr. Right a little longer, and I am glad she can wait, too.