It is important to note here that Jesus’ parents did everything required by their religion regarding their son’s upbringing. These two verses show us a few things that we should examine more closely
Simply knowing something does not make a person wise. Wisdom is the
proper application of knowledge. Foolishness is the improper application
of knowledge.
This is where parent come into a child's life. It isn't enough
to teach things but to teach how to apply knowledge properly; that is to
say, instill values of right and wrong.
True knowledge is an essential ingredient in our faith foundation. The truths of Scripture need to be heard by our children.
But as for you, continue in what you have learned and become convinced
of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy
you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for
salvation in Christ Jesus.
II Timothy 3:14, 15
This tells us that it is important for children to grow in their ability to apply their knowledge fruitfully and live effectively as they mature in their Christian faith.
We want our children to struggle with the realities of how the truth
they know must be lived out in their lives. Like mother birds who encourage
their offspring to fly, we too must encourage our children to experience
the freedom and joys of applying Biblical truths in our lives.
Even at young ages, our children have exhibited manners; respect for their elders and for others (Emily tied the shoe of a retarted boy. Jessica befriends an unpopular person at school.)
1. If our children were learning and growing in the aspect mentioned
in the verse, what behaviors would we expect to see?
2. How can we effectively teach our children in the aspects mentioned?
What this verse does tell us is that whatever good we endeavor to make of ourselves. everything starts by putting God first. A good marriage starts by putting God first in it; good parenting begins with putting God in charge of your children.
If our children are taught that God is our primary concern in life, we can expect their behavior to reflect interest in the things of God, His Word, participating in prayer, and enjoying His creation. The children will develop a sharing and giving attitude, contrary to the taking, selfish attitude that is all too natural.
What we must do as parents is ensure that our model shows that we put God first. We must be able to talk casually with our children about spiritual things. We, as parents, must (1) demonstrate the giving attitude, (2) hold our material possession loosely and (3) tenaciously grasp our spiritual heritage and treasures.
We must provide a heritage for our children; familiarize them with our value structures and beliefs in a loving God.
We must spend time with our children; time to talk with our children. We can talk about the gifts that God gives and the grandeur of His creation. (Talk about "quality time" with "steak" illustration. "It isn't the quantity; it's the quality.")
Children will learn to encourage others rather than criticize and gossip which is destructive.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful in building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29
Children need to display very early that they know when to say, "I’m
sorry."
As parents, if we do not model these very behaviors, we cannot expect
that our children will exhibit them.
Do we empathize with others? With our children? How quick are we to give ourselves to their needs with support and a helping hand?
Do our children observe us gossiping or criticizing rather than speaking of the good things about others? Our children will learn from our behavior.
Do you have a good self-image? Created by God in His image!
Do you and your mate tell each other that you are sorry in front of the children? Our children need to see our humble and forgiving spirits to develop theirs properly.
Do we notice the good things that our children do and then tell them that we’ve noticed? This is not just for them; they will learn to notice and tell others about the good things they see in others.
Children will learn self-control, handling and managing their emotions (specifically outbursts of anger and temper tantrums), and putting other’s wants and needs before their own.
Parents should not positively reinforce temper tantrums and outbursts. Many parents make a mistake by cuddling their child when the outburst occurs, or reward them by giving them the thing they wanted that brought on the tantrum. Avoid this like the plague, parents!
Parents should start early with enlisting the help of children around the house. John Reilly pointed out that years ago, big families were needed to help tend the fields. Giving children responsibility according to their level of development, helps them to develop into responsible adults; getting work done when work is to be done, and play after the task is finished. The need for learning responsibility has not gone away just because we are not on farms! I tell my kids "with privilege comes responsibility!"
If our children are taught to fear God and keep his commandments, we can expect behaviors that exhibit respect for authority, and living a life that is consistent with the law (no stealing, lying, cheating, jealousy, and covetousness).
Luke 2:51 says that Then [Jesus] went down to Nazareth with [his par-ents] and was obedient to them.
Children begin to understand the concept of sin through an understanding of proper authority. They will also learn of the consequences of sin, especially in the separation of relationships that sin causes-especially the separation between them and Jesus.
Children will show increasing willingness to act in accordance with their conscience.
As parents, if we do not submit to proper authority, especially to the authority of Christ, we mark our children with the spirit of rebellion. Our children need to see us submit to each other in our marriage.
As parents, we make errors in child-rearing, and when we recognize this, we need to submit ourselves our children and ask for their forgiveness. This applies to parents and children, no matter how old they’ve gotten.
Parents need to discipline their children when disobedience occurs. When this is neglected, the children do not learn respect or good attitudes towards proper authority. This is not just to make our children good citizens in society but also to enable them to submit to the authority of Christ’s loving leadership.
Proper discipline also teaches children that transgression is met with consequences. To fail to teach them this means that we risk eternity with our children and a Just God who will judge all of us one day.
Next Week:
Temperaments in Children and Parents