The marriage of Francois Soubirous and Louise Casterot produced six children. The eldest of these was Bernadette. She was born of 7th January 1844, and was baptised the next day by the Abbe Forgues in the old parish church, being given the name Marie Bernarde. Because of her small stature, she was always referred to by the diminutive form of the name, Bernadette. Six months later, Louise was again expecting a child; because of this, Bernadette was entrusted to the care of a woman in near-by Bartres, Marie Aravant, who had just lost a baby boy. She stayed there for fifteen months. From her birth, Bernadette was a weak child, suffering even then from the asthma which would cause her so much suffering that later, in the convent, she would beg the nuns to tear open her chest that she might breathe. Because of her delicate constitution, her parents would endeavour to give her little morsels of food not available to the other children, such as white bread instead of black. Invariably, the young girl would share these treats with her siblings - often missing out herself on the sumptuous feast. When she was ten, Bernadette was again seperated from her beloved family; the winter of 1855 was exceptionally cold and there was little work for the poor miller. Louise's sister, Bernarde, offered to take Bernadette for a while to relieve the pressure on the family and to minimise the effects of the cold on Bernadettes' health. She stayed with her aunt Bernarde for seven months, until the weather improved sufficiently and there was more work available for Francois, enabling him to feed his family properly. Bernadette left Lourdes one more time - in summer of 1857, she returned to stay with Marie Aravant for a few months, working for her as a shephardesst. There was also a great affection between the two. Bernadette celebrated her fourteenth birthday here in Bartres, but still there had been no mention of her making her First Holy Communion; Marie Aravant tried to teach Bernadette about the Faith - but described her as being thick-headed; "It was useless to for me to repeat my lessons; I always had to begin again. Sometimes I was overcome by impatience and I would throw my book aside and say to her, 'Go along, you will never be anything but a little fool'". Marie asked the priest for advice - he said Bernadette should return to Lourdes to begin her Catechism classes. And so, in the early days of 1858, Bernadette returned to the Rue des Petits Fosses. And return, she did. She visited a local grotto.

The Apparitions to Bernadette

First Apparition

Thursday 11 February 1858. At half past twelve on a cold February day, Mary, the Mother of God, descended from Heaven who met our little shepherdess in a lonely grotto. The meeting was entirely unexpected. Who could possibly describe the following scene better than Bernadette herself? "The Thursday before Ash Wednesday it was cold and the weather was threatening. After our dinner, our mother told us there was no more wood in the house and she was vexed. My sister Toinette and I, to please her, offered to go and pick up dry branches at the riverside. My mother said no, because the weather was bad and we might be in danger of falling into the Gave. Jeanne Abadie, our neighbour and friend, who was looking after her little brother in our house and who wanted to come with us, took her brother back to his house and returned the next moment telling us that she had leave to come with us. My mother still hesitated, but seeing that there were three of us, she let us go. We took first of all the road which leads to the cemetary, by the side of which wood shavings can sometimes be found. That day we found nothing there. We came down by the side which leads near the Gave and having arrived at the Pont Vieux we wondered if it would be best to go up or down the river. We decided to go down and taking the forest road we arrived at Merlasse. Then we went into Monsieur de la Fittes field, by the mill of Savy. "As soon as we had reached the end of this field, nearly opposite the grotto of Massabieille, we were stopped by the canal of the mill we had just passed. The current of this canal was not strong for the mill was not working, but the water was cold and I for my part was afraid to go in. Jeanne Abadie and my sister, less timid than I, took their sabots in their hands and crossed the stream. However, when they were on the other side they called out that it was cold and bent down to rub their feet and warm them. All this increased my fear and I thought that if I went into the water I should get an attack of asthma. So I asked Jeanne, who was bigger and stronger than I, to take me on her shoulders. 'I should think not!' she answered - 'If you won't come, stay where you are!'. "After the others had picked up some pieces of wood under the grotto, they disappeared along the Gave. When I was alone, I threw some stones into the water to give me a foothold, but it was no use. So I had to make up my mind to take off my sabots and cross the canal as Jeanne and my sister had done. "I had just begun to take off my first stocking when suddenly I heard a great noise like the sound of a storm. I looked to the right and to the left, under the trees of the river, but nothing moved; I thought I was mistaken. I went on taking off my shoes and stockings, when I heard a fresh noise like the first. Then I was frightened and stood straight up. I lost all power of speech and thought when, turning my head toward the grotto, I saw at one of the openings of the rock a bush - only one - moving as if it were very windy. Almost at the same time, there came out of the interior of the grotto a golden coloured cloud, and soon after a Lady, young and beautiful, exceedingly beautiful, the like of whom I had never seen before, came and placed herself at the entrance of the opening, above the rose bush. She looked at me immediately, smiled at me and signed to me to advance, as if She had been my Mother. All fear had left me, but I seemed to know no longer where I was. I rubbed my eyes, I shut them, I opened them; but the Lady was still there continuing to smile at me and making me understand that I was not mistaken. Without thinking of what I was doing I took my Rosary in my hands and went on my knees. The Lady made with Her head a sign of approval and Herself took into Her hands a Rosary which hung on Her right arm. When I attempted to begin the Rosary and tried to lift my hand to my forehead, my arm remained paralysed, and it was only after the Lady had signed Herself that I could do the same. The Lady left me to pray all alone; She passed the beads of Her Rosary between Her fingers but She said nothing; only at the end of each decade did She say the Gloria with me. "When the recitation of the Rosary was finished, the Lady returned to the interior of the rock and the golden coloured cloud disappeared with Her". When asked to describe the Lady of the vision, Bernadette said - "She has the appearance of a young girl of sixteen or seventeen. She is dressed in a white robe, girdled at the waist with a blue ribbon which flows down all along Her robe. She wears upon Her head a veil which is also white; this veil gives just a glimpse of Her hair and then falls down at the back below Her waist. Her feet are bare but covered by the last folds of Her robe except at the point where a yellow rose shines upon each of them. She holds on Her right arm a Rosary of white beads with a chain of gold shining like the two roses on Her feet." Bernadette then continued with her story - "As soon as the Lady had disappeared Jeanne Abadie and my sister returned to the Grotto and found me on my knees in the same place where they had left me. They laughed at me, calling me an imbecile and asked me if I would go back with them or not. I now had no difficulty in going into the stream and I felt the water as warm as the water used for washing plates and dishes. 'You had no reason to make such an outcry' I said to Jeanne and my sister Marie, while drying my feet; 'the water of the canal is not as cold as you would make me believe'. They replied, 'You are fortunate not to find it so - we found it very cold'. "I asked Jeanne and Marie if they had noticed anything at the Grotto - 'No', they answered. 'Why do you ask us?'. 'Oh, nothing' I replied indifferently. But before we got to the house, I told my sister Marie of the extraordinary things which had happened to me at the Grotto, asking her to keep it a secret. "Throughout the whole day, the image of the Lady remained in my mind. In the evening, at family prayer, I was troubled and began to cry. My mother asked what was the matter. Marie hastened to answer for me and I was obliged to give the account of the wonder which had come to me that day. 'These are illusions' answered my mother - 'You must drive these ideas out of your head and especially not go back to Massabieille'. "We went to bed but I could not sleep. The face of the Lady, so good and gracious, returned incessantly to my memory and it was useless to recall what my mother had said to me; I could not believe that I had been deceived".

Second Apparition

Sunday 14 February 1858. From that day forward, little Bernadette could think of only one thing - the beautiful Lady she had seen. Her normally fun-loving nature had become grave and serious. Louise continued to tell her daughter that she had to be mistaken - Bernadette did not argue, but she could not believe that she had been the prey of an illusion. Even her mothers warning that this may have been a trick of the devil seemed impossible - how could Satan carry a Rosary and pray the Gloria? On the Friday and the Saturday, Bernadette intimated her desire to return to Massabieille - her mother ignored her pleas. On Sunday, Bernadette heard within her soul a summons, calling her once more to a meeting with the beautiful Lady of the rock. She told Marie of this, who in turn mentioned it to Madame Soubirous, who again refused permission. Jeanne Abadie then pleaded the cause. Finally, Louise relented and gave permission - after all, if this was an illusion, it would prove itself to be so. Bernadette had told no-one outside the family what had occurred on Thursday. Marie, on the other hand, had not been so reserved. Several of the local young girls knew the secret. These girls were then summoned by Marie to come to Massabieille. Bernadette armed herself with a small phial of Holy Water and left for the Grotto. As soon as she arrived at the grotto, she fell to her knees opposite the niche, and began to pray. Almost immediately, she exclaimed - "There She is! There She is!" One of the girls present told Bernadette to throw Holy Water on the Lady, in case it really was Satan. Bernadette did as requested. "She is not angry", she related, "On the contrary, She sanctions it with Her head and is smiling at all of us". The girls knelt around their little companion and began to pray. Bernadette then fell into ecstasy; her face completely transfigured and radiating happiness. Her expression was indescribable. Just then a stone fell from the top of the Grotto, causing alarm among the girls. It was Jeanne - having been left behind, this was her revenge. Bernadette showed no reaction. The girls called to her, but she was unaware of their presence, her eyes remaining fixed on the niche. Thinking she was dead, the other girls began to cry out; their cries were heard by two of the Nicolau women from the Savy mill, who ran to the Grotto; seeing the ecstatic Bernadette, they called to her, attempted to move her, covered her eyes - all to no avail. Madame Nicolau then ran to get her son, Antoine, a young man of twenty eight years. Believing this to be some kind of joke, he came to the Grotto and could not believe the sight he found there. He said later - "Never had I seen a more marvellous sight. It was useless for me to argue with myself - I felt I was not worthy to touch the child". Urged by his mother, Antoine gently pulled Bernadette away from the Grotto, leading her toward the Savy mill. All the way there, Bernadettes eyes remained fixed a little in front and above of her. It was only upon her arrival at the mill that she once more returned to earth, her ecstatic expression gradually disappearing and her face becoming once more that of the simple millers daughter. The Nicolaus then asked Bernadette what she had seen and she related what had occurred at the Grotto; again she had prayed the Rosary accompanied by the Lady, who moved Her lips only at each Gloria, and who had again disappeared at the conclusion of the prayers. By now, Louise Soubirous had been summoned to the Savy Mill. She was crying, thinking her little child was dead. She was angered to find Bernadette sitting telling her story; "So, you want to make us a laughing stock! I'll give it to you with you hypocritical airs and graces and stories of the Lady!". She was prevented from striking the child by Madame Nicolau, who cried - "What are you doing? What has your child done to be treated like this? It is an angel, and an angel from Heaven that you have in her - do you hear? I shall never, never forget what she was at the Grotto!" Madame Soubirous burst into tears once more, worn out with emotion and frustration. She then led the young girl home. On the way, Bernadette occasionally glanced behind her.

Third Apparition

Thursday 18 February 1858. The girls who had been present returned to Lourdes and began to describe the extraordinary sight they had witnessed. Few people believed them. But not everyone laughed. Antoinette Peyret was a leading light in the Children of Mary, in Lourdes. Desperate to know more of what was happening, she found all sorts of excuses for visiting the Soubirous family. Each time she would question the little one about what she had seen. The answers never changed. Upon hearing Bernadette describe the beautiful Lady, Antoinette was moved to tears; she believed this was her friend Elisa Latapie, who had been the president of the Children of Mary before her untimely death a few months beforehand. Accompanied by her friend Madame Millet, Antoinette arrived at the Cachot in time to hear Bernadette pleading with her mother to be allowed to return once more to the Grotto. Louise was stern in her replies to Bernadette. This seemed to be the perfect opportunity for the pair to ask permission to be allowed to take the child to the Grotto, where they promised they would let no harm come to her. After some soul-searching and many tears, Louise granted their request. The following morning, before dawn began to light the sky, the two ladies called at the Cachot. After collecting Bernadette, the trio left to attend Mass in the church. Following this, they left for the Grotto. Madame Millet carried with her a blessed candle, which she used to burn on special feast days. Antoinette Peyet took with her a pen and paper, hoping the mysterious Lady would write some messages for them. Arriving at the Grotto, Bernadette ran on ahead. By the time the two older ladies caught up with her, she was already on her knees in prayer, her Rosary in her hand. The candle was lit and the two women knelt also. After a few minutes, Bernadette exclaimed "She comes! Here She is!". The two women could see nothing, but Bernadette was captivated by the sight she beheld. Bernadette was happy and smiling, occasionally bowing her head. However, she gave no sign of ecstasy on this occasion. Since the Lady was about to speak, it was important that the child retain full use of her faculties. After the completion of the Rosary, Antoinette handed Bernadette the pen and paper. "Please, ask the Lady if She has anything She wishes to tell us and in that case if She would be so good as to write it down". As the child moved toward the opening, the two ladies also moved forward; without looking back, Bernadette signaled to them to remain where they were. Standing on tip toe, she held up the pen and paper. She appeared to listen to words addressed to her, then lowered her arms, made a deep bow and returned to the place she just left. Antoinette asked what the Lady had replied. "When I presented the pen and paper to Her She began to smile. Then without being angry She said 'There is no need for me to write down what I have to say to you'. Then She seemed to be thinking for a moment and added 'Will you be so kind as to come here every day for fifteen days?' " "What did you answer?" asked Madame Millet. "I answered 'Yes'" said the child in all simplicity. Asked why this request had been made, Bernadette replied, "I do not know - She did not tell me". Madame Millet asked why Bernadette had signed to them to stay where they were. The child said this had been done in obedience to the Lady. Somewhat distressed, Madame Millet asked Bernadette to enquire of the Lady if their presence was disagreeable to Her. Bernadette raised her eyes to the niche, then turned and said - "The Lady answers, 'No, her presence is not disagreeable to Me' ". Once more the three began to pray. Bernadette's prayers were frequently interrupted - she seemed to be having a conversation with the invisible Lady. At the end of the vision, Antoinette asked Bernadette if the Lady had told her anything else. Bernadette replied - "Yes. She said to me, 'I do not promise to make you happy in this world, but in the next'." "Since the Lady consents to speak to you," enquired Antoinette, "why do you not ask Her for Her name?". Bernadette replied that she had already done so. Asked what Her name was, the young girl replied - "I do not know. She lowered Her head with a smile, but She did not answer."

Fourth Apparition

Friday 19 February 1858. Hearing Bernadette relate what had occurred, her parents were distressed - not least of all by the strange promise made by the mysterious Lady. Until now, they had thought this was simply the product of a child's imagination... But now the Lady had spoken - and what words! If this was a real Lady, then who could it be? They considered that the child's description matched that of the Queen of Heaven. They immediately discounted this as a possibility; Bernadette was not worthy of such a grace. And the Mother of God would surely not appear in such a lowly place as the Grotto of Massabieille. Was it perhaps a souls from Purgatory? Or - most terrifying of all - was it the evil one? Why would She give no name? What did this mean? They sought the advice of the wise Aunt Bernarde. "If the vision is of Heavenly nature," said Bernarde, "we have nothing to fear. If it is some trickery of the devil, it is not possible that the Virgin should allow a child who trusts Her with such innocence of heart to be deceived. Moreover, we ourselves have done wrong in not going to Massabieille with her to see what is really taking place there. This we must do before anything else and then we shall be able to form an opinion based upon the facts themselves and decide upon a future line of action." And so, the next morning, Bernadette was accompanied to the Grotto by both her parents and by her aunt, again leaving the house before dawn. Despite the precautions they took to remain unseen, some neighbors did see the small group - and began to follow. Eight people arrived at the Grotto along with the Soubirous. Bernadette knelt and began her Rosary. All present noted how impressively this was made. Moments later her plain face was transfigured and illuminated; she no longer belonged to the world. Louise had already heard how Bernadette's countenance was changed in the presence of the Lady - but still she found the change hard to believe. The ecstasy lasted thirty minutes, after which Bernadette rubbed her eyes and appeared as one waking from a sleep. She remained happy after the conclusion of the vision. On the way home, Bernadette said that the Lady had expressed Her satisfaction at the child's fidelity to her promise to return to the Grotto; She also said that later She would reveal secrets to the child. Bernadette also related that during the vision, she had heard loud, quarreling voices, which had seemed to rise up out of the river, telling her to escape. The Lady also heard the commotion; She had simply raised Her eyes in the direction of the voices, which were then seized with fear and began to disperse, finally fading away altogether. No one paid much attention to this incidental detail at the time - only much later did they recall what Bernadette had told them that morning.

Fifth Apparition - Please go to the next page.