raw

WWF RAW IS WAR
June 21, 1999
By: Craig Allen

WWF-THE LEADER-ATTITUDE baby!

Welcome to RAW. Opening montage reviews the turmoil in the Corporate
Ministry, including the 3-way dance from RAW last week. "That's not gonna
happen tonight-that's not gonna happen any night!" Yeah right, Vince!

RAW CREDITS--RAW IS WAR'S a thorn in your eye!

Gee, this arena looks familiar! Oh wait, I know why! We are L-I-V-E from
MEMPHIS, TN!! HOME OF THE KING!!! Look at all those Jerry Lawler signs!!!!!
By the way--Lawler for Mayor all the way!!! And, JR for PRESIDENT!! YES!!!!!

HHH and Chyna make their way out to the ring. HHH is armed as usual with his
water bottle. Might I just add how much I love this theme music! HHH says,
"Taker, get your dead ass out here!" And with that, here comes The Undertaker
(and Paul Bearer.) Just as HHH and UT are about to go at it, Vince, Shane,
and the rest of the Corporate Ministry run out and separate them. NOW we
start off RAW with our usual in ring interview. I was wondering where it
was....Vince says that he is not gonna let the CM break apart. The crowd
wants UT and HHH to beat the hell out of each other. Vince says he won't let
that happen, and the crowd starts up the ASSHOLE chant. Vince: "SHUT UP!"
That's my quote of the week, I promise. Vince says this year, there will not
be a KING of the RING, but instead a QUEEN of the RING and points to Chyna.
Vince also says THE ROCK will not be WWF champ. Vince recaps the Stone Cold
situation and previews the ladder match for this SUNDAY at KOTR-only on PPV!.
(Order now!)
Vince says after this Sunday, Austin will suffer the wrath of the McMahons
like never before! Asshole chant starts back up, and STONE COLD's music
starts up. Austin is out with a ladder. Stone Cold climps the ladder with a
mic and a beer. Austin accepts the match for KOTR and then adds a
stipulation. If any CM members interfere, he'll be awarded 100% control of
the WWF immediately. Vince says oh no, and that Austin can't make
stipulations. Vince says that HE will make a stipulation. The stipulation is
that it will be a NO HOLDS BARRED ladder match because VINCE and SHANE
McMAHON said so! WAIT! "HBK" Shawn Michael's music starts up and HBK comes
up through the little elevator the BROOD uses. Michaels says they need
someone with a level head to make this decision, but first he needs some
coffee. Then Vince's former associates, Gerald Brisco and Pat Patterson
bring HBK coffee! HBK sets up a match between Stone Cold and any CM member
with the winner getting to add their stipulation to the KOTR match. Vince
offers the UT to take the spot. HBK says no, UT is already booked. Then Shane
offers HHH in the match with SCSA. HBK once again says no, HHH is also
already booked. HBK then reveals that HHH will face UT for the WWF Title
TONIGHT! So then Vince says it will be the Big Bossman in the match with
Austin TONIGHT. HBK agrees and says that HE will be the special referee for
the match, so we are all set. Stone Cold says he will beat Bossman's ass
TONIGHT cause Stone Cold said so! HBK then sets up Patterson and Brisco vs
Vince and Shane in a tag match tonight ALSO! Then they HIT HBK's music and
HBK, Patterson, and Brisco dance in one of the funniest RAW moments
EVER-which had me choking on my Dr. Pepper-and Vince does some of his
hilarious facial expressions. Vince tells the CM to "Get em" and the CM runs
after the stooges-who run away in fear. Ken Shamrock then gets in the ring
and NAILS Viscera with a chair and dares the CM to come into the ring.

JR and The King run down tonight's action.

HBK stares at the PUPPIES while JJ tries to get his attention. JJ says he
won't go to the ring tonight but HBK says he WILL!

The WWF REWIND for this week is the belly to belly suplex by Shamrock on
Shane McMahon.

Vince and Shane prepare the CM for tonight's action. Midian asks if he can
borrow Shane's belt since he lost his (European title, of course!)

Ken Shamrock, aka "The World's Most Dangerous Man" is facing Test in our
opening MATCH of the week. Test's music is STILL cool. Right before the two
lock up, Dubba J, Jeff Jarrett and the PUPPIES (Debra) come out, followed by
the Associates (Patterson and Brisco) who are making JJ come down to the
ring. Patterson comes on the ring and says that this match will be a TRIPLE
TRET (triple THREAT) match for the IC title, as ordered by HBK. Match starts
out with Test throwing JJ in the ring to Shamrock. Test and Shammy then
double team JJ. Test goes for the pin but Shamrock breaks it up. Test does
the same when Shamrock goes for a pin. Crowd chants "We want Puppies!" Test
gives Jeff a clothesline when he goes for the Figure Four. Test with a slam
then is knocked off the top rope by Shamrock. Shammy goes for the ankle lock
but Test breaks it up. JJ back with a DDT. Test and JJ then brawl on the
floor, leaving Shamrock alone in the ring. Suddenly, the LETHAL WEAPON Steve
Blackman comes out and canes Shamrock with a kendo stick. I LOVE that sound.
I want to cane someone. Anyway, JJ gets back in and pins Shamrock to win the
match.
Winner: Jeff Jarrett (Pinfall)--Lawler whistles for the puppies as they walk
away.

THE ROCK is on his way out to the ring!

"Gettin' Chefy with it" starring THE ROCK is played. I dunno, I just don't
LIKE it. I mean I like Ravioli, so I'm not really a jabronie, but I just
don't the commercial.

Ken Shamrock tells medics to STAY AWAY FROM HIM. Blackman calmly leaves the
arena. Boy it's been a long time since we've seen him.

THE ROCK w/A HUGE POP comes down to the ring. Rock on the mic and says that
if the Undertaker wants to drag him to the learning tree, he will gladly go,
pause, take a branch off, pinch each leaf off, and stick it straight up his
candy ass! If you smeeelll, oh you know the rest. Edge's theme plays!
Haven't heard that in a while, also. Cameras pan the crowd for Edge but they
can't find him-Edge is already in the ring. Edge and Rock have a nice match,
with neither man really getting the advantage for any long moment of time.
Ending saw The Rock catch Edge in a ROCK BOTTOM when Edge
was coming off the top rope. One people's elbow later, The Rock gets the
pin. Victory is short lived, however, because THE UNDERTAKER is out and gives
The Rock a tombstone piledriver. Undertaker continues to look evil. He's
evil and demonic, says JR!
Winner: The Rock (Pinfall)

Vince and Shane talk over tonight's match with HHH.

South Park movie-June 30th. Be there! I will!

Stone Cold prepares for his match coming up later on.

In a "Gorilla Slam Match" Mark Henry meets Viscera. The winner is the first
man to slam the other. Henry knocked Viscera to the mat after a big
shoulderblock and then goes for a slam but messes it up. Viscera misses a BIG
elbowdrop. Mark Henry on the second rope, but is caught by Viscera and press
slammed off the top to get the victory. Viscera then goes up top for a splash
but D'Lo Brown runs out and he and Sexual Chocolate throw Viscera off the top
making a big CRASH sound. Midian then runs out and nails D'Lo and Henry with
the European title belt.
Winner: Viscera

Michael Cole interviews Beaver and Mrs. Cleavage. Beaver: "Mom, why do I
have to wrestle a guy like Meat?" Beaver then says "I can't do this and wads
up his little beanie. Some female voice says "Chaz! We're live, Chaz! We're
live!" And The Beav walks off. That was cool!

JR says "Back to the drawing board, Beav" when we return, and the match
against Meat will not take place. Here comes Stone Cold! What? Another
commercial already? Grrrr.

Special Referee Shawn Michaels comes down for the big Stipulation match,
followed by the Big Bossman and finally Stone Cold Steve Austin. Crowd goes
wild, of course. As soon as the match begins, Vince and Shane come down the
ramp with a ladder. Austin goes out to chase them then he and Bossman brawl
on the outside. Vince sets the ladder up by the announce table and steps up a
few rungs. I smell a table spot. Rest assurred, Stone Cold then dumps the
ladder over and Vince hits the table and hits it HARD! The table does not
break. Ouch! Back in the ring, Stone Cold fights back but is caught by a
big elbow from Bossman. Bossman gains control for a while but Austin fights
back like, you guessed it, a Rattlesnake. Vince on the headset and says
Austin will pay. Austin nails a Lou Thesz press then an elbow for a two
count. Austin goes for the stunner but gets a boot to the face. Bossman is
actually working a nice match. HBK argues with the ref as Bossman goes for
the nightstick. Out of nowhere, a Stunner by Austin and HBK counts to three!
Austin and HBK drink beer as we go to break.
Winner: Stone Cold Steve Austin (Pinfall)-Stipulation for Sunday is that if
any CM members interfere, he is awarded 100% control of the WWF.

Vince/Shane/Austin promo for Sunday at King of the Ring--ORDER NOW!

If I see this damn Monster Ballads commercial one time, SOMEONE'S GONNA DIE!!

The Entire Corporate Ministry attack the Bossman for losing his match.

Val Venis is up next. His opponent, Prince Albert, with DROZ, comes down. Val
hits a plancha on both before the match and handcuffs Droz to the
turnbuckles. Val then hits a MONEY SHOT on Prince Albert and handcuffs him to
the ring. Val then pulls down Prince Albert's tights down (agh!) and tatoo's
"VV" on Albert's Hiney. Albert, of course ifs furious, but he cannot escape
it. JR: "I bet that hurts." LOL!
Winner: No Contest ( I would assume!)

DX is NEXT!

Yet another theme we haven't heard on RAW in a while, the original DX theme!
X-Pac and Road Dogg, come and and do the crotch chops to the pyro thing
followed by Kane in a separate entrance with his own ultra cool pyro. The
oppostion, Mr. Ass and The Acolytes make their way down also, but with no
pyro. X-Pac asks Acolytes to put the tag belts on the line, and MR. ASS
accepts the match. This match was pretty much a wild brawl. X-Pac missed the
bronco buster early on and eventually fell prey to the "Fame Asser" on one of
the tag title belts and was pinned by Mr. Ass-my prediction for King of the
Ring. Kane looks on in bewilderment. Mr. Ass leaves with a tag title belt as
the Acolytes look on in confusion.
Winner: Mr. Ass and the Acolytes

The Big Show is NEXT!

I have decided who I want to cane! The anti-smoking kid! "Are we finished?"
NO! WHACK! Yes, that's it!

G-TV this week features Al Snow (with Head looking on) reading a newspaper.
Al picks his nose, then later eats the booger. Snow denies it when Head
"confronts him about it." GaG!

The Big Show is out, as is Hardcore Holly. Holly says he is "The Big SHOT!"
Holly challenges TBS to a hardcore match, which he accepts. Holly and TBS
brawl to the back, and then to the outside. The Big Show pushes a CAR off a
ledge "onto Holly" then pins Holly outside the Pyramid arena. As The Big Show
is walking back towards the arena, Prince Albert walks out and quickly turns
around. Whoops!
Winner: The Big Show

No Chance in Hell plays, and here come Vince and Shane. JR says that Vince
looks like the Brawny paper towel guy. LOL! "Real American" plays next
leading to Patterson and Brisco coming down. JR says that music made him sick
10 years ago! Right on! Patterson and Briso just lay into Vince and Shane
for a while until Vince hits a lowblow. Ken Shamrock runs in and Vince runs
away. Shamrock hits an AWESOME belly to belly on Shane and gives chase to
Vince. Rodney and Pete Gas come out as the Stooges are beating up Shane. The
Stooges take care of the Mean Street Posse until a new man, complete with his
own sweater vest, runs out and helps the MSP. I guess the MSP has three
members now. Wahoo. The MSP and Shane go after the Stooges ankles with chairs.
Winner: Vince and Shane by DQ most likely, because of Shamrock's interference.

UT vs HHH is next! But first, a commercial break!

Vince/Shane/Austin promo for SUNDAY!

For the WWF title, Triple H meets the Undertaker in the next match. UT
attacks HHH before the bell with some punches, and then a choke in the
corner. They go back and forth for a while, until UT hits his move where he
walks the ropes. HHH nails a chopblock on UT and then works on the leg of UT
some more. Chyna gets involved, working on UT's leg then she dares Paul
Bearer to do something about it. HHH back on the leg of UT on the outside,
and Paul Bearer sends HHH into the protective barrier around ringside. HHH
and UT brawl on the ramp some more. Back in the ring, UT dominates some more
and sends HHH up and over the ropes after whip into the corner. HHH gets
back in control after going after the knee. Figure four leglock by HHH! UT
gets the advantage, but Chyna is in with a chair. UT blocks it as Chyna runs.
HHH kicks UT in the face, then THE ROCK comes out and his the ROCK BOTTOM on
Undertaker. Rock symbols for something, and a giant Brahma Bull symbol,
complete with snorting pyro and smoke coming out of the nose, comes down from
the rafters. Rock with the people's elbow on UT. The Brahma Bull symbol is
in the ring, but so is the Corporate Ministry. Rock fights them off for a
while, and the the BIG BOSSMAN comes out and helps ROCK! Undertaker is able
to escape, but Paul Bearer is not as Bearer is strapped to the Brahma Bull
Symbol. Rock on the mic says that at KOTR it will be the night of the Brahma
Bull! IF YOU SSMEELLLLLLLLLLL.....What the Rock...<People's Eyebrow>... is
Cookin!"

Overall a great RAW. I will be back next week with more. Email me any
comments or questions! Thanks for reading! You can check out my RAW Reports