______________________________

C awoke, with Edge sitting next to her bed, chewing obliviously on a lamp cord. While normally the appereance of a tall, blond man would pose no problems [especially in the bedroom], this WAS Edge, and he wasn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed.

"Edge," began C, defeatedly, "Why are you in my bedroom at..", C glanced at the clock, and her eyes nearly bugged out, "FIVE AM! HELLS BELLS GET OUT! I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!"

"But... but.... C", Edge whined pitifully, "There's no one for me to play with!"

C merely turned over, pulled the covers over her head, and muttered, "Go find Chibi, if you know what's good for ya."

Edge burst into tears, "But she left, and went to Niagra Falls. I don't know Niagra, or why he keeps falling, but I miss Chibi!"

"Edge, how long has she been gone."

Edge sniffled pitifully and blew his nose on C's blanket, "Ten minutes."

___________________

There was a scream, and a large thump down the hall. Kat opened her eyes and looked at the clock. It was 5:10 AM. Without second thought the stormed to the door, opened it, and yelled as loud as possible, "LOOK! I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU GUYS ARE DOING, KEEP IT DOWN!"

Edge's head snapped around, "KAT! Guesswhat? Didja know that Chibi went on vacation? And C said that you shouldn't bother people who are asleep. Well... she said a lot of other things too, but Chibi said those were bad words, and that I shouldn't say them. But since you're awake, I can be your friend!" Edge bounced happily, as he completed a sprint up the hall.

Kat, trying to figure out what the hell he was saying, finally caught on. "Chibi went on... vacation? Dear gods no."

Edge nodded solemnly, "She said that she would take me, but they didn't allow pets in the hotel."

"Well, that's all fine and dandy Edge," began Kat, trying to shove Edge back out of her room so she could try to get some sleep, "But I'm going back to sleep now. Its 5 in the morning, and I've had 2 hours sleep."

"But... but Kat. I thought you were going to keep me company!" Edge sat down in the hall and starting wailing pitifully. When he opened his eyes again, the door was closed and the lights were off.

Just then, "HEY EDGE! KEEP IT DOWN, WOULDYA?!", screamed Linzi.

___________________

10 AM, Kitchen

Kat glanced at C. C glanced at Edge, shuddered, and returned to her coffee.

"Come on guys! You can trust me! This will be soooo much fun! I'm good at this! I swear!", Edge smiled cutely at the girls.

Kat glared at him, "In a word, No. In two words, No Way. In three words, Hell's Bells No."

"But Kat! I'm good at this! I sent off to one of those mail-in colleges and got my PhD!"

C smirked, "They don't have very high admission standards, do they?"

Edge crossed his arms indignantly, "I'll have you know that I've got two PhD's now." and then sniffled pitifully. "Please guys? Just give me a chance, it won't hurt anything!"

Kat shook her head, "No way man. I don't care if you DO have a PhD in... 'manicurology', you aren't getting anywhere NEAR my nails. ESPECIALLY since I can see my power sander in your tool kit. Power sanders aren't for nails, Edge."

Edge hung his head dejectedly, then glanced at C, "Say.... I've got a PhD in dog grooming too... can I brush your hair?"

Kat grabbed C as she became airborn in an attempt to strangle Edge, "Deep breaths C, deep breaths. Edge is our friend. If we kill him, while the immediate results will be good, Chibi won't be a happy camper when she gets back. Come on C, its only a few days. We can do this, we're FEB, we're tough!"

C breathed deeply, "Yeah.... after all, its just Edge, how much harm could he do?"

Down the hall, Edge could be heard: "Hey Lucas! You look like you could use a manicure...."

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12 PM

Kat felt alone. Chibi was on vacation. C was at the hospital with Lucas. Linzi had barricaded herself in the men's bathroom. With Kidman. The various other FEBers had found excuses to get away from the arena, and therefore the rampantly friendly Edge.

Just then, she heard a door crack in the hall. Peering around the corner, she saw Witka sneaking towards the kitchen. Apparently Witka foolishly believed that she needed food because she was hungry. Edge caught her on route to the kitchen.

"Hi Witka! How are you!?"

Witka stared at the floor, trying not to make eye contact, "I'm fine Edge, just fine."

"Witka, why are you staring at the floor? Do you want to play Monopoly? I'm good at Monopoly, but you have to count the money, because I'm not that good at Math. Chibi says I shouldn't eat the hotels, because there aren't that many to begin with. And plastic edges are sharp. Hey! I said edge, hehehe, that's my name! Isn't that freaky weird?"

"Yeah Edge, that's great." Witka hastily jerked open the refrigerator and loaded her arms with food, oblivious to what the food actually was.

"Witka, why are you in such a big hurry? I thought you were my friend!" Edge pouted.

"Well.... Edge... see... the thing is. I'm a scientist, and I'm working on a very important experiment, and I really really have to be in the room with it, because it might explode."

"Really?" Edge's eyes lit up, "Can I see it?! I love science, I watch Bill Nye the Science Guy all the time, and he says the science is cool!"

"No Edge, you'll messitupbye!", screamed Witka, running into her room and slamming the door.

__________________

2 PM

"Kat, why is everyone hiding from me?" Edge asked the bathroom door sorrowfully.

"I don't know Edge." came the muffled reply.

"Well. Why are you in the bathroom and not coming out?" Edge sat down, and leaned on the locked bathroom door.

"Well... I.... umm... have... explosive diarrhea. Yeah, that's it."

Edge giggled, "Kat you're silly."

"Hey Edge... where are Christian and Gangrel?", Kat asked, fearing greatly for the Brood. They were, after all, only the Brood, and could be easily fooled into doing stupid things.

"Well, when they heard Chibi was going on vacation, they went to the grocery store and bought 4 days worth of supplies. When I asked them what they were doing, Gangrel said he was taking Christian camping. They disappeared into our room, and I haven't seen them all day. Kat," Edge began to sob, "I don't think Gangrel loves me. He's never taken me camping. Christian was always the better brother, he always did things better, I was just bigger and slapped him around a lot. Its not fair! ITS NOT FAIR!"

Meanwhile

Gangrel burped. "Mmrm. I'm glad we bought that portable grill. Those ribs sure were good, but I couldn't eat another bite."

Christian frowned, "I dunno, I feel kinda bad leaving all those girls out there with Edge. I mean, its EDGE."

Gangrel shook his head at Christian, "They're okay. They've all either left or holed up. Except Kat, who couldn't get to her room. I heard her in the bathroom begging Edge to leave her alone."

Christian snorted, "Sure, sure. Like Edge will ever leave her alone. Heh, he's bothering anyone that walks out. I heard Witka scream in the hall."

Just then, Christian rattled around in the debris of food stuffs.

"Gangrel.... we have a problem."

Gangrel looked up from a Snapple he was trying to bite open and glanced questioningly at Christian, "Hrm.... what?" Gangrel finally bit into the can and started sucking the can like the true Snapple vampire that he was.

"We've eaten all the food."

*PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT*, Vampire Boy did a spit take. "We've WHAT?! But we bought enough food for 5 days! We've been in here 4 hours! Oy vey! How did this happen?!"

Christian sobbed, "I don't know!"

______________

3 PM

"5 bottles of beer on the wall, 5 bottles of beer, you take one down, pass it around...."

Kat's defeated reply was muffled by the bathroom door, "Four."

Edge giggled, "Right! Four bottles of beer on the wall! Four bottles of beer on the wall, four bottles of beer! You take one down, pass it around...", Edge frowned, trying to remember.

"Three."

"Three! Bottles of beer on the wall. Boy Kat, you're good at this game. I wasn't so good at it, but Chibi made me learn, because she said counting was important, in case I ever got picked up by the cops."

There was a muffled sound of broken glass.

"Kat? What're you doing in there?"

*thump* "Nothing!" The reply was farther away than before.

Meanwhile, outside the broken bathroom window...

Kat gleed, "I'm free, I'm free!" Then instinct took over, and she flung herself on the ground, camoflaging, and crawling towards another building. Suddenly there was a shadow over her....

"Oh boy! We can play soldier! Say Kat, you aren't being a very good soldier, wearing a yellow shirt and trying to hide in the grass. Come on, you should be a better soldier than that."

Kat screamed, and ran into the complex, pounding on the door to the Brood's room, "Lemme in, lemme in, lemme in, lemme in!", before slamming the door open, running inside, and then padlocking it shut.

"Hi Kat.", Gangrel smiled nervously.

_____________________

A short interlude...

Needless to say, the next two days went similarly, with FEB members distracting Edge so their sisters could run to the kitchen, grab food, and return it to their rooms. Edge was greatly feared.

____________________

Monday Morning...

Chibi walked into the complex and nearly collapsed under the weight of her own luggage. "HEY EDGE! FATASS! C'mere and carry this luggage."

Edge scampered merrily up the hall, "CHIBI!" and bearhugged Chibi.

Chibi's ribs bent, "Edge.... you idiot, let go."

Just then a loud fanfare was heard, "CHIBI! YOU CAME BACK!". Kat ran down the hall and bearhugged Chibi, "You can never ever leave again. Ever."

"Edge was that bad, huh?"