Volume III, Issue 1 Rockpile Sportscenter April 4, 2000   

 It's Spring Time Again!

The CHGL is ready to fire up once again, opening play on April 11^th. This season includes the addition of three new teams and a couple of reconstructed old ones. New teams to the league include; Don West and Glen Holt; Erik Frank and Tom Kegley; and Mitch Hodge and Pat Shawver.

Holt and West make the transition from the SCATS league, bringing with them years of match play and "Outing" experiences. Frank and Kegley are both unknown to the Rockpile Sportscenter staff. Hodge and Shawver have a little experience in the CHGL with Shawver playing one previous season.

Good Luck to all the new guys and welcome to the "Tour".

Last season Chigger tried out another new partner. This one didn't work out either. With no one pointing fingers, the team of Steele and Chigger decided to go their separate ways. Both members quickly found replacements. Steele signed Terry "Tata" Bowles and Chigger discovered Kenny Kanode. Which one of these members came out the better. Chigger drafted an unheard of rookie, and Steele signed a player with only one year of experience under his belt. With Steele only in his second season his self, can this team find enough leadership to take on the veteran laden CHGL? Look for the team of Chigger and Kanode to get the best out of this deal earley!

Many un-founded rumors were flying around during the off season. The most disturbing of which concerned the sale of "The Rock" to the Quary. The Rockpile Sportscenter contacted Cedar Hills Head Pro, Stan Ore, and he confirmed that the course would remain intact. Mr. Ore also commented on the steps being taken to ensure that the CHGL would remain at Cedar Hills, such as the vast pond constructed on hole number eight.

The Rockpile Sportscenter has conducted an un-scientific survey to determine how you, the reader, thought the season would unfold. Several people were polled at random. The only rule in selecting the voters was that each voter must have at least one year experience in the CHGL. Each team received twenty points for a first place vote, nineteen points for a second place vote, and so on. This poll in no way reflects the view or opinions or the Rockpile Sportscenter or its staff.

 New Handicap System to be Implemented.

Under the guidance of the USGA handicap system, the CHGL will now use a 96% method to determine handicaps. Several members, representing various handicaps, were asked their views on this new proposal and it was overwhelmingly accepted. Members asked stated that the change would serve as motivation for better play. Nothing else will change. Double bogie is still the largest score that will count toward handicap. Commissioner Rakes said "Most people will not see an immediate effect on their handicap. The goal of the new system is to, on the average, give a better representation of a players skills. It's about the same as throwing out the best and worst rounds and averaging the rest, only simpler to calculate and more congruent with what the USGA recommends". The new system will be on a one year trial period. Handicaps used to establish flights for tournaments will still be 100%, same as in the past.

 Benny's Bunker Comments by Benny Fain.

Spring is in the air, flowers are blooming, birds are returning to their summer homes and soon the bees and gnats will move back in to the Rock. With the onset of the new melinium, the catch phrase is "change". It is inevitable. Everything has to change. One person who is very familiar with change is "Chigger" Woods, having a new partner every single year.

Change is how nature works. The Old useless trees and plants die off and rot, providing fertilizer for new strong trees. It is scary how this mirrors the CHGL. It is time for the young golfers to feed off of the old useless golfers. This has to happen for the CHGL to continue to grow. The old have served their purpose but they have outlived their usefulness.

In the spirit of change, I am changing my persona. It is no more Mister Nice Guy. I have been nice to weaker golfers in the past, but no more. It is Benny "the King of Pain" Fain and his trusty sidekick Danny D. Cocke versus the rest of you so called golfers.

Until next time,…Give your soul to the maker, cause your ass belongs to me.

 Chigger's Corner Comments by Charles Earley

Gentlemen ! It’s the latest & it’s the greatest . It’s fit to form . It’s hot off the press & it doesn’t get warm . It’s Chiggers corner & don’t be alarmed . I’ll be looking in the fairways & searching about the tee’s for a story to put in the Rockpile that is a guaranteed to please . It will be full of excitement & even a laugh ; so I hope Bennie doesn’t get mad if I crack on his a_ _ . In all seriousness the time is approaching . Some members have been sneaking around the greens & polishing up their clubs . As always we look forward to another wonderful season as the Greater Cedar Hills Golf League gets underway . Rockpile golfers would like to welcome the newest members to the league . You will find out why this is the greatest league at Ericsson Inc. . . We would also like to apologize for the many who aren’t able to get in this prestigious league.

Until next time; Da! Ha!

Chigger

Commissioner's Perspective by Andy Rakes

As you all know there was an embarrassing development at the Outing last season. At first I was very upset, but I decided to use that as the inspiration for this article, as well as this season.

During the course of a normal year in the CHGL (if there is such a thing), there are always several stories about players taking just a little more than the rules allow. This is not only poor etiquette, but it puts an unnecessary burden on your opponents. Some people feel uncomfortable confronting someone else concerning a rules violation. This inturn makes the round difficult for both parties to enjoy. The next time you think you have something to gain by moving your ball from behind a tree, grounding you club in the sand trap, or forgetting about the chip you dubbed, remember, you are only cheating yourself.

Former UCLA basketball coach John Wooden once said,"Dicipline yourself and others won't have too".

Make the right call.

Fairways and Greens,