Welcome to another edition of Pain Tolerance. It’s been two weeks since I last wrote, I’ve been suffering from a devastating disease for columnists. Writer’s block. Okay, it may not be as lethal but you get my point. My main problem was choosing a side for the newly "crowned" duo of WCW. Bischoff and Russo. Am I for them, and believe they can pull WCW out of this rut, or am I against them believe they’ll do no good. Well I’ve finally came to this conclusion. I’m inconclusive. Actually I believe these two will have their great points, but along with the great points definitely come their bad habits. More to come, later in the column.

I’m sure by now you’ve seen the interview that Bill Goldberg of WCW had with Al Isaacs of Scoopswrestling.com. I’ve read the article/interview and am actually appalled at what Goldberg had to say. 

In his opening sentences, Goldberg stated that he believed that the rumor of him sitting at home, collecting the cash and holding out on WCW until they boosted the ratings, was the biggest crock of shit he’s ever seen. He then goes on to say that he believes it is Triple H of the WWF who spread the rumor. He then proceeds to challenge Triple H to a fight in his backyard, he’ll supply the directions and transportation to his house. He continues, and I quote "I am very adamant about being out there for the fans because that's the only reason I'm out there doing what I do." 

Well isn’t that the biggest crock of shit I’ve ever heard. The way he reacted to this rumor and put blame on Triple H was not only very unprofessional, but purely stupid. Number one, if Triple H actually did hear about this interview, do you honestly think he would stupidly accept a fight. They’d be arrested, and obviously charged if any damage was done. Secondly, he STRESSES the point that he’s only in the business for the fans. Sure, those extra millions in his bank account don’t keep him from coming back. Also, I recall him on the Tonight Show a few months back and when asked how he got into wrestling he stated that his accountant called him one day and told him to get off his ass and to get a job. So obviously his intentions are far different then he stated in his interview with Scoops. 

"So throw the money aside, throw the fame…I don't care about that. The difference I can make for kids is the best. And to say that I'm sandbagging because I want the company to turn itself around until I come back, that's a crock. Like I said, I'm going to be instrumental in it." 

In this paragraph he basically states the opposite of what I said. Well, why doesn’t WCW try that then. Have Goldberg wrestle in the federation for no profit or funds at all. I’m sure he’d be squawking and whining immediately. 

"And I think that I'm probably one of the smartest people on the planet. Because not only do I realize that I have to slow down a little bit in the ring, but that if I go back too early with this, I could lose my arm. And there ain't nothing in the world worth that."

I’m not going to both criticize this quote. All I have to say is, somebody’s been hanging around with Hulk Hogan too much, and a certain ego has rubbed off on Bill G. That’s to obvious. How bout B. Goldberg.

He then goes on to criticize Mick Foley. He states that Mick Foley is a ridiculous human being. As well as being ignorant, but oh well that is all forgiven. HE RESPECTS MICK FOLEY. 

"He always aspired to be a professional wrestler, so he'll go to any length to entertain. And I don't disrespect that. I just disre…I don't applaud his path. Because he's going to kill himself in the process."  

So he doesn’t disrespect Mick’s aspirations, but he does disre... err he doesn’t applaud his path. All right there. His last sentence of Mick Foley killing himself due to some of his risqué actions in the ring. That’s sort of irrelevant now that Mick Foley has wrestled his last match. 

Wrestlemania 2000 was last night, rather then give an entire run, which has probably been beat to down by other columnists, I’ll just make note of some of the things that were eye opening or interesting. I went to a bar to watch Wrestlemania, and I must say it’s quite interesting to see the reactions of the crowd in the bar during wrestling spots or jokes. The costume of the Godfather got a good laugh from a few people. cowboy boots, with baggy "genie" pants and a flashy vest. If that’s not a cross dresser, then I don’t know what is. The Hard Core battle royal was a decent match. When I saw Tazz win the Hard Core championship, not even a minute in, I thought that was the end of the match. Then I realized that he had to continue no matter what, for 15 minutes. No one was pleased with Hard Core Holly coming out with the title. Everyone was rooting for Tazz. During the match when Funaki held the title and then took off running I was actually hoping he’d pull it off. That would have been hilarious. What can you say about the Triple Threat Ladder match. It was all I expected and more. I would have preferred a better ending, but an all around extraordinary effort by all. I’m surprised we haven’t heard any injury reports of Jeff Hardy. He executed a senton bomb off what looked to be a twelve foot ladder. The match continued for another two minutes, and he didn’t even move. The camera was put on him after Edge and Christian grabbed the title belts, and he was still lying in the aisle way, he looked to be unconscious, which certainly would be believable.

The cat fight was pretty much a time filler. Nothing really out of the ordinary. No nudity, like speculated on the Internet. I suppose the "N" rating is for something else, other than nudity. Some of the mannerisms of Val Venis after kissing Terri and then seeing the Kat, who he thought was "better". Then after getting a taste of Kat and the she-devil Terri. He ended up being FORCED into a kiss with Mae Young. Damn, I’d be drinking oil after that, anything to get that taste out of my mouth. This is one reason I truly like the WWF over any of the other federations. ECW provides solid wrestling, with excessive profanity. Do they think using the word f*ck every 5 minutes on a pay-per-view, credits their product? WCW provides quality wrestling sometimes, and the occasional good interview. But the WWF, provides, a solid wrestling match Chris Benoit Vs. Chris Jericho Vs. Kurt Angle. They provide hilarious comedies the Cat Fight, with the mannerisms of Venis. Non-stop action The Triple Threat Ladder match, and finally even dramatic matches, last night’s main event. I will not deny the WWF does screw up a lot with dumb interviews or stupid gimmicks, or even ridiculous feuds or interviews. But most of the time they are able to provide entertainment along with the wrestling. 

The tag team match between Kane and Rikishi Vs. Road Dogg and Xpac was a decent match up. More action took place on the outside. I was quite surprised at how persistent and determined Kane, Rikishi and Paul Bearer were to get their hands on Tori. Also, it’s become a tradition for Kane to pummel Pete Rose at Wrestlemania. It started two years ago in Boston, where Rose was the ring announcer for Kane’s match up. He made fun of Boston and out came Kane who tomb stoned him. I wonder if Vince believed that, that simple maneuver would go over so well with the crowd, and nearly be demanded the following year. I’m not exactly sure but I don’t remember them showing who was under the chicken costume this year. I was surprised this match up took place so late in the card, I think they should of had the Triple Threat Ladder match later in the card, but I suppose they wanted to space out the show stealers. The Ladder match, the three way for the European and Intercontinental championships and the Fatal Four way for the WWF Heavyweight title. 

The main event last night was awesome. The Big Show went out first as expected, followed by Mick Foley. That truly was a shocker. What was quite interesting and even ironic about the crowd on hand at Wrestlemania was they booed Triple H and Foley teaming up on the Rock, then only a few minutes later, Foley is pinned and the fans boo. Make up your damn minds! You even look at the Rock the wrong way and you get instant heel heat, but then a legend like Foley is pinned in his final match (IT BETTER BE!), and he’s cheered. Well, the fans in Anaheim, have me clue less. The ending was nicely done and totally unexpected. The gleam in Vince’s eye after he hit the Rock with the chair was priceless. I wonder if the WWF puts their performers through a class on facial expressions? The McMahons taking consecutive Rock Bottoms was great. If you saw it, you have to admit Stephanie took the Rock Bottom the best. She sprang up so high from the mat that she nearly flew out of the Rock’s reach while in midair. The ending really makes me want to tune into RAW tonight. I wonder how Linda McMahon will react to her families actions last night. After all, she DID ask Vince to make things right with his daughter and son. I guess he has heard the old phrase, if you can’t beat ‘em, you might as well join ‘em. Another question that has yet to be answered is how will the WWF write the Rock out of the story lines. They can’t just have him say "Well I’m off to tape Mummy 2. Have a good one." They obviously need to injure him on camera and write him out that way. Another problem involved in this is, who will step up into the main event. Right now the only main events that are active after Wrestlemania are Triple H and the Big Show. Kane could easily be pushed up a notch, as could Rikishi. The WWF has a few of their top stars out at the moment. Stone Cold Steve Austin, The Undertaker and soon The Rock. A lot of people are upset that Triple H retained the title last night. Yes, he has held the title for a long time, but I look at it as though the WWF is adding credibility to the title. After all it’s been the only title lately that hasn’t changed hands on a monthly, or even weekly basis. 

Almost done this week’s column. I have but one thing to do, post a couple of your responses from my on going question/poll. What is your definition of a wrestling mark. Here’s some new responses:

[email protected]
A Mark is someone who takes wrestling to the extreme. Someone who believes every story line for example any person who thought HHH and Steph really got married is a mark, or in that case and idiot. Also A mark is someone who repeats what they see on wrestling, for example, if you insult someone and they give you the "DX Crotch Chop" in return well that person is a Wrestling Mark. People who are wrestling Marks pop at home for wrestlers like, Hogan, Goldberg, or someone who u ask who's your favorite wrestler, and they reply, Goldberg and Stone Cold. I personally don't care for marks. As a matter of fact I can't stand 'em.
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Before I post any more responses, I just can’t resist. Why are people too proud or even more likely "blind" of their own actions. If you’ve watched a wrestling show your a mark! Obviously, if you didn’t enjoy what you viewed on a wrestling show, you wouldn’t watch it anymore!

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[email protected]
Being a mark is not a bad thing; it simply means that you are able to suspend disbelief while watching a televised or live wrestling broadcast or pay-per-view. If you've ever leaned on the edge of your seat as Austin hit his Stunner, if you've ever popped when the Rock began to layeth the smaketh down, hell, if you just don't like HHH, then you're a marik. Join the millions. I love being a mark. Sure, I look at the matches, and I see spots, and botched storylines, but what I really see (at least from WWF and ECW) is a product that makes me WANT to suspend my disbelief and believe that Raven is evil, or that Vince McMahon really is a greedy corprate son-of-a-bitch who delights in "screwing" his talent via run-ins and unjust firings. Wait a second.........
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This next one was hilarious. He first rips on me for calling wrestling fans marks. Following this, in his email he then proceeds to tell me that he likes me column and reads it all the time.

[email protected]
When a wrestling fan refers to one as a"mark" it is often used as a way to make themselves seem "higher" or more educated than those who they are classifying. To all of those people who throw the term around I say, "Shut UP!!!" Who cares if a fan buys into the storyline or become excited when their favorite wrestler wins. That's why we're all watching in the first place, for entertainment. Furthermore, can't all of you "mark-callers" find something more important to do than spending your time as an "educated and sophisticated" wrestling fan? Think about it. Its WRESTLING. Sure we all love it, but sometimes you are the ones who need to look at reality.
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Well that’s all for the MARK Question. Thank you all for sending me your responses and I’m sorry that I couldn’t post everyone’s. 

I’ve decided to bring back the Failed Gimmick of the Week. Haven’t done this bit in a while. I’m going to change the name of it to the "Failure of the Week". So without further ado, here is this week’s Failure of the Week... We wrestling fans. Not all of us are bad, and just like to watch wrestling and enjoy the odd female. However last night on Sunday Night Heat I met the dumbest youth in the word. The WWF was interacting with the fans outside of the Arrowhead Pond, in Anaheim last night. In one of the segments they asked the fans who would win the Fatal Fourway elimination match for the WWF Heavyweight title. Well after a bunch of rejects who mimicked, Big Show, Rock, Triple H and even Mick Foley. There was a kid about fourteen to fifteen years old shown. He stated that the Rock would win, and that the Rock was such a great role model for the kids of the World. Well, after listening to this I believe my IQ level dropped dangerously low. WHAT IN HELL DOES THIS KID MEAN?! The Rock a good role model? If you consider a character on television that speaks freely about the genitalia of the female body and nick names it "Poontang Pie", talks about shoving over sized objects up your rectums, and talking about kicking anybody’s ass. If you consider that a role model, then any morals or beliefs that we as human beings posses, then you could say they’re shot to hell.

Thanks for reading this SUPPPPPER long edition of Pain Tolerance. Enjoy RAW tonight, I doubt any of you will be watching a "Best of" show over a live show.