(The scene opens to what looks to be an aerial shot of a somewhat urban landscape. CUE-UP: "Wasted Years" by Iron Maiden. A camera is inside a helicopter scanning a view of the surroundings below it, showing the Maryland suburbs of Washington, D.C. The camera turns slowly and shows Joe Lebron, Scott Malec, and Lord Dread all seated in the helicopter behind the pilot, engaged in unheard conversation. All three men look to be excited but very businesslike as the helicopter crosses the Potomac River entering District of Columbia airspace. The helicopter is given clearance by the FAA as it crosses near the Nation's famous monuments. The Washington Monument, the Lincoln Memorial, and the Pentagon can all be seen looming in the evening dusk as the headlights and tailights of cars are seen snaking along below along Avenues such as New York, Pennsylvania, and Massachusetts. The helicopter slowly descends as it nears the MCI Center in Washington's business district. Buildings loom closer as the helicopter begins to hover and lower itself onto the recently built arena. It is an unusually warm fall night in D.C. as the three FWF officials disembark the helicopter and climb down to the helipad. The helicopter is making quite a racket as the General Manager of the NHL's Washington Capitals, George McPhee, approaches them. Scott Malec shoots him a dirty look and brushes right past him, bumping him as he goes by. Joe Lebron can only shrug his shoulders and walk away from McPhee. Malec, an avid Chicago Blackhawks fan, is still angry at him for attacking Hawks' coach Lorne Molloken after a game recently in the locker room. The three men enter the buidling through the roof as the camera switches to the inside of the MCI Center. As soon as the camera switches, instant hysteria ensues as the fans realize they are on TV. The building is sold out, one of the FWF's greatest triumphs since the MCI Center is quite large. A sea of signs can be seen as the camera pans around, including "IF SHADES IS SATAN, THEN NEVADA IS GOD", "I MARK FOR BLOOD", "SOMEBODY HIT HACKER", and "I DON'T WANT TO MISS THAT THANG". The camera slowly pans down to Tony Ross, Victor Alvarez, and Jake Shades seated at ringside. Ross and Alvarez are both wearing conservative suits, while Shades looks like a 70s pimp, with a dark green polyester suit with butterfly collar. Underneath he wears a T-shirt that has the Malec-O-Meter at about 1 minute to midnight, and a rayon tie clipped to his T-shirt collar)
TONY ROSS: "Hello FWF fans, and welcome to this edition of FWF Battleground here on Fox Sports America! We are live from the MCI Center in Downtown Washington, DC for an event of HUGE proportions! I am Tony Ross along with Victor Alvarez and the ever obnoxious Jake Shades!" (Tony glances over at Shades) "What in the world are you wearing??"
JAKE SHADES: "Well, I was told by Malec and Lebron to start dressing more like a professional and here is my professional ensemble! I'm a professional pimp!"
T.R.: "You just love taking Malec and Lebron's orders and rubbing them in their face don't you? It's a wonder you are still employed!"
J.S.: "I feel that I am sartorially dressed for this event here in the Nation's dungpit, I mean capital! Hey, did you hear Malec had dinner with Monica Lewinsky this week?"
T.R.: "Oh Lord, and how do you know this?"
J.S.: "Because Monica had spaghetti sauce all over her dress instead of Malec's love juice! The man is a notorius slob!! Ha ha ha!!"
T.R.: "Too bad Monica jokes went out about the same time your suit did! Victor, what a lineup we have tonight here in DC! And what a main event!"
VICTOR ALVAREZ: "I am in full agreement! The National Champion and Frontier Champion are teaming up tonight to take on "Ikon" Abel Wicks and Wayne Roberts in a gigantic collision to try and sway the balance of power here in the FWF! It is no secret that a group war is breaking out here in the FWF!
J.S.: "Yeah, but too bad that idiot Rabesque can only get that Pandorian wannabe biker dreg Nevada Smith to ally with him! Billy Matthews has enough sense to resist them!"
T.R.: "Rabesque made a call to arms recently and was met with mixed reactions! So far, Rabesque and Nevada are outnumbered by a group that includes Abel Wicks, Minion, Ashe Draven, Golem, and Wayne Roberts! 5 vicious men who will do anything to win!"
V.A.: "That is one group I don't want to be outnumbered against!"
T.R.: "Fans, if you saw the Pay-Per-View, you know what we are talking about! Wrestlebowl I ended in total carnage as Wicks, Golem, Draven, Minion and Roberts all ganged up on Nevada Smith, Billy Matthews, and Helix, trapped in a cage! (Highlights are shown of the battle going on within the locked cage) Not even Jean Rabesque and Michael Kerrigan could help as they were both laid out! (Kerrigan is shown taking a vicious shot in the back of the head from Draven's Singapore cane) Stone Wolf was there as well as special referee and he was lucky to escape serious damage!"
V.A.: "Jean Rabesque's knee is not at 100% and that was further aggravated at the last PPV! Rumors are flying about that Helix was injured so bad he may have to retire!"
J.S.: "There is a God!! And let's not forget the return of Ashe Draven!! What a highlight!"
T.R.: "Yes, Draven made a dramatic return to the FWF by siding with Wicks and company! But fans, tonight, not only do we have that main event, we have National Tag Team Champions the New Breed taking on Blood and Fire, Troy Martinez and Jared Justice! Also, for the Cable TV Title, Stone Wolf will defend against Minion! Both men are coming off huge wins at the PPV, with Stone Wolf defeating Jobber and Minion beating Michael Kerrigan, with the help of the returning Joe Massacre!"
(Massacre is shown delivering a mighty chair shot to the head of Kerrigan as Wicks distracts the referee)
V.A.: "Yes, but Massacre was clearly not there to help Minion, he just wanted a piece of Kerrigan, and we will hear from Michael Kerrigan tonight!"
J.S.: (making a pencil noise on paper) "Let me mark that down as my bathroom break!"
T.R.: "Also tonight, the FWF is creating an unsanctioned and unofficial title and prize, the Extreme Ring! Asylum, JT Holiday, Suicide King, and "Lights Out" Scott Allen will all vye for this title in a 4-Way Hardcore Match! We have seen what these guys are capable of and they define extreme!" (Highlights of Suicide King and Asylum's bloody Barbed Wire Match are shown)
V.A.: "Scott Allen has made some serious racial remarks and accusations against Suicide King, so we'll see how that pans out! JT Holiday may be the only sane wrestler in there!"
J.S.: "Don't worry about my man JT, he'll handle himself in there! I kinda like those other guys though, so I can't be too biased!"
T.R.: "That may be a first! We have all that plus much more here on Battleground! Fans, before we went on the air tonight, we had two matches, one of which pitted Jobber against "Mr. Charisma" Walter Macdougal! Here you see the highlights! Before the match started, Jobber's ex-manager JV returned! Here is what happened!
(Lights go out. Cue up "Millenium" by Robbie Williams. As the lights turn on we see none other than the Jobber's ex manager JV stands on a lighting rig. He holds a carton of milk in his right hand, and a TV remote in the other. He takes a drink of milk spilling it all over him as a recording of fans singing along to "Millenium" is played through the PA. JV walks down toward the ring where he stands on the apron takes another sloppy drink of milk, and steps through the ropes and smashes the remote over the head of McDougal. He hands the Jobber the milk, who takes a sip and then hands it to Mojo (the monkey) who takes a quick sip and then hugs JV. )
JV: "Jobber, me and you are headed back to the top."
(C'Moore Kill in the corner does not seem happy as he grabs the mic.)
C'Moore: "Top? I've been here for 3 weeks, and you've been back two minutes and you want me to lay down and go away? Well I'm not going away that easily. Quote the rabbi, see ya homies."
(Kill holds up both arms and then leaves the ring.)
T.R.: "Jobber and Macdougal basically kept it clean up until this point before tempers flared and both men tumbled out of the ring! It was actually an exciting match and I was disappointed that it came to this!"
V.A.: "Yes, Jobber and Macdougal started using all types of ringside furniture against each other and Danny Diaper was forced to disqualify both men!"
J.S.: "Yeah, because that pantywaist Diaper doesn't have the rocks to go out and try and get them back into the ring! He just stood there and counted with one hand with the other one up his ass!"
T.R.: "Jake, this was not a hardcore match or a No DQ! No weapons are allowed! After all this, Brian Matthews ran out and absolutely beheaded Jobber with a chair shot, and that may be what Ricky Kabe paid Matthews to do at the last Battleground! Kabe wants revenge for his sole loss in the FWF! Next, we saw one of the most unique matches in FWF history! FWF newcomer, Maxwell Houz, who debuted at the Wrestlebowl I pre-show right here on Fox Sports America, demolished White Lion, who was then fired by the FWF along with his Kliq! Tonight, he took on JD Badluck, Conflict, and Hacker in a Gauntlet Match!"
J.S.: "I personally enjoyed this!"
(Roll highlights)
T.R.: "Houz impressed everyone in attendance by even having the courage to take on 3 men in a row! First, Houz had some early trouble with Badluck, who used serveral high flying moves to frustrate Houz, but it was only a matter of time before the caffeine fiend got a hold of Badluck and and used his huge size advantage to pummel Badluck! Houz got the 1-2-3 after a Senton Bomb from the second turnbuckle!"
V.A.: "For 275lbs, the man can move!"
J.S.: "Of course it also helped that Badluck sucks!!"
T.R.: "Next up was Conflict! Conflict showed early promise by dominating the first 5 minutes of the match! This may have been due to the fact that a camera caught Conflict putting downers into Houz' mocha before he was finished with Badluck, but soon, Houz' valet, Rusti Spears, kept distracting him, and Conflict appeared to like what he saw in Spears! Houz axehandled him viciously from behind and this was the beginning of the end! A series of power moves by Houz led up to a brainbuster, and Conflict did not kick out in time! Houz had pinned two men in a row!"
V.A.: "As the match progressed, I realized that this guy was not just a shameless corporate shill for a coffee brand! I see plenty of talent in this big man!"
J.S.: "And with Ziggy Jefferson leading him, he has nowhere to go but to the National Title! And a few nervous breakdowns here and there!"
T.R.: "It appeared that Houz had shaken off the effect of the downers as he started off with Hacker, and Hacker provided one hell of a challenge to Houz! Hacker got several near 3 counts as Houz could not get his game going full blast! Miss Honey was present at ringside and problems began, as Scott Allen, who has been harassing Miss Honey lately, came out and grabbed her and carried her to the back! This distracted Hacker beyond belief! Houz took control as Honey ran back to ringside..."
J.S.: "With her funbags practically falling out of her gold dress!! I LOVED this part!!"
T.R.: "Allen was close behind and Honey ran past Rusti Spears and turned around and threw a nice savate kick, but instead of hitting Allen, she hit a glancing blow on Spears who was pulled in front by Allen!! Spears was not hit too hard and she went after Miss Honey!!"
J.S.: "And we saw something we have not seen enough of in the FWF!! CAAATFIIIIIGGGHHHT!!!" T.R.: "As Honey and Spears were scratching and clawing at each other on the floor, Allen just stood and watched with a look of great amusement! Hacker watched this in disbelief before going to the top turnbuckle to finish Houz after regaining control! But Houz was ready, and as Hacker came off the top rope, Houz hit him with the Maxwell Spear, which completely knocked the wind out of Hacker, and the 1-2-3 quickly followed! Ziggy Jefferson already joined Allen in watching Honey and Spears go at it, but Houz came out, pulled Spears off, threw her over his shoulder and left ringside!"
J.S.: "Spoiling an enjoyable moment I might add!"
T.R.: "By this time, Hacker caught his breath and dove over the top rope and hit Allen with a plancha, and those two brawled all the way to the back!"
J.S.: "As Honey tried to hold up whatever was left of her dress!! Simply awesome!! Ha ha ha!! I haven't seen that much cleavage since I de-pantsed Malec at a league meeting!"
T.R.: "LIAR!! Fans, we have to take a break, and we will return after this message on Fox Sports America!"
(Fade to Commercial)
(The camera pans around the MCI Center showing some unruly fans. Several more signs are shown, including "MISS THANG+KAREN JEWELLO+MISS HONEY=RATINGS", "KABE IS A FAKE", and "MAXWELL HOUZ IS GOOD TO THE LAST DROP". The camera quickly cuts to the outside of the MCI Center. Two black Lincoln Continentals pull up, both with government plates. Directly behind them follow one Washington D.C. Police Cruiser and a Virginia State Trooper. Out of the first two cars exit three men, all very well dressed in suits. One man is recognizable as Washington D.C. Assemblyman, Cornelious Weathers. As they head into the building, amid looks of confusion from security personnel, the D.C. patrolman and VA. State Trooper tail closely behind. The camera cuts back to Paul Kramer standing at mid-ring)
PAUL KRAMER: "In our opening match, coming to the ring," (CUE-UP: "Millenium" by Killing Joke) "From Wichita, Kansas, CONDOR AND FALCON, THE BIRDS OF PREY!!"
(The crowd cheers as the Birds come to the ring slapping hands along the way)
P.K.: "And their opponents," (CUE-UP: "Thunderstruck" by Sprung Monkey) "From Sacramento, California, at a combined weight of 617lbs., DANNY BLAST AND MONTANA JACKSON, HARDCORE!! They are accompanied by Sadie Jackson!"
(The crowd pops again as Hardcore walks slowly to the ring, Jackson is carrying a ladder and Blast has a table, both have the Hardcore "H" logo in green and white. Sadie draws some hoots and hollers in her tight red sleeveless body suit)
TONY ROSS: "Two pure tag teams are gonna go at it here and what was the deal with those troopers and that other guy? What was that all about!?"
JAKE SHADES: "Who cares!? Just look at Sadie!"
T.R.: "Do you think you can extricate your mind from the gutter for two seconds!?"
VICTOR ALVAREZ: "Tony, I believe that was Washington Assemblyman Cornelius Weathers! I wonder what in the world he is doing here!"
J.S.: "Hopefully he's gonna lay a subpoena on Malec and LeBron for having Stanley Rothenstein falsely arrested at the Pay-Per-View in New York!"
T.R.: "I sincerely doubt that Jake! Anyways, we got action in the ring as the two teams begin battle! The huge Montana Jackson goes after Condor with bludgeoning rights while Danny Blast dropkicks Falcon over the top rope! There you see the ladder and table propped up at ringside, and who knows when they will come into play! Blast and Condor go at it as Jackson returns to his corner! Blast whips Condor in and hits a huge backdrop!"
V.A.: "Something seems wrong here, Condor looks out of it, almost lethargic! Falcon hasn't even got up on the apron yet!"
J.S.: "No, Vicky, the Birds ALWAYS suck this bad! You're just now noticing!"
T.R.: "Blast whips Condor in again but Condor ducks a clothesline and comes off the ropes with a body press!! 1...2...Kickout! Condor goes to the corner and Falcon isn't even there! Condor turns and gets jacked in the jaw! Blast slams him down and mounts the turnbuckles and comes down with a forearm right onto Condor's head!"
V.A.: "Falcon is just now getting to the apron! That fall must have done some damage!"
T.R.: "He is favoring his knee and that very well may be the case! Blast pulls Condor up and whips him into Hardcore's corner! Jackson pummels him with elbows to the head as Blast tags in again!
J.S.: "That idiot Falcon just fell off the apron again!! Get up you big sissy and fight like a man!"
V.A.: "Something is seriously wrong with Falcon's knee here!"
T.R.: "Condor is getting brutally double teamed here as Jackson is in and he mounts the second turnbuckle for a splash!! Ohhh!!! 1....2...No!! Condor somehow kicks out! Condor is pulled up and he rakes Jackson's eyes and dives for his corner but nobody is home! Falcon is lying in agony on the floor!"
V.A.: "He may have banged his knee of the steel steps on the way down when Blast dropkicked him! That could do some serious damage!"
T.R.: "Condor is looking around for his partner and doesn't see Jackson charging him like a runaway bulldozer!! Ohhhh!!! He cremated Condor in the corner! Condor falls limply to the mat and Jackson calls to Sadie to open up the ladder and set up the table!! Jackson tags Blast in!! What in the world is going on here!!"
V.A.: "Sadie slides the ladder in the ring!! This could be devastating!"
J.S.: "Anything to get the Cockatiels out of the FWF!"
T.R.: "Jackson is setting up the ladder in the ring and he dumps Condor over the ropes! Sadie has the table set up and Jackson slams him on the concrete before laying him out on the table! Sadie holds Condor's legs as Blast is climbing the ladder in the ring!! My God, what is he doing!!??"
V.A.: "He's going to jump from the top of the ladder down to Condor on the table!!"
T.R.: "Ohhhh!!! Dear sweet Lord!!! Danny Blast just performed one of the most death-defying moves I've ever seen!! A somersault senton splash onto Condor on the table!! Incredible!! This crowd is rabidly applauding!!"
(The crowd also gets the ECW "Holy SH!t" chant going, but FSA censors it out)
V.A.: "This is academic as Blast somehow gets himself up from the wreckage and pulls Condor into the ring! Listen to this crowd in D.C.! Falcon is still down on the floor!"
T.R.: "Blast with the pin!! Forget it!! 1....2...3!! Hardcore dominates the Birds of Prey here!!"
J.S.: "Say goodbye to the worst tag team to ever soil the rings of the FWF! Goodbye and good riddance!!"
V.A.: "Shades is right! The Birds of Prey's career may have ended here tonight! Unbelievable!"
T.R.: "Blast shakes off the cobwebs but he seems to be OK, and Condor is not moving as Falcon rolls into the ring to check on his partner! Hardcore leaves the ring in jubilant celebration! I still can't believe that move, guys! What a risk-taker!"
V.A.: "We saw Hardcore demolish the Kliq at Wrestlebowl I's pre-show, and we know that Hardcore is for real! Watch out New Breed!"
J.S.: "If they didn't kiss the fans ass so much they might be that much more deadly! They need to take attitude lessons from Golem!"
T.R.: "That would be the downfall of Hardcore, Shades! Fans, this is just a taste of what we have in store for you, stay tuned!!"
(CUT-TO: A Backstage office. Joe Lebron, Lord Dread and Scott Malec are going over the direction of the show. A knock on the door is heard, and Lebron yells for them to come on in. Assemblyman Weathers, along with the other two men dressed in suits enter, while the law enforcement officers wait outside in the hallway.)
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "Good even gentlemen, my name is Assemblyman Cornelious Weathers and I currently serve right here in Washington D.C. Along with me here are two United States Marshals."
[Lebron extends his hand and shakes with Mr. Weathers as Malec glances suspiciously at the Marshals."
JOE LEBRON: "Nice to meet you Assemblyman, but we're running a television program right now, and really don't have anytime to discuss campaign contributions. (Lebron smirks and speaks in a sarcastic tone) Fact is, we don't ever recall inviting you here, and are just a little bit confused as to how you got into the building."
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "No worry, sir. (Weathers pulls a large manilla envelope from his jacket pocket) It seems one of your employees has managed to violate the conditions of his parole twice this week by failing to appear for previously scheduled hearings, which is especially confusing to myself considering he was working in the area."
JOE LEBRON: "Black Sage?"
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "(laughs) Yeah, that's the fellow. You *should* probably get used to this kind of thing employing a miscreant like him in the first the place."
JOE LEBRON:---Let's skip the pleasantries, gentlemen. What are your intentions here, exactly?"
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS:---Well this here in my hand (raises the envelope in front of Lebron) is a warrant for Mr. Sage's arrest signed by U.S. District Judge Harvey Peterson right here in Washington D.C. *And* these Marshals here, they're going to arrest your employee tonight, *so* where might we find Mr. Sage?"
JOE LEBRON: "(laughs) Yeah, well I don't know if this is some sort of political publicity stunt or what Mr. Weathers, but I'm running a business here, and don't appreciate the likes of you walking onto my program making threats. You had all god damn day to issue this warrant, and you chose to do it now, during a live broadcast!?"
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "I do apologize, but unlike the world of professional wrasslin', Washington D.C. is a very busy place and we get things done whenever they can get done, not when it's convenient for the likes of your television ratings."
JOE LEBRON: "Well, you'd better consider my ratings, because Sage is scheduled to wrestle here shortly...and unless you plan on shutting this show down in front of 20,000 Washington D.C. voters, and many more on television...then Sage *IS* going to appear as advertised."
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "Let's make a deal, Mr. Lebron. How does that sound?"
JOE LEBRON: "It sound like a pile of **** to me! I don't care about who you're trying to impress by attempting to bully me around, and even care to understand what you trying to accomplish here, but understand *this*...Sage *will* wrestle, and when he's done, then...*and* ONLY THEN...can you do whatever you want with him. Got that, Assemblyman!?"
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "Mr. Lebron, it's been a pleasure, but I do suggest you have a stand-by in the event we find Mr. Sage before he has the chance to step out into that arena. (Weathers turns to the Marshals and motions for the door) Let's go arrest Mr. Sage."
(The two Marshals exit the office as Lebron and Weathers stare at each other, with Malec still looking on.)
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "Good day to you, gentlemen. I regret meeting under such unfortunate terms.
(Mr. Weathers heads out the door, joining the marshals and police in the hallway.)
JOE LEBRON: "Don't you dare make me look bad! (Lebron turns to Malec) Scott, make sure they don't find Sage before he appears. They won't attempt to arrest him until after the match if we can keep them at bay long enough. Have a camera follow them, keeping us updated. *OH*, and arrange for a different..."
(Fade to Commercial)
(The camera comes back from commercial with an exterior shot of the MCI Center and people walking by. The shot fades into Paul Kramer standing at mid-ring. CUE-UP: "Bring the Pain" by Method Man)
PAUL KRAMER: Ladies and gentlemen, at this time, would you please give a warm FWF welcome to "PRIMETIME" Deion Danger!!"
(Danger makes his way to the ring wearing dark sunglasses and a light gray Armani suit. He enters the ring and Kramer hands him the mic. As he speaks, his gold filling on his tooth glistens in the lights causing a sparkle.)
DEION DANGER: Ladies and gentlemen, I am so very proud to be here. It seems that over the last few months, things have been a bit crazy here in the FWF. You have these cracked guys running around playing with the lights, people threatening to take over....groups forming and unforming, sickos, weirdos, perverts, you name it....it's been done. Anyways, the one thing that hasn't been done.....there are no heros. There is no one in this FWF thing that can truly stand up and be a role model for the youth of America.....until now. I am here to right the rights and to punish the wrongs. It's about time that someone came forward to restore some good ol' values in this business. I am just the man to do it right. Evil doers, your time has come and gone.....it's PRIMETIME now. Thank you and God bless you all!!!"
(Danger exits the ring to the cheers of the fans)
TONY ROSS: "What a suprise that was! I didn't know Danger was going to be here tonight!"
JAKE SHADES: "Yeah, if I would have known, I would have brought some Immodium AD! That guy gives me the runs!"
VICTOR ALVAREZ: "We saw Deion Danger come out during JT Holiday's match at the PPV, and Danger may already have his first target!"
(The camera switches back up to Paul Kramer)
P.K.: "In our next match, coming to the ring," (CUE-UP: "Somebody's Got To Feel This" by Kid Rock) "From Las Vegas, Nevada, weighing in at 245lbs., CODIE THOMPSON!!"
(Thompson gets a mixed reaction with mostly cheers as he walks to the ring, and he has a distant look on his face)
P.K.: "And his opponent," (CUE-UP: "Counterfeir" by Limp Biskit) "From Champaign, Illinois, weighing in at 265lbs., RICKY KABE!!"
(The crowd erupts in boos as Kabe struts to the ring, taunting as many fans as he can before he gets to the ring. He climbs in the ring and goes to the turnbuckles and taunts the fans some more, all the while pointing at himself)
T.R.: "What a match this should be! The youth of the FWF is represented well here by these two wrestlers!"
J.S.: "Yeah, too bad loser Thompson almost quit a few days ago, he got so frustrated because he knew that Ricky Kabe was going to whoop his ass! At least Thompson has the brains to know when he is beat!"
V.A.: "Well, he's here now and he looks to be ready to wrestle!"
T.R.: "Kabe starts to circle Thompson as Thompson awaits the first move! Kabe turns to the crowd and offers some more taunts and the D.C. crowd answers in force! We already saw Brian Matthews attack Jobber, and we pretty much know that Kabe here was behind that attack!"
J.S.: "Hey, Kabe is just trying to erase the one blemish on his record, that's all! Nothing wrong with that!"
T.R.: "Only in your demented eyes, Shades! Kabe and Thompson lock it up and Kabe with a headlock and he takes Thompson down and turns it into a chinlock! Kabe has some choice words with some fans at ringside! Look at his tights! The back of them reads 'Just Look at Me'! How arrogant!"
V.A.: "If Kabe would worry more about his wrestling than the fans at ringside, he could be a champion very soon!"
J.S.: "If I were Kabe, I would make fun of those slugs any chance I could get!"
T.R.: "The very same slugs who pay your checks!"
J.S.: "I don't see their names on them!"
T.R.: "Thompson rams Kabe into the corner to break the hold! Thompson follows it up with rights and lefts before whipping Kabe across to the other corner! Kabe bounces off and Thomspon nails him with a clothesline that almost makes Kabe do a 360! Wow! The fans respond!"
V.A.: "At this point in his career, Thompson is confused as to who he is and what his role should be! I think he would do fine if he would just stabilize his attitude!"
J.S.: "Thomspon just follows the trends, he don't know if he's coming or going! Now, Kabe, he knows EXACTLY what he is doing, and that's why he will have a strap around his waist very soon!"
T.R.: "Thompson settles in with an armbar as Kabe yells at Thompson, trying to escape! This guy even shoots his mouth off when he's in a hold! Look at him trying to taunt Thompson! They get to their feet and Thompson chops Kabe in the chest followed by an arm twist into a short clothesline! Wow!! That shut Kabe's mouth! Thomspon looks briefly out at the fans before dragging Kabe to his feet by the hair!"
J.S.: "And Dingbat Diaper isn't doing a damn thing about it!"
T.R.: "Thompson hits a swinging neckbreaker! Thompson comes off the ropes and measures him with a forearm to the forehead! Now Thompson drives a series of knees into Kabe's head and he is in real trouble now! A pin!! 1....2....Kickout!
V.A.: "Thompson wants nothing more to win this match, because it is common knowledge that Kabe is the top rookie in the FWF, after beating Walter Macdougal in that best 2 out of 3 falls match at Wrestlebowl I!"
J.S.: "Yeah, and this punk Thomspon went out of his way to pick a fight with a man who totally outclasses him in every category! Thompson couldn't even be Kabe's ass-wiper!"
T.R.: "(sigh) Thompson drags Kabe to his feet and whips him in! Tilt-o-whirl backbreaker, nicely done!! 1...2...No!! Thompson copmes off the ropes with a legdrop, but misses!! Kabe rolls out of the ring! Thompson is quickly up and he dives through the ropes and they careen into the railing!! Wow!! Thomspon hit him like a missile!"
V.A.: "I believe Thompson may have rammed his head off the steel railing and yes...I think he's opened up!"
J.S.: "YYEEEAAHHH!!!"
T.R.: "Both men slowly get to their feet and begin exchanging rights and lefts! yes, Thomspon is opened up and Kabe pokes him in the eye and starts working at that wound! He's tearing at it like a wolf that smells blood! Thomspon is yelling in agony as Kabe goes to work! Kabe with a huge right that sends Thompson backwards into the steel steps and he falls back over them! Ouch!"
V.A.: "Kabe is showing a killer instinct that we have not seen before! Could this be the final piece of the puzzle for Kabe?"
J.S.: "You're damn right it is, Victoria! Who do you think told him to be that way!?"
T.R.: "Certainly not you, you coward! Kabe rolls Thomspon back into the ring, but Kabe is feeling the effects of falling back into the railing as he favors his back! He tries to slam Thompson but he falls from the weight! He couldn't hold him up!! 1....2....No!! Close!!"
V.A.: "Kabe may have been more injured than we thought! He did hit the railing hard when Thompson dove out after him! Thomspon almost had the win there!"
J.S.: "Kabe is just playing possum, giving Thompson a false sense of security before he rips out Thompson's jugular vein, just like I told him!"
T.R.: "Kabe is able to collect himself and duck a running clothesline! Kabe turns and jump kicks Thompson right in the mouth and Thompson flips right over the ropes! That wound is just getting worse on Thompson's head! Kabe is going up top!! Double axehandle on Thomspon down on the floor!! Wow!!"
V.A.: "Tony, I just realized that both of these men use basically the same finisher! There is not much difference between the Devastation and the Counterfeiter double underhook facebusters!"
J.S.: "Yeah, except Kabe's has actually gotten him some wins, unlike this pathetic and confused loser Thompson! Like Kabe says, Thompson is a fake!"
T.R.: "Well see who's finisher works here! Right now, Thompson is in serious trouble! Kabe rolls him into the ring and he senses victory! Thompson ducks a kick to the face, misses a clothesline, Kabe kicks him in the gut! Counterfeiter!! 1....2....3!! It's over! Kabe gets the win!"
V.A.: "Thompson may have sealed his own fate with that dive to the outside when he split himself open, but otherwise a good showing from both men, and Kabe gets the check in the Win column!"
J.S.: "That was pretty much a given, Vicky! Thompson never had a chance against the consumate professional that is Ricky Kabe!"
T.R.: "And there you see Kabe out there going at it with the fans here in Washington, I wonder why he is so obnoxious!"
J.S.: "Because he can be! But he better be careful because you never know when one of these thugs will pull out a strap and put a cap in Kabe's ass! This is the murder capital of the world ya know!"
T.R.: "That honor was relinquished from Washington a while ago Jake! We'll be back after this on Fox Sports America!"
(CUT-TO: Backstage where Kevin Kearns and Miss Thang are fooling around in the hallway, spraying each other with water guns. From the distance approaches Assemblyman Weathers along with his entourage of law enforcement.)
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "Excuse me, sir...(Weathers surveys Miss Thang from head to toe, obviously enthralled by her beauty) ...miss? (Weathers adjusts his tie, all the while staring at Miss Thang) Any idea where we can find Mr. Sage?"
KEVIN KEARNS: "(in a sarcastic tone) Sure do, Mr. President."
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "(in a flattered tone) *Oh*, I'm not the President, I'm..."
KEVIN KEARNS: "*And* I'm sure you never will be, not with that piece anyway." (Kearns looks over Mr. Weathers hair)
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: (obviously a little taken back by Kearns remark) "You *said*...you know where Mr. Sage is?"
KEVIN KEARNS: "(in an obnoxiously loud tone) SURE DO!"
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "And where might that be?"
KEVIN KEARNS: "Down this hall here, third door on the right. That's his dressing room."
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "Thank you, sir. You've been most helpful."
(Weathers motions for the officers to follow him down the hallway. As he begins to walk, Miss Thang gives him a couple shots in the back of the head with her water pistol, and mutters the word "pervert", to which Mr. Weathers chooses to ignore as he continues walking, stopping just outside the third door on the right.)
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: "Alright, let's serve this warrant."
(Weathers knocks three time loudly on the door, and after a few seconds, there is still no response. Weathers knocks again three times, slightly louder, but only to the same result.
ASSEMBLYMAN WEATHERS: (turns to one of U.S. Marshals) "Open this door, Marshall."
(The Marshall promptly attempts to open the door, which is locked, and then takes a quick step backward before kicking the door open. Inside we see Jean Rabesque seated on a workbench, wearing only tighty-whities, with his wrestling gear laid out next to him. As Rabesque sits in shock, Assemblyman Weathers along with his entourage quickly walk off in embarrassment. Fade to Commercial)
(The camera comes back from commercial as Jake Shades is seen arguing with some fans down the railing from his broadcast position. Apparently one of the fans threw a beer at him, almost knocking his toupee off. Security rushes in to prevent a confrontation as Tony Ross and Victor Alvarez look on shaking their heads. CUT-TO: Paul Kramer at mid-ring, smiling at the incident. CUEUP: "Body Movin'" by the Beastie Boys. "SUPER-STUD" JT HOLIDAY comes to the ring wearing khaki pants, orange American Eagle fleece, hair style as top is blonde and sides are brown and Ray Ban glasses. Along with JT are two fat ugly girls with him as he walks ahead of them and grabs the mic in the ring)
"SUPER-STUD" JT HOLIDAY: "I knew comin' to WASHINGTON DC, and findin' a good lookin' woman was like findin' a needle in a haystack. I rolled down to the 930 CLUB a couple blocks down! (fans cheer) I walked in as great as I look hopin' to find some talent for myself, stood up at the bar, drank a few beers and began to see TONS OF FUN! I do mean TONS OF FUN! (points at the two fat girls) Look at this. Nothin' but TONS OF FUN! Is this what D.C. has to offer in women? WASHINGTON sucks, and so do the WIZARDS! (crowd boos as trash is thrown) You two big asses can roll yourself into the back and eat some donuts if you want but get the hell out of this ring! (crowd boos) Now onto bigger things, and ladies I don't mean what's down my pants! (ladies scream) Tonight right here in this very ring will be a FATAL 4-WAY HARDCORE MATCH for the EXTREME RING! 'LIGHTS OUT' SCOTT ALLEN, SUICIDE KING, and ASYLUM listen up. Since I couldn't find a freak for the night, I'm lookin' for an EXTREME RING. In order for me to do that, I have to beat your asses right here until I'm the last man standing. I'm callin' the shots around here and tonight in this ring, I will be considered HARDCORE right here in this SCUM-SUCKIN' TOWN OF WASHINGTON!!" (Crowd boos)
(CUT-TO: The locker room of the MCI Center. Suicide King and Scott Allen are engaged in a wild brawl. Suicide King is already opened up)
TONY ROSS: "Oh boy, here we go!! Those two aren't even waiting until they get to the ring!"
VICTOR ALVAREZ: "Well, we're set to go for the Hardcore Match here and already two of the combatants are already fighting it out! Suicide King has been cut open!"
(Allen and Suicide King are pulled apart by security and some wrestlers. CUT-TO: Paul Kramer standing at mid-ring)
PAUL KRAMER: "Our next match is a 4-Way Hardcore Match for the FWF EXTREME RING!!" (Just then, none other than Lady Veronica, wearing a stunning low cut black Gucci dress, walks to the ring bearing a velvet pillow with the large Extreme Ring placed in the middle of it. She climbs into the ring as the males in the crowd react. JT Holiday is noticeably turned on by Veronica)
P.K.: "The winner will recieve the Extreme Ring, which can be used as a weapon in subsequent extreme matches! This match is elimination rules, and the last man standing wins!"
(Holiday comes up from behind Veronica and lightly grabs her hips and starts motioning his hips as if he is grinding with her. Veronica, in the blink of an eye, turns and slaps Holiday so hard his Ray-Bans fly off. Just then, a spotlight swings up to a skybox and Co-Owner Scott Malec is shown standing up with a mic)
SCOTT MALEC: "Hey Holiday!! HANDS OFF!!"
(Holiday makes gestures at Malec up in the skybox as Veronica yells at Holiday before leaving the ring to the cheers)
P.K.: "First, already in the ring, from Long Beach, California, weighing in at 235lbs., JT HOLIDAY!!"
(The crowd roars with boos as Holiday struts around the ring with his arms raised, and favoring his slapped cheek every few seconds)
P.K.: "His opponent, from Osaka, Japan, weighing in at 261lbs., SUICIDE KING!!"
(The crowd gives a mixed reaction, with many cheers, as Suicide King stalks to ringside, with an angry look on his face, with a bandage over his left eye from the previous brawl with Scott Allen.)
P.K.: "Their opponent," (CUE-UP: "Hands of Death" by Rob Zombie and Alice Cooper) "From Seattle's King County Sanitarium, weighing in at 220lbs., ASYLUM!!"
(The crowd boos loudly as Asylum walks to the ring with Daisy and a few fellow inmates in tow. Dasiy is dressed in long sleeved Pokemon pajamas as she nervously chews on her fingernails staring at the crowd. Asylum unfolds two folding chairs for the other two inmates and he orders them to sit down. Asylum then orders Daisy to stand in his corner as the crowd continues to boo, sympathetic to poor Daisy. Asylum gets to the apron and yells at referee Stu Fields to get Suicide King and JT Holiday back)
P.K.; "And the final opponent," (CUE-UP: "Sweet Dreams" by Marilyn Manson) "From South Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, weighing in at 265lbs., "LIGHTS OUT" SCOTT ALLEN!!"
(Allen appears from behind the curtain, standing and absorbing the boos from the D.C. crowd. He is wearing a leather jacket, and it appears to be loaded with miscellaneous items. He is also carrying a bottle of Everclear. Allen circles the ring before climbing in)
TONY ROSS: "We are set to go here for the Extreme Ring, and Scott Allen looks like his jacket is loaded with weapons! The other three guys better watch out!! Ohh!! Suicide King rushes him, but before he can do anything, Allen pulled out a tazer device and stunned S.K.!! S.K. goes down shaking violently! JT Holiday and Asylum get zapped as well!! Good Lord!!"
VICTOR ALVAREZ: "Scott Allen may already have the match won here!! He cut right to the chase!"
JAKE SHADES: "I like this guy's style!"
T.R.: "Yeah, he's a cheap lowlife, just like you!! Allen pulls 3 pairs of handcuffs out of his jacket!! He's going to cuff all 3 men and possibly eliminate them at once! He pulls Holiday up and handcuffs his wrist to one of the turnbuckle clips in the corner! He then drags Asylum to the corner and he handcuffs him to the rope to Holiday's right! He then grabs Suicide King and handcuffs him to Holiday's left!! He has all 3 men trapped and JT Holiday is stuck in the middle!!"
V.A.: "Daisy is entering the ring!"
T.R.: "This poor misguided girl is trying to save her supposed leader from this attack! She jumps on Allen's shoulders but gets deposited to the mat!! Allen rolls her out of the ring and she hits the floor! So much for that! Allen just stands and smiles at the three wrestlers! This is disgusting! Ohhh!! He just kicked Holiday full force in the groin!! Now, he pulls some talcum powder out of his jacket and he blinds Asylum with it and stuns him again!! He's having a field day in there!"
V.A.: "What does he have in store for Suicide King, his biggest enemy in there!?"
T.R.: "Allen goes over and gets his bottle of Everclear! What is he going to do, get him drunk!? Allen produces a lighter!! No!!! Allen flicks the lighter, takes a gulp of Everclear and spits a fireball at Suicide King's face!! Good Lord!!"
V.A.: "I think it only glanced Suicide King, Tony, but it was still enough to burn him!!"
J.S.: "This is brutality at its finest, and I love it! Although I don't think it was necessary to do that to Holiday! He has to perform later on tonight with the ladies!"
T.R.: "You think that fireball was justifiable!?"
J.S.: "Sure, Suicide King killed Allen's brother!"
T.R.: "Well fans, I wasn't going to mention it, but since big mouth here opened his trap, yes, Suicide King and Scott Allen have an ultra-violent history in Japan, and Allen's brother died after a match with Suicide King! That is why there is so much animosity between these two!"
V.A.: "Look, who's coming down the aisle!"
T.R.: "The fans are reacting to Miss Honey as she makes her way to ringside, and if you saw our highlights of the matches not shown on TV, you know that Allen went after Miss Honey earlier on! She walks slowly up to ringside in a short gold bathrobe and is motioning for Allen! She has his full attention! She's waving her fingers at Allen, as if she wants her to follow!"
J.S.: "Hasn't she had enough!?"
T.R,.: "Allen takes off his jacket and climbs out of the ring after her! Miss Honey walks back towards the locker room! Allen is totally enamored with her! She gets to the curtain and walks through, and Allen does the same!! Ohhhh!!! Somebody just decapitated Allen with a chair shot through the curtain!! It was Hacker!! Hacker is now down and screaming in the downed Allen's face, and Hacker drags him behind the curtain!"
J.S.: "What is that idiot doing!? Allen is in a match here and Hacker is pulling him away from it!"
T.R.: "Allen deserved every ounce of that chair shot! Back in the ring, referee Stu Fields has just pulled the keys out of Allen's jacket and he is trying to free each of the wrestlers, who, amazingly enough, have already started to kick and punch at each other! Suicide King had a wet rag placed on him by a ring attendant and he throws it off as he is freed! He wants to fight! But Allen is gone!!"
V.A.: "I can't believe these guys still want to fight after that horrendous attack by Scott Allen! They are completely nuts!
J.S.: "Either that or just really stupid! Except for Holiday! I hope Big Jim and the Twins are OK!"
T.R.: "All 3 of these guys are shaking off the various injuries and it looks like Scott Allen is getting counted out, because he is nowhere in site! Wait, we're going to the back! One of our cameramen has spotted Allen!"
(CUT-TO: Backstage. Scott Allen's head is partially embedded in a computer monitor that was being manned by the FWF's Internet team of Rey Peligro and Wilson Hazard. Hazard and Peligro are standing there not knowing what to do as their connection is cut. Allen is motionless and some blood can be seen trickling out of the busted monitor)
T.R.: "It looks like Hacker has sent Allen quite a message, but is that considered email!?"
J.S.: "Lame joke Ross! That useless no-talent Hacker is gonna get his chops busted for pulling a stunt like that!"
V.A.: "We have wild action in the ring, it looks like all three wrestlers are going to fight this one out to the finish!"
T.R.: "Scott Allen has already been counted out so we are down to Asylum, JT Holiday, and Suicide King! Suicide King has been opened up, stunned, handcuffed and burned, and here he is trading rights with JT Holiday! Asylum jumps on Suicide King from behind as Holiday fights back! S.K. carries Asylum on his back while Holiday punches away at him!"
V.A.: "It looks like Asylum and Holiday may team up against Suicide King and for good reason, this Japanese hardcore legend is as tough as they come!"
T.R.: "Suicide King flips Asylum right off his back and he lands on top of Holiday! Suicide King jumps on the pile!! 1....2...No!! Holiday was somehow able to thrust a shoulder up from under there! Suicide King pulls Asylum off the pile and slams him down, followed by a quick fistdrop! S.K. throws Asylum out of the ring as Holiday gets to his feet! Suicide King picks Holiday up and throws him over the ropes onto Asylum on the floor!! Holy smokes!!"
V.A.: "What a dangerous move by Suicide King! The crowd is really starting to take to him as he is showing what he is made of!"
J.S.: "Yeah, rice and vegetables, just like the rest of those Orientals!"
T.R.: "Look, Allen is already in enough trouble for his racial remarks, we don't need you in the same boat! Suicide King goes to the apron, and ohhh!!! He hits a diving clothesline on Holiday who was getting to his feet! Asylum is somehow able to pick himself off the floor and he rams S.K. from behind!"
V.A.: "And Asylum is proving that he can take just as much as Suicide King can! This could go all night!"
T.R.: "Asylum rakes Suicide King's eyes and he scoops him up!! Ohhh!! Tombstone piledriver on the floor!! He drilled him!! Asylum rubs some more powder out of his eyes, courtesy of Scott Allen! Asylum turns only to be tackled by JT Holiday! Holiday is going to work on Asylum! Holiday dumps Asylum back into the ring, as the ref counts Suicide King!"
V.A.: "Suicide King may be counted out here!! Wait!! He's getting up!! Amazing!!"
J.S.: "This guy has been watching too many Godzilla movies! Die already!!"
T.R.: "S.K. barely rolls into the ring to avoid the count as Holiday DDTs Asylum! Holiday rolls out of the ring and he's digging under the ring! He pulls out a table!"
J.S.: "I just love how those are always stored there!"
T.R.: "Holiday sets up the table, and he lays it across the railing and the apron! He goes in to retrieve Asylum, who is laid out! He drags Asylum to the outside and he has him on the apron! Suicide King is lying in the ring and he doesn't know where he is!! What is Holiday going to do!!? A powerbomb!!?? No!! Asylum blocks it!! Asylum with a low blow and he pulls Holiday into the powerbomb position!! Ohhhh!!!!"
(Ross goes silent as Asylum powerbombs Holiday through the table from the apron, as the crowd gets the ECW 'Holy Sh!t" chant going again, and is censored)
V.A.: "Could that have topped Hardcore's performance earlier tonight!? It's hard to tell!! What a spectacular move!!"
J.S.: "I think JT is dead!"
T.R.: "Wait, Suicide King is mounting the turnbuckles!! How is this man still alive!? He leaps!! Ohhhh my dear sweet Lord!!!"
(The "Holy SH!t" chant starts right up again)
V.A.: "Suicide King just hit a moonsault from the top rope onto Asylum who was just getting up from the wreckage of the powerbomb he performed on the floor!! Incredible!! Inconceivable!!"
J.S.: "Oh shut up!!"
T.R.: "What an amazing series of moves! Something is stirring in the wreckage! It's Suicide King! He is able to pull himself into the ring as Stu Fields lays down the count! Holiday is next to stir, and he drags his mangled body into the ring, and he is bleeding from the broken table shards that pierced his body! Suicide King drags himself to his feet and catches Holiday coming into the ring! Big body slam!!"
V.A.: "I can't believe this!! Suicide King is going to the top rope!! Where is he getting thsi energy from!?"
T.R.: "He waits for Holiday to stagger to his feet and he leaps! Holiday is facing away from him!! A moonsault into a DDT!! My God, I have never seen anything like that in my life!! Unreal!! 1.....2....3!!! Listen to this crowd!!"
J.S.: "So the guy can flip around and dive into tables! He hasn't won anything yet!! Asylum is alive!!"
T.R.: "That moonsault DDT was one of the most spectacular moves we have ever seen and you want to downplay it, Shades!? You are an idiot! Asylum grabs a chair! He enters the ring from behind Suicide King and he swings and hits S.K. in the back of the knees!! S.K. collapses in a bloody heap! Asylum rolls Suicide King on top of the chair!! ASylum goes up top!! Ohhh!!! A shooting star press onto Suicide King on the chair!! 1.....2.....3!!! We have a winner among this carnage!!"
V.A.: "What a display of courage and stamina by these wrestlers! It's too bad that Allen was taken out early because who knows what he would have been capable of here!"
J.S.: "At least these guys are bleeding like stuck pigs! That kind of makes my day!"
T.R.: "You are sick! Here comes Stu Fields with the Extreme Ring on the pillow that Lady Veronica brought down earlier!"
J.S.: "I can't believe that babe is with a goon like Malec! I possess far more sex appeal and charisma then that overbearing tyrant!
T.R.: "Only in your wildest dreams, Shades! Stu Fields puts the Extreme Ring on Asylum, who collapses on the ropes trying to hold himself up! Daisy is ecstatic as the ring is placed on Asylum! The two inmates that were at ringside have entered the ring to celebrate as well!"
V.A.: "Somebody's coming out of the crowd!!"
J.S.: "It's DRAVEN!!"
T.R.: "Yes it is!! Ashe Draven pushes his way through the DC crowd and he has his Singapore cane! He slides into the ring and mounts the second turnbuckle!! He comes down and rams the Cane right onto the back of Asylum's head!! Oh my!! This is getting out of hand already! The man just won one of the most violent matches in FWF history!"
V.A.: "Draven looks to be here to send a message, and he grabs the mic from Paul Kramer!"
ASHE DRAVEN: "OK, let's see here, Malec holds a 4-Way Match for the new Extreme Title in the FWF, the Extreme Ring, and he doesn't invite the man who INVENTED extreme wrestling? The man who basically DEFINED the word HARDCORE for the last 5 years in this sport?? I consider that as an insult and a slap in the face, Malec. I already helped in taking out 4 or 5 of your precious stars at the Pay-Per-View last week....so if you don't book me against this pathetic excuse for an extreme wrestler (points at the downed Asylum) next week, this is only the beginning!"
(Draven hits Asylum with the Cane twice more in the ribs before exiting the ring)
T.R.: "Yes, Draven has delivered his message, and he wants to be the holder of the Extreme Ring! What a cowardly way of delivering his message, by attacking Asylum, who was already beaten to a pulp! Now I don't like Asylum, but that was just wrong!"
J.S.: "Oh quit being so condescending! Draven can't help the way he is, he was born and bred that way! Believe me, I know the man! And he is right, this IS only the beginning!"
T.R.: "Fans, while the DC EMTs take care of JT Holiday, Asylum, and Suicide King, we have to take a break! We will return right after this live from the MCI Center!"
(Fade to Commercial)
(The camera comes back from commercial and it does a slow pan of the MCI Center. From deep within recesses of the MCI Center, the rumblings of a motorcycle is heard. The crowd rises in anticipation, when suddenly "Shape of Things" by the Jeff Healy Band blares over the loudspeakers. The crowd pops HARD as the FWF National Champion, Nevada Smith bursts through the curtain, astride his Harley; his title belt draped over his shoulder. Right behind him, choosing to walk is Jean Rabesque, the FWF Frontier Champion, his belt also in tow. The D.C. crowd gives the duo a monstrous ovation as they approach the ring. At ringside, Nevada dismounts his cycle, rolls into the ring, and stalks around, looking a tad impatient. Rabesque seems slightly more subdued as he climbs into the ring, and motions for a microphone. He gets it, and paces around for a moment, waiting for the crowd to quiet down a bit....)
JEAN RABSEQUE: "Warriors....are more than people who know how fight through adversity, to win a war despite the odds. It takes a measure of intelligence to win a fight sometimes. People like Nevada and myself......we possess this intelligence. After what happened at Wrestlebowl, we could very easily have flown off the handle and tried to win this war against the likes of Wicks, Roberts, Draven, Minion and Golem....as individuals. But we're smarter than that.....We recognize that there comes a time when you have to put aside your differences with your enemies, and make them your allies, if not your friends. Matthews.....I don't think it would surprise anyone if they knew that you and Nevada aren't trading Christmas cards this year, but the fact is....we NEED you. What I'm offering you....is your best chance to BURY the ones that left you laying in the middle of the ring at the Garden. I'm not asking for you to like us, I'm only asking that you *tolerate* us......Give it a little thought. Now, we've got another issue to address, and I'm gonna let the Serpent handle it....."(Rabesque hands the mic to Nevada)
NEVADA SMITH: "Y'know.....I had hard time getting to sleep a few nights back, so I got up, and decided to pop in the tape of Wrestlebowl, and watch me win my title back again and then get my ass handed to me...AGAIN. With me it's like a kind of therapy, and when I get my hands on Wick and Roberts tonight, that's all I'm gonna be thinking about when I send their narrow asses up the God-Damned Potomac River!! (Crowd pops hard again, and Nevada sneers) But there's something else I've been wondering about.....something that doesn't make a helluva lot of sense to me.......Y'see, at Wrestlebowl....there was one guy in that whole sorry mess who managed to make it out of that cage in one piece.....I'm talkin' about that Injun-Joe, tobacco-smoking kemosabe, Stone Wolf! Now-- (crowd pops HARD at Stone Wolf's name. Nevada glares at them and sneers again)..Yeah, sure....that pretty much proves my point right there. Everybody in this arena is all high on your sorry ass, Wolfman. But that doesn't tell me just how you managed to get out of that ring when it got a bit too hot.....(some light booing can be heard from the crowd)..... Now, I don't deal in rumors, but Wolfy and I have never been too friendly. We locked horns a few months back and I beat his ass all over the ring, but Injun Joe's been walking around saying he won ever since. I don't think he can STAND it that I'm walking around with this strap on my (points to the National Title) shoulder. And the thing is, he didn't have enough below the waist to CHEAT me out of my victory at Wrestlebowl, him being the special ref 'n all, so *I* think he got together with a few simple minds before the match, and tried to put Jean and me in the hospital. Of course, Wolfy fights them off to make it look convincing, but as soon as we're all out of the picture, he goes and takes a walk. (the booing louder now, but Nevada doesn't seem fazed) Wolfman....I want an explanation, and you better make it snappy, before I decide to go and BEAT one out of you....."
{Nevada tosses the mic to the ground, and with another sneer, he and Jean begin to walk out of the ring. And then.....The Lights Go Out. The crowd pops HARDCORE, and a lonely wolf howl PIERCES the darkness. The howl fades into "Right Now" by Van Halen.....A single Black spotlight shines on the entranceway, and we can see a single form. He begins to walk forward amidst the tremendous ovation. Halfway up the aisle, he stops, and the music abruptly cuts out and the lights come up. In one hand, Stone Wolf carries a microphone of his own, while in the other, he holds the FWF Cable Television Championship belt. Nevada sneers down at him from the ring, and Stone Wolf breaks into a scornful smile...)
STONE WOLF: "You'd never think that *Warriors* like this could be such creative thinkers......That seems to be the norm, these days. On one hand, I've got a guy like Minion, gunning for my title, and trying to tell me that his (coughs) "War Machine" destroyed my.....friends. And now we've got the National Champion, demanding an explanation from ME, because *I* was smart enough to get out of the ring when the odds got to be five on one. Nevada, I want you to understand something....if I had a problem with seeing you as the National Champion, TRUST ME.....I would find a way to make sure it didn't happen....one way or another. Anyhow, I promised myself I wouldn't be as longwinded as you were, because I've got a title defense coming up. So I'll tell you the same thing I told Minion........I DON'T CARE, boys.....not about you, not about who's National Champion, not about this cute little war you're content to wage with the other side. If somebody like Minion, or Roberts or Wicks or Draven comes after me, I'll deal with them.....MY way.....And that goes for anybody who isn't satisfied with my....EXPLANATION....."
(Nevada's sneer grows even colder. Stone Wolf casts one last look at him, returns the cold look, turns and walk back down the aisle.)
NEVADA SMITH: "Yeah, we'll see where you stand Injun' Joe, we'll see!"
(As Stone Wolf disappears behind the curtain, Nevada and Rabesque climb out of the ring staring at the curtain that Stone Wolf just exited through)
TONY ROSS: "Can you believe what we just saw?? The three FWF singles champions engaged in a verbal battle! Nevada and Rabesque want to know where Stone Wolf stands, and he just basically told them he doesn't care one way or another!"
JAKE SHADES: "Who cares?? All three of those guys are just going to get destroyed tonight by Minion, Wicks, and Roberts, so does it matter!?"
T.R.: "That remains to be seen Jake! Let's take it up to Paul!"
PAUL KRAMER: "In our next match. coming to the ring," (CUE-UP: "White Slavey" by Type O Negative) "From Seattle, Washington, weighing in at 265lbs., JOE MASSACRE!! He is accompanied by Number One Fan!"
(The crowd erupts in boos as Massacre walks to the ring with Number One Fan at his side in a black leather bra and leather shorts. Massacre threatens a few fans on his way down)
P.K.: "And his opponent," (CUE-UP: "Warsaw" by Joy Division) "From No Sun City, weighing in at 312lbs., BLACK SAGE!!"
(No one emerges from the curtain. CUT-TO: The hallway leading to the locker room entrance. Assemblyman Weathers along with the Marshals and a few DC policemen are waiting for Black Sage to make his entrance. Instead, Miss Thang dances by them in a tight black sundress to distract them. CUT-TO: The crowd. Black Sage is making his way through the crowd to the ring)
T.R.: "It looks like Black Sage is doing his best to avoid Assemblyman Weathers and his entourage!"
(CUT-TO: Backstage. Weathers is obviously embarassed that he has been outsmarted. CUT-TO: Ringside)
T.R.: "Black Sage hits the ring with a fury, and it looks like Weathers is not going to try and arrest Black Sage here!"
V.A.: "I wonder what Black Sage did to get these guys on his case!?"
J.S.: "My guess is child pornography!"
T.R.: "Shut up! Sage and Massacre are tearing into each other here! Miss Thang and Number One Fan are on either side of the ring to offer support here!"
J.S.: "And I can't decide who's bones I want to jump first!"
T.R.: "Oh please! Sage and Massacre are just throwing everything they have at each other, and I have to believe that Sage is distracted by the presence of Cornelius Weathers! Sage starts pummeling the back of Massacre and he goes down! A big kick to Massacre's ribs! He pulls Massacre back up by the hair and he body slams him down!"
V.A.: "Both of these men are just huge brawlers, and we're not going to see a lot of pure wrestling here!"
T.R.: "Sage pulls him up and hits a German suplex into a bridge!! 1....2....No!! Close! Number One Fan starts pounding on the mat to get his man going! Sage pulls him up and whips him in! Running clothesline!! What impact! Sage splashes and covers!! 1...2...Kickout!! Sage is on fire here!"
V.A.: "Sage is also using a lot of energy and we'll see if the big man has the endurance to last with Massacre!"
J.S.: "It doesn't matter because the guy has to worry about a few years in the slammer after the match! I hope he's got some KY Jelly stockpiled!"
T.R.: "Enough! Sage slaps on a chinlock to slow things up a bit! There you see Miss Thang at rinsgide looking on intently! She is here to counter any interference from Number One Fan! Massacre battles to his feet with a few elbow thrusts but Sage is still holding on to the chinlock! Wow!! Massacre grabbed him and flipped Sage over but he held on to the chinlock!! But they are in the ropes and the hold has to be broken here!"
J.S.: "If Miss Thang would bend over the apron just a little more...."
T.R.: "Stop it!! Massacre gets a big boot to the gut in and he nails Sage with a bulldog! Massacre gets on top of Sage and just starts labeling him with rights and lefts!! Sage reverses it and now he is on top pounding away!! This is breaking down into a school yard fight!"
V.A.: "That's all these guys know, Tony! You see that scar on the back of Sage's neck? That was from a high school knife fight!"
J.S.: "Actually, I heard it was from the yardstick the nuns used to whack him with at Sunday school!"
T.R.: "The referee somehow separates them and they lock up, fighting for superiority! Neither man is budging! Wait! Massacre backs Sage into the corner and hits a monster uppercut! Massacre lifts him up and places him on the turnbuckle!! Superplex!! With authority!! Massacre rolls on top!! 1....2...No!! Great move by Massacre!"
V.A.: "Tony, Michael Kerrigan is coming to ringside! He's coming over here!"
J.S.: "No, tell him to go away! I'm nauseated enough as it is!"
(Kerrigan can be heard grabbing the headset as Massacre dumps Sage out of the ring)
T.R.: "Well, welcome to the broadcast booth, 'Dragon', it's good to have you here!"
MICHAEL KERRIGAN: "Shut up Ross, I'm not here to trade pleasantries with you!"
J.S.: "Heh heh...he told you..."
M.K.: "You shut your mouth too!"
(Massacre starts to carve on Sage's forehead with something resembling a scalpel as Number One Fan distracts Diaper)
"For those of you, who don't know. Role that DAMN CLIP..." (INSERT Massacre hitting Kerrigan, from the PPV.) I had the match WON...MINION was defeated and I was about to move on, to bigger and better things. But out comes MASSACRE... One man who I NEVER thought, not for even one SECOND. Had the guts to come out on PAY PER VIEW and do what he DID. So for that, I give him a whole lot of CREDIT. But that was the first, of perhaps two mistakes. The first... Nobody comes in between me and my opponent, because I had the MINION BROKEN. He laid at my feet, like nothing more that a sack of GARBAGE. MINION was done, but out comes MASSACRE. Who just so happens, to hit me from BEHIND. One...Two...Three... MINION gets the WIN, enough said. Now brings me, to his second mistake. Never and I mean NEVER, let me get back up. But I'll tell you something...I think he knocked something lose, no more Mister NICE GUY. Because MASSACRE, I think you did me a favor. Because you've opened a door, that has been closed for some time. So get ready, the two of us will come FACE to FACE. But don't hold your breath, because it will happen SOONER rather than LATER. But MINION, don't think I've forgotten about YOU. Because we haven't even written the final chapter, in a book that will never end."
(Massacre spots Kerrigan at ringside and lets off his hold on Sage. He goes to the ropes and points at Kerrigan and starts yelling)
M.K.: "Just worry about what's going on in the ring, dead man, I'm not ready to take you out yet!"
(Kerrigan takes off his headset and walks up to ringside, not taking too kindly to Massacre's insults)
T.R.: "This is going to get wild in a hurry! Massacre is arguing with Kerrigan and Sage sneaks up from behind! Sitting rollup by Sage!! 1....2...Ohhhh!!! So close!! Sage almost had him! Massacre is right up, swings and misses, Sage kicks him in the stomach and hits an atomic drop!"
V.A.: "Number One Fan is up on the apron!"
J.S.: "And looking ohhhh-so fine!! Ha ha!"
T.R.: "Referee Sal Putz is over to get her down, and she grabs Putz and plants a deep kiss on him!! She's holding him there!"
V.A.: "Somebody's running to the ring! Who in the world is that!?"
J.S.: "It's Telly Savales!"
T.R.: "No it's not, you ignoramous! The man is dead! Some tall bald guy all dressed in black just hit the ring! He hits Sage with a vicious boot to the head!! He powerbombs Sage with authority and leaves the ring!"
V.A.: "Miss Thang is over and she pulls Number One Fan off of Sal Putz!! Now they are going at it again!!"
J.S.: "YEEEEAAAHHH!!! This is better than my apartment mud wrestling tapes!!"
T.R.: "Miss Thang and Number One Fan are going at it as Putz tries to restarin them on the outside! Massacre is covering Sage but no one is there to make the count! Wait!! Michael Kerrigan rolls into the ring with a chair!! Ohhh!!! He clobbers Massacre in the back of the head, just like Massacre did to him at Wrestlebowl! What a shot!"
V.A.: "Now Massacre is out, and Sage is able to throw an arm over Massacre!!" T.R.: "Kerrigan goes over and yells at Putz to make the count!! 1....2....3!! Black Sage gets the win with some unexpected assistance from Michael Kerrigan!"
V.A.: "Well, Kerrigan got revenge for Massacre screwing up his match with Minion, but something tells me this is all far from over!"
J.S.: "I hope Miss Thang and Number One Fan is far from over! They're gonna lose their tops over there!! Yeeaaahh!!"
T.R.: "Black Sage is able to roll out of the ring and pulls Miss Thang away as Number One Fan goes to check on Massacre! She didn't see Kerrigan lay Massacre out with the chair! Sage is bleeding and...wait a minute!"
V.A.: "Here comes Assemblyman Weathers!"
(Assemblyman Weathers along with his entourage of law enforcement make their way down the aisle to an enormous response of jeers from the crowd. Following closely behind them are Joe Lebron and Scott Malec to ensure nothing gets out of hand. As Sage notices them headed down the aisle, he quickly makes his way over, and approaches them. Both of the Marshals draw their guns on Sage as he approaches Assemblyman Weathers, obviously out of fear of his size, but Sage simply stops in front of them and extends both arms outward to be cuffed. Sage doesn't offer a shred of emotion during the entire arrest, from the time they cuff him, all the way through reading him his rights. However, as they begin escorting Sage out of the building, up the aisle way...Miss Thang abruptly jumps on Assemblyman Weathers back and starts pulling at his hair, ripping off a toupee in the process, but Lebron and Malec quickly manage to pull Miss Thang off the Assemblyman, and restrain her as he rushes off in further humiliation)
T.R.: "Ha ha ha!! Did you see that!? Looks like Weathers needs to pay a visit to Mr. Sperling! Looks like he shops at the same lid place you do Shades!"
J.S.: "Screw off Ross! At least I have hair on my cajones, which is more than I can say for you!"
V.A.: "Sage did not even fight that arrest, so he obviously is guilty of something, and who knows what he did wrong!"
T.R.: "Well, Black Sage won what may be his last match here in the FWF! We will return right after this on Fox Sports America!"
(Fade to commercial as Black Sage, Miss Thang, Weathers and his entourage, and Malec and Lebron exit through the curtain)
(The camera comes back from commercial with an aerial shot of the MCI Center from the helicopter that brought Malec, Dread, and LeBron in. The shot cross-fades to the inside of the MCI Center as the fans cheer wildly. CUE-UP: "Cemetary Gates" by Pantera)
JAKE SHADES: "It is time to hear from our savior, my lord and liege, the man the Wickers all worship and love, THE IKON has returned!!"
TONY ROSS: "Did he write that down for you and pay you to say all that??"
J.S.: "Hell no, I did it out of respect!"
T.R.: "Oh, that was a lot to remember!"
(Abel Wicks emerges from the curtain to a thunderous chorus of boos, wearing ripped up jeans and a Slayer T-shirt. Accompanying him is a man dressed all in black and a black trenchcoat, wearing a black and red "Mephisto" style mask)
VICTOR ALVAREZ: "Is that who I think it is with Wicks??"
T.R.: "Nahhhhh!"
J.S.: "Who do you think it is, Vicky?"
V.A.: "Michael Manson wore a mask like that a few years back, it was one of his personas! Could it be him!?"
J.S.: "Ya never know what the Wiccinator will pull out of his sacred rear-end!"
(Wicks and his companion enter the ring and he grabs the mic from Paul Kramer)
ABEL WICKS: "As each and everyone of you saw at the Pay-Per-View, the Wicker defeated Jean Roddenberry...however due to politics..the FWF is now claiming that somehow Jean won after a bastardized pin. No matter...the Wickman knows he won...and so do the Wickheads high and low. As for the world title itself, Jean can put up his ass for all the IKON cares....for the time has come to move on. besides, you can peel off the silver foil on it that looks like metal. Its not like the Wicker paid for that title...or the frontier title. No, they might think it was taken out of the Wickman's salary but he was re-compensated by the very individual who paid to create the world title and helped bring the Wickaholic to the FWF...and he's watching as the IKON now goes..to truly save the FWF....he must take the National Title from Nebraska and make it the International Title. So the IKON would like Mister Malec to walk out here right now and book the world title match."
(After a few seconds, a spotlight swings up to the skybox Malec, LeBron and Dread are seated in and Malec begins to make his way down the stairs to the ring. Accompanying him is Lady Veronica, still in her stunning Gucci dress. The fans cheer as Malec climbs in, and as soon he steps through the ropes, Wicks attacks him and pounds him to the mat)
T.R.: "What is going on here! Is this guy nuts! He's attacking his own boss!!"
J.S.: "Hell YEEEAAHH!! It's about time somebody stood up to that egomaniac tyrant! Kick his ass Wicker! Make him BLLEEEED!!"
V.A.: "He just slapped the Wicks of Saturn on him! He has Malec in the Wicks of Saturn!"
T.R.: "And Lady Veronica jumps on top of Wicks and is kicking and punching at him! Let's not forget that Lady V is a very dangerous woman, being very skilled in the martial arts!"
J.S.: "But no match for the Wickster!"
T.R.: "Wicks has her on top of him as he backs into the corner and rams Lady V into it! This crowd is incensed! Garbage is flying as Wicks looks out to them and smiles sarcastically! All the while Wicks' companion has been watching this!? Could it be Manson!?"
V.A.: "Here comes security! They're flooding the ring and they are going to haul Wicks out of there! Malec is stirring on the mat, he looks to be somewhat conscious!"
J.S.: "Hey, LeBron is down there too, maybe Wicks can hit him with the Ikon-Maker!"
T.R.: "He's done enough damage! Wicks is escorted out along with his companion, and Malec is sitting up and shaking off the attack! He checks on Lady V and whispers something in her ear! She immediately rolls out of the ring and heads for the locker room! I wonder what she is up to! Lebron is in the ring checking on his partner!"
V.A.: "This could cost Wicks very dearly here! It's bad enough he already paid for the new Frontier belt!"
J.S.: "Money is nothing to the 'Ikon'!"
T.R.: "Lebron hands Malec a mic!"
SCOTT MALEC: "Man, I'll tell you what, I just keep getting myself involved in this crap, and this is what I get, a beating! A pattern is developing here! Wicks, before I start ranting and raving about fines and suspensions, I'm gonna do the next best thing! I WILL grant that Falls Count Anywhere Match to you for the Main Event! (Crowd roars) Why? Because I want to see Nevada Smith and Jean Rabesque kick your sorry tail all over this city and back again! I don't care if they take you to the White House, the Pentagon, they can drag you to Baltimore for all I care! But...there is one more thing!"
(Lady V emerges from the curtain bearing Abel Wicks' fake World Title belt that Jean Rabesque won from him at the Pay-Per-View. Lebron brings a wastebasket in the ring from the announcer's table and places it in front of Malec. Malec then pulls a lighter out of his suit pocket. Lady V holds the belt dangling over the wastebasket. Malec has a small bottle of lighter fluid and he pours it on the belt)
S.M.: "I fight fire with fire!"
(Malec lights the belt and it ignites like a match. The crowd roars in approval as Malec drops the burning belt into the wastebasket as all three stare into the small inferno. The camera zooms in on the smoke and fades to commercial)
(The camera comes back from commercial, scanning the MCI Center, it focuses in on a skybox where Wilson Hazard is about to conduct an interview with Kraven and Flatliner.. Czar is nowhere to be found..) WH: "Good evening, I am Wilson Hazard and I am here tonight with Kraven and Flatliner high above the MCI Center in one of its luxury skyboxes! Controversy surrounds you guys and it only deepens with the strange alliance you have with Nevada Smith!"
(Kraven cuts him off)
KRAVEN: "Our alliance with Nevada is of no concern to you! Your concern at this moment is whether Flatliner decides to toss you over the railing or not! So stop asking questions that are none of your business!"
WH: "I'm sorry Kraven, it won't happen again.. How are you enjoying the matches so far?"
KRAVEN: "The only match that interests us is the tag team match! All hell is going to break out! Everyone knows that we are the real champions!"
WH: "It is clear and evident that you guys are after the tag titles! But there are other teams that are vying for them also and they are higher in the rankings, how do you.."
(Kraven again cuts him off)
KRAVEN: "You're as ignorant as you are ugly! It is as clear as that big nose of yours that the FWF suits don't want us to obtain those belts! We have annihilated every single individual they can team up against us, yet we cannot get another title match cause we chose NOT to allow Golem to be a factor in it! But it's quite all right! You see Malec, and you also LeBron, it doesn't mean a thing that we have somehow been forgotten, we didn't come here to curry favors with anyone, we came here to fight! To inflict pain, to punish anyone one stupid enough to get in our way! The tag champions are champions because we chose NOT to beat them with the help of a peon walking around with a claw! It so infuriates the FWF that we have chosen to be NOT "the chosen ones" but the "renegades" that go against every single grain there is!"
WH: "I didn't know the FWF had "chosen ones", I thought..." (Kraven cuts him off)
KRAVEN: "Well guess what? You THOUGHT wrong! Every fed has their "chosen ones" they are called different things in different feds! Take you for instance! You are what we call the ass kissing fool that risks life and limb to get an interview! And the only reason why you even got this interview is because we let you! So shut the hell up and listen to what I have to say! It doesn't matter that McMillan and Kearns decided to cut blood with Sage! (Smirks and looks at Flatliner, they both laugh) Yea we know Sage all right, we know who he is and what he is! He's a man with a death wish! Look around! What do you see? You see NOTHING! Nothing but a grim dark alley in which you all eventually have to transverse! Knowing full damn well, what awaits!"
WH: "I didn't know that the FWF had hardcore!"
(Flatliner grabs him and pulls him up from his seat, Kraven intervenes as he with a very devious smirk calms Flatliner down.. Wilson is dropped abruptly back into his chair.. Kraven laughs and brushes him off mocking him
KRAVEN: "You should know better than to stare at him, that's a challenge to him.. But no the FWF hasn't gone hardcore WE are not "hardcore"! What we are is the most dangerous unit you will EVER want to come across! Have you seen the Roberts brothers lately? I heard that they decided to find another form of making a living; we persuaded them that this wasn't the right business for them! We clipped the BOP's wings and brought them down to earth! You see Hazard they all have flaws! They all have chinks in their armor! Eventually trust and loyalty are put to the test and time and time again, it has crumbled every alliance, every gang and every group! Their foundations are weak and stand on feet of clay!"
WH: "Who do you think are the chosen ones?" (Flatliner explodes and screams into Hazard's face)
FLATLINER: "We ARE! We are the ones chosen to bring pain and misery to all those who think they can be the chosen ones! We are what every man fears, what every man dreads!"
KRAVEN: "What he means Flats, is who are the FWF's chosen ones! And that is as obvious as your ignorance Wilson; everyone knows that Malec and LeBron's heartthrobs are none other than the Chicago clown KK and the Pandorian tricycle rider Maelstrom!
WH: "Wait a minute! I thought that KK and Maelstrom, while they do share a friendship and have done business together they do not wrestle here in the FWF! That was in total agreement with them! Can you explain?"
KRAVEN: (Gets into Hazard's face, Flatliner starts to growl and sneer, he grumbles out KK's and Maelstrom's name) "EXPLAIN? You want me to explain the obvious? The ONLY reason they do not wrestle here is because we put a stop to that! We totally wasted them and they decided against it! Just like JC, they are history!"
WH: "Speaking of JC, what happened there? What happened to the NEH?"
(Flatliner rushes Wilson who is wide eyed and paralyzed in place; it is Kraven who stops Flatliner)
KRAVEN: "How many tines do we have to tell you peons that JC and the NEH is none of your business! That is family matters! Let's just say it was purified! All the mongrels have been tossed out and what remains is US! The Unholy Alliance!"
WH: "So you're saying that you, Flatliner along with Czar and Nevada are still NEH?"
KRAVEN: "No, you are! I didn't say a damn thing you are just assuming that it is! Just like LeBron and Malec think that THEY were the ones to put the last nails into the NEH coffin! Let them keep thinking that let them relish on that idiotic belief! And no matter what they do, or who they put in front of us we are going to beat them into the ground! They both know that we are dead serious, they know that it's not about the fame, or the money and not even the gold! We have all that and in abundance!"
WH: "Then what is all this brutality and savagery about?"
KRAVEN: It's about deprivation! Depriving every one else of their dreams, of their hopes! To give them a very heavy dose of the grim reality!"
WH: "And that is?"
(With very sadistic eyes he glares into the camera and says)
KRAVEN: "You'll see! Now get out!"
(The camera fades to Paul Kramer standing at mid-ring as Wilson Hazard is thrown out of the skybox)
PAUL KRAMER: "In our next match, coming to the ring," (CUE-UP: "God Bless the Bums" by Comeshot) "From Parts Unknwon, weighing in at 238lbs., GOLEM!!"
(The crowd boos loudly as Golem comes to the ring staring at the fans. When he gets to the ring, he holds the claw high up in the air and gets even louder boos)
P.K.: "And his opponent," (CUE-UP: "Unforgiven" by Metallica) "From Chicago, Illinois, weighing in at 201lbs., BILLY MATTHEWS!!"
(The crowd erupts as Matthews jogs to the ring with a stern look on his face, not paying attention to the crowd reaction)
TONY ROSS: "Well we've seen Malec and Lebron burn Wicks' fake World Title, we've seen Kraven and Flatliner basically threaten everybody in the FWF, what else!?"
JAKE SHADES: "I predict Miss Thang, Number One Fan, Miss Honey, and Sadie Jackson will all come out here and have a Miss Nude FWF Contest!"
T.R.: "How perverted can you be!?"
VICTOR ALVAREZ: "Matthews and Golem are set to go here, and I can't help but think about Jean Rabesque's call to arms! Apparently even though Matthews has helped Rabesque on occassion, he is not interested in joining his side!"
J.S.: "Oh, Rabesque is just wetting his pants over the fact that all his Mercenaries basically left the country after continuously getting their teeth kicked in! Rabesque needs all the friends he can get!"
T.R.: "He has the bext backup any man can have, the National Champion Nevada Smith!"
J.S.: "Yeah, until Nevada turns on him like a sit-in-spin!"
V.A.: "Golem and Matthews were both involved in that massive brawl after the Main Event of Wrestlebowl I and there is definitely bad blood here! Golem has the mic!"
GOLEM: "If any of you cretins are dumb enough to believe that I need any help for this match, you need to get off whatever mind-altering drugs you were on, because I need NO help from ANYONE!"
(Golem throws the mic to the outside)
T.R.: "Matthews just stares at Golem, who is trying to intimidate him with his claw! Golem moves in and gets kicked in the stomach! Matthews grabs him in a headlock takeover and holds on to Golem's head! Matthews squeezes on the pressure! Golem rakes Matthews' eyes with a free hand to break the hold!"
J.S.: "Cheater!"
T.R.: "Yeah, but it's pure genius when Golem does it, right!?"
J.S.: "Anything Golem does is pure genius!"
T.R.: "Golem and Matthews circle each other lock up and this time, Golem gets the eye rake in!"
J.S.: "Genius!"
T.R.: "Golem punches Matthews in the jaw and hits a Russian Leg Sweep! Golem rolls on top and immediately tries to put on the claw!! Matthews is blocking his hand! Matthews is trying to hold him off and is doing a good job of it! Matthews is able to throw a leg over the ropes and referee Stu Fields makes Golem get off!"
J.S.: "Fields just saved Matthews life!"
T.R.: "Matthews saved himself! Matthews back to his feet and gets kicked in the knee and he goes down! Golem stomps away at Matthews who is trying to keep from falling out of the ring! Fields warns Golem and he pushes right past Fields and stomps Matthews some more! Fields pushes him away!
V.A.: "That wasn't genius on Golem's part, because all he is doing now is buying Matthews more time!"
T.R.: "Golem rushes Matthews and Matthews ducks and flips him over the ropes! Golem lands hard!"
J.S.: "Aw come on Golem, quit playing with this punk and just kill him with the claw already and do us all a favor!"
T.R.: "Matthews is climbing up top!! Body press to the floor!! Wow!! He hit it perfectly! Golem smacks the concrete with Matthews on top of him! That took the starch right out of him! Matthews gets up slowly as the fans at ringside egg him on! He grabs Golem and runs him facefirst into the ring steps! He follows that with a shoulder ram into the post!"
V.A.: "Golem is taking a beating out there!
J.S.: "Let's not kid ourselves here, Golem is just warming up!"
T.R.: "Matthews rolls Golem back into the ring and he's going back up top! He misses with a flying dropkick, Golem dives out of the way! Golem collects himself and goes on thre attack! More boots for Matthews' midsection! He pulls Matthews up by the hair and yells out to the crowd, who respond with nothing but boos!"
J.S.: "The Claw! The Claw!"
V.A.: "If Golem gets it on, it's over! We all know how dangerous it is!"
T.R.: "Matthews ducks a right and a left and he responds with shots of his own! Standing dropkick sends Golem to the mat! Golem back up and gets levelled with a clothesline! Matthews goes to the apron! springboard headscissors!! The crowd responds!"
V.A.: "And Wayne Roberts is making his way to ringside! No doubt he's here to interfere!"
T.R.: "Matthews pulls Golem up and gets kneed in the groin! Golem chops him in the chest and Matthews falls to the mat! What is Golem doing!? He's undoing the turnbuckle! He's going to expose the steel!"
J.S.: "Hopefully so he can rearrange Matthews' pretty boy mush!"
T.R.: "Roberts is up on the apron and Golem is looking angrily at him! Roberts points at Matthews who is coming from behind! Golem turns and quickly kicks Matthews in the gut and pushes him into the exposed turnbuckle and he cracks heads with Roberts on the apron! Matthews bounces off and Golem slaps the Claw on!!"
J.S.: "YEAH!! YEAHHH!!!"
T.R.: "He's got him hooked!! Matthews slumps to the mat and Stu Fields raises his arm once...twice...three times!! It's over!! Golem has beaten Matthews, with the inadvertant help of Roberts!"
J.S.: "He's not letting go!! Keep it on him, keep it on him!!"
V.A.: "Tony, Jean Rabesque and Nevada Smith have appeared from behind the curtain! The fans are screaming for them to help!"
T.R.: "They are just standing there and watching!! Golem won't let go of the Claw! Finally, Golem lets off and calls for the mic!"
GOLEM: "I said I didn't need any help!!" (Golem pushes Roberts, turns and glances at the bleeding Matthews and smiles) "But this time, I'll let it slide! Ha ha!!"
T.R.: "And with that, Golem and Roberts start putting the boots to Matthews! Why is Nevada and Rabesque not helping!"
J.S.: "Because they're enjoying this as much as I am!! Kill him Golem, kill him!!"
V.A.: "Maybe they're trying to prove to Matthews that he DOES need their help, that he CAN'T fight these guys alone!"
T.R.: "Finally, Rabesque and Nevada run to the ring and Golem and Roberts spot them and clear out! Cowards!"
J.S.: "Cowards! No, they're just smart Ross! Golem and Roberts did what they had to do and there's no need for them to try and fight Laurel and Hardy here!"
T.R.: "Nevada and Rabesque yell over the ropes at Golem and Roberts as they depart ringside, and they both turn and look at the downed Matthews! He's hardly moving! Rabesque pulls Matthews to his feet and lets him sit against the turnbuckle, and Rabesque and Nevada exit the ring! Matthews just stares at them leave as he bleeds! These guys had better figure out if they are friends or foes and in a hurry!"
V.A.: "Matthews has always been an independent and solo wrestler, and Rabesque has always been in a group environment, so their personalities clash!"
J.S.: "As well as his wardrobe!"
T.R.: "Fans, we'll be back live from Washington D.C. after this break!"
(Fade to Commercial)
(The camera comes back from commercial and zooms in on Paul Kramer standing at mid-ring)
PAUL KRAMER: "Our next match is for the FWF Cable Television Title!! First, coming to the ring, the challenger," (CUE-UP: "Where Boys Fear To Tread" by the Smashing Pumpkins) "From New York City, weighing in at 235lbs., MINION!!"
(The MCI Center shakes from the boos as Minion walks to the ring with an evil, deranged look as he taunts the fans all the way to ringside. He climbs up on the apron and yells out some threats)
P.K.: "And his opponent," (CUE-UP: The lonely cry of a wolf followed by "Right Now" by Van Halen) "From the Black Mountains of Mew Mexico, weighing in at 223lbs., the FWF Cable TV Champion, STONE WOLF!!"
(The crowd explodes with cheers as Stone Wolf walks slowly to the ring, staring intently at Minion. SW raises his belt up high as he gets to the apron and the fans get even louder)
TONY ROSS: "Well, if Nevada and Rabesque want to know where Stone Wolf stands, they need to look no further because he is about to face one of their mortal enemies!"
VICTOR ALVAREZ: "The problem here is Stone Wolf is a loner, always has been and always will be! Rabesque and Nevada don't seem to understand that Stone Wolf escaped a beating at the Pay-Per-View because he had nothing at stake, he was just the referee!"
JAKE SHADES: "Oh stop making excuses! Stone Wolf is a yellow-bellied coward of a kemosabe! He got out of there while he could to save his own skin!"
T.R.: "And Minion goes right after Stone Wolf but the champion is ready! He blocks Minion's kicks and punches and fires back with his own! Left, left, Right and a big KO punch sends Minion to the mat! Minion begs off to the corner but Stone Wolf will have none of that! Stone Wolf goes right in with kicks to the stomach! Stone Wolf appears to be angry!"
J.S.: "Yeah, he's still pissed off that he wasn't cast in "Dances With Wolves", instead, he had to settle for "Dances With Men"!
T.R.: "Enough of your lame insults! Stone Wolf is battering Minion in the corner and Stu Fields wants him to get away from there! Fields argues with the champ as Minion gets to his feet and gets a cheap shot in from behind the referee! Stone Wolf doubles over and Minion with a snap DDT!"
V.A.: "Minion got some great torque on that move! He could have the win right here!"
T.R.: "He's not covering! He drops an elbow on Stone Wolf and parades around the ring, taunting the fans, who give them what he deserves, no respect! Minion was lucky to escape with a win over Michael Kerrigan at the Pay-Per-View, and now we'll see if he can get lucky here against Stone Wolf!"
J.S.: "It wasn't luck, Ross, Minion was toying with Kerrigan and would eventually have put him away with ease without that Massacre chair shot!"
T.R.: "What match were you watching!? Minion gets Stone Wolf to his feet and gets a kick in the stomach for the effort! Stone Wolf grabs him in a headlock but Minion quickly back suplexes out of it! Stone Wolf up quickly and gets leveled with a shoulderblock!"
V.A.: "Minion is pointing to his noggin believing how smart he is!"
T.R.: "And Stone Wolf rolls him up from behind!! 1....2....No!! Minion is up and arguing with Fields for some reason and Stone Wolf drills Minion with a dropkick and he flies right over the tope rope!"
V.A.: "This could get ugly!"
J.S.: "About as ugly as your wife!"
T.R.: "Knock it off! Stone Wolf follows him out and Minion is able to get a few kicks in and pushes Stone Wolf over the steel steps and he lands hard on his head! Minion collects himself and pulls the champion up by his hair and rams his head off the arpon! Minion climbs up on the apron and he hits a flying shoulderblock on Stone Wolf on the floor!! Wow!!"
J.S.: "This is it Minion, just get him in the ring and this is all over!"
T.R.: "Minion kicks Stone Wolf in the ribs a few times and rolls him back into the ring! He's going up top! Could this be the Fall From Grace!? Somersault Senton Splash...MISSED!! Stone Wolf just barely was able to roll out of there and Minion rolls all the way out of the ring!"
V.A.: "Nooo!! He had him!! He had him!!"
T.R.: "Stone Wolf gets up slowly and grabs Minion on the apron and suplexes him back in! He pulls Minion up and hits a swinging neckbreaker!! He follows it with a snap legdrop and he signals for the top rope!! He's going up top!!"
V.A.: "He's going to go for the Black Mountain Splash!!"
J.S.: "Nooo!! Get up Minion!! Get up!!"
T.R.: "He climbs up and sets himself and whoah!!! From out of nowhere, Abel Wicks, Golem, Ashe Draven, and Wayne Roberts have all hit ringside!! Wicks pushes Stone Wolf off the top rope and he lands awkwardly on the mat! Fields calls for the bell and this is going to be a DQ!"
V.A.: "Minion's allies saved him from certain defeat there!"
J.S.: "Bullcrap!! Minion would have easily rolled out of the way and finished Chief Small Balls off!! Go get em guys!! Ha ha!!"
T.R.: "It's five on one in there as Minion is up and helping kick the senses from Stone Wolf! Stu Fields just got dumped over the top rope! This is brutal! Ohh, look at this! Wicks and Golem hold each end of Stone Wolf so Minion can do his Fall From Grace! What big men these guys are!! This is sickening!"
V.A.: "And look at that!! Jean Rabesque and Nevada Smith have appeared at the locker room entrance again and they are watching all this!"
T.R.: "Why won't they help him!!? Forget about what he said, the man is getting ganged up on by five guys here! Rabesque and Nevada shake their heads and turn to go back behind the curtain as Minion and his allies get their last kicks in on an unconscious Stone Wolf!"
V.A.: "Look at Wicks, he just went to the timekeeper's table and he has the Cable TV Belt!"
(Wicks yells into the camera)
ABEL WICKS: "I think I'll take this belt too, the Wicker deserves to have all the gold in this poor excuse of a federation! All hail the Wicker, your savior of professional wrestling!"
(Wicks wraps the belt around his waist as Golem and Draven are behind him congratulating him)
T.R.: "Now Wicks thinks he's the Cable Champion?? Give me a break!"
V.A.: "He's stealing Stone Wolf's belt! Stone Wolf is unconscious in the ring as the garbage rains down upon Wicks and company!"
T.R.: "I hope you're happy, Shades, because this will not go unavenged!"
J.S.: "Oh too bad you're precious Stone Wolf won't be doing anything about it anytime soon! Ha ha ha!! The only good Injun is an unconscious Injun!! Ha ha ha ha!!"
T.R.: "I'm glad you are amused by all this! Fans, we need to take a break, and we will have the National Tag Team Title Match when we return!"
(Fade to Commercial as Stone Wolf begins to stir in the ring)
(The camera comes back from commercial with a slow pan of the MCI Center before cross-fading to Paul Kramer standing at mid-ring)
(The crowd reacts with mostly boos as Martinez and Justice walk to the ring with about 15 yards separating them, with Jewello next to Martinez. There is obviously tension between the two men.)
P.K.: "And their opponents," (CUE-UP: "Sabotage" by the Beastie Boys) "From Duluth, Minnesota, weighing in at 215lbs., "ICEMAN" KEVIN KEARNS!! His partner, from Raleigh, North Carolina, weighing in at 211lbs., DARREN MACMILLAN!! They are the FWF National Tag Team Champions, THE NEW BREED!! They are accompanied by Miss Thang!!"
(The New Breed gets a huge reaction, mostly cheers, with some audible boos, as they walk to the ring with worried looks on their faces. Miss Thang is not with them. As soon as they hit the ring, Kearns grabs the mic)
KEVIN KEARNS: "OK Weathers, I know you're pissed off because I didn't rat out my boy Black Sage, but you done played the wrong hand by taking Miss Thang Downtown! If you're still in this building, you had better get your bald ass out here right now with our woman!"
(Kearns throws the mic down and waits)
TONY ROSS: "Do you think Miss Thang was arrested by Assemblyman Weathers!?"
VICTOR ALVAREZ: "That could be a possibiltiy, Tony, she did attack him earlier tonight!"
JAKE SHADES: "God I hope they have her in cuffs!"
T.R.: "And Blood and Fire attacks! These guys look like they are having some problems, but they have no problem attacking the champions in unison! We are underway here with or without Miss Thang!"
J.S.: "At least Karen Jewello is out here! I like that gothic look she has going!"
T.R.: "Jake, you'll take anything with a heartbeat! Justice and Martinez both knock the New Breed right out of the ring! Both Macmillan and Kearns get right up and Blood and Fire have their back turns looking at the crowd and Karen Jewello for approval! Double dropkick from behind!! Justice and Martinez bounce off the ropes into double rollups!! 1....2....Ohh!! We almost had a double pin there! Justice is up and he clobbers Macmillan into the corner! Kearns and Martinez are trading shots!"
V.A.: "The New Breed are at a huge size disadvantage here because both men outweigh them by at least 50 pounds! Referee Willie Bennett is trying to restore order here!"
T.R.: "It's good to see Willie back after seeing him get zapped accidentally by JC at the last Pay-Per-View! Martinez dumps Kearns out of the ring and I think we will have Macmillan and Justice as the legal men! Justice is just a monster and he gorilla presses Macmillan and drops him face first on the turnbuckle!! Wow!!"
V.A.: "That's a good way to break someone's jaw!"
J.S.: "Good, because someone needs to keep those jaws of Macmillan from flapping! That guy is more annoying than you two clowns put together! Squash him Justice!"
T.R.: "Justice pulls Macmillan to his feet and hits a thunderous belly to back suplex! Justice looks out to the crowd maniacallly and absorbs some boos before pulling Macmillan up...OHH! Macmillan with a small pacakge!! 1....2....Ohh!! So close!!"
J.S.: "He had the tights!!"
T.R.: "No he didn't you blind fool! Justice is right back up and is mad as hell, but Macmillan is able to dropkick him! Justice doesn't go down! Macmillan off the ropes with a body press, but Justice catches him!! Ohhh!! What a thrust slam!!"
V.A.: "That knocked whatever wind Macmillan had right out of him!"
J.S.: "And it's hard to deflate a windbag like that!"
T.R.: "Justice goes over and tags Martinez in and he mounts the second turnbuckle and nails Macmillan with a forearm! A cover!! 1....2...no!! I just can't see the New Breed standing up to these monsters! Martinez pulls Macmillan up and hits a huge spinebuster!! 1....2...Kearns breaks it up!! Referee Willie Bennett forces Kearns back to the corner and Justice comes in and lays Macmillan out with a big boot as he was being held by Martinez! Martinez with a brainbuster!! 1....2....Kearns saves him again! Now Justice is in again!!"
J.S.: "And once again, Macmillan has to be saved and carried by his partner! What a loser!"
T.R.: "Justice and Kearns are going at it and we're losing control here! Blood and Fire is double teaming Kearns in the corner as Bennett is yelling at them to get back to their corners! Macmillan is up!! He dropkicks Justice and he smacks heads with Martinez!! Macmillan mounts the top turnbuckle!! Flying enziguiri kick!! Wow!! A pin!! Bennett runs over!! 1.....2.....No!!"
V.A.; "That outburst took a lot out of Macmillan and he lays out on the mat sucking wind!"
J.S.: "That's not all he sucks!"
T.R.: "Justice finally returns to his corner as Macmillan starts to make his way to Kearns! He's crawling slowly and Justice is yelling for Martinez to stop him! Macmillan with one final surge and he makes it!! In comes Kearns and he is riled up!! Rights, lefts, jabs and a big uppercut staggers Martinez! Kearns with a running clothesline sends the "Eradicator" down! Kearns charges and drills Justice in the corner and he falls off the apron!"
V.A.: "The fans are reacting to something...whoah wait a minute! Look over by the locker room entrance!!"
T.R.: "Joe Massacre has emerged, and look who is on the floor crawling in front of him!! It's Miss Thang and she looks a mess! Oh my God!! Look at her back!! Massacre looks like he dug cross marks into her skin! Her hair is a mess as well!"
J.S.: "But she still looks hot! Massacre looks like a lucky man, he had his way with her!"
V.A.: "So it looks like Assemblyman Weathers didn't arrest her after all!"
(Massacre can be audibly heard yelling, "Go on you little crack whore, go back to your owners!")
T.R.: "What a disgusting display this is, Massacre just keeps getting lower and lower! Massacre continues toward the ring!"
V.A.: "Look at this!! Michael Kerrigan just came out of nowhere and attacked Jared Justice who was on the floor!! What is going on here!?"
T.R.: "Vic, remember earlier in the week when Kerrigan said that Martinez owed him something?? Is Kerrigan here to collect!?"
V.A.: "Yes, I do remember that, I believe Martinez called it a boon! Right now, Kerrigan is taking Kerrigan's partner out! Apparently, this stems from some events in the defunct WAR promotion! But why is Kerrigan attacking Justice!?"
T.R.: "Massacre is now at ringside and Martinez and Kearns are both watching him! Bennett rolls out to try and get Kerrigan off of Justice! Now what!? Who is that!?"
V.A.: "It's Mack Muro!! Mack Muro has hit the ring from behind!"
T.R.: "We have mass chaos here! Muro has returned to wrestling and he superkicks Darren Macmillan off the apron!! He grabs Kearns from behind and hits a torture rack DVD!! The Big Bang Baby if I remember it correctly!!"
V.A.: "Muro has just taken out the New Breed and Martinez just stood there and watched it while his partner is being assaulted on the outside! I think Bennett saw Muro!"
T.R.: "Bennett is calling for the bell here! Massacre is in the ring now and he has a chair!! He's approaching Martinez! It looks like Massacre was not finished with him after his attack at Wrestlebowl I! Martinez backs away and wait!! Ohhh!! Massacre turns and lays out Darren Macmillan with the chair!! Now he's whacking the downed Kevin Kearns!! What is going on here!!?"
V.A.: "Has Massacre sided with Martinez here!? I thought they were mortal enemies after Wrestlebowl! Martinez doesn't know what to do!"
J.S.: "OK, now I'M confused, and if I'M confused, we know there is a big problem!"
T.R.: "Miss Thang, who has been seemingly brutalized by Massacre, is being held by Number One Fan who just came out! She is making Miss Thang watch this disgusting display! And it looks like that tall bald man we saw help Massacre earlier is out as well!"
V.A.: "And the New Breed has no one to help them, since Black Sage was arrested and they certainly can't rely on Jean Rabesque or his friends, after attacking him at the pay-per-view!"
T.R.: "Michael Kerrigan rolls into the ring and he is as confused as anybody here and he's staring at Martinez with a look of confusion on his face! Martinez is clueless as well! Massacre spots Kerrigan and throws the chair down, and now we have a staredown! Massacre and Kerrigan are eye to eye here!"
J.S.: "Why isn't he attacking Kerrigan!? Kerrigan cheap shotted him earlier in the show!"
T.R.: "It's called payback, Shades! Massacre did the same thing to him!"
J.S.: "Why are you kissing Kerrigan's ass after he put your ass down earlier in the show!?"
T.R.: "I didn't take it personal! Anyways, Massacre backs off from Kerrigan and he and Mack Muro, the bald guy, and Number One Fan all exit the ring laughing and congratulating each other, and the New Breed is left in a shambles!"
(Joe Massacre is heard yelling..."No one survives the NIGHTSHIFT!!")
T.R.: "I have been told that Willie Bennett is going to call this one a No Contest!"
V.A.: "I'm going to have to agree with him on that one, that match was way too out of control! It looks like Joe Massacre has assembled himself a group to side with him here in the FWF, and he has taken out the New Breed after battling their friend Black Sage earlier in the show!"
J.S.: "I'm still confused!"
T.R.: "Now Kerrigan and Martinez are arguing in the ring, and Justice is back up and he tackles Kerrigan from behind!! We got another fight!! Justice is all over him!! Martinez tries to pry them apart!"
V.A.: "And now Czar, Kraven and Flatliner are approaching the ring!!"
T.R.: "I don't believe this, what could they possibly want!? Czar grabs the Tag Team belts off the timekeeper's table as the New Breed lies lifeless in the ring! Czar, Kraven and Flatliner all climb into the ring as Justice, Kerrigan, and Martinez spills to the outside! Czar has a mic!"
CZAR: "Congrats guys! You get to hold onto these titles! But now it is time for a dose of reality! (Czar tosses the belts down to the fallen New Breed) Enjoy them while you can, cause the roosters have come home to roost and we are taking what we want! And we want these belts!"
(With that, Lord Dread and a phalanx of security approaches the ring. Dread stares icily at Czar, Kraven and Flatliner as security breaks up the brawl between Kerrigan and Justice. Czar, Kraven and Flatliner exit the ring, their stares never leaving the eyes of Lord Dread)
T.R.: "Fans, we have to take a break! We'll be right back live with the Battleground Main Event on Fox Sports America!"
(Fade to Commercial)
(The camera comes back from commercial as the ring is finally cleared. Many of the fans in the arena are still standing as the camera zooms in on Paul Kramer standing at mid-ring)
Paul Kramer: "Ladies and gentleman, are you ready for the MAIN EVENT!!??" (Crowd roars) "This is a Falls County Anywhere in the District of Columbia match!!" (crowd roars again) "The National and Frontier Titles will be on the line!! First, coming to the ring, the challengers," (CUE-UP: "Cemetary Gates" by Pantera) "From Miami, Florida, weighing in at 261lbs., WAYNE ROBERTS!! His partner, from Scottsdale, Arizona, weighing in at 235lbs., "IKON" ABEL WICKS!!"
(The crowd roars with boos as Roberts and Wicks make their way to the ring smiling and absorbing the boos with pride. Wicks is wearing Stone Wolf's Cable TV Title belt)
P.K.: "And their opponents," (CUE-UP: The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly" by Ennio Marricone. Not one, but TWO loud motorcycles are heard) "From Montreal, Quebec, weighing in at 245lbs., the FWF Frontier Heavyweight Champion, JEAN RABESQUE!! His partner, from Wherever the Hell He Wants to Hail From, weighing in at 265lbs., the FWF National Heavyweight Champion, NEVADA SMITH!!"
(The crowd nearly sends the roof of the MCI Center into orbit as not only Nevada Smith, but Jean Rabesque both ride in on twin Harley Fat Boys. Both men have their belts slung over their shoulders as the extremely loud bikes roar up to ringside. Both men dismount and put the kickstands down and raise their arms as the crowd continues to roar. Smith and Rabesque stand outside and confer as Wicks and Roberts are in the ring mocking them)
TONY ROSS: "What an entrance by the National and Frontier Champion!! It looks like Rabesque went out and got himself a Harley to match Nevada Smith's! This place is electric!"
JAKE SHADES: "Too bad the big dope can hardly ride the thing, did you see him grinding the gears on the way in!?"
T.R.: "Which is more than I can say for that six-tone Yugo you bomb around in, you're lucky that wreck even gets into gear!"
J.S.: "Hey, I prefer economic transportation, so sue me!"
T.R.: "Smith and Rabesque dive into the ring simultaneously and here we go!! Wicks and Roberts start stomping away at them as they get in! Rabesque and Smith are able to get to their feet and they meet Wicks and Roberts head on! Smith clobbers Roberts and sends him flying over the ropes! Rabesque rakes Wicks' eyes and he and Nevada double clothesline Wicks down!! Double fistdrop!! Listen to this crowd!!"
V.A.: "And Abel Wicks never got a chance to take Stone Wolf's Cable TV Title belt off!"
J.S.: "It looks much better on him anyway!"
T.R.: "Nevada goes out after Roberts and Rabesque stays in with Wicks and catches a low blow for his efforts!"
V.A.: "Remember, this is falls count anywhere in Washington, D.C.! We have two referees out there, Willie Bennett and Stu Fields, and they are just here to make a count!"
J.S.: "Something they are rarely capable of!"
T.R.: "At least they finished high school, Shades! Smith is absolutely demolishing Roberts on the outside and it looks like he has the look of the Devil in his eyes! He dumps Roberts over the railing and into the crowd! This is going to get out of hand early!"
V.A.: "Wicks is starting to do a number on Rabesque in the ring!"
T.R.: "Wicks whips Rabesque in and hits a beautiful tilt-o-whirl backbreaker! He struts around the ring as if to let the crowd savor what he just did! This Wicks is as arrogant as they come! His interviews are nothing but self-admiration!"
J.S.: "And it's all true!"
T.R.: "Nevada is running Roberts into anything nailed down out there, and this crowd had better be careful! Wicks dumps Rabesque out of the ring! Wicks stands on the apron and goes for a splash!! Nobody home!! Rabesque rolled out of the way and Wicks smacks the concrete!! He is in agony as Rabesque gets a breather!"
V.A.: "Nevada is absolutely relentless on Roberts! Roberts is already split open and bleeding profusely!"
T.R.: "Ohhh!! Nevada rams Robert's head right into the handlebars of his bike!! Let's hope he doesn't break anything on there with Roberts' worthless hide! Nevada slams Roberts down on the concrete! Wicks and Rabesque are both up! Rabesque goes for a clothesline and Wicks hits a nice single-leg takedown and Rabesque falls face first into the ring steps!! My God, flush on his chin!!"
J.S.: "He's gonna make Rabesque pay for stealing his Frontier belt!"
T.R.: "He didn't steal it, he won it fair and square!"
J.S.: "Yeah, after 800 guys interfered!"
T.R.: "All on Wicks' behalf, you numbskull! We've already seen Scott Malec burn Abel Wicks' fake World Title in effigy, and he wants to see Nevada and Rabesque slaughter Wicks in the worst way!"
V.A.: "As for Roberts, he never got a chance to do anything, Nevada is all over him!"
T.R.: "Rabesque is in trouble as Wicks pulls him up by the hair and he drags him up the aisle! This could be leaving the building at any minute! Wicks dumps him over the railing and now they're fighting up one of the stairways here at the MCI Center! This crowd needs to stay back!"
V.A.: "Nevada is unaware of where Rabesque and Wicks are, he's too busy beating the life from Roberts!!"
T.R.: "Wicks tries to pin Rabesque in one of the rows as the fans clear out! Security is there to hold the fans back! Fields counts!! 1....2...Rabesque with a shoulder up!! Wicks rams Rabesque's head off one of the metal seats and they continue up the stairs! This is pandemonium, I can't hear myself think in here!"
J.S.: "Wicks is gonna take Rabesque out like the trash he is and get his belt back!"
V.A.: "For now I guess he is content with Stone Wolf's Cable TV Title! He still hasn't taken it off!"
T.R.: "You know Stone Wolf is going to try and get that belt back, by hook or by crook! Wicks and Rabesque get to the mezzanine landing and start trading punches near some concession stands! They push through a curtain and emerge into one of the lobbies of the MCI Center! There you see all the concession stands and merchandise vendors!"
V.A.: "They better be protecting their products here!"
T.R.: "Rabesque just grabbed a full beer from one of the vendors and flung it in Wicks face!! Wicks is blinded!! Ohhh!!! Rabesque just rammed Wicks' head into a glass Washington Wizards team picture and the glass shatters everywhere! Damage is being done here! Our cameraman is doing what he can to follow the action here!"
V.A.: "Here is a split screen shot of the action at hand, and Nevada Smith looks like he is about to finish Wayne Roberts off!! He has him over by the stage where there is a 10 foot drop to the plywood covering the electric wires and fuse boxes!!"
(The screen switches back to single frame on Nevada and Roberts)
T.R.: "Dear Lord, what is he going to do!? Ohhhhh!!!!"
(The announcers go silent as Nevada Smith powerbombs Roberts off the stage and down to the plywood riser 10 feet below. Roberts crashes through the plywood to the electronic devices under it. Nevada stands triumphantly with his arms raised as the MCI Center goes ballistic and starts chanting "NEVADA!! NEVADA!! NEVADA!!)
T.R.: "Nothing will ever top this night in FWF history!! NOTHING!! We have seen it all and much more tonight guys!! We are not done yet!!"
V.A.: "Nevada is going down to make the academic pin on Roberts! Willie Bennett is right there!!"
T.R.: "1.....2....3!!! Nevada secures the win for his team!! Roberts is not moving!!"
J.S.: "That's OK, I'm sure Wicks is destroying Rabesque right now!!"
T.R.: "As the camera switches back to Wicks and Rabesque, they appear to be heading into the bathrooms!! Security is trying to get everybody away from this melee, and Wicks is bleeding from the glass he was thrown into!! They burst into the bathrooms and our cameraman follows them in!"
V.A.: "Stu Fields is trying to tell them that the match is over but they are not listening! Wait a minute!! Oh my!!! Golem, Ashe Draven, and Minion have all burst from the bathroom stalls!! This was all a setup!!"
(SPLIT-SCREEN: Nevada runs up the aisle to try and find Rabesque and Wicks)
J.S.: "KILL HIM!!!! KILL HIM!!!! YYEEAAAAHHHHH!!!"
T.R.: "Oh my Lord!! Rabesque is getting quadruple teamed in the bathroom of the MCI Center! The cameraman is in their as well and someone just locked the door with a chain and padlock! This does not look good for Rabesque at all!!"
J.S.: "Say goodbye to your hero!! We are witnessing the demise of the worst FWF Champion of all time! Ha ha ha ha!! Where's my cigar!!?"
T.R.: "This isn't over yet!! Somebody is trying to break the door down!! Is it Nevada!!? Listen to that noise, somebody is trying like hell to get in there!!"
(The camera turns to the door just as a man bursts through the bathroom door with a fire extinguisher from one of the nearby emergency stations in the MCI Center)
T.R.: "IT'S STONE WOLF!!! He has a fire extinguisher, and he is mad as hell!! He nails Draven with the extinguiser and throws Minion into one of the sinks!! He goes after Wicks!! He wants his belt back!! Golem gets taken out as well!!"
V.A.: "He rips the belt off of Wicks, but Draven, Golem and Minion are all carrying Rabesque's limp body out of the bathroom!! Our cameraman is trying to follow them!!"
T.R.: "Look at this!! The cameraman is running after Draven and Golem, who is running while carrying Rabesque!! Minion is looking out for more help for Rabesque!! Look at the fans in the lobby, they are in shock!! They quickly go down the escalator and charge out one of the doors leading outside of the MCI Center!! There is a van waiting out there!!"
V.A.: "Look who's driving it!! It's that man in the red and black Mephisto mask!! It must be Michael Manson!!"
T.R.: "We're not sure about that Vic! They dump Rabesque into the back of the van, and Golem yells at the camera man to get in too!"
(Golem is audibly heard yelling at the camera man, "Get in here, I want the world to see this!")
T.R.: "The van pulls away from the MCI Center with Jean Rabesque and the camerman in back!! It's dark in the back of the van and I can barely make out Draven, Golem and Minion all in the back!! What are they doing!? They're taping Rabesque's wrists and ankles together!! This is sickening, Rabesque has been kidnapped here!! Where are the police, where are those DC Metro cops that we're here earlier!!"
(The camerman points the camera out the back window and catches Nevada Smith on his Harley flying up the side ramp of the MCI Center and pulling up on the van's rearend quickly)
T.R.: "Can you believe this!!?? Nevada Smith is in hot pursuit!! This is incredible!! I am so glad that cameraman was able to get in there!! This is all being broadcast on the MCI Center scoreboard for all the fans to see!! A high speed chase through the streets of Washington, D.C!!"
(The van turns hard right onto a residential street and nearly clips several car rearview mirrors parked on the sides. The van makes another hard right into an alley. Nevada almost loses control of his bike on the first hard turn, giving Minion and company some time)
V.A.: "The van has stopped in front of a dumpster!"
(The cameraman is forced out of the back of the van as Golem and Draven pull Rabesque's unconscious body out as Minion opens the D.C. Sanitation Department dumpster and Rabesque gets tossed in. Nevada's Harley is heard roaring around the corner)
T.R.: "They just tossed Rabesque in that dumpster and now they're scurrying to get back in the van. like the rats they are!! The van takes off leaving the cameraman there as Nevada screeches to a halt!! The cameraman points to the dumpster as Nevada quickly gets off his bike! He opens the dumpster to find Rabesque inside!!"
J.S.: "Rabesque is right where he belongs, with the rest of the filth and scum of this City!!"
T.R.: "Some DC Metro squad cars pull up as Nevada is having a fit!! He is swearing up a storm as he tries to pull Rabesque out of there! several DC policemen assist him as he continues to curse! This is unbelievable!"
J.S.: "Rabesque and Nevada may have won the battle, but they didn't come close to winning the war!! Ha ha ha!! I love it!!"
T.R.: "Fans, we are desperately out of time here! We hoe you enjoyed this edition of Battleground and make sure you are here next week, because we will be making a major announcement about the next Pay-Per-View, FWF Total Conquest '99!! For Victor Alvarez and Jake Shades, this is Tony Ross saying so long from the Nation's Capital!!"
(The show ends as Rabesque is pulled out of the dumpster and assisted to one of the squad cars. Nevada Smith stands a ways down the alley, staring down where the van took off into the distance. The camera zooms in on his face, with an inferno of hatred burning in his eyes as the lights of the DC Metro squad cars swirl behind him and a lone alley light shines down....Fadeout)