Please allow me to introduce myself,

I’m a man of wealth and taste.

I’ve been around many a long year,

had many a man’s soul, and face.

I was around when Jupiter

Had her moment of suff’ring and pain.

Made damn sure that Hojo

watched his hands seal his fate.

Pleased to meet you, won’t you guess my name?

What be puzzling you is the nature of my game...

Stuck around Mideel

When I thougt it was time for a change.

Saved the boys and the planet,

Mesdoram screamed in pain.

rode a choc’bo for all you know,

when the Weapons grow’d,

and the whole world snow’d,

Pleased to meet you, won’t you guess my name?

What be puzzling you is the nature of my game...

I fought with glee when Seph ‘n me

stopped Hojo’s and all the horrors he’d free.

I shouted out "Who Killed Kenny?"

when after all it was you, not me... (Kyle to the audience: You bastards!)

Let me please introduce myself,

I’m a man of wealth and taste,

and I lay traps for materia thieves,

who get stopped before they leave their teens.

Pleased to meet you, won’t you guess my name?

What be puzzling you is the nature of my game...

Just as ev’ry cop is disgruntled,

and all the sinners saints,

as heads is tails,

Just call me Gatoris,

for I need some restraints.

So if you meet me have some courtesy,

have some dignity, have some taste.

Use all your well-thought apologies,

Or I’ll kick your @$$ to waste!

Pleased to meet ya,

Hope you got my name.

But what be puzzling you,

Is the nature of this game.

(Music cuts off abruptly)

(Spoken by Gatoris) ... Well, I’d like to know too...

(Music continues)