Disclaimer:  Fox Mulder, Dana Scully, the X-Files, and associated
characters are property of David Duchovny, Gillian Anderson, Chris Carter,
Ten-Thirteen Productions and Fox Broadcasting Corporation.  They are used
without permission and no copyright infringement is meant.

George Harrison wrote this song, the Beatles performed it.  I merely
borrow.

Any elements not recognized as being taken from the show copyright
Christina Shuy. 

Comments and other things sent to cshuy@netcom.com are much appreciated. 

Rating:  G, MSR (faintly), no spoilers
Summary: Mulder gets a letter... from the IRS.

Note:  WIth all that has been going on in the news about IRS abuses, I
figured maybe I should put Mulder under that... see how he'd deal...

The Beatles Files:  "Taxman"
by Christina Shuy
cshuy@netcom.com

     Special Agent Fox Mulder was in a morose mood.  There was a thin
letter sitting on his desk.  It was from the IRS.  He'd been looking at it
for a solid ten minutes now.  At the moment, he also had a song stuck in
his head...  Even though the song was more than appropriate, he still
wished the song would shut off and go away.

  "Let me tell you how it will be
   There's one for you, nineteen for me
   'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman

   Should five per cent appear too small
   Be thankful I don't take it all
   'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah I'm the taxman"

     "Mulder, what's wrong?  That's the fifteenth time you've sighed in
the last 5 minutes." Dana Scully, his partner, asked, breaking through his
thoughts.
     "I'm being audited." he sighed again.
     "What?"
     "I just got a letter from the IRS.  Apparently, they have noted some
'irregularities' in my recent tax forms."
     "Did they say what sorts of irregularities?"
     "No... but that's what they want to talk to me about... more than
likely, they're going to make Skinner look like a saint." he pouted.

  "If you drive a car, I'll tax the street,
   If you try to sit, I'll tax your seat.
   If you get too cold I'll tax the heat,
   If you take a walk, I'll tax your feet.

   Don't ask me what I want it for
   If you don't want to pay some more
   'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman"

     "Come on, Mulder, we'll get through this together..." Scully said. He
     looked up at her and smiled faintly.  The atmosphere in the 
office seemed to have lightened considerably since they'd finally 
admitted what they'd felt for years... well, at least since they'd first
met after she'd been assigned to be his partner.  The attraction had been
almost instantaneous.  Trust had come later.
     "Together?  But this is my problem, not yours."
     "Fox William Mulder, I am offering my help.  Besides, I have a 
friend who owes me a favour and she happens to be a Certified Public
Accountant."
     "I'm definitely going to need one of those..." 
     "Ask and ye shall recieve."
     "Thanks, Dana..." he smiled.
     "For what?" she asked, returning the smile.

  "Now my advice for those who die
   Declare the pennies on your eyes
   'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman
   And you're working for no one but me."

     "For reminding me how much you mean to me, and for giving me a swift
kick in the pants out of my selfpity."
     She laughed.  "You're welcome, Mulder.  Come on... let's get 
something to eat.  I know you have a case to discuss and I don't want to
do it on an empty stomach."

-The End...-


"The Truth is Out There.  Trust No One."- from "The X-Files"
Pursuing a BS degree(Electrical Engineering)-EE 332(Systems Analysis)-Su97
"In the moment that you think you can't, you'll discover that you can." -
Celine Dion - "Power of the Dream" "Let's get Dangerous!" - Darkwing Duck.
Looking for work and a place to live... somewhere in the SanFran Bay Area.