Mulder Is Evil

The following is a translation of an ancient text, one of the so called "Dead Sea Scrolls". This translation goes into detail, even mentioning Mulder by name.


And it shall come to pass
that in the third millenium
The EVIL known as MULDER
shall walk the earth
And all shall quake in fear
of this ultimate evil

But the living MULDER shall
Not be the geatest evil
For after his death he
shall be reborn into a new
television season as the
ANTI-MULDER

And he shall rule the earth
with the help of his evil
acolytes, the brothers of
HANSON, and all will be as
a nightmare

And other creatures shall follow
the EVIL that is MULDER
And they shall be named dingoes,
squirrels, centipedes, koala bears,
centipedes, gila monsters, llamas,
ostriches, squid, capuchin monkeys,
spiders, katydids, Fox network
executives and Leonardo di Caprio
And although not powerful, they
shalt be evil nonetheless
For they are followers of MULDER

And there will yet be hope
For a knight of goodness shall
appear, and he shall be named
Chris "Mulder Killer" Cart.....

Unfortunatly, the text ends here, as the scroll was stolen from it's vault and has not been seen since. If recovered, it could hold the key to removing Mulder's evil influence from the earth.

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