chess badasses volume two: Sam Sloan
we interview the man by eMail!
Sam Sloan is a real chess badass, check out his web site, which features links to Japanese porn sites, comments on various political issues, a guide to the massively complex Japanese chess variant Shogi and a plea on behalf of Bobby Fischer. We advise the non-playing reader to check out the issue one article Chess: A game for badass intellectuals for background before reading this.
Dear Mr Sloan,
Thanks for granting us this interview, we'd just like to say that funky mf wholeheartedly supports your bid to be on the Executive Board of the United States Chess Federation, as you're clearly the man to bring to keep chess up with new technology. I personally feel that chess will keep going at least till mankind dies out, but it does need its profile raising. OK, on to the questions.
Q:Why have the US government been so harsh on Bobby Fischer: is it just a result of his contemptuous attitude to them or is there really a conspiracy?
Fischer is a high profile person. The criminal indictment against him was for the purpose of making a political point. They probably did not realize that he would become a fugitive and that this would become an international issue years later.
The indictment was wrong and illegal as Fischer had committed no crime. I believe that the top government officials, right up to President George Bush, should be arrested and prosecuted for this illegal act.
Q:Where is he now anyway, and what's he doing?
He is in Budapest at a secret location which I am not at liberty to reveal.
Q:What do you think about Bobby Fischer Random Chess?
Fischer advocates this because it puts all players on an even footing and where memorizing volumes of book openings does not matter.
Q:Do you think Kasparov would beat Bobby Fischer today? Or at his prime?
At chess, Kasparov would win today. At Fischer Random Chess it would probably be an even match.
Q:Tell us a bit about Shogi: do you prefer it to Chess?
Shogi is more complicated and difficult than chess. The problem is it is difficult to find an opponent at shogi in the US.
Q:How can Chess and Shogi playing help our understanding of the world?
It doesn't.
Q:There's a lot of good hip hop, drum and bass and big beat coming out of Japan at the moment, do you feel that Japan is where it's at right now?
Japan is having a sex revolution now like America had in the 1960s. Japan is a good place to be right now if you want to enjoy the benefits of this.
Q:Do you listen to music much? If so, what genres?
No. Except on my own web site.
Q:How do you feel about US cultural domination of the world?
I do not feel that the US culturally dominates the world. In the first place, I do not believe that the US has any culture at all.
Q:And about their foreign policy? (And the UK's submissive acceptance of it)
This is a political issue in the UK. I can remember under labor governments of the past when the UK was rather hostile to the US.
Why is Portugal the strongest ally the US has in Europe? (Few Americans realize that this is true).
Q:How do you feel about Deep Blue beating Kasparov? Do you know they used to say that when a computer could beat a human they would have found artificial intelligence? What about a tournament between different chess programs?
Deep Blue did not have any intelligence at all. It was just a calculating machnine. I believe that in a fair match conducted under tournament rules, Kasparov would have won easily.
Q:Who have we left out of our badass chess players list, other than you?
I would say that Tom Dorsch has become a badass but he would not likely cooperate with you.
Q:Why do you think we don't have any badass chess players here in the UK: I mean Nigel Short is a nerd.
You have one girl chess grandmaster in the UK who has had sexual intercourse with every male grandmaster in the UK, including Short. This is not a bad thing, but I wish you would send her over here.
Q:Can you reccomend some good chess books, to improve my game?
There are too many chess books to recommend one.
These are the slightly rude questions, that you're not obliged to answer:
Q:What are your preferred drugs: legal or illegal?
I do not take any drugs at all, not even asprin.
Q:What is the strangest place you've ever had sex?
In the lobby of an office building at night in Rangoon, Burma where it was extremely illegal. That was the only safe place for the girl.
Sam Sloan, we salute you, I'm just off to Japan to learn Shogi, listen to drum and bass and involve myself in the sexual revolution,
Tobias Flinch
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