A doctor comes out, flanked by Drucilla and Pandora....

Doctor: Well, Mr. Fiendish, I ran all the tests you asked for....

And?

Doctor: They're clean as the Board of Health... Hell one of them still has her hymen...

Pandora: I do NOT! Oops!

There's a joke there, somewhere... Heh. So these allegations made by their former employer are baseless...?

Doctor: Mr. Fiendish, I ran every test under the sun... There's nothing wrong with either of these young ladies that a few days in the sun won't cure....

Girls: No! Not THAT! We'll disintegrate!

Doctor: ......Okay, maybe they failed ONE test, but I'll sign the referral so they can see a therapist...

Excellent. What do I owe you?

Doctor: For the guy that wrote 'Better Living Through Violence'? No charge.

Why, thank you...

Doctor: No, thank YOU... Ever since people have been doing those little things you wrote about unto each other, business has been BRISK... Planning a sequel? I've been thinking about buying a beach house....

Heh. We'll see... Come, ladies...

Girls: (sighing dreamily) Yes, Mr. Fiendish...

Bobo wheels on them angrily.

NO. NOT allowed. Improper. Savvy?

Girls: B-But...

NEVER. Do I look like Clarence Thomas? ForGET it!

Girls: Awww....

So, now that I had to follow your car back to the warehouse, what's up, Bobo?

Nothing much... Just had to make sure that I didn't hire damaged goods...

What difference does it make if you did? I mean, you yelled at me for just SUGGESTING you could use them for-

QUIET! Family show, remember?!

Why so touchy?

I am NOT touchy. NEVER touchy. Not ALLOWED touchy. Comprendez?

Well, you only hired them for a week... After that, I guess since they'd technica- (GLCK!)

Just STOP, alright? See those girls?

KK nods, his face showing traces of red in Bobo's stranglehold...

NOT allowed. You may breathe now...

GASP! Holy shyte are you tense! Why? CDC jitters?

Are you retarded? Our first match is against the S-H-Boys... Shush the Mime; She-Malien; and Sheepshagger. Hell, even Snowbunny could beat that gaggle of cretins without working up a sweat...

What about Gary?

He works up a sweat breathing, but I digress...

So, what's wrong?

THEM!

Bobo points at the girls dramatically. They look up, and we can see giant black valentines floating above them. They charge Bobo squealing happily, but when they get to the Oriental Rug in the living room they fall right through the floor...

Cool! A trapdoor in your living room.... Must be a riot when the vacuum-cleaner salesmen get here...

Yes, I'm sure... But these girls won't take no for an answer... I haven't slept a wink since I hired them... Even that cartoon coyote would have given up by now, but not THEM... They think the 'safety measures' are TESTS for them to prove their devotion, and the phalanx continues...

Gee, we should ALL have such 'problems'....

Was that sarcasm?

Dude, you're looking at the wrong guy for pity... I haven't had a date in six years, and YOU got two nubile little minxes CHASING you... Poor little YOU. If it didn't mean my life would be forfeit, I'd spit on your shoes!

My, my, my... Spoken like a man with his MILK CARTON picture picked out... However, I have a sinister plan...

Fine. You gonna cut a promo or what?

NOW who's tense?

(grumble grumble) Three, two, one....

Hello, my intended...

It seems that the WINNING team starts with 'C'.... This pleases me. Sure, you could say that Virago, Veggie-Boy, and the human Pokemon actually have a chance... It'd be a LIE, of course, but you could SAY it... Heh. MY team will work these sad sacks over until there's nothing left but a GREASY SPOT, and Gary will probably soak that up with a BISCUIT.

Face facts, fans... No team has it as totally in the chips as Team C... Hell, 'C' stands for chips...

I thought C was for Cookie...

..........That's good enough for me. I hearby dub Team C the TOUGH COOKIES. You wanna be IG Champ? Tough cookies! You wanna be able to leave the arena under your own power? Tough cookies! You wanna get in the ring with the likes of the Third Deadly Sin and the Angel of Death MOST... EXALTED? You know what's going to HAPPEN to you?

Tough cookies?

No, clearly not. The fans get to see how the Cookies -REALLY- CRUMBLE. First, we'll crumble the S-H Boys, and then any OTHER team foolish, or UNLUCKY enough to face us thereafter!

What about Neige?

Who?

The OTHER member of your team....

The guy that's fired after the PPV?

Not if he apologizes to DK...

.....The guy that's fired after the PPV?

Point taken.

I'm so glad. Here, put this on...

Your trenchcoat? Why?

It's a surprise... Now the Crowley Hat that I saved from... another event.

They still won't let you talk about other feds, eh?

Something about the Fifth Amendment overruling the First, according to the lawyers... But I digress...

We have lawyers?

No, but -I- do.... Now set your Kamera on this tripod I coincidentally happen to have handy....

Sure, why not... You're not going to hurt me, are you?

Of course not... Why would I?

You're starting to worry me more than usual... What are you up to?

Nothing.

You swear?

.......No.

Bobo grabs the Kamera Kid and lifts him in a Gorilla Press.

I can no longer evade you... Your trials and travails have moved even MY withered soul... Let us share the darkness, and be three as one!

You're NOT!

Oh YES, 'I' am...

Girls: Yippee!

Bobo flings Kamera Kid into the hole...The sounds of clothes being frenetically torn asunder are prevalent.

Well, that should buy me at least ten minutes of sleep... Ah.... (yawn)

You're welcome... See you SOON.