hmmm tell me what you think about these jokes :))
Actual dialog of a former Wordperfect Customer Support employee::
Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?
Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.
What sort of trouble?
Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.
Went away?
They disappeared.
Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?
Nothing.
Nothing?
It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.
Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?
How do I tell?
Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?
What's a sea-prompt?
Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?
There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.
Does your monitor have a power indicator?
What's a monitor?
It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?
I don't know.
Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power
cord goes into it. Can you see that?
......Yes, I think so.
Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
......Yes, it is.
When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?
No.
Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.
......Okay, here it is.
Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.
I can't reach.
Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?
No.
Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?
Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.
Dark?
Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
Well, turn on the office light then.
I can't.
No? Why not?
Because there's a power outage.
A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff
your computer came in?
Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.
Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.
Really? Is it that bad?
Yes, I'm afraid it is.
Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?
Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer.
A girl takes her new boy friend back home after a dance party. She tells him to be very very quiet as her parents are asleep upstairs and if theywake up, she would be in big trouble as she's not allowed to bring boys home.
They settle down to business on the sofa, but after a while, he stops and says, " Where's the toilet ?, I need to go "She says, " It's next to my parents' bedroom. You can not go there, you
might wake them up.
Use the sink in the kitchen instead." He goes into the kitchen then, after a short while, he pops his head round the door and says to his girlfriend, " Have you got any paper ? "
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Two dwarfs have just won the lottery, so they go out and hire two prostitutes and two hotel rooms.
The first dwarf tries desperately all nite to have an erection, but all he can hear from the next room is " One, two, three huuh !! " and this continue and goes on all nite.
The next morning, the second dwarf asks, " So how did it go ?"
The first dwarf replies, " Shit, I couldn't get an erection. How was your nite ?"
The second dwarf turns and replies, " Even worst, I couldn't even get on the bed!"
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A man received a call from his local surgery telling him there's been a trrible mix up with his wife's medical test.
" We mixedup the test results and we don't know if she 's the one with herpes or a heart condition" apologises the doctor.
" Oh my God, what can I do ?" ask the man.
"Well, " suggests the doctor, " Send her out jogging, and if she comes back, don't make love with her !"
Bus Pledge .....
"We, the passengers of MRT/Buses, poised ourselves as one kan cheong people,
To those Mahjong die hards... We, the members of mahjong society pledge ourselves on one
regardless of old folks, kids or pregnant women, to rush for unoccupied seats,
based on pushing and shoving so as to achieve rest, slumber and sleep for our comfort".
mahjong table regardless of races, languages or religion, to build a 'da shang yuan',
base on 'ang tiong','bei bang', and 'green huat' so as to achieve 'zi mo', 'wu tai' and collect $
for our future.