Bravo- August 1999
THE WHOLE TRUTH ABOUT OUR LOVE
by Inge Czygan
For the first time since their spectacular coming out Eloy de Jong and Stephen Gately speak together about homosexuality, girls, their parents - and their strong feelings for each other...
Bravo:
On Wednesday 16th June, there was a complete surprise when you outed your relationship with each other. Why did you reveal it now?
Steve:
A friend from a Press Agency called us and warned us that somebody was trying to sell the story to a newspaper. We decided that we'd rather beat somebody to it.
Eloy:
We didn't want the truth to come out through somebody other than us. Therefore, we discussed it for a long time and then took the step of making the right decision in our lives! In the evening before the bombshell, we were very nervous. We were in Italy, where I was on the Boyzone Tour, and the news came on the TV. But we both felt that we must take the risk. We must finally end all the secrecy because Steve and I love each other and we are certain that we will stay together!
Bravo:
Why has your homosexuality been kept a secret for years and deceived your fans?
Steve:
I've told you that it was a very difficult decision to make. But when you're young and you would like to be famous in a band, straight-away you don't just say "oh, by the way- I'm gay". We all have fears that our secrets and our private lives will be exposed to the public.
Eloy:
Since we've realised that our fans love us for our music and personality more than anything else, it has been an enormous weight off both of our minds.
Bravo:
How long have you been in a strong relationship together?
Eloy:
8 Months. Last year, at the end of October, I presented a show in Cologne where Stephen was appearing with Boyzone. We had already got to know each other 4 years ago at a party in London, where we became good friends and had frequent private telephone calls with each other. Anyway, during this evening, we became aware of our deep feelings for each other.
Steve:
We now know that we have a big love for each other and that no day passes without one of us bringing the other one along wherever we are. Eloy and I have many things in common: We are both Pisceans, are absolute fans of Walt Disney, like listening to music from Mariah Carey- and we'll be together through thick and thin.
Bravo:
Eloy, your late father was very conservative. How did he and your remaining family react when you told them you were gay?
Eloy:
I was 17 when I first told my sister, Lucienne, the truth. In the evening, I went to my mother and said: "I must talk to you. What do you think: do you believe that I like girls or boys?" She answered: "I believe you love boys". She fully understood the situation. However, during the whole year, she tried to get my father to open up. He went mad and from that moment on, he would have nothing more to do with me. For the whole year long, he didn't speak a word to me. He despised me and gave me feelings that everything I touched was dirty afterwards. It was the worst year of my life!
Bravo:
For months, your father was very ill before he died. Had he tried to talk to you in view of the death?
Eloy:
No idea. Unfortunately, the relationship between me and my father wasn't good. When I became famous with Caught in the Act, he wasn't sure what to do when he found out about my liking for boys but, in reality, I couldn't be something I'm not. He always said time and time again: "The pretty girls are crazy for you. I don't understand that you don't want to have sex with them." Today, I wish that he could have seen how happy I am with Stephen. . .
Bravo:
Earlier, was there a time when you did sleep with girls?
Eloy:
Yes, once. But, although we were ready, I already knew I was gay.
Steve:
For me, it goes just the same. At first, I got together with girls, but my feelings for boys were too strong.
Bravo:
Is it possible that one day you may love girls again?
Steve:
No. These questions aren't likely for we have both found love with each other and want to spend our whole lives together. For ever!
Eloy:
That's right. Nothing can separate us!
Bravo:
Have you already got to know each other's families?
Eloy:
Yes, for months already. Steve spent Christmas with us in Holland. For my mother, he is like a second son. When she saw him for the first time, she knew that he is the man to make me happy.
Steve:
Eloy's Family visited me at Easter in my new house in Dublin.
Bravo:
Where would you prefer to live- in Ireland or Holland?
Steve:
That, we still don't know. It is certain that we have to run a household together- just like every other couple. Eloy likes cooking, I love doing the cleaning. (Laughs).
Bravo:
Ireland is a strong Catholic Place. Have you had any fears that offensive and vulgar words will be spoken to you?
Steve:
No, the reaction from the people was positive without exception. I, myself, am Catholic, but not a strong, devout Catholic and I believe that we should treat other people the way we expect to be treated.
Bravo:
Would you consider working together musically as well?
Eloy:
Naturally, we will help each other with our solo projects, but a duet isn't planned. I was on the whole Boyzone Tour close to the stage every evening and was totally proud of Stephen. He has dedicated the song 'Where did you go?' to me. I am still spending time searching for a record deal and a TV Show that I can present. I miss my fans very much, but it is a super feeling to know that they want me to keep on doing this and that their loyalty never stops.
When did you begin to notice that you were gay?
Eloy:
"I'd already suspected when I was 9 years old that I might be gay. Because I was so young, I still believed that my sexual feelings would change. Then, it wasn't simple to feel that way towards a member of the same sex at that age. Now, in this day and age, your homosexuality really can be accepted. Before, I was certain that I loved boys. Often, my schoolmates teased me and called me "queer". They felt that I somehow differed from their way of life. . ."
Stephen:
"I'd been thinking for some time that I felt more physically attracted to boys than girls. I didn't know whether I liked girls and that way of life, after all, I simply felt differently about boys. However, I kept these feelings secret for the moment. When I was 15, I told my sister, Michelle, the truth first. She is my best friend and has always supported me. Also, in school I had it easier than Eloy. I always had many mates who were very open-minded back in my school time. . ."
STARS CONGRATULATE BOTH ON THEIR 'OUTING':
After the story appeared in 'The Sun', Eloy and Stephen have been given a wave of sympathy: Elton John sent a stylish bouquet of flowers, George Michael reportedly made a spontaneous phonecall and many stars worldwide spoke of their admiration over their courageous step.
Spice Girls- They stand with full girlpower behind Eloy and Stephen.
Bastiaan Ragas (Ex- Caught in the Act)- He called Eloy at once and wished him luck.
George Michael- George Michael congratulated both by telephone.
Backstreet Boys-
They find the decision courageous.
BSB hope that they are supported by the public.
Courtney Love-
Step into the new millennium. Courtney praised their honesty.