If Only You Were Mine. . .

This is the 6th chapter in a Stephen and Eloy fanfic I wrote about a year ago (2000) about the beginning of the relationship. As I, and nobody else, knows the 'real' truth about how they first got together, I thought you might like to read this completely fictional piece of work which I would like to think is how they got together. In some instances, real events are portrayed.

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Stephen lay on the floor, feeling somewhat dazed. "Stephen? Stephen- are you alright?" Stephen could hear voices of concern around him. Carefully opening his eyes, he squinted at the ceiling. "Ouch, my head" he moaned.

Ronan stared up at the moving lift. "Jesus. . ." he exclaimed. "It's a wonder you haven't broken your back." he continued, as Stephen cautiously sat up. It was the first day of their UK tour and, after recording a TV show in the morning, had been doing last minute rehearsals. Which was when the accident had happened. Stephen had been standing on a moving lift, which the band come down on during the show, lost his balance and had toppled all the way down to the ground below. Stephen still looked a bit shaken as he was checked over by a doctor.

"Well, you're a little bit concussed, and a bit bruised, which is really why I would advise against going on stage tonight, or any other night for the next 2 weeks," the doctor was explaining. Stephen looked absolutely horrified at the thought. Out of the corner of his eye, Ronan could see Louis and Mark Plunkett, their tour manager, throwing a fit. If Stephen wasn't able to perform, it would mean that the tour would have to be cancelled.

Wearily, Stephen told the doctor, "Look, I'm fine. I can't let the fans down. I'm gonna do it." There was a look of relief across everyone's faces except the doctor's, who was still looking very doubtful.

"Well, I don't know. . . " he paused as he saw the pleading look on Stephen's face. "Well, okay. But the minute you begin to feel ill, you stop, okay?" Stephen nodded, as the doctor turned away. Turning to Ronan, he said, "You look after him, okay?" Ronan nodded, before helping Stephen up.

"You sure you're okay Steve?"

"Yeah, fine," Stephen replied, his voice still shaky from the fall. "I just can't wait to get out there!"

Dusting himself down, Stephen clambered back onto the stage, preparing to practise the 2 solo songs he would be performing during the tour. The rest of the band climbed into the seats below the stage ready to watch. The dancers gathered around Stephen, ready for the first song Games Of Love. Stephen belted out the song note perfect, and danced the dance step perfect too.

"That love, just a crazy feeling, Deep and hidden meaning, it's true. And love, takes some understanding, so don't you go and break all the rules. . ." Stephen's voice trailed off and he could feel himself going red. Eloy had just walked in quietly at the back. Stephen didn't know how long he'd been standing there, but he certainly felt self conscious dancing and singing in front of him. Everyone was looking questionably at Stephen. "Hey," he bellowed, his voice echoing around the Arena.

"Hey," Eloy grinned, before sitting down next to Mikey.

Stephen cleared his throat, before launching into his second solo song Where Did You Go. Again, he sang the song note and word perfect. Ronan smirked, feeling as if Stephen was showing off a bit for Eloy's benefit.

"Where did you go, we made a promise to be open now the secrecy," Stephen sang, looking pointedly at Eloy. "Where did you go, you drive me crazy, can't imagine how it's hurting me," Stephen, again looked over at Eloy, catching his eye as he sang the words. "Where did you go, although you're here with me it seems we've lost that chemistry, and I can't be in love on my own. . ." Stephen and Eloy were now staring straight into each other's eyes, oblivious to everyone else around them. Ronan cleared his throat, unwilling to interrupt the moment. "Um. . . Steve? That was great, but Mikey needs to rehearse his solo now." Stephen shook his head, breaking himself from Eloy's trance.

"Okay. What's the time? 5pm? The fans will be allowed in soon and so I'm going back to the hotel for a quick shower. Gotta make meself look decent!" Hugging each of the lads goodbye, Stephen headed out of the backstage door with Eloy and waited in the car for Barrie, who had become his driver whilst doing promotion over the last few months.

As soon as Barrie arrived, they were off, with Stephen waving to the persistent fans waiting outside. Eloy attempted to keep his head down. Whilst on the road, Eloy realised it had started. He already felt like he had to keep his relationship with Stephen a secret, even though there was nothing going on! Eloy sighed, looking out of the window. He had a very bad feeling about this. . .

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Eloy sat on Stephen's bed, patiently waiting for him to finish getting showered. Picking up a piece of paper, he began to look over the song list for tonight's show. Eloy smiled as he reached the Grease Medley, picturing Stephen as John Travolta. Laughing, he put the piece of paper down.

"What's so funny?" Stephen asked, coming out of the bathroom drying his hair with a towel.

"Oh, nothing. Just imagining you in your Grease-style leathers." Eloy grinned as Stephen went a deep shade of red.

Changing the subject, Stephen said, "I'll just go into the bathroom and get changed."

"You don't have to, you know Steve. I've seen it all before. . ." Stephen went even redder as he disappeared in the bathroom, reappearing a few moments later, wearing his new designer clothes. Sitting down beside Eloy, there was an awkward silence.

"So. . . " Stephen said.

"So. . ." Eloy replied. "Um. . ." Looking at Stephen's face, he noticed some cuts and bruises. Lightly touching the cuts with his finger, he said, "Steve? What happened? You're bruised!"

"Oh it's nothing. I just fell from one of the props used during the tour earlier on today."

"Not that moving lift?" Eloy gasped. "Stephen, you shouldn't be performing tonight. You need to take it easy!"

"I'm fine. I can't let the fans down." Eloy smiled. That was Stephen down to a tee. Never thinking about himself, always concerned for the fans.

"Look," Stephen sighed. "I have something to say to you. I know we're both feeling a little confused right now, but I haven't been able to stop thinking about last month. I just need you to know that I've fallen in love with you. It took that night to make me realise it, but I've always been in love with you. From the very first day I ever saw you."

"I kno. . ."

"Ssh," Stephen said, placing a finger at Eloy's lips. "Let me finish. You probably don't remember, but we met before that party in London 3 years ago. It was 94. We were on our first ever promotional trip to Germany. You were coming out of Bravo TV, as we were going in. I saw you and just thought, 'Wow.' It was love at first sight. I thought it was just lust, but now I know it was love." Stephen grinned sheepishly at Eloy. Eloy was smiling.

"I remember," Eloy began, noticing the surprised look on Stephen's face. "You were wearing a white t-shirt and blue jeans. And sunglasses too, even though it was winter and you were coming indoors!" Both Stephen and Eloy chuckled at the thought. "Anyway, I noticed you too. In Boyzone, people would normally notice Ronan because of his blond hair, or Shane because he's so unusual looking. But I noticed you. I thought you were cute. Real cute. But you looked so young! You must have been about 17 at the time, but I thought you were about 12! Way too young for me. And then when we did eventually meet properly and I realised how old you were, it was too late because we became really good friends. Although I was in a relationship with Carlo at the time, it didn't stop me thinking about being with you." There was an awkward pause as neither Stephen nor Eloy knew what to say next. After what seemed like hours, Eloy eventually spoke.

"I think we are both aware of our strong feelings for each other and I think we both know that if we were to get involved in a relationship with each other, it would have to be kept a secret. But, I don't think that now is the right time for it. I've still got a few loose ends to tie up with the band. We release our last single in November and then we have a press conference to do, as well as TV shows before that. I really think it would be far too risky at the moment, especially as there is a lot of press attention on Caught In The Act now. I respect and care about you far too much to let it all go wrong." Stephen nodded in agreement, as Eloy carried on speaking. "Let's just get next month over with and then we can see how it goes from there, okay?"

Stephen nodded, knowing that he would just have to be patient. "Okay E. I understand. And you're right- as usual! Did I tell you that we'll be playing at Popcorn Live after all?" Eloy shook his head. "Yeah, Ronan managed to make Louis change his mind. . . so I guess it IS sensible that we remain friends at the moment. I doubt very much whether we'd be able to hide our relationship if we were appearing on the same show!" Stephen smiled wryly. They stared at each other for a few moments, being interrupted by the beeping of a car outiside. Glancing out the window, Stephen saw it was Barrie, come to take them back to the Arena.

"We better go. Barrie's here." Stephen said, turning to Eloy. Just before leaving, Stephen pulled on Eloy's shoulder. "E? Promise me something. . . never leave me."

Eloy held Stephen in his arms for a moment, speaking softly, not wanting to ruin the moment. "I'll never leave you Stephen. I'll never let you go."

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