A long time ago, there was an evil wizard who once tried to destroy the Earth. Here is how the story began. There existed, in this time, a group of Wizards, which derived their Power and Magic from Power Crystals, found all over the Planet. One of these Wizards eventually became Evil, though he had good intentions at first. He had been steadily gathering all the Power Crystals scattered across the Planet for many years. His enemies, the other Wizards, were also gathering Power Crystals, but the Evil One had the most, and always grabbed them up when they were found. Once he had them all, he could cast the Spell of Mastery and banish all other wizards out of existence! This was not his plan yet, though. He had not become Evil yet.
After many years of collecting the Crystals, he realized that others had already found most of them. He needed more to fuel his Magic Spells, so he set out to take the crystals from the other Wizards. The Wizards didn't realize what he was up to at first, as he began getting the Wizards Crystals, one at a time. It took a while before the intelligent Wizards realized how he was getting the Crystals from the Wizards. The Evil One had build a device, which when connected to Crystals, would make Spell Casting very simple for the Wizard who had it. He had been selling this device, which he called Cryndows, to the other Wizards for Hundreds of Crystals. He, of course, did not use Cryndows, because it slowed down Spell Casting and frequently Stopped Working while it was most important for it to work. He claimed that the problems with Cryndows were due to the Crystals being imperfect! He was soon gathering many Crystals every month, from eager Newbie Wizards, who had trouble remembering the Arcane Commands used in the Book of Dos for casting Spells.
A few smart Wizards did not use the Book of Dos, or Cryndows. These Wizards used The Commands of Uxniinxu, another device, similar to the Book of Dos, but more Powerful! The Commands of Uxniinxu allowed the Wizards to cast a Spell, and then while it was working, cast another! The Book of Dos only allowed one Spell at a time, and although Cryndows allowed many Spells at once, it froze all the Spells except the one the Wizard was directing. Occasionally, Cryndows would Crash all the spells, and the Wizard would be Booted backwards while his Crystals were Erased and their Power was lost! The Uxniinxu followers tried to stop the Evil One, but he was too powerful now! He created Cryndows 95, and sold it to all the Wizards excepting the Uxniinxu followers, claiming that it was compatible with the Book of Dos, and was less prone to failure than The Commands of Uxniinxuu and the original Cryndows. He created it to be compatible with all Spell Casting Interfaces except for the Commands of Uxniinxu! Also, Cryndows 95 drained the Crystals twice as fast as any other Interface, and used some of the Power to speed up Spell Casting rapidly!
By now, the Evil One had decided to try for World Domination! He began Draining less successful Wizards of their Power, and Taking their Crystals! Some, he Mind-Controlled so they worked for him! His conquests included Elppa, Liamtoh, and many other Powerful Wizards! When he began taking these, the Wizard's Congress decided to punish him. Then simply made him pay 100s of Crystals each year, but by now, he was getting Millions every day! The next thing he did was create a Spell which allows it's Users to talk to each other, no matter how far away they were! He called this spell Ten-Retni Rerolpxe, because Retni was the creator of the Drain Life Spell, and Rerolpxe means Communicator in the Ancient Language. This Spell was amazing, and it worked Excellently, until he released Cryndows 98! Cryndows 98 drove the Crystals even harder than Cryndows 95 did! He also included Rerolpxe with Cryndows 98, angering many Wizards! The Congress again decided to punish him! This time, they told him to include Epacs' Ten-Rotacinummoc Spell as well. This Spell was similar to Rerolpxe, and Congress said The Evil One was being unfair with his spell. However, the real reason the Congress was angry was because The Evil One didn't contribute Crystals to the Wizard President's Reelection Campaign.
The Evil One continued anyway. The Uxniinxu followers tried to destroy the Evil One, but he was surrounded by his Followers, and a great Battle resulted! During the Battle of the Interfaces, many Wizards died, and many Crystals were destroyed. The Ever-Present Yenrab, the Purple Lieutenant of the Evil One, was killed by the Retahs in the battle. The Retahs had plotted against Yenrab since the day he began using his Mind-Control spells against the young Wizard Children. Many of the Evil One's followers died protecting him from the Uxniinxu followers, but the Evil One eventually won the battle. He quickly killed all of the Uxniinxu followers, and took their Crystals. With this victory, the Evil One became more confident. He openly ignored the Congress and told them that they could not harm him, and they should surrender immediately.
The Congress was shocked, at first. They quickly called for the greatest Army ever to be raised for battle against the Evil One. Hundreds of Wizards joined the Army, the Erodommoc Mages, the Hsotnicam Wizards, the Praw too-so clan, and the Noisi Velet Bew. The Congress also reqruited Dis Reim and his Noitazilivic. The Esorporcim group led their followers to battle as well, along with the great Drazzilb, creator of the Tfarcraw, Summon Olbaid, and Tfarcrats spells. The cunning Srekcah worked on their own, against the Evil One. They cast Iiriv spells on the Evil One's troops, infecting their Cryndows and making all the Sugbs in it activate at one, Booting the users, and erasing their Crystals!!! The Evil One summoned all his minions at once, and ordered them to destroy the Congress!!
The battle was even from the start, until the Srekcah used the Exeitna spell on The Evil One's minions. The Exeitna spell puts a forcefield around any crystals it's cast on, making them not work at all! The Evil One called Eefacm Ssri Vitna, a powerful Warlock, to use his Tnatcef-nisid spell against the Exeitna spell, and it worked. With the Exitna spell gone, The Evil One turned to Dis Reim, one of the best spellcasters alive. The Evil One quickly attacked Dis Reim, using his Power to lock him in chains with a Tiuswal spell! Dis Reim's Noitazilivic spell was worthless while he was locked in chains, and the Evil One laughed as he destroyed Dis Reim and took his crystals.
The Evil One then turned to the Esorporcim group. They seeked to bog the Evil One down with their Turn Based Spells, such as Mocx, and Vic II, but the Evil One fought them in Real-Time with the Seripme Fo Ega spell. He surprised them with his advanced Scihparg Magic and then used War Elephants to destroy their catapaults and phalanxes! Then, his numerous followers gathered weapons, and arrived to fight against the Esorporcims themselves. They were quickly overwhelmed, and the Evil One again took their Crystals.
Next, the Evil One attacked the Hsotnicam Wizards. They were using a spellcasting Device superior to Cryndows 98, yet, the Evil One's minions overwhelmed them with their sheer number. Soon, they were all dead, except for two. The first was The Woz, a great Wizard, and he fought the Evil One for almost an hour before being destroyed. The Woz's ancient Elppa spells were no match for The Evil One's power, and the Evil One had destroyed all the other Elppa users a long time ago, and knew what to expect. The last one alive was SBoj Evets, the leader of the Esorporcims. The Evil One approached, and snapped his fingers. SBoj was thrown back, and then the Evil One's minions tore him apart. The Evil One had destroyed his most powerful enemies.
However, the Evil One did not count on the Starcomed and the NacilBupers. Both were opponents of each other, but occasionally worked together on Ib-Nasitrap class issues. The first of these occured when the Starcomed and the NacilBupers, had to work together to get the budget approved for the Year. After the government shut down, Ib proposed a solution, and the NacilBupers liked it. Their Speaker, Twen, also known as Nasitrap, worked with Ib to get the deal working. When it was good, the government got the budget on track, and the President banished the Ticifed, who had been bothering everyone for a long time. But that is Ancient Histroy. What happened now, was the Starcomed, led by their president, Llib Notnilc, had obtained a Nuke spell from the Esorporcims, before they were destroyed. This was done in secret, and nobody except the Starcomed knew about it.
By now, the Congress was getting worried. They kept fighting, however. The Srekcah were still fighting The Evil One, but he eventually trapped them, and was steadily destroying them one by one. As he was doing this, Llib Notnilc, the Wizard President, used his Nuke spell on the Evil One and his minions. Most of the Evil One's Minions were immediatly destroyed, as well as all the Srekcah, who he didn't like anyway. The Evil One was outraged, as well as a little singed by the explosion. He immediatly summoned a Giant and directed it to bother Notnilc. The Giant walked over to the White House, and promptly Crashed Notnilc's Spell Server with his foot. He walked around stepping on things, and it took all the Starcomed and NacilBupers combined, except Notnilc, who was playing Solitaire the whole time, and didn't even notice half the White House crashing down. His wife, Yralih, rushed in and told him they had to leave.
He looked up and said "McDougal again?"
He wife rolled her eyes, and said "McDougal is DEAD. Stop playing Solitaire, I'm getting tired of running the government by myself! Come On!!"
"Aw, I'm in th' middle of th' game!" he complained.
"SHUT UP, LLIB!!! THERE'S A GIANT OUTSIDE!! MOVE!!" his wife shouted.
Llib complained all the way to the Magic Carpet. He kept complaining as they flew away, but not for too long. The Giant heard him, and swatted them out of the sky and into the Atlangry Ocean, where they were both eaten by a shark. The whole time the Starcomed and NacilBupers had been trying to catch the Giant, but now the NacilBupers had started laughing. The Starcomed caught up to the Giant, and were casting Web on him, but he Crashed their spell server with his foot too. They were stunned, at least until the NacilBupers revealed their Death Ray that they had confiscated back in the 101,930s (BC) from one Alokin Alset, aka, TGI. They used it on the Giant, and fried him to a crisp. Then the Starcomed scattered in fear, as the NacilBupers tried to use the Death Ray on the few who didn't run for their lives.
Some of the Starcomed regrouped later, and organized a truce with the NacilBupers. Others joined The Evil One's Minions, their brains affected by the Nuke's radiation. The Evil One plunged the world into darkness, and left the NacilBupers looking for their flashlights, which he had secretly stolen a few weeks earlier from all the NacilBupers. The Praw too-so clan attacked his minions, so used to the darkness caused by their Spell Interface, MBI. (No, I don't mean MIB. I mean MBI, like I said). The Evil One's minions had large searchlights up, though, and once the Praw too-so entered the searchlights, they couldn't see - it was too bright for their eyes. The Evil One's minions could see just fine, so they surrounded the Praw too-so and stole their Crystals while they were still blind. Then, they ran away and when the Praw too-so could see again, they didn't have any crystals.. So they couldn't cast any spells. Some of them surrendered. Some of them left to watch TV. Some of them went to sleep. Some of them decided to fight. Those that fought first looked around for some donkeys to ride, and hopped on them, figuring that they'd have an advantage over the Evil One's Minons. However, they got their donkeys' kicked by the Evil One's Assistant Vice Presidents (The Evil One hates abbreviations). When the Praw too-so fell off the donkeys, the Minions threw them off the cliff into the Pit of Yenrab, where they were hugged to death by Evil Stuffed Purple Dinosaurs.
The Noisi Velet Bew didn't even notice all this. It wasn't until the Evil One's advertisements for Cryndows 2001 appeared on their TVs that they noticed. They were outraged, and attacked the Evil One. The Evil One, though he was running short on Minions, found it easy to destroy them. Now, the only one left to destroy was the great Drazzilb. Drazzilb used his real-time Tfarcraw spell first, and the Evil One pitted it against his real-time spells. As the Tfarcraw spell started to lose, Drazzilb cast the spell Tfarcrats. This spell summoned a number of great Space Ships, which bombed the Evil One's Minions, and obliterated his real-time armies! The Evil One cast a Parw Eroc Hcaerb spell, and the Space Ships exploded. Now, Drazzilb was being surrounded by the Evil One's Minions! Left with no alternitive, Drazzilb summoned Olbaid, a creature of much power! Olbaid immediatly set to work destroying The Evil One's Minions. The Evil One was stunned to see that his spells couldn't affect Olbaid. The Evil One was soon fighting a battle against Olbaid with no armies to support him! Also a puzzle to The Evil One, Olbaid needed no Crystals to cast spells! Seeking the Power that Olbaid had, The Evil One fought harder. He soon deduced that a Wall of Water would help, and he created one in front of Olbaid. Olbaid roared in anger, and shot a burst of flame at The Evil One. Quickly, Drazzilb worked to absorb the Wall with a Sponge Spell, before The Evil One regained the advantage. With the Water gone, Olbaid grabbed the Evil One. The Evil One yelled "Don't eat me!! I'll give you 51 percent stock of " - gulp. Olbaid swallowed the Evil One whole, and then burped.
The Evil One was vanquished, and the War was won!!! The (few) remaining Wizards partied until the year 20,000 (BC). Of course, the remaining Wizards used up all their Crystals partying, and that's why there are so few Wizards still alive today. (Psychics may be decendents of Wizards - they can