Disclaimer: I do not own Dragonball or it’s characters, nor do I claim to. I do not make any profit form this story, and it was written for the pure enjoyment of fans. I do own the story itself though, so please ask permission for using it.

Merry Mayhem

Written by Carbo

What happens when Pan drags Trunks into a ‘love’ store, while Christmas shopping? A shameless, but quite hilarious humor fic. Note that Pan and Trunks just friends at this time, and I’d say their 32 and 18 of age.

Warning: Heavy sexual implications!
Rating: Parental guidance recommended for those under 13 years of age. (Boy did that sound official) In other words: PG-13

Oh, forgot! Send feedback! [email protected]

"How ’bout this one?" Pan giggled as she waived a pair of VERY skimpy pink underwear in Trunks’ face.

He just blushed deep crimson as he stared at the extremely eccentric piece of clothing, not able to mumble a single word. How in the world had they ended up here anyway? They were suppose to be Christmas shopping, he thought irritated and rubbed the back of his neck nervously, while trying to keep his eyes away from anything unsuitable, which was practically impossible since the whole store was filled with eccentric love toys, games, and erotic underwear.

Was it just him or was it really hot in here? He thought as he loosened his collar.

"Ah Pan, could we please go already? It really is hot in here and…" He spoke rigidly, trying to get Pans attention who was currently rummaging through the 20%-off basket. Seemed to be having a lot of fun at it too.

"Ah, now this is you!" Pan exclaimed gleefully and showed him a pair of black thongs for men that had ‘Badman’ written in red in the front.

Trunks blushed an even darker shade of pink, and quickly snatched them away from her and put them back in the basket. "Pan…" He drawled through clenched teeth, his patience starting to wera out. What was it about her that she always knew just which buttons to push.

"Can we please go!" Trunks huffed, more of an order than a request.

Eyes narrowing, .Pan eyed him closely with a most thoughtful expression of her face. Then a cheeky grin spread across her face and a mischievous look entered her eyes. Trunks knew he was gone for.

"You wouldn’t happened to be embarrassed, now would ya, Trunks?" She taunted, grinning smugly.

"No, of course not!" He objected in a desperate attempt to save his face, but the blush on his cheeks gave him away.

Pan’s grin just widened from his pathetic attempt of denial. "You really are embarrassed!" She laughed and smirked at him, openly amused, receiving a deadly glare from him in response.

"Why Trunks, I didn’t know you were so coy." She smirked, arching her eyebrow dramatically. She was enjoying torturing him immensely, and his pissed off expression was only fueling her amusement.

"You know what? I think I’ll stay here for a … whole hour!" She squealed with a wide grin, and waved a bunch of bras in his face, and swirling around bounced annoyingly to the dressing room, leaving Trunks glaring after her murderously. He was not very happy about getting humiliated, or the thought of spending another minute in this blasted store. I’ll get back at you yet Pan! He humped, and crossed his arms over his chest in a Vegeta-like stance.

As Trunks stood outside the small dressing room, waiting impatiently for Pan finish her torture, he stared absently through the shop window, simultaneously plotting for the perfect revenge. Suddenly Trunks eye got caught on a familiar looking couple, who obviously were also on their way to this store. His eyes widened in shock as he recognized the two. Gohan!? Videl!?

They can’t see me in here! He panicked. Frantically Trunks scanned the room for any place to hide, but to his dismay saw none, and all the dressing rooms were already taken too. Oh Kami no! He screamed as the couple were two steppes away from the door.

Then it hit him! The only possible place he could hide! Pan would probably kill him but…this was a matter of life and death. And so without giving it a second thought Trunks slipped through the curtain into Pans dressing room.

"Aaaaaahhh! You pervert!" She screamed as she swirled around, covering her chest with her hands.

"Shhh, be quiet!" Trunks hushed, trying to ignore her state of undress, which was not quite so easy. After all, she was only dressed in a pair of translucent wine red lacy panties and bra, and looked …(Trunks swallowed) extremely tempting. He could feel that blush creep up his neck again.

"Get …!" Pan screamed angrily, but was cut off by a large hand over her mouth.

"Shut up! Your parents are here!" He huffed through gritted teeth, as loudly as was safe.

Pans eyes widened in shock.

"My parents!?" She exclaimed, her voice hushed. "What are they doing here!?" She gasped, eyes wide.

"I don’t know! Maybe their Christmas shopping!" He snapped, sarcasm heavy in his tone.

Pan was about to return that comment with interests, when she suddenly stiffened. A wave of giggles and low murmuring came from only a few meters away. Curious, both Trunks and Pan turned around to peer into the store trough a small crack in the curtain. Their eyes widened the size of plates, as they saw the two parents fooling around with some handcuffs and a nurses uniform.

Not wanting to see anything else more disturbing, Pan quickly pulled away from the curtain, cheeks flushed and a disgusted look on her face.

Trunks turned around and gave her a scrutinizing glance. Then a mischievous smirk appeared on his face.

"Why Pan, you wouldn’t happen to be embarrassed would ya?"

Pan gave him a deadly glare, and growled at him as loudly as it was safe.

"Would you like to know the details of your parents sex lives!?" She snapped, seriously starting to regret ever stepping into this place.

"Well no, not really, but since they always make so much noise…" Trunks started.

"Oh shut up!" She hissed, not wanting to hear one more word. She was obviously a bit on edge, and he wasn’t helping. Though who could blame her. Trapped half naked with a guy in the dressing room of an erotica shop (not that she would have minded if the tables had been turned), while your parents are outside buying who- knows - what, while just waiting for you to get caught. Anyone in their right mind would be nervous.

"And what are you staring at!" She spat, noticing his wandering eyes over her skimpily clad body.

Trunks blushed for the umpteenth time, and mumbling his apologies, he quickly turned back the curtain.

"Hey their leaving!" He exclaimed after a moment, while watching the couple intently through the curtain.

"Finally!" Pan sighed and rolled her eyes. Then a wary look crept onto her face. "They…didn’t buy anything did they?" She asked.

"I don’t know, I didn’t see." He frowned. "But their gone!" He exclaimed happily.

"Good! Now get!" She ordered, and shoved him ungently out of the booth.

After Pan had gotten her clothes on, the two got out of the store as fast as they could, neither much wanting to stay another minute more in the shop of horror.

---------

A few days after, the Briefs, the Sons and their friends and family were all having dinner at the Son house.

Everyone was gathered neatly around the large table. Trunks, Pan, and Gohan and Videl were sitting across from each other making small talk, when they didn’t have their mouths full that is. Goku was sitting nearby also, gulping away at a speed even Vegeta would have trouble beating.

As Goku glanced at Trunks and Pan momentarily, an image of them suddenly popped into his mind from a few days ago, when Chi Chi had last dragged him shopping. Without really stopping to think about the meaning of this particular incident, he decided to mention it.

"Hey, Trunks was that you that I saw with Pan, a few days ago at the mall? You were coming out of a weird looking store…ero…what was it’s name…Erotica? Yeah that’s it!" He exclaimed, smiling as innocently as ever form behind a dish pile, while Trunks and Pan stared at him with horror. They were road kill. Trunks could almost swear he was seeing his whole life flashing before him. Kami please, I don’t want to die! I’m too young to die! He wailed silently while Pan fiercely prayed no one had heard Goku.

A loud gasp was heard before the whole table dropped dead silent, as everyone turned to stare at the couple accused. The only ones who were grinning were Goku and Goten. The first well…we know Goku, the other one: just from malicious pleasure.

The silence was broken by a loud clang as Gohan dropped his fork, completely thunderstruck. It took a second for the words to register.

"What!!!?" He screeched.

"Oh dende!" Pan wailed, and buried her head as deep in her hands as she could, while Trunks anime-fell out of his chair. Oh dende indeed, Trunks agreed. His life was officially over, and probably hers too.

End

So how’d you like it? Enough humor?

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