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Major John'sSilent Night
Episode One: Big trouble in (little) Cleaveton
When election violence in Dade County, Florida interferes with the planned staging of the 2001 Golden
Globe awards, Cleaveton gets the nod as the alternate site and prepares for the arrival of the glitterati
at spacious and elegant Binding Manor ......
 Binding Manor
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 Frank & Kathie Lee
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 Hilary Swank
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 HRH Elizabeth II
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Hillary Swank, Kathie Lee, and Catherine Oxenburg pose for the Cleaveton Gazette
"....an endless promenade of sophisticated Hollywood Glamour " Cleaveton Gazette
 The West Wing
star Martin Sheen
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 "Is that your wife, or
your daughter...?"
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 Miss Kim Cattrall,
winner
Best Cleave Gag
1981
|
 "Have you seen Liz
anywhere?"
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and now, on with the show
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 "The nominations
for ....
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Best Actress
in a
Chloro / Gas
Feature....
are......."
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 ...the suspense builds.....
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 "Where is that damned
duct tape...?"
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"Penny Lane
for
Airport 2001
the Concorde"
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 |
 |
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"Isabella Rosselini
for
Blue Velvet"
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"Donatella Smith
for
Blue Velvet "
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"the envelope,
please...."
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and the winner
is.............
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"....Penny Lane !!"
"Airport 2001..
the Concorde!!!"
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 "You fucking BITCH !!!"
(live via satellite)
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 " I won?"
(live via satellite)
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"You fucking BITCH !!!"
(live via satellite)
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.....hell hath no fury like a passed over, spoiled film star ....
On to PART TWO