The Emotional Side of Selling

by Joseph T. White

Selling is an emotional business because buying is an emotional business. Emotions fuel, drive and motivate customers to buy. Without emotional involvement people are not propelled to make a buying decision--with emotional involvement they do make buying decisions and they do it sooner than later!

Although emotions drive all our decisions, there is a solid, rational component to each buying decision. That component is "what" they buy (the business result they want to accomplish). The "what" is the solution they believe your service will provide.

These results can be measured and evaluated. They are specific and objective. They are the "rational fit" between their problem and your solution--the rational fit between what they want to avoid and the method that they buy to effectively achieve that end.

The "what" people buy is only half of the decision making process. It doesn't say "why" they choose that particular product or solution. It doesn't say "why" they chose to partner with that specific sales professional.

The "why" takes us back to the emotions that drive buying decisions. As living, breathing people our customers need to achieve some kind of emotional satisfaction, some sense of personal belief about themselves, some sense of achievement. At work, they have their own personal goals that motivate their actions and underline their decisions. They will choose and support activities that move them closer to their aspirations, and avoid activities that further them from their aspirations.

Some people are aware of what these unique motivators are and some people are not. But, whether we are aware of them or not, these motivators are factors in our decision making process--they work around them and they are powerful.

The specific emotions that drive us are different for each of us. They are based on life experience and tend not to change over time. Adults competitive in business very often were competitive in grade school.

The point to remember is that our customers choose their roles and responsibilities in business because they believe those roles and responsibilities will give them opportunities to achieve their personal Wins.

Professional salespeople look for a fit between their solution/offering and the customer's concept. That concept is the combination of business results and what they believe your solutions will make them feel (personal Wins) when they purchase or recommend. Expected business results and anticipated Wins are the two inseparable components of your customer's concept. Both components must be fully understood before a solution is presented.

When only the "what" side of buying is considered, salespeople leave it up to their customers, or even worse up to the competition, to actively incorporate the personal Wins into the solution presentation.

Very often personal Wins are not in the center of everyone's comfort zone. Business results can be measured and evaluated and are very specific. They are easy to talk about. Personal Wins on the other hand are more difficult to understand. Most salespeople don't talk with their customers about what they personally want to accomplish in their careers, do they? So if salespeople are to contribute to a customer's total concept, they must tactfully, professionally and with a touch of eloquence discuss the emotional side of buying decision and arrive at their customer's Wins.

First, a couple of caveats. The business world does not support this kind of talk. People don't talk freely about their personal Wins. So here are some hints for successful discussions about personal Wins:

1. Have the conversation outside the office over lunch or dinner--you both can relax without the restrictive atmosphere of a corporate environment.
2. Don't inquire about personal Wins in front of others. It should be done one on one, not in a meeting or in front of a group.
3. Be sincere in your attempt to learn personal Wins. You must want to know because you care about them as people. If you do not come from this position then you will get defensive comments and negative reactions and probably lose a customer.
4. Prepare, prepare, prepare. Come to the sales call with some finely tuned and crafted questions that reflect your sensitivity and promote your customer's openness.

You owe it to your clients to work extra hard to uncover their personal Wins. A significant part of their concept is emotional. If you don't surface it, how can you truly create a fit with your solutions and their concept?

Joe White is a senior sales consultant for Miller Heiman, Inc., a Reno, Nevada-based corporation that helps businesses develop sales processes. Joe joined Miller Heiman in 1989, bringing to the corporation ten years of sales and management experience as well as more than ten years in education.