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| Explanations by General Debbie/Amidala |
| "Do you mind telling me just what was going on in there Colonel O'Neill?" |
| "Well you see sir..." |
| "It was just a game of Twister sir." |
| "You expect me to believe that all you were doing was playing Twister Major?" |
| "Yes sir." |
| "Do I have idiot written on my forehead?" |
| "I do not see anything written on your forehead or face General Hammond." |
| "Ah Teal'c, he didn't mean that to be taken literally." |
| "Then why say such a thing Daniel Jackson?" |
| "What he was doing was simply..." |
| "Daniel! Teal'c! Can we stay on the subject please? Besides, it was your idea Daniel. Why don't you explain why we were playing Twister!" |
| "You mean to tell me that really is all you were doing?" |
| "Yes sir. It's really quite funny when you think about it." |
| "Do you see me laughing Major?" |
| "Ah no sir, you're not." |
| "Dr. Jackson, I think you better start at the beginning." |
| "Uh--yeah, of course General Hammond. We came upon a similar children's game on one of the planets we visited a while back." |
| "P3X-595 sir." |
| "Ah yes, the planet with the continuous party. Good planet to visit General. Nice, relaxing atmosphere. Friendly people." |
| "Thank you Colonel O'Neill but this still does not explain why you were playing Twister in Major Carter's quarters with the door shut and three female base personnel listening to you through the door." |
| "Who were the three women General?" |
| "Never mind that Colonel. Continue Dr. Jackson." |
| "As I was saying, on P3X-595, they were playing a similar game and we got to talking about that mission the other day and remembered how much fun we had when we played it as children." |
| "Do I understand this correctly? You were playing Twister because you were trying to recapture your youth?" |
| "I wouldn't say recapture sir. More like torturing ourselves General." |
| "Torture? In what way?" |
| "What the Colonel means sir is that we're not as flexible now as when we were kids. That's why we had moved the game off of the floor and onto the bed." |
| "Knees are a terrible thing to waste." |
| "Colonel O'Neill?" |
| "I meant that falling on concrete is bad enough but when you've been putting your body through physical punishment for years, concrete is the last thing you want to fall on. So I suggested that we move it onto the mattress." |
| "You suggested the mattress Colonel?" |
| "Not in that meaning General, just that.." |
| "O'Neill had already lost three games to Major Carter, General Hammond. He believed that by using the mattress to cushion his fall, he would eventually be victorious in defeating her." |
| "Thank you Teal'c." |
| "Thanks is not needed O'Neill." |
| "We were all there General Hammond. Nothing was going on." |
| "Thank you Dr. Jackson but this base doesn't need any thing else added to the already too active rumor mill and as you can imagine, this little incident is already making the rounds." |
| "Already sir?" |
| "Already Major Carter." |
| "Oh boy." |
| "You can say that again Daniel." |
| "Oh boy." |
| "Oh for crying out loud, that was a joke Daniel!" |
| "So what are you going to do about this sir?" |
| "I've got an idea Major Carter and I'm sure all of you will give your most enthusiastic response in welcoming this idea." |
| "Of course General. Fire away." |
| "Why would General Hammond throw fire at us?" |
| "He's not going to literally throw fire at us Teal'c. It's just another expression for go ahead and tell us." |
| "Then why did O'Neill not just come out and say this?" |
| "Oh for crying out loud!" |
| "I'll explain later Teal'c." |
| "Dr. Fraiser is needing some volunteers to help..." |
| "General Hammond!" |
| "Colonel O'Neill--just by being in Major Carter's quarters with the door shut looks incriminating. I have got to take action against this so others will not emulate your lead." |
| "But Dr. Fraiser sir! We already spend way too much time in her care as it is!" |
| "She needs volunteers at the Academy hospital to help train the new staff members who deal with our special cases. And you're going to be those volunteers. You got a problem with that?" |
| "No sir." |
| "Good. Report to the infirmary. I believe she said that it will take a week to do..." |
| "A WEEK! Sir!" |
| "You'll each be in isolation and acting out the specific ailment that she tells you that you have and these ailments have been things that you have brought back so you're very familiar with them." |
| "Sweet!" |
| "But General Hammond! Sir! We're supposed to leave for our next mission in 36 hours. This planet looks like it's been deserted for quite some time and..." |
| "And you will do that mission in eight days Dr. Jackson." |
| "What about my lab sir? I have objects that I've almost completed my research on." |
| "And you can finish them when you're done. Any more questions?" |
| "No sir." |
| "I have no more questions General Hammond." |
| "Uh, no. No more questions General." |
| "Good. Then report to the infirmary immediately. You're dismissed." |
| "Daniel. Do me a favor will ya?" |
| "Sure Jack. What is it?" |
| "Burn that game and don't ever suggest it again." |
| "Or any other game like it. I don't think that the General will be happy if he catches us playing any more games on base even if we are off duty.� |
| "Well, consider it burned at the stake guys." |
| "Why would you burn something at the stake Daniel Jackson?" |
| "Oh for crying out loud!" |
| THE END |
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