In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed, 
here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

   On Sears hair dryer:
   Do not use while sleeping.

   On a bag of Fritos:
   You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

   On a bar of Dial soap:
   Directions: Use like regular soap.

   Some Swanson frozen dinners:
   Serving suggestion: Defrost.

   On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box:
   Fits one head.

   On Tesco's Tiramisu desert:
   Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)

   On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
   Product will be hot after heating

   On packaging for a Rowenta Iron:
   Do not iron clothes on body

   On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine
   Do not drive car or operate machinery

   On Nytol (a sleep aid):
   Warning: may cause drowsiness

   On a Korean kitchen knife:
   Warning keep out of children

   On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
   For indoor or outdoor use only.

   On a Japanese food processor:
   Not to be used for the other use

   On Sainsbury's Peanuts
   Warning: contains nuts

   On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
   Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.

   On a Swedish chain saw:
   Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.