Blonde Jokes

1. How did the blonde explain how his helicopter crashed?
He said it was getting cold, so he turned off the ceiling fan.

2. How can you tell if a blonde has been using your lawnmower?
The green WELCOME mat is ripped all to shreds.

3. What's the advantage of being married to a blonde?
You can park in handicapped zones.

4. What happened to the blonde tap dancer?
She slipped off and fell down the drain.

5. How can you tell which tricycle belongs to the blonde?
It is the one with the kickstand.

6. Did you hear about the blonde who gave his cat a bath?
He still hasn't gotten all the hair off his tongue.

7. Did you hear about the blonde who thought he discovered that he had a twin brother?
He didn't realize he was looking in a mirror.

8. How do you know that a blond has been using the computer?
There is whiteout on the screen.

9. Why did the blonde steal the police car?
She saw 911 written on the back and thought it was a Porche.

10. What do you call a blonde who has diyead her hair so she could look like a brunnette?
Artificial Intelligence.

11. Why are blond jokes so short?
So that brunnettes can understand them.

12. How do you know a blond has been in the aquarium?
There are bits floating around the shark tank.

13. How do you know that a blond has been in your office?
The door is open, there is hair all over the place and she has left you note that she was in there.

14. Why don't blonds know where England is?
Because they think it was taken over by the Germans.

15. Why would a blond tell you that she lives in China?
Because she has just been to the park and there was a stamp on a tedy bear saying, "MADE IN CHINA".

16. How do you know a blonde has been putting make up on in front of a mirror?
There is lipstick on it.

17. How do you know a blond is truly a blond?
They woun't understand you if you talk fast.