MFFT 7000: Wine Anyone?

>>>A 3rd MST by [email protected]? Why not? Its not everyday that Archangel Bloodraven writes a lemon. And I'm always happy to MST them. I'm not putting in the lemon disclaimer. You all know that a lemon is a sexual fic and know that you read it of your own free will. Also, note that MFFT stands for Mystery Final Fantasy Theater. You probably already guessed that but there are stupid people out there. >>>As always, no characters are mine and if you sue me for not writing each individual one, you have waaaay too much time on your hands. (Cloud, Aeris, Barret, and Tifa are sitting in the Shinra prison building in Midgar. Hojo has been watching too many episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and decided to become as great as Dr. Forrester. He even hired Rude to be his faithful assistant. Cloud and the gang are waiting for their level 4 limits to build so they can escape, but Hojo's fics don't have much attack power, so they all could be there for awhile. Thankfully, Hojo has redesigned the prison to have all the conveniences of the Satellite of Love. So not all is lost. With that said, let us sit back relax and enjoy Mystery Final Fantasy Theater 7000). [Shinra Prison "of Love"] (Cloud is the center of attention. Our other three heroes are gathered around, yet keeping a sizeable distance away. Cloud stands in front of a wall of the prison with the Ultimo Weapon sword drawn.) CLOUD: Okay guys! The Limit's up and I'm ready to go! AERIS: It seems almost too soon to leave... BARRET: Yeah, I'm gonna miss this place a little... TIFA: Oh well! Hit it Cloud! CLOUD: Here we go... OMNISLASH!!!! (Cloud attacks the prison wall with his sword glowing blue energy. With his first slash, the energy dissipates. Yet Cloud continues to strike, slashing about 30 times. When the dust clears, there's a single slash mark in the wall.) TIFA: Ummm... Cloud. Are you sure that was a level 4? CLOUD: Heh heh... maybe not an omnislash? AERIS: You idiot! That was a Braver! You used a level 1 limit! BARRET: Now we gotta wait for your level 4 to build up! (Yellow light blinks next to the monitor. Hojo and appear on the screen) [Shinra Labs "13"] HOJO: What are you four doing? I just detected a jump in the energy levels around the prison. [SPOL] AERIS: Well we were trying to escape this hell-hole when smart guy used a level 1 limit instead of his level 4. TIFA: Basically he used a blowgun when we needed a rocket launcher. BARRET: He brought a knife to a shoot-out. AERIS: Tried to dig up a buried treasure with a spoon when we needed- CLOUD: Okay! Okay! I get it! Geez! [SL13] HOJO: Sucks to be you! Anyway the invention exchange is off for today. RUDE: (interrupting) He broke the gizmo. [SPOL] TIFA: Sucks to be you! So I assume we have a fic right? AERIS: And based on your threat, its a digimon fic. [SL13] HOJO: Right-o! Part 2 of Archangel Bloodraven's wonderful Mesmermon series. [SPOL] BARRET: I swear Hojo, if its a digimon/human lemon you can say goodbye to your testicles. [SL13] HOJO: Put the gun away Wallace, its human/human. But you get to find out who in the theater. Rude! Send it! [SPOL] (Red lights, Klaxxon wail.) ALL: FIC SIGN!!!! [Door 1: Its a giant 1st edition Charizard card that opens up for you] [Door 2: Its a mural of the Huge Materia, you marvel at it and go on] [Door 3: A Giant wall of ice, you cast Fire 3 and move on] [Door 4: Its a giant 1st edition Charizard card that ...whoa, Deja Vu!] [Door 5: The FF3 cast gaurds the door, they're acting OOC, so its safe.] [Door 6: Its an Oscarfic. You condemn it to the depths of Hell and go on] TIFA: You know, there are some good points to this series. AERIS: Really what? TIFA: Well, he's a half decent writer given his subject matter, and if he keeps this up we'll have our level fours up in no time. (Glares at Cloud) Okay. I was going to give up on the whole lemon thing, but a couple of my friends sent me some great MSTs ALL: Yea!!! AERIS: So that's why I didn't get a transcript. so I had to continue. AERIS: Too bad for us... That and someone threatened me with a sock filled with grape nuts cereal. (Everyone looks at Barret) BARRET: What?! I didn't do it! ...this time. So here we go again! Wine, Anyone? TIFA: With pleasure: I want a lolly! CLOUD: Would you like some cheese with that whine? By Archangel Bloodraven ALL: DUH! ~*~ A/N: Okay. In my last lemon, the digidestined ran across an abandoned castle that wasn't so abandoned as Kari and Gatomon found out. What happens next involves young children and never ending wineglasses. BARRET: The bottomless wine glass. Just $5.99 at the Olive Garden! ~*~ Tai stared in amazement as T.K. escorted Kari into the main hall. Like T.K., he too wore a simple outfit of slacks and a tunic, but his were black, Joe's were blue, Matt's were green, and Izzy's were gray. TIFA: Note how we've replaced the digidestined with the Power Rangers. Read on. "Wow Kari," Sora said. "you look great." "You don't look bad yourself, Sora." The young girl replied. "You think so? I never thought red was my color." CLOUD: Not like your crest was that color or anything. AERIS: (Sora) Screw the digital world! My crest clashes with my helmet-thing! "Well I like it." Mimi said sweeping into the room in her silver evening gown. "I think everyone looks great." "Hey Kari, what took you so long?" Tai asked. CLOUD: (Kari) We found a candle and an outfit when I needed them and I don't think the castle is all that abandoned. THAT'S ALL!!! BARRET: I don't know which is scarier, the fact that you remembered that, or how well you said it... TIFA: That he remembered it. "And why weren't you dressed? Yow!" T.K. shouted as Kari brought her food down a second too late to silence him. TIFA: Yes, the secret is out: Kari went to Akane's School of Cooking. "You weren't dressed?" Tai's jaw dropped. "No Tai, because no one I know takes a shower fully dressed. AERIS: You call that a shower? CLOUD: There WAS a lot of wetness. TIFA: Somehow I don't think it was cleansing waters... I'm sorry I stepped on you foot T.K., but that was a little more than they needed to know." CLOUD: Yeah, all they needed to know was -mmff! BARRET: (Covering Cloud's mouth) We all get it okay? "Why?" "You are so cute when you're clueless." ~*~ "I mean it Mes," Nymphomon said. "hands off." CLOUD: (Mesmermon) Aw, I wanna play with your toys! OTHERS: CLOUD!!! "Now don't be so quick, Nymph." Mesmermon said. "At least hear what I have planned." AERIS: Do we have to? "Go ahead." "Two words: Bottomless Wineglass." BARRET: Now $5.99 at -mmamffff! CLOUD: (covering Barret's mouth) Payback's a bitch ain't it? "Why Mes, those two will be so drunk they won't need any help from me." TIFA: Kari and Gatomon again?! AERIS: Oh well... when's Smackdown on? "Oh it's not just for those two." Mesmermon cracked a wicked grin. "It's for all of them." ALL: GYAAA!!!! BARRET: No! No group orgy fics! CLOUD: Hojo! I am going to kill yoooouuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!! (PA system clicks on) HOJO: Relax Strife, No group orgies. CLOUD: Phew... HOJO: ...yet. ALL: GYAAA!!!! (PA Clicks off) ~*~ "This may seem like a dumb question..." Mimi said. TIFA: Coming from princess pink, is there any other kind? "Go ahead Mimi. Coming from you we're used to them by now." Tai cracked. AERIS: Ouch! CLOUD: (Izzy) Joe! Get the glue! Tai cracked again! Mimi stuck her tounge out at him before continuing. "Anyway does anyone else get the impression that this castle isn't all that empty?" ALL: Naaaaah... "Mimi has a point." Kari said cutting off Gatomon. "I found these clothes which are a perfect fit, and a candle in our darkened room." ALL: THAT'S ALL!! "You have candles?" Izzy asked in surprise. "The room I found these clothes in has electricity and a computer." BARRET: (Church Lady) How conveeeeeenient. TIFA: I thought we agreed not to use that riff anymore. BARRET: New part, new fic. Same riffs. "And that doesn't strike you as odd?" Sora said. "A room perfectly catering to your tastes?" "Now that you mention it..." Izzy trailed off. "We're all going to die, aren't we?" Joe asked. ALL: Cliché! "I don't think evil digimon are quite this subtle, Joe." Tai said. "But you do have a good point. CLOUD: Yeah, good point in noting that you're all gonna die. TIFA: Cloud, Cloud, Cloud. If you're gonna be dark, go all the way. CLOUD: Kay! I'll remember that next time! Until we know exactly what we're dealing with we should stay on our guard." > > "Hey guy's." Matt called. "Come here." > > "What's up Matt?" Sora asked following Matt's voice into the dining room. "Something strange?" BARRET: Always. "Well if you call a full course meal that none of us prepared something strange, then yes." Matt said airily. AERIS: It didn't seem to phase you in Devimon's mansion, but anyway. "But this painting and plaque caught my attention." Matt said gesturing to a painting of a young couple. BARRET: (Matt) Damn them! They got the Escaflowne posters already! "'Welcome to home of Lord Mesmermon and Lady Nymphomon' Nymphomon?" Izzy said raising an eyebrow. "Would that be anything like..." "Not in front of the kids." Matt said. TIFA: Kids...? riiiiight. CLOUD: TK, maybe. I doubt Kari would really care if they talked about it. "Come on Matt." T.K. said. "We're not little anymore." CLOUD: Then again, I could have misjudged the little dude. "No," Matt agreed. "but this is something you shouldn't know about until you're older." You have no idea what some of us know. Kari thought. AERIS: You could interchange Gatomon's name with Kari there and it would still make sense. (Others stare at Aeris) AERIS: Bite me! "So what else does the plaque read?" She asked aloud. "'Welcome to all who enter these halls. We see all, though we are unseen we trust you shall stay as long as it gives you pleasure.'" CLOUD: (Beavis) Heheh heheh it said 'pleasure' heheh BARRRET: (Butthead) huhuh huhuh. 'pleasure' huhuh Izzy read as Kari and Gatomon flashed each other a guilty glance. "Well I don't know about you." Gatomon said. "but since our hosts were nice enough to prepare a meal for us, let's eat." CLOUD: After Gatomon eating Kari, you'd think she wouldn't be hungry. OTHERS: CLOUD!!!!! "I don't know." Joe said. "What if they're trying to poison us?" AERIS: Note how we've replaced "Wine Anyone?" with "Evil Shows His Face". Read on! "Lighten up Joe." Kari said as TK pulled out a chair for her.. "I don't know about you all, but I'm sick of fish and potatoes." BARRET: Potatoes? TIFA: Where'd that come from? "Well, the potatoes aren't so bad." TK said sitting to Kari's right. "If they had some salt and butter." ALL: (mutterings) potatoes... 0.o "Hey look." Gatomon said pointing to the glazed ham. CLOUD: Poor, poor Patamon... "A relative of yours bacon boy?" She asked taking a seat to Kari's left. "I am not a pig." Patamon squeaked indignantly, as he sat besides Gatomon. AERIS: Ummm... Patamon? I think we need to talk about your self esteem problem.... "You know something," He leaned close and whispered in Gatomon's ear. "You're right." She said thoughtfully. "Must be a fluke.." "You're real funny." BARRET: -looking. Patamon said as they began passing the food around. "Glad you think so." Gatomon said passing some mashed potatoes to Kari. "Funny looking." Patamon said. BARRET: Called it! TIFA: If you guys keep doing that, we won't even need to read these anymore.. "Why you little-" CLOUD: The part of Gatomon will now be played by Homer Simpson. "Leave him alone, Gatomon. You know it's no fair for a champion to pick on a rookie." Kari said. "What did he tell you anyway?" "Nothing." Gatomon said quickly. AERIS: Right... like "Nothing" happened between you and Kari in the bedroom either. "Gatomon." Kari said menacingly. "Patamon just said that youandTKmakeacutecouple." AERIS: TifaandCloudwanttogetinthesacktogether. TIFA: I'mgoingtokillyouforthatyoulittlebitch. CLOUD: Thatmakestwoofus. AERIS: Bothofyoucanbiteme! She mumbled quickly as Kari took a sip from her glass. "What!" TK exclaimed choking on a fork full of salad as Kari sprayed her wine. "You have got to be kidding me." She cried thumping him on the back. BARRET: Typical girl, worry about love, then prevent your friend from choking. TIFA: -if there's time. "Tell her Tai." CLOUD: Hey Gatomon! "Tai!" (others stare) CLOUD: Okay, it was a lame one... happy? "Actually, you two are kinda cute." "No Tai. You and Sora are cute. Mimi and Izzy are cute. We are just friends." ALL (minus Barret): YEAH!!! BARRET: What? CLOUD: Don't you see? Kari only named Boy/Girl couples. TIFA: Meaning Yaoi hasn't spread to the digital world yet! BARRET: Oh...okay. In that case: ALL: YEAH!!! "Methinks the lady doth protest too much." Sora said with a twinkle in her eye. AERIS: Methinks I'm going to loseth my luncheth... "We are just friends!" The youngest 'destined exploded in unison. CLOUD: (Beavis) Heheh heheh it said 'exploded' heheh. BARRET: (Butthead) Huhuh huhuh... 'exploded' Cool... "Suit yourselves." Mimi said. CLOUD: Or de-suit yourselves, whichever. OTHERS: CLOUD!!!! "Thank you." Kari said taking a sip of wine. "Cuties." She murmured. "Argh!" Kari growled starting to push away from the table. BARRET: Down girl! Siiiit... good girl... "Calm down, Kari." Gatomon said. "They're just picking on you. We're all friends, right?" The last two words had a deadly emphasis as Gatomon sliced an apple with her claws. ALL: Lightning Claw!!! "Right." The group chorused as the two youngest relaxed "Ack! I think my juice is spoiled." TK said. CLOUD: Juice? What happened to the wine? TIFA: TK and Kari are under age. AERIS: As far as drinking alcohol anyway. "It's not juice silly." Kari said "It's wine." CLOUD: Ohhhh... I get it now. "Don't you two think you're a little young to be drinking?" Joe asked. TIFA: Like you've got room to talk. You're only 18 in this fic. BARRET: Isn't that legal in Japan? CLOUD: Who knows? We'll look it up later. "Not really." TK said. "Unless of course, we're too young to be a cute couple." Kari said. "Here TK, let me show you how to drink wine." CLOUD: Oh I'm sure he could teach you how to drink something else... AERIS and BARRET: CLOUD! (Tifa calmly pulls a lead pipe and proceeds to beat Cloud unconscious with it.) AERIS: Was that really necessary? TIFA: No, I was just getting sick of him. "How would you know?" TK asked. "I've been drinking at family reunions since I was six." She answered. "You take a little sip, but you don't swallow." AERIS: Y'know... After that line, I'm glad Cloud isn't conscious. "Like dis?" BARRET: No, like dat. TIFA: I see someone's taken over Cloud's lame riff job... "Yeah, just like that. Now roll it around in your mouth. That's it. Now swallow." AERIS: Keep that pipe handy Tifa, the fic's just begging for Cloud to wake up. "Not bad." He said. "You two better make those glasses last," Matt said. "cause it's all your getting." "Just as well." Izzy said. "Our hosts neglected to leave us the bottle." BARRET: (Izzy) Cheapskates... It was about after a half hour of steady sipping that Kari noticed her glass wasn't getting any less full. "Hey guys." She said slightly slurred. "I don't think this glass runs out." TIFA: (Kari) Or am I totally sloshed and drinking my own drool? I dunno... "You're imagining things Kari." Izzy said. TIFA: (Kari) 'kay... but this drool sure has aged well... "A glass that never runs out is no more possible than..." "Flying on a giant bug?" TK interjected. ALL: Wah wah wah waaaaaaah... (Cloud starts to come to) TIFA: Well look who's up! AERIS: G'morning sunshine! CLOUD: (Weakly) Bite me... TIFA: Promise to be good? CLOUD: Whatever... just lose the pipe... That was sufficient to silence Izzy's protests. Several hours later the food was all eaten and everyone was still nursing their wineglasses BARRET: And no one's suspicious that one glass of wine has lasted for hours? I mean not even Joe? as they returned to the main hall to find eight chairs pulled in front of a roaring fire. TIFA: Of course they're all sloshed so it seems perfectly normal to them. AERIS: Cloud? You okay? You haven't made any riffs since you woke up. CLOUD: It couldn't be because my head has more bumps than Cait Sith's love life... AERIS: You big baby... (murmuring, then waving a hand at Cloud) Cure three! CLOUD: Ooooh... that feels better. AERIS: Good, now shut up and riff. "When are you two going to finish?" A bleary eyed Matt asked.. CLOUD: (Opens his mouth to say something) TIFA: (polishing her pipe) Don't even think about it! CLOUD: (Slouches in his seat and closes his mouth.) BARRET: (muttering) ...sometime before dawn. TIFA: (Glaring) Have something to share with the rest of the class? BARRET: No! ...uh... I just got something in my throat. ^_^ TIFA: You are on thin ice pal. "We've been trying." Kari slurred, flopping into a chair. "But the glasses just don't want to cooperate." TK said holding on to Kari's shoulder to keep from falling over. "You two are funny." A none to sober Patamon said. "Oh what would the five of you know?" TK said flipping Patamon the bird. TIFA: And as Biyomon went flying from TK's flip. She crashed into Patamon who flew through the window letting in the hurricane outside which immeadiatly tore into the house and the ripped digi-destined to shreds. The End! CLOUD: (Bowing) I'm not worthy! TIFA: You're right, you're not. AERIS: You really wanna beat that lemon scene don't you? TIFA: More than you know. "I know if you don't get that hand off my shoulder I'll break your fingers." Kari said. AERIS and TIFA: You go girl! (High-five) "You're so cute when your angry." TK said taking a long swig from his glass. CLOUD and BARRET: (Shake their heads in shame) AERIS: Well that showed where the real intelligence is in the digiworld! CLOUD: Yeah... in the digimon. "Perhaps you didn't hear me." Kari said reaching up with her free hand to grip TK's fingers and squeeze. "Hands off." "Geez Kari." Mimi said, "Why are you turning into such a bitch all of a sudden?" TIFA: Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. "Because you p-pink loving slut, I'm drunk and horny. Now I'd like to nurse my drink in silence." AERIS: I said it before and I'll say it again: Don't mess with the oversexed 11 year old. "Kari you apologize to Mimi." Joe demanded. "Joe, bite me." ALL: That's MY Line! (All look at each other) ALL: Bite me! She said tottering off towards her room with a very tipsy Gatomon following behind. "Kari!" Tai started to get up. "Let her go Tai." Sora said as she easily forced him back into his chair. TIFA: (Sora) If I drink some more, you may get lucky tonight. "We're so hammered we'll be lucky if we can remember our own names in the morning." "Well she still shouldn't have be so mean." "Did you think that Kari is mean?" TK asked sounding the most sober he had been since he'd begun drinking. BARRET: How can someone sound sober while...nevermind. I'll just: ALL: (Smile and nod) "Maybe that sweet girl we see is a mask, and tonight she took that mask off." "That's re- re- redi- stupid." Matt managed. BARRET: We have now secretly replaced Matt with Porky Pig. "Where are you going?" "To my own concerns." TK said following Kari. BARRET: Translation: I'm gonna go look through the keyhole in Kari's room. CLOUD: Ummm Barret... BARRET: Wha? Hyah! (Barret blows Tifa's pipe to scrap right before it hits him) TIFA: Quick one aren't you? BARRET: (blows on the barrel to his gun-arm) Yup. Fortunately she hadn't made it very far because she kept stumbling into and out of closets. AERIS: All 10... 12 of them. (MSTers note: See part 1) "Hey Kari. Can I walk you back to your room." "I don't need your help. Don't need anyone's help." She mumbled reaching for the doorknob. CLOUD: (TK) Ummm... Kari? That's not a doorknob. TIFA: You are beyond lucky my pipe is gone. BARRET: But not forgotten! TIFA: Shut up... "Hey you don't think I know what it feels like, getting up every day and pretending to be happy little TK?" "Oh what would you know?" "More than you think." TK said leading her to her room. He turned to walk away and walked straight into a wall. (Cloud pushes a button on his seat's armrest) PA: (rimshot) TIFA: Nice addition there Spikey! CLOUD: Thanks! "That does it." She said pulling him through the door. "Whaz the big idea?" He said as she dragged him into the bedroom. "You're going to spend the night with me." She said bluntly. AERIS: See lemon trigger. See FF7 cast run. Run FF7 cast, run. "You're too drunk to make it back to your room." "I'm not as thunk as you drink I am." He slurred as Kari relieved him of his wineglass. PA: (rimshot) AERIS: Don't overuse your new toy now Cloud. CLOUD: Who me? Naahhh... ^_^ "Nonsense." She said setting the glasses on the bedside table. "Look in the cabinet over there and see if there's anything we can sleep in." BARRET and CLOUD: (unison) How about a birthday suit? TIFA: Would you two please stop that? TK opened the cabinet and pulled out two silk robes, one in white the other in green. "Just these." Kari sighed AERIS: (Kari) Damn... I never thought there'd be clothes in there... and took another sip of her wine befor flopping onto the bed. "That will have to do, then." She said pulling off her shoes and stockings. As she stripped off her dress, TK stared in open admiration. "You have to have the most beautiful body in creation." CLOUD: Damn! Better than any pickup line I could think of. BARRET: Ditto... "Stop." She said taking the white robe from him. AERIS: (Kari) I mean it. Stop. "No. I mean it. When some women take off their clothes they're naked but you are clothed in beauty." CLOUD: Okay TK... you have now crossed what is known as the compliment/kissass line. He said pulling off his own shoes and socks. "Thanks TK, that's really sweet. Now all we're doing is sharing a bed for the night right?" She asked handing him the green robe. "Well, yeah. What else would we be doing in bed together?" ALL: 0_0 "You are so innocent it's heartbreaking. You don't know about..." She trailed off and whispered in his ear. TIFA: (Kari whispering) We can play Magic the Gathering in bed too. "Kari!" TK was honestly shocked. "You're my best friend! I could never do anything like that with you. It'd be too weird. We're just going to share the bed, agreed?" TIFA: (Kari) No? Then how about Warhammer? "Agreed." She said snuggling under the covers next to him and blowing out the candle. CLOUD: AHHHH! CANDLE!!! EVIL!!!! AHHHH!!!!! AERIS: Cloud! Snap out of it! (Slaps him sideways) CLOUD: (normal) Whoa... thanks Teef. Flashback there. AERIS: It happens to the best of us. ~*~ "I don't know Nymph." Mesmermon said. "Their friendship seems to be stronger than their intoxication." BARRET: Yeah... a real horrible thing having friendship that transcends liquor. Nymphomon growled softly as she watched her two playmates snuggle closer to each other. "That's all good and well, but they're not-" "Relax, baby." Mesmermon said. "They will. We just have to get a little more involved." TIFA: I thought Hojo said this wasn't a group orgy fic... "Do you mean-?" Mesmermon nodded. "Front row seats." BARRET: (scalper) I got tickets! Front row! You guys need tickets? Just $300! CLOUD: Let's go get some tickets to break time. (All leave as door sequence goes in reverse) [SPOL] TIFA: Well... so far so good. CLOUD: Speak for yourself, my head still hurts... AERIS: That's what you get for being hentai. BARRET: Let's all agree. For the rest of the fic. Perversion is legal. CLOUD: 'kay. AERIS: Alright. TIFA: ... BARRET: Tifa? AERIS: We won't survive without it Tifa... TIFA: Oh okay! I'll change from darkness into hentai-ness. AERIS: Atta girl! (Red Lights. Klaxxon Wail) ALL: FIC RESUME SIGN!!!!!! [door sequence] [1: Charizard Card] [2: Huge Materia] [3: Ice wall] [4: Charizard... deja vu] [5: OOC FF3 cast] [6: Hell-bound Oscarfic] ~*~ Mesmermon slipped back into the room. "It's done. Their digimon won't wake up until tomorrow." He whispered. CLOUD: I hope they remembered the diapers. "Good." Nymphomon purred. "Now it's my turn. Passion Kiss." She whispered blowing a kiss towards the two sleeping children. "Now we watch the fun." AERIS: Passion Kiss? BARRET: What the hell kind of attack is that? TIFA: Yeah, what about "Nympho Shot"? CLOUD: Maybe "Orgy Beam"? BARRET: I got it! River of cu- aaannmff! AERIS: (Covering Barret's mouth) Settle down tiger! TK suddenly became uncomfortably warm. He carefully disengaged himself from Kari CLOUD: (Beavis) Heheh heheh "disengage" BARRET: (Butthead) Huhuh... he pulled out n' stufff. Huhuh and threw off his share of the satin sheets but had yet to escape the increasing heat. As he took a long drink from his wineglass and untied his robe he was met with blessed coolness. Comfortable again, he replaced his wineglass and went back to sleep. Next came Kari's turn to sweat TIFA: I don't want to know... as she was overwhelmed by an unbearable heat. She too found relief by shucking her robe and kicking the sheets off the bed. "Nice start, Nymph." Mesmermon said encouragingly. "What next?" "Dreams can come true you know." ALL: (sing) When you wish upon a staaaaaar! Makes no difference who you aaaaare! Nymphomon said with a smile. ALL: (Nymphomon) "With a smile." And dreaming was exactly what the sleeping children were doing. In TK's dream he was making a pizza, gently kneading and massaging the dough. AERIS: (sarcastic) Oh where is this possibly leading? I have no idea! In reality he was massaging Kari's ass and lower back causing her to moan in pleasure. CLOUD: Why do the digidestined have to be so noisy during foreplay? AERIS: Its a stereotype: All anime characters moan during sex. TIFA: But we were anime at one point weren't we? (Others glare at Tifa) TIFA: I'm just asking! After a few minutes he settled down and sank deeper into sleep. At the cessation of her sensual massage Kari awoke with a terrible need to urinate. She was about to slip her robe back on but it was hot to the touch AERIS: (Kari) Ow! Dammit! That's the last time I let Satan dry clean my clothes! so she abandoned the idea and crept silently to the bathroom. Moments later she returned having relieved her condition and took several large swallows of wine before climbing back into bed. Upside down. BARRET: You'd think it'd be hard to sleep on your head. In her dream, Kari was sitting on a bench sucking on a lollypop. CLOUD: Mr. Owl? How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie roll center of a Tootsie pop? She was so startled when the lollipop popped in her mouth that she awoke to find TK's cock in her mouth and her face covered with his cum. AERIS: Not exactly what Mr. Owl had in mind eh Cloud? "Oh damn!" She whispered slowly pulling away and licking her face clean. "How the hell am I gonna explain that?" TIFA: Tell him that you confused the Tootsie pop with a Blow-pop. AERIS: Tifa? Think about what you just said. TIFA: What? Tootsie pop and Blow... Aw shit! "I'd like to know that too." TK asked. "Oh! You're awake!" CLOUD: Like he could've slept through a BJ. "I don't think I could've slept through that. CLOUD: Two points! TIFA: Didn't I tell you to stop that? Kari why?" "Would you believe I thought it was a lollipop?" AERIS: (Kari) I want my binky! She said squirming back around. "Where's your robe anyway?" BARRET: You've got room to talk. "I got hot!" He said defensively. "You seem to be missing a little something yourself." At a loss for words Kari wrapped her arms around him and kissed him passionately. CLOUD: When in doubt, @$%& 'em silly. AERIS: How'd you do that? CLOUD: What? AERIS: Censor yourself. CLOUD: Barret taught me! BARRET: You &@#%$ing right! "Wow." TK said breathlessly. "Look, since we didn't really do anything, let's just go back to sleep and forget this ever happened." TIFA: Right. A BJ is nothing. These are classic. CLOUD: We ought to start keeping a list. "Didn't you like it Kari? I felt real good." Too good. She thought. "I did but..." She found to her dismay she couldn't come up with a single argument. AERIS: "I'm underaged" comes to mind. BARRET: (TK) Cool! Me too! "All right TK." She pushed him onto his back and took his softening manhood in her hand. "What are you doing?" He asked with a slight tremor to his voice. "Just thought I'd try something new." She said sliding his now hard dick into her tight virgin pussy. ALL: (laugh themselves silly) CLOUD: (still laughing) Virgin...pussy... HAHAHAHAHAHA! TIFA: (settling down) Gatomon... is far... from virgin. Heh heh HAHAHA! (Everyone continues to laugh) TK liked this feeling a whole lot. He sighed in pleasure. Kari also liked the feeling of having him inside of her. He was just the right size for her. ALL: (Cease laughter and stare) AERIS: Well... uh... I don't think Kari's a virgin either. BARRET: Well at least not anymore. TIFA: But it totally killed the mood. "Kari, something's happennnnnnn" TK trailed off as another orgasm hit him. Kari sighed as she fell over beside him. "Did you like how that felt?" CLOUD: (TK/Jim Carrey) I've had better "Oh yeah." He panted. "Good. Then we can go to sleep." She said turning away from him and closing her eyes. Which shot open again as TK slid his fingers into her still wet box. AERIS: This is your heartbreakingly innocent one? "Wha-" "Shh." TK whispered in her ear. "Let me make you feel good." Kari tried to speak but could only manage a moan as TK slowly worked his digits in her pussy. BARRET: (TK) Now Gatomon, I know math is hard, but if you don't learn it I'm going to force the digits into you! CLOUD: Or force some other hard thing into her... If she could have looked back she would have seen a loving smile cross his face. TIFA: (TK) Hee hee. Sex is fun! With his free hand, he began to stroke her firm young tits slowly increasing the pace. "Takeru..." Kari moaned. "This is torture." ALL: (assorted mutterings at the same time) CLOUD: (muttering) No shit... TIFA: (ditto) You're tellin me... AERIS: (ditto) Torture for us anyway... "It will end soon enough." He said knowingly, BARRET: Wait, a few minutes ago, TK didn't know what sex was, now he "knowingly" fingers Kari? I want to know how he learned so quick.(pauses) Nevermind, no I don't. as he slowly rolled her clit through his fingers. Kari moaned loudly as TK quickened his pace to a frantic tempo. AERIS: Up tempo! CLOUD: 1...2...3...4 Double time! 1! 2! 3! 4! "OH MY GOD!!!" She screamed as the orgasm overtook her. TK lay back and smiled as she finished writhing from her mind blowing orgasm. "That was great TK, but I don't think you should be here when I wake up." TK was crestfallen. AERIS: (TK) Crap! Matt! I was crestfallen and my crest fell in the toilet again! "But why? We made each other feel good didn't we?" Kid, you could show Gatomon a few tricks. Kari thought. CLOUD: AHHH!! GATOMON! RED RUM! RED RUM!!! TIFA: (smacks Cloud upside the head) CLOUD: (normal) Whew... those flashbacks get scarier every time... TIFA: I wouldn't know. "I can't explain. Just make sure I wake up alone." "As you wish." TK said sadly as he turned his back to her. "TK..." Kari began as she lay a hand on his shoulder. He jerked away as if burned. "Good night Kari." Kari was about to argue when her eyelids grew heavy. Sighing in resignation she rolled over and the two promptly fell asleep. BARRET: I'd like to know how TK is going to wake up before Kari so he can leave. ~*~ "I don't get it, Mes." Nymphomon whispered from the shadows. "Why'd you put them to sleep?" AERIS: All hail Mesmermon! Patron saint of Lemon Mercy! CLOUD: Aeris! Snap out of it! (b*tchslaps Aeris) AERIS: What? CLOUD: You were praising Mesmermon! AERIS: Ewwww... thanks for savin' me. CLOUD: No prob. "The mood has been ruined Nymph. Not even your powers could get them to do it again with the emotion they put into that first time. I'm going to erase their memories and give the boy a suggestion to leave early." BARRET: (Mesmermon) And for kicks I'm going make him cluck like a chicken everytime someone calls Patamon a flying pig. "I want a recall command linked to my voice." "Why?" TIFA: (Nymphomon) Duh! AMC will pay big for this! "I have my reasons." Mesmermon shrugged and lay a hand on each of the children. "So Nymph, what shall we do now?" "I'm up for an instant replay." She laughed disappearing. ALL: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!! ~*~ Well, that's all for this lemon. ALL: Phew... Read, CLOUD: Had to. review, TIFA: Probably going to praise, BARRET: If I'm in the mood. flame, ALL: With pleasure. or even make a suggestion for the next lemon. AERIS: I'll leave that to you. I'm waiting. Archangel Bloodraven, Lord of Bloodraven Keep AIM: DarkArchangelXXI Yahoo! Messenger: Archangel_xxi ICQ #: 75950057 TIFA: Ladies and Gentlemen, the Author has left the building! http://destined.to/raven http://www.geocities.com/Archangel_xxi TIFA: Or not. * Shameless Plug* Digimon Hentai writers! Have you been shunned from other lists? ALL: No... Can't find one that caters to your unique tastes? ALL: No... Then come join my club, Digimonlemons. http://www.egroups.com/group/digimonlemons ALL: Hell no... CLOUD: Hey! I just thought of something! That's probably where Hojo's finding this stuff!! TIFA: So? CLOUD: I don't know how that could help us, but its something! (Tifa whacks Cloud with a seat cushion before they all exit while the door sequence shows in reverse.) [SPOL] (Others are kicking Cloud who is kneeling on the ground, trying to block as many of the blows as he can, with very little success) CLOUD: Ow! Ow! OW! Hey! Watch it! AERIS: This is for your own good boy! BARRET: And ours for that matter. TIFA: If we can raise your limit again. We can bust out. (Yellow light blinks next to monitor where Hojo and Rude are shown. Hojo's face goes from pleasant, to frightened, to angry, to uncertain, to extatic in a matter of seconds.) [SL13] HOJO: Ha! Rude! I've done it! They're trying to kill each other! I'm a genius! I've done Dr. Forrester proud! [SPOL] TIFA: Hey Hojo! Bite me! BARRET: Yeah, we were just trying to get Spikey's limit up again. [SL13] HOJO: Very well, but how was the fic? [SPOL] AERIS: Eh... TIFA: Gotta tell you, it was a lot easier to swallow than the Kari/Gatomon one. BARRET: Less to flame, but more to love. CLOUD: (groans) [SL13] HOJO: Fine! Then I'll just wait until the next fic I ordered shows up! [SPOL] AERIS: You mean when the next one comes in from Digimonlemons? [SL13] RUDE: Whoa! Aeris! How'd you know Hojo was- yahahahahaha! HOJO: (returns the tazer to his belt) *ahem* I don't know what you mean my dear. [SPOL] TIFA: Right... had enough of a break Cloud? CLOUD: (groggily) Wha? Super Saiyan Krillin? Huh? BARRET: I take that as a yes! [SL13] (Hojo watches Cloud get beat up some more before turning off the monitor.) HOJO: Damn them... my secret is out... Rude! (Silence) HOJO: RUDE! (Silence) HOJO: Hmmph... never good help around when you need it! (Hojo walks to the button) ____________________________ / /| / / | / PUSH THE @#$& BUTTON / | / JABRONI!!! / | / / | /___________________________/ / | | / | | / | | / |___________________________ |/ (FWOOOOOSH!!!!! sound effect) HOJO: Ahhh... much better. Computer! Leave Rude an auto message: "Free to go home". COMPUTER: Acknowledged. (Hojo leaves) COMPUTER: Auto message from Rude playback: (Rude's voice muttering) You don't want to know where I'm gonna stick that Tazer after I regain control of my legs Hojo, you freak! ======================================================= <<Well that does it! Questions? Comments? Flames? Death Threats? Send an email to [email protected]. Now for the stinger>> > "I don't think this glass runs out." > "You're imagining things Kari." Izzy said. > "A glass that never runs out is no more possible than..." > "Flying on a giant bug?"