Star Wars vs. Titanic
If you know of any other Star Wars vs. ... pages could you please email me their adresses so that I can make a Star Wars vs. ... links group. Thanks.
1) Titanic is big but it has no hyperdrive.
2) Star Wars has WAY cooler action figure potential.
3) Yoda could use the force to LIFT Titanic out of the water.
4) Leia is a freedom fighter, a senator, and Jedi material; Rose is just marriage fodder.
5) Ewoks throw better parties than anything either first class OR steerage ever could.
6) You would run a lot faster if you were being chased by a madman with a lightsaber than by a handgun.
7) A: Titanic is egalitarian by portraying poor people as sympathetic characters. Star Wars is egalitarian by promoting bug-eyed amphibians to admiral.
7) B: Said bug-eyed amphibian manages to keep his ship.
8) We know Cal is a bad guy because he sneers at poor and treats his fiancee like property. We know Darth Vader is a bad guy because he strangles people and blows up planets for fun.
9) Sure Leo can dance but can he fly an X-wing? Doubt it.
10) People haven't lost their lives trying to recreate scenes from Star Wars on the bow of a cruise liner.
11) Rose braves icy water to save her man; Leia braves Jabba.
12) One name John Williams
13) There are always enough escape pods in Star Wars.
14) Do you know what the Empire does to self-proclaimed "kings of the world"?
15) A: If Luke were handcuffed to a pipe below decks he would use the Force to get the key.
15) B: Luke wouldn't ever get caught and then be hand cuffed.
15) C: Luke could use the force to make the handcuffer decide not to use the hand cuffs, but instead let him go.
16) "I'd rather be his whore than your wife," just doesn't have the sting that "I'd just as soon kiss a wookiee."
17) Han is frozen in carbonite and becomes a wall ornament. Leo
simply freezes.
18) Han Solo would never have hit the iceberg in the first place.
19) Everyone knew the boat would sink. But who would have anticipated "Luke... I am your father."?
20) Stormtroopers blow holes in stupid minor characters; almost
everyone in Titanic was a stupid minor character.
21) Dead people in Star Wars have a cool glow around them. Dead
people in Titanic just have little fish around them.
22) When Star Wars was proclaimed coolest movie of all time by half of the world George Lucas didn't make an a** of himself at the
Oscars.
23) Titanic morals include; gamble, cheat on your future husband,
pose nude for pictures, pre-marital sex is OK if you're in love, ect. Star Wars morals include; fight evil,do good, respect all life even if it is ugly and slithers, rescue princess, save planet.
24) R2-D2 nuff' said
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