And so I'm back
From outer space
Just standin' here and enjoyin' that look upon your face
Did you think you'd found some secret,
That you'd finally found the key,
When so many of your betters have all failed to kill me?

Boy, now here
Right here's death's door
Just push me through now
I'll come crawlin' back for more
Aren't I the one who walks straight through phaser fire?
You think I'd really-
You think I'd permanently die?

Oh, no, not I! I do survive!
Oh, as long as my ratings are up
I know I'll stay alive!
The fans want me to live
So's long's they've got dough to give
I'll survive, I do survive, hey, hey...

musical interlude

Always when my ship and I are far apart
And my death breaks my crew's dear collective heart
And all the time I've been in danger by myself
I always die
But I get sent back from On High

And here I am
That's nothing new
I'm not that stupid little mortal still afraid of you
So you drop me out the airlock
And expect my soul to be freed
Well you'll just have to pick a number
If you desire to kill me

Right here's death's door
Just push me through now
I'll come crawlin' back for more
Aren't I the one who walks straight through phaser fire?
You think I'd really-
You think I'd permanently die?

Oh, no, not I! I do survive!
Oh, as long as my ratings are up
I know I'll stay alive!
The fans want me to live
So's long's they've got dough to give
I'll survive, I do survive.........

Captain Kirk or whichever Trek character you decided this best applies to (there are many other possibilities) is copyright Paramount and Viacom et. al. Phasers also are copyright them, but airlocks and random villains aren't copyright anybody. The song I Will Survive, sung by Gloria Gaynor, is copyright somebody but I don't know who. I'm not making any money off this. No infringement is intended. Did I miss anything? Does anybody wish to challenge my claim that I'm making money off this? Did anybody ever think I was? Ah, well, g'night all.