From rhonilak@icontech.com Sat Mar 22 21:40:50 1997 Subject: NEW: Cuddly (Humor) From: Rhondda Lake -------- Disclaimer: CC owns a third. Someone else owns a third and I own pretty much nothing but putting them together. Category: V, H, C Summary: It's a crossover but to tell you with what will ruin it. Hopefully it will remain fun even if you never realize what this is crossed with. No MSR, but hopefully lots of chuckles. Cuddly by Rhondda Lake Scully was tired. Dead tired. Ooops, wrong phrase. She looked down at the remains of the deceased apologetically. Once more, Mulder had drug her out for a nice little trip in the woods. Complete with Ranger Bob. No joke. He introduced himself as Bob and ignored Mulder's Yogi jokes. Scully TRIED to ignore the Yogi jokes but they fell flat in the face of the viciousness of this animal attack. The tenth victim thus far. The victim had been a hiker. Male, late twenties. Whatever had gotten a hold of him had managed to rip his head right off. NOT a fun sight. THEY were here because no one could identify what kind of animal had done the attacking. Mulder was convinced it was an X-File. Scully was convinced that Mulder just liked to roam aimlessly through the forest wearing hiking boots and a leather jacket. Scully looked up at Mulder and Ranger Bob. "This man's only been dead for about ten hours." She informed them. "Then whatever is killing people may still be in this area. I say we split up and fan out. We may find it yet." Mulder suggested. Scully clamped her teeth shut as Bob agreed. He would. Didn't Mulder know he was signing Bob's death warrant? Splitting up with a incidental character while hunting something dangerous ALWAYS got said character killed. It was tantamount to wearing a red shirt. Never wear a red shirt. Never. Or meeting a grad student. For some reason she'd noticed an abnormally high grad student death rate around herself and Mulder of late. Scully pulled her gun and took the middle way, as Mulder had taken the left and Bob the right. She'd only been trudging through the underbrush of abnormally thick shrubbery for ten minutes when she heard the faint scream to her right. Bingo! Another one bites the dust. She hurried in the direction of the scream. She wasn't really surprised when Mulder caught up with her so they could approach together, even though he had been further away. Must be the longer legs. Or less shrubbery in his direction. Up ahead they could see a cave. Mulder motioned her into a crouch. Great, he was playing macho leader man again. She wondered if Skinner would complain too much if she shot him and buried the body out here? Crouching, they peered over a slight rise to look at the cave mouth. It was littered with bleached bones. Most animal, but there was more than one human skull in there. Ranger Bob lay in the midst of the bones, his head lay to the side. There was no sign of his attacker. The only sign of life below was a little white rabbit that must have just hopped from the underbrush. "I'm going to go check it out Mulder." She started to get up, only to feel a hand clamp on her shoulder. She turned to meet Mulder's wide, frightened gaze. "Don't, Scully, that thing is a killer." "Mulder, it's a bunny. A cute, fluffy, bunny. It's harmless. I think you've finally snapped." "But... but look at the BONES, Scully. Look at the corpse. It's a vicious beast." "Don't you mean horny beast?" she snapped, "Come on, Mulder it's a cuddly little rabbit. See. It has a fluffy tail and a twitching nose..." "And blood, look at the blood around it's mouth. It's the killer, Scully." "Mulder, it's more likely to be the Easter Bunny." She shrugged off his hand and made her way, carefully to Ranger Bob's body. Yup, he's dead, Jim. Suddenly there was a roar to her left and she spun to see four pounds of white fur and pointy ... ears? It was jumping right for her throat. She heard a gunshot and saw it fall. Mulder picked his way to her side, reholstering his gun. "So... Scully, Hossenfeffer?" ----the end---- Out of nowhere a ban of minstrals appeared, and there was much rejoicing. ---really, truly the end--- Ok, it was short and stupid, but I had to right complete fluff after the last three parts of my story. Anyone get the crossover? ::snicker::