Title: Telepathic Desire
Author: Romantika~*
Feedback: Appreciated!!! [email protected]
Disclaimer: Like, Mulder and Scully's minds belong to like Mulder and Scully-you down with that?
Spoilers: This is sometime post-Triangle so there are spoilers for Triangle in here and maybe some other stuff...oops.
Summary: Mulder and Scully become telepathic and that's when the trouble starts.
Author's Notes: This was written really quickly 'coz I thought the idea of it was *so* cool...hopefully it works and isn't *too* confusing!

[] =mulder thoughts

<> = scully thoughts

(1/?)

Martin Jacobs� House
Wednesday, 15th March
1:13pm

"Don�t touch me! As soon as you touch me, you�ll have my �gift� too..." Martin Jacobs cried, stepping backwards, waving his gun about hysterically as Mulder and I tried to approach him calmly. "Please Miss.Scully, you don't want this! I know, you�re trying the �calm� approach, you think I�m hysterical. But I just want to protect you. Both of you," he said, glancing at Mulder. Mulder looked at me pointedly as if to say "See! Told you he was psychic!" and I looked back at him defiantly as if to say "Anyone could tell we�re trying the �calm� approach!" "You two sure have a way of communicating," Jacobs said thoughtfully. Just as I was about to question him, a cry rang through the air and he slumped to the floor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I watched my redhead partner run towards the figure lying cold on the floor and saw her reach down to feel for his pulse.

"No! Scul-" Before I could finish her name, her finger grazed his neck and she began to convulse. Without hesitation, I ran towards her and embraced her, in an attempt to comfort her shaking body. Instantly, I felt an energy spread into my arms, up through my shoulders and neck and then encircling my brain.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All I ever need is his touch to ground me. In his arms, I could regain control of my body and mind, when my senses had been slipping away. I noticed he was now convulsing back and forth, each spasm hitting him like an electric shock. I pulled him back into my arms and rubbed his back until his body was still once more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

3:30pm

"So what did he die of, Dr.Scully?" I asked, walking as close as I could towards her, without getting too close to the open body that lay on the autopsy table.

"Cardiac arrest," she said, with a slight tone of expectancy in her voice.

"Why?" I said, my brain scanning possible reasons for the man�s sudden death.

"Well Mulder, I believe his heart stopping *may* have been a factor," Scully said looking up at me, with a hint of a smile on her lips.

"Good work, Doctor. What I mean is, why did this man suddenly have a heart attack?" I said, asking myself as much as I was asking her. After a few seconds of silence passed, Scully opened her mouth. I could almost hear her rational explanation before she said it.

"He wasn�t exactly in his prime time, Mulder. He was 56 years old. He was in a stressful situation. His weak heart just gave up on him."

"Yeah," I said in reply, without much enthusiasm. "How about a neurological exam?"

"Haven�t got to that part yet."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"OK, Scully. [Maybe you�ll find something interesting there.] Call me when you finish."

"I don�t think so Mulder."
"You don�t want to call me?"

"No I mean, I don�t think I�ll find anything."

"I didn�t say you would."

"Yes, you did."

"No, I didn�t."

"Yes you did."

"*No*, I didn�t. [Hmm. Little bit cranky today, are we?]"

"No!" I yelled. He looked taken aback. "S-s-sorry Mulder. I guess I *am* a little cranky. It�s all the stress of this case."

"That�s OK, Scully," he said, looking extremely pensive. "[I never said she was cranky. I *thought* she was cranky.]"

"Oh, no Mulder! Don�t get started on one of your weird theories. I�m just not in the mood."

"[�Don�t touch me. As soon as you touch me, you�ll have my "gift" too.� Scully touched him...maybe just *before* he died.]"

"If you�re gonna talk, at least talk to *me*, instead of to yourself, Mulder!" I cried, getting exasperated.

"My theory? I don�t exactly have a theory yet. I believe Jacobs was telepathic and-"

I cut him off, "I didn�t, I didn�t...I didn�t ask what your theory was, Mulder.""

"Yes, you did!"

"No, I didn�t!"

"*Yes*, you did!"

"Deja vu," I said, in a resigned tone.
"Then maybe you should go home, Scully." I looked at him suddenly.

"Mulder...all I said was �Deja vu.�"

"But I heard...either we�re schizophrenic or something weird is going on here, Scully." I groaned. Neither option was appealing.

"I know, me too Scully." I looked at him in surprise. "You...didn�t say anything there either, did you?" he said quietly. I shook my head. Yeah, something weird was definitely going on.

END PART 1

(2/?)

"OK. So we�re both telepathic, huh?" I said cheerfully. My sweet, little redhead partner just looked at me. "Scully? You must admit-this is gonna be pretty cool. I mean, we can actually experience telepathy-firsthand! This is amazing..."

"I�m not sweet, Mulder." [OK, maybe there are a *few* bad points...like, I can�t think any *thoughts* about Scully.] She looked at me sharply. [Shit. This is *not* gonna be easy.]

"Mulder, this is too weird. Even for us. It�s like you�re speaking your thoughts or something. And there are too many of them... my head feels overloaded."

"Maybe that�s what drove Jacobs hysterical...anyway, it�ll be OK, Scully. It�s not like we ever lie to each other or anything...right?" I said, desperately trying to keep any ScullyThoughts away from my head. [Think of something boring. AD Kersh. Something *really* boring. Diana Fowley. This is *so* tiring.]
"I know Mulder. I want to think freely too. It�s kind of like we have no privacy whatsoever now. "

"Now I know what you *really* think of Diana," I paused. "Are you jealous of her?"

"No! " I smirked at her. " Mulder, that�s not fair! You can�t ask me that kind of thing, when I�m so..."

"Vulnerable?" She nodded slightly.

~~~~~~~~~~

Mulder looked at me with hurt plastered on his expression.

"Two can play at that game. Were you jealous of Ed?"

"[Blockblockblockblockblockyesblockblockblockblock]" I grinned victoriously.

"You can run but you can�t hide, Mulder."

"Whatever," he said grumpily. "Let�s go back to our *separate* homes."
"Actually, Mulder, that�s a good point. I wonder how close we have to be to connect....telepathically," I said the last word quickly before any other kind of word could sneak into my mind.

"Scully, you don�t have to be psychic to guess what other word could have-" I threw my bag and it hit him on the head before he could finish his sentence. "[She�s so cute when she�s mad.]"

"I�m so *WHAT*??!!" I squeaked in disbelief.

"Oh, nothing," Mulder replied quickly, blushing furiously. "Let�s take the rest of the day off."

"Uh...good idea," I said, still in shock from what I *knew* I�d just heard coming from his mind. "Mulder...when Gibson said you had a dirty mind, I never thought-"

"Shut up Scully," he interrupted.

"Sorry Mulder. Couldn�t let the opportunity go to waste. Just in case this telepathy thing has worn off by tomorrow," I said, grinning sweetly as we walked down the corridor. <2-1 to Scully...>

"*That�s* a good point," he said, stopping in his tracks. I dreaded what was coming. I knew it would be bad, but I didn�t quite know *how* bad. "So Scully, do you love me?"

END PART 2

(3/?)

I asked it nicely. I even gave her a decent motive for asking it. It had been her who�d given me the motive anyway-"Just in case this telepathy thing has worn off by tomorrow." So I asked her. The question of all questions. Do you love me? That question had so many levels, so many layers and there could be so many answers. But I only wanted the most simple one, or perhaps the most complicated one. Yes. That�s all she needed to say. Yes. And I would have left it at that. So I finally got up the courage to ask it, but as always, she has to go and make it so difficult for me.

"Ha. Ha. That�s very funny, Mulder. Can I go home now?"

"No! Why�s it funny? Am I so impossible to love?" I said, attempting my best puppy dog eyes.

"Mulder, I *know* you�re trying the puppy dog thing. I can read your mind now, remember?"

"Then how couldn�t you tell I was being serious?" I asked quietly, grabbing her hand. She looked down at our entwined hands and my heart skipped a beat. Or two.

"I...Mulder... that question...it�s just got so many levels, you know? I mean, it�s like asking me, what is love? Nobody has ever actually responded to �What is love?� with an answer everyone agrees with! It�s an impossible question. You know I can�t answer it." Suddenly I realised I couldn�t separate what she was saying and what she was thinking.

"I can answer it," I said softly, looking into her crystal blue eyes. She looked back into mine with equal intensity.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I never quite noticed how beautiful Mulder�s eyes are. In the dark hallways and shadowy warehouses we frequent, his eyes are a deep brown. Soft. Intense. Dark. Warm. Then sometimes I look into them when we�re outside, occasionally lucky enough to be in the sunshine and the light strikes his face, lighting up the striking shade of green in his eyes. I believe I�ve even seen his eyes bear a vague blue shine. However many times I�ve looked into those eyes, searching for his soul, I�ve never seen them look quite the way they look now. They�re brown with strikes of green shooting out from the pupil and there, in the deep, dark centre lies an incredible clarity. Vulnerability. In that second, I realised the power I hold over him. Somehow, I felt unworthy. I couldn�t even answer a simple question. It�s anything but simple. Apparently he could answer it. Did I want to know the answer? Did I need to be told? Did I already know?

"You do already know, Scully. I�ve told you before." The hospital. There�s no place like home. All I knew right then was I didn�t want to lose him again. I didn�t want to feel that suffocating dread settle over my body again as I rushed all over the Hoover building, trying to get help from someone, anyone. Panic. Dread. Hysteria. Losing Mulder brings up just about every emotion known to a woman. "Does that include love, Scully?"

"Mulder. You know I love you. You�re my partner and my friend. My best friend," I amended.

"Is that all?" he said, looking somewhat sadly at me.

"Is that *all*? Mulder, I�d do anything for you. I�ve cried for you, I�ve lied for you and God knows I�d die for you. I mean, how much more is it possible to love someone?"

"I�ll show you." And suddenly he was leaning towards me and I was powerless to move. Suddenly, I realised I had no power at all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So now she knows I wasn�t delusional. That "Oh Brother" had punched me hard in the stomach. I guess I can�t blame her...looking back, it does seem pretty unbelievable-me, Scully, 1939 and the Queen Mary. Me and Scully kissing in 1939 on the Queen Mary. At the time, kissing Scully, 1939 version or not, seemed pretty unbelievable, but right now it seems very believable. Just as I�m leaning into her, as I have done twice before, she opens her mouth to speak and my whole body freezes in fear.

"You dreamt you kissed me, Mulder?"

"Am I dreaming now?" She smiled the sweetest smile in the world.

"I mean, in "1939"..."

"We *were* in 1939, Scully. Maybe it wasn�t you...maybe it was your look-a-like Grandmother or something, but-"

"Uh, Mulder, stop right there. I really don�t want to hear about what a good kisser my Grandmother was." It was my turn to smile.

"Scully, I�ve said it before and I�ll say it again, as many times as I need to say it until you believe me. I love you."

"You know what�s amazing Mulder? I don�t even have to read your mind. You�re just saying exactly what you think, what you feel. I can�t do that, Mulder. " I grinned at her.

"You don�t have to say it for now, Scully." I pulled her into a hug.

END PART 3

(4/?)

Mulder loves me. He actually *loves* me. Why is that so hard to believe? Well, he�s Mulder. Assigned partner, difficult best friend, unique Mulder. My Mulder. He has a place in my heart that no-one else will ever, or could ever, fill, however annoying he is at times. But even when he�s annoying, like when he exploited our new-found telepathy, I still love him. I will always love him. Even if I can�t say it out loud. Now he knows. Now we both know. But where do we go from here? I want to just stay in his arms forever. Maybe the rest of the world will just disappear from around us and we will be left here, undisturbed, eternally protected from the predators who seek to tear us apart.
"Scully? Dana?" Mulder pulled back slightly from our embrace and tenderly brushed a stray hair from my cheek, "This *is* real. It can�t get any more real than this. After 6 years, we�re finally being true to each other. Even if you can�t say it out loud." He said the last sentence with an affectionate smile.

"Mulder...you know we can�t be *together*. Not in that way. Being *together* would tear us apart." He looked at me questioningly. "Imagine if Kersh found out. We�d be transferred to separate departments in a second. They wouldn�t think twice about it. In fact, it would probably be a gift from heaven to them-they�ll use any excuse Mulder." He was thinking so hard, trying to come up with any kind of reply that would convince me it would be OK. I shook my head sorrowfully. "You know it�s impossible, Mulder." And with that, I turned around and walked out of the building. I�m sure it was another blow to the stomach.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After about 5 minutes, I couldn�t hear her thoughts anymore. During those 5 minutes, I learned that she thinks what she�s doing is best for me, best for the both of us. She thinks she�s saving our work, salvaging what chance there may be left of us being partners again. I know she�s doing the "right" thing. But it�s not right for us. I can�t live without being with her-6 years has been long enough. From this moment on, nothing�s gonna stop me getting her back into my arms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I lay in my bed, tossing and turning, before I finally realised that there was no way I was getting a single second of sleep that night. For once that day, I couldn�t hear anything and strangely enough, that was the problem. In contrast to the rest of the day, it was a little bit *too* quiet.

[Scully! Can you hear *me*?]


[No, I couldn�t sleep and suddenly I started hearing you talking about it being too quiet or something....]


[Not everything�s impossible, Scully.] God, I�m trying to do the right thing and he makes me feel guilty. [Sorry.] I smiled despite my mild anger.

[This is amazing...it�s like we�ve got really long-distance walky-talkies!] I laughed. Trust Mulder to think of something like that. [Do you trust me, Scully?]


[Then can�t you trust me to keep our "relationship" a secret?]


[You sure think a lot at 1am in the morning, Scully! And I don�t really see us as the "Bye bye honey" types.] I smiled. That was for sure. [And, Scully? I could never hate you. You�re more important than my quest now. I don�t know when you became more important or when I realised it, but you just kinda sneaked into my heart. And you�re staying there.]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wow. Scully just said "I love you" again. Well, not out loud. But she never says it out loud. Suddenly, my phone began to ring. I picked it up gingerly. Who in the hell was calling at 1am?

"Hello?" I said, croakily into the phone.

"I love you. See, I can say it out loud." I laughed.

"How come I didn�t hear you thinking you were gonna call me?"

"I guess you were thinking too much to hear me thinking. That happens a lot you know, Mulder. It always has."

"What do you mean?"

"Sometimes I�m speaking, but you�re too busy thinking, building your own theory, to hear what I�m saying."

"I�m sorry, Scully."

"Just don�t let it happen too often, OK?" I nodded, feeling so close to her, I forgot we were miles apart. I heard her sweet laugh flow out of the earpiece and then her voice, "I feel close to you too, Mulder." A second of comfortable silence passed.

"Come on Scully, we better get to bed."

"Together?"

"I *wish*! We better go to our *separate* beds or we�ll be too tired tomorrow to solve this case."

"You�re being rational?! I�m seeing a whole new side to you, Mulder."

"When have you said that before?"

"Huh?"

"I can just hear you thinking that you�ve said that before...to me."

"Not exactly to *you*. I�ll tell you about it later." I grinned, knowing she truly would.

"OK...and Scully?"

"Yeah?"

"I *do* love you."

"I know. I mean, I *really* know. Your mind doesn�t lie. And apparently, neither do you."

"I could never lie to you. At least, not without you knowing." I could almost hear her smile.

"�Night Mulder."

"�Night Scully."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Should I stop here or should we have some fun reading Kersh's mind??? You decide and email me!! [email protected] Thankz for reading!