senate

Date: September 14th, 1998

Dear Commander,

This is to inform you that we will having our semi-annual Senatorial BBQ and Debate in the North Corridor of Coruscant City, just east of the Palpatine Love Fountain. Our guest speakers will include Darth Vader, Senator Guy Smiley and Janitor Frank Murray. There will be no pre-arranged seating due to last year's balcony problem.

We will be blessed with hearing the Dark Lord's dissertation entitled: "The Dark Side of the Force and Why it Works for Me." This was a continuation study of our Dark Lord's previous article, "The Light Side is for Pussies." Sen. Smiley will be discussing the pros and cons of referring to Emperor Palpatine as His Whineyness and Sir Shock a Lot. Janitor Murray will embibe us with how to clean dead, rebel scum from the bottom of a stormtrooper's boot.

Parking will be available for all TIE fighters and Tydirium shuttles provided you have a sticker. Please place stickers in a noticeable fashion. There will be no Star Destroyer / Dreadnaught parking available. Sorry about that, we had serious problems last year with over zealous starship commanders.

Sorry, no rebels allowed.

Bring your own beer, Guiness will be provided.....many Bothans died.....to get this beer....

We look forward to seeing you here at beautiful Coruscant, and remember, when in doubt...feel the hate.

Sincerely,

Mark Peterson
Coruscant Human Resources, Events and Recreation Pubic Relations Manager

Date: June 27th, 1999

To Mr. Sally Gregory,

This is to inform you that we will having our 2nd semi-annual Senatorial BBQ and Debate in the North Corridor of Coruscant City, just east of the Palpatine Love Fountain. It is unfortunate that you could not join us for our first BBQ and Debate in September of 1998. It was a huge success, we grilled Gugan over the firepits, brought death and annihilation to many a
planet infested with small, hairy creatures, and we were able to officially open the Death Star Child Care Center (DSCCC). We also were able to re-enlist many rebels that discovered the folly of their ways and have returned to serve our great empire. Have you taken the opportunity yet to view the new TIE Fighter Academy? Hundreds of potential TIE Fighter pilots
are lining up the hallways and signing their lives away on the dotted line, looking to spread the good word, the Palpatine Word that is.

Have you the chance to visit the new Hall of Sexual Innuendo? If not, such great lines as "I don't care what you smell, just get in there, you furry oaf!" and "...and I thought they smelled bad on the outside." and who could forget, "I didn't make it, it impacted on the side." We hope you won't forgo this new addition to the Palpy Museum.

Our guest speakers will include Jabba the Hutt on his dissertation entitled, "Pod Race Urination: the never-ending struggle to retain control of a junk planet" and Boba Fett's rendition of Little Women. There is also a full length musical playing called, "Whiney-Ass Bitch: The Luke Skywalker Story." Get your tickets soon, there aren't many left!

We are proud to announce a raffle for a brand new Star Destroyer. Lord Vader has supplied us with a Victory class Star Destroyer to be given out to one lucky ticket holder, so don't lose your tickets. Gas and thousands of men needed to pilot the ship are not included.

This BBQ has been brought to you by IG-88 cuz when you need someone dead, and you ain't got the balls, hire a bounty hunter.

This has also been brought to you by Tydiruim Inc. who are introducing a new set of battleships, the Penetrator Series. When you wanna lay waste and slaughter millions, doing it from orbit makes it a lot easier!

If you are interested in joining our celebration of tyranny, please RSVP soon for seating and parking are limited. Sorry, no Ewoks allowed (fire safety hazard).

We look forward to seeing you here at beautiful Coruscant, and remember, when in doubt...feel the hate.

Sincerely,

Mark Peterson
Coruscant Human Resources, Events, and Recreation Pubic Relations Manager

Date: January 10th, 2000

Dear Members of the Not-So-High Council,

This is a formal e-invitation to the one and only 3rd Semi-Annual Senatorial BBQ and Debate! Last year's event was truly a festive time for us all and we hope to repeat its spiciness and sassiness. Good times were had by all (except for a few unfortunate Ewoks).

You are invited to join us this year once again for Imperial Fun and Laughter! The BBQ will be located in the North Corridor of Coruscant City, just east of the Palpatine Love Fountain as it has been for the past 2 years. Parking will be available at Parking Dock 4, 3 parsecs south of the Stormtrooper Bar & Grille (Adults Only - Nude Aliens) and the Admiral Thrawn
Hotel and Casino.

This year, we are blessed once again with his nastiness, known to enemies as Sir Shock a Lot, known to his girlfriends as Emperor Butt Monkey, and known to his tailor as Ol' Stinky Robes....Emperor Palpatine! He will be cruising in from the Silver Death Testicle to warm our hearts and scorch our flesh with his electric love! He has asked that fans do not wear the shirts distributed underground by IG-88 that say, "Emperor Palpy: Our Super Homey," or the shirts that say, "Dat Niggah Palpy."

A BBQ wouldn't be a BBQ without some good eating. We will have roasted Gungan, tender Ewok, peppered Wookie, and Smoked Rebel. It will be a feast fit for a Dark Lord of the Sith. You may bring your own beer, but please remember to drink responsibly. We don't want to have the same problem that we had last year, those Ewoks didn't appreciate their new "haircut," nor did they enjoy the makeshift "log ride" that was created as a form of engine cleansing system for shuttles.

Make sure that if you ignite your lightsaber that you use protection.

We will also be humored with Darth Maul's presentation of "Moonstruck," the wiley Cher classic. Darth Maul was recently acknowledged for graduating from veterinarian medical school. Dr. Maul will also be performing in "Red Face, Red Booty: Someone Get Me Some Ointment!" a contemporary look at the trials and tribulations of a Sith Lord, and the musical "Romeo and Romeo: A Sassy Love Story." Dr. Maul's move to the performing arts has many a dark lord up in arms. We look forward to seeing what it is he feels he needs to prove to the Imperial community.

Dissertations will be presented as well for a Ph.D. in Imperial Hoes and Imperial Culinary. Boba Fett will present his paper, "Dem Hoes and Me: The Lonely Life of a Bounty Hunter." This will be a follow up paper to his Master's thesis entitled: "Why I Don't Get No Booty: The Tragic Story of a Bounty Hunter Gone Wrong." I think this makes us all ask an important question: Boba Fett: Bounty Hunter or Booty Hunter? Yoda will present his dissertation from the Not-Exactly-Tasty Imperial Culinary School entitled, "Why You Don't Eat Ill-Tempered Ewok," and "My Goodness, Jar Jar Tastes Like Ass." Yoda will close with useful recipes for those of you who eat.

We look forward to seeing you here at beautiful Coruscant, and remember, when in doubt...feel the hate

Mark Peterson
Coruscant Human Resources, Events and Recreation Pubic Relations Manager

**enclosed are promotional posters :)

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